NB: This is chapter 4 and the last chapter, thank god!! Not sure I'm strong enough to write more than oneshots, but we shall see…I don't own anyone, except Rayleigh, who I now feel quite sorry for…
Chapter 4 – Confessions
The night garden in Til Amon had been specifically designed to ease minds which were troubled at night. The flowers in the garden released their fragrance constantly - clumps of sweet smelling jasmine and honeysuckle and white roses sat everywhere. The fountain was only pumped at night and was deliberately positioned so that it caught the light of the full moon every month and then glowed a resplendent silver. Even the garden itself was positioned far from houses and bars so that there was only a calming silence for the before mentioned struggling mind.
None
of this helped Maerad now, though. She sat on a stone bench under a
large willow tree, staring gloomily at the argent fountain and
inwardly cursing herself.
She should never have said Cadvan was
jealous. Even if it was true, she should never have said it. She knew
he was extremely guarded about that sort of thing...
And now perhaps she had lost even that small openness she did have with him.
The argument, she thought dismally, should never have happened. But how could she make it up with him now...?
She sighed aloud and brought her knees up to her chin, staring once more into the flowing, glowing fountain.
"I had a relationship with Nerili," said a low voice just behind her, making her jump. She whirled around in time to see Cadvan approach out of the shadows behind her and crouch down slowly in front of her.
"I had a relationship with Nerili," he repeated steadily. "But it was only for a few weeks."
Maerad immediately felt foolish.
"Cadvan - I - I don't want to - "
He placed his forefinger on her mouth to silence her, then continued.
"Nerili was the only person I had met who allowed the darkness to revel within her and still stayed strong. I thought she was like me. But I was wrong. It was a different darkness within her than was within me. Hers was a mild form of darkness - a defiance, a daring, a lack of rules, a Thoroldian darkness, if you will. But it was not the guilt-ridden darkness I had in myself and that was why, when I had to leave, she could not understand my decision. And so we split. I think of her now only with fondness."
He removed his finger from Maerad's mouth and she swallowed hard, feeling guilty.
"I don't want Rayleigh," she whispered finally, avoiding Cadvan's gaze. "I never did. I don't even like him that much - he's so shallow. And the kiss at the Meet was a mistake - I wish it had never happened."
She took in a quick breath, then continued.
"I just wanted to feel normal, Cadvan - just for a while - going out in the evening with boys like any other girl my age would - "
She bit her lip and looked away, and Cadvan reached forward and tenderly touched her chin with the tips of his fingers, tilting it so that she was looking at him again, even if it was through eyes blurred with tears.
"I apologise," he said gently. "I was too harsh with you about that."
"No, you were right." Maerad sniffed, then wiped her cheeks fiercely with her hands. "I am the One and I have to stop pretending that I am not."
"Well," Cadvan answered, half smiling, "I do want you to have a little fun."
Maerad glanced at him and suddenly a spark of her old mischieviousness was back in her eyes.
"Oh, I did," she said defiantly. "The other reason I went out with Rayleigh all the time was to make you jealous."
Cadvan grinned; he should have expected this to be her other motive. How childish he had been!
"It certainly worked," he said dryly.
"I noticed," she retorted playfully and smiled properly at him, her sorrow gone.
He stood up, feeling lighter than he had for days, and extended a hand to Maerad so that she could stand up also, which she accepted and bounced up quite cheerfully.
"So," Cadvan said. "Am I forgiven?"
Maerad eyed him for a moment, then said guardedly,
"Only if I am."
"You're forgiven," Cadvan answered promptly.
"Then so are you," Maerad declared and threw her arms around his neck in a tight embrace, which he returned, squeezing her shoulders warmly.
They stood in blissful silence for a moment, then Maerad whispered in Cadvan's ear,
"I think we have a problem."
"We do?" he queried, releasing her enough so that he could look her in the face, his arms still around her waist.
"Well," Maerad mused, twining her own arms more securely around his neck. "What sort of state will we both be in if I get jealous of every woman you see and you get jealous of every man I see?"
"I'll only get jealous if you kiss the man," Cadvan lied.
Maerad smiled slowly.
"Well, I'll get jealous if you even look at the woman."
Cadvan grinned.
"You're very possessive."
"Yes." Maerad leant closer to him. "I am."
They kissed, just once, just briefly, enough for one to feel the other's sweetness, then Cadvan pulled away and took her hand.
"Come on then, Trouble," he said fondly. "Before we both drop with exhaustion."
And they walked hand in hand out of the night garden, which once again resumed its normal peace, its work done for the night.
Hem noticed the change in the two the very next day. By the way that Maerad was holding onto Cadvan's arm and laughing at his comments, and completely ignoring any other boys around (especially Rayleigh - poor, lost Rayleigh), it was obvious the two had made up.
He said as much to Irc.
Thank the Light for that, said Irc. I don't think I could have borne another argument of theirs.
And - once again - Hem completely agreed with him.
The End!
You like? Then review! The whole thing turned out a bit soap-operay but people seemed to like that, so…(grins) see you next time!
