Disclaimer: …As evil!Carl once so wisely said, 'Weak'. For this is the summery of how I feel about this chapter, but since I can't go anywhere further in the story without posting this…siiiiiiiiiigh. Weak filler-semi-plot-related chapter it is.
As usual when he paid Doof a visit, Perry kicked down his door. As expected, Doofensmirtz came running.
"Perry the Platypus? What are you-? You kicked down my door! Why?! Why would you do that Perry the Platypus? I'm not even doing anything evil today, like I haven't been doing for the past THREE DAYS! And I thought you were on vacation! Does vacation mean for you to go to people's houses and kick down their doors? NO! No it does not Perry the Platypus! Unless you were put up to this by one of your friends...DID MONOBROW TELL YOU TO BREAK DOWN MY DOOR?!"
Perry rolled his eyes and motioned Doof to bend down and pay attention. He didn't have all day to sit around and listen to the guy ramble about his issues involving his door.
Stopping mid rant, Doofensmirtz gave his nemesis a questioning look and bent down so they were eye-to-eye.
"Yeah Perry the Platypus? What is it?"
Perry waited till Doof was in just the right spot before squarely punching him under his chin.
"OW! PERRY THE PLATYPUS! WHAT WAS THA-" to Perry's slight surprise, the man froze and began backing up from him. "Oh No…You have THAT face…the face that means you're going to put me in more pain than usual…if this is about your guys' intern…HE CONTACTED ME FIRST! I SWEAR ALL I DID WAS ANSWER HIS QUESTIONS AND LEFT HIM ALONE!"
Perry froze. Carl…contacted Doof…and asked him questions? About being evil? The inator? What?
"…you guys don't…." Doof gave him a weak smile. "You know what? Its early Perry the Platypus, I'm probably still half asleep, making things up, saying stuff that doesn't make sense. So…uh…you can go or beat me up or you know, break my door even more. Cuz it's your vacation…do you need something to thwart? You can thwart my toaste-"
'The baddest evil genius-that's meeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot! The baddest evil genius-that's meeeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot! The baddest evil genius-that's meeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot!'
Perry gave his nemesis a disbelieving look. The man did not have his computer set up to sing that every time he got an email. Doofensmirtz gave him a sheepish look. "…that's my email Perry the Platypus…I should probably get that before you…smash it or something. Stay here."
Perry rolled his eyes and followed the man. The guy was not going to get out of explaining contacting Carl that easily.
"krkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkr krkrkr"
Doofensmirtz gave him an annoyed look. "I don't have to tell you anything Perry the Platypus…or should I say PERRY THE NOSYPUS!"
Perry shook his head and sighed a little. Monogram had told him to help Carl, and if Doof had any information that could help him, well, tough luck for the doctor. He was going to talk.
Doofensmirtz had probably taken at least another two steps before he was hit by a flying tackle by his nemesis.
"HEY! OW! PERRY THE PLATYPUS WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU TODAY?! IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSISSNESS WHAT HE ASKED ME!"
'The baddest evil genius-that's meeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot! The baddest evil genius-that's meeeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot! The baddest evil genius-that's meeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot!'
….that thing was getting annoying. Frowning Perry grabbed Doof's hands and pulled them behind his back and held them there a couple of seconds. Doof had an odd sense of pain, and while this would be mildly annoying to most people, to Doof…
"AAAHHHH! OKAY OKAY I'LL TALK! THE KID REMEMBERED EVERYTHING AND WANTED TO ASK ME HOW EXACTLY THE INATOR WORKED! WILL YOU LET ME GO?! YOU'RE KILLING ME!"
Perry released him and sat there in shock. Carl remembered…everything? It explained his behavior at the OWCA for the past few days then...and why he wouldn't look at him when he turned the corner…but why had he been so horrified and desperate to get to a computer? Had the kid experienced a small and fleeting relapse of evil?
It took a couple of moments for Perry to realize that the annoying email alert song had stopped. Looking around, Perry noticed Doof sitting in a computer chair, hand holding his chin and staring at the screen thoughtfully. If this had anything to do with Carl…eyes narrowing, Perry approached the man
"krkrkrkrkrkrkrkrkr"
"Oh hey…Perry the Platypus? You're still here?"
Perry rolled his eyes and pointed at the computer screen.
"Oh. The email. It's from Rodney…well, it's his email. I'm just trying to decide if it's him having a heart attack and deciding to email me for some weird reason before kicking the bucket or if it's your intern having a panic attack. It's a tough call. I'm hoping for the former buuuuuut, I think it's your intern. What do you think Perry the Platypus? Rodney or Dr. Coconut?"
Perry gave him a deadpan look before walking away to grab a stool so he could actually see the screen. Once that task was accomplished, he read the email. Then read it again to make sure he wasn't missing anything
:ljflkajkljlksdjflakjdkjfalkf jdljfalkjfkhgoihowtohoghonbo aiojobalbjoije3ihgvablomvoje inbaljlgnoboajobnoboajobnolj flkajkljlksdjflakjdkjfalkfjd ljfalkjfkhgoihowtohoghonboai ojobalbjoije3ihgvablomvojein baljlgnboboajobnoboajobnoljf lkajkljlksdjflakjdkjfalkfjdl jfalkjfkhgoihowtohoghonboaio jobalbjoije3ihgvablomvojeinb aljlgnboboajobnoboajobnoljfl kajkljlksdjflakjdkjfalkfjdlj falkjfkhgoihowtohoghonboaioj obalbjoije3ihgvablomvojeinba ljlgnboboajobnoboajobnoljflk ajkljlksdjflakjdkjfalkfjdljf alkjfkhgoihowtohoghonboaiojo balbjoije3ihgvablomvojeinbal jlgnboboajobnoboajobnoljflka jkljlksdjflakjdkjfalkfjdljfa lkjfkhgoihowtohoghonboaiooba lbjoije3ihgvablomvojeinbaljl gnboboajobnoboajobnobourvclk brlkcclarjnljtljalkclkjarlkj opuejagoujrjbr:
"…"
"Yeeeeaaaaah, I think it's Dr. Coconut, I mean he hacked Rodney's account before which I thought was kind of weird when it looked like Rodney was asking about it. The inator I mean. I was like 'Wow. How did Rodney find out about this? Perry the Platypus didn't see it, no one saw it cuz I blew it up…turned out to be more trouble than it was worth you know? So I did some hacking myself…HEY! Don't give me that look! I am perfectly capable of doing some hacking to figure out why Rodney would be emailing me about an inator I didn't tell anyone about. So after an intense hacking battle, that kid really didn't want me to know who he was, I figured out who he was, well okay he admitted it, but I think I get points for figuring it wasn't Rodney in the first place."
"…"
"I GET POINTS!"
Scowling, Doofensmirtz turned back to the screen and began typing a reply : Kid, well, I think it's you kid. You could be Rodney having a heart attack, and if you are Rodney having a heart attack TOO BAD FOR YOU YOU BIG JERK! I TOLD YOU TO QUIT STUFFING YOUR FACE WITH MELINDA'S COOKING BUT DID YOU LISTEN? NO! THIS IS ALL ON YOU! But if it is you kid, mind slowing down on attacking the keyboard and actually asking a question I can read? I can't give you answers if I can't read your emails :
Barely a minute passed before 'The baddest evil genius-that's meeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot! The baddest evil genius-that's meeeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot! The baddest evil genius-that's meeeee-has got an email. Woot-Woot!'
"Great! He responded! And you thought my email alert song was useless Perry the Platypus"
Perry facepalmed as he watched Doof open the email so he could read it.
: ….yeah…it's me…I just…I'm really scared. Are there any side effects? Wait, why am I asking, you weren't hit by it. I-I think there are side effects to your evil-inator…I-I-I just lied didn't even think about it, it just happened, a-a-and they believed me because NON OF MY TICKS WHEN I LIE WENT OFF I SOUNDED EXACTLY LIKE I DO WHEN TELLING THE TRUTH! AM I GOING EVIL AGAIN? I DON'T WANT TO BE EVIL AGAIN! DJLFojlrjjflboejrOCJRTOEAJLV JLAJlvjajeojhbaorjbvmaoejajg boaOMVOAEJOGANBOEwo:
Perry stared at the screen. Poor kid was having a panic attack…and it was all Doof's fault!
"Heeeeeey Perry the Platypus, today's Tuesday right? Yeah…it's Tuesday…"
Doofensmirtz tapped his fingers on the desk before smiling brightly and nodding. "Yep. Tuesday. And tomorrow's Wednesday…"
: Hey kid. Think you can handle no answers today? I think I can better help you if we meet face to face, so you can, you know relax a little, have fun, and talk things out. See you at the Danville Bowling Alley at six. It's the one by the taco place next to the coffee place aboooout a block or two from the OWCA building. It's the only bowling alley in town but you know, I still get lost getting there WHEN I BOWL WITH VANESSA…I mean when I used to take Vanessa bowling…she doesn't like bowling anymore…well with me anyway…POINT IS BE THERE OR I TELL MONOBROW YOU'VE BEEN TALKING TO ME. So you know, we can relax. See ya there kid :) -Did ya see that? I made a smiley face. And an arrow. And he doesn't think I can be smart on the internet. I'm plenty smart….Anywaaaays. You better be there kid. Or I tell Monobrow :) LOOK I MADE ANOTHER ONE! AND IT LOOKS SO EEEEEEEVIL!:D OH AND LOOK ANOTHER ONE I AM ON FIRE WITH MAKING FACES!...Well not reeeaally on fire, but you get the point. See you tomorrow night :) :
Perry had barely finished reading what Doof had typed up as a response before he hit the send button. He couldn't believe that Doof was seriously planning on seeing and talking to Carl in person. It would only have a negative effect on the kid, maybe even push him further into a relapse!
"….You got THAT face again Perry the Platypus. Why? All I'm doing is helping the kid out. That means I should get a smile from you NOT a punch in the face"
"…"
"If you want, you can come too! To monitor things, even though nothing would happen. I mean sheesh, you are such a worrypus, you know that? A nosy worrypus."
Perry rolled his eyes before giving Doof a small nod. Carl should know that he could turn to anyone in the agency for help instead of asking someone evil…granted, Doof wasn't very high up on the 'evil' scale, but still.
Doofensmirtz gave him a huge smile "Great! I'm going to have to remember to bring my camera, this is going to be the BEST bowling night ever!"
Perry shook his head. Honestly, of all the evil scientists in the Tri-State-Area, he had to be assigned to the one scientist with the mentality of a four year old.
.
.
.
Carl had to reread Doofensmirtz's last email a couple of times. Bowling. Bowling. The guy was telling him to meet him at the local bowling alley to relax or else he'd tell Monogram about their chats….totally relaxing. As if he needed more stuff to worry about…but at least this worry was manageable. Show up at the bowling alley, get answers, leave. Monogram need never to know.
"Mrrrooooow"
Carl flinched slightly as slowly he turned his chair to face the agent, a tabby. Agent C from this morning.
As it had been earlier, the tabby's expression was an easy to understand question, 'What are you doing?'. He swallowed a little before giving the agent a confident smile. "Just checking my email…college stuff you know?"
Agent C gave him a doubtful look before shrugging. After all, as far as he knew, Carl was a terrible liar, even if he was acting strangely.
Carl waited till the agent had left the room before placing his head in his hands. Why? Why had he been the one zapped by the inator? Why did he have to remember everything? A-And what if there were worse side effects than lying, w-what if the inator that zapped him good again was wearing off? And him lying was the first hint of that.
He just didn't know….he didn't know anything about himself anymore….
.
.
.
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A/N: This story is surprisingly popular for some odd reason…a couple more follows and it'll be my second most popular story O_O …Scary.
