Disclaimer: I don't own Glee. All rights go to RIB and Fox. I also don't own RENT; all rights go to Jonathan Larson.

A/N: I know this has taken longer than it really should have but I've had mock exams and not much time to write. This chapter will involve the auditions for the school musical, a new love interest for Bianna and Nettie meeting her biological mother. I know this chapter is pretty long-one of the other reasons it's taken so long to write but that's just the amount the chapter seemed to need.

Chapter 4: Seasons of Love

Ivy's POV

I signed my name up for the school musical literally the day after I auditioned for Glee. I guess Finn decided to put the signup sheet out early since Ember blabbed the news about the musical around school. I've wanted to play the part of Joanne since I was eight years old and my mom took me to see it on Broadway. I figure this will be a great step to one day playing the role on a proper stage myself. Not that I've decided what I want to do yet. As long as it involves singing and I get to live in New York, I'll be happy.

Today's my audition and I'm really nervous. I can't not get this part. I need to show everyone that I have the potential to be as amazing as my mom or Rachel. That Ivy Evans is a star in the making.

"You all ready for your audition?" Mom asks when I go downstairs for breakfast.

"I think so" I say.

"What are you going to sing?" she asks.

"I was going to sing Take Me or Leave Me" I say.

"Not a good idea" Mom says.

"Why?" I ask.

"Because every single person auditioning for Joanne or Maureen is going to pick that song" she says.

"Then I guess I'll sing We're Okay" I say.

"I think you should do something that's not from Rent" Mom says.

"Why?" I ask.

"It shows that you'll bring a fresh interpretation to the role" she says.

"But this is just a school musical not a big Broadway production" I say.

"It doesn't matter. I think Finn will like it if you do something different" she says.

"But I've been practising Take Me or Leave Me for the whole week" I say.

"Just pick a song that you know really well and means something to you. Then you're bound to perform brilliantly" she says.

"What about Let It Go, from Frozen?" I ask.

"Perfect" she says kissing me on the forehead.

"Thanks Mom" I say.

"Good luck Vi. Hey what time's your audition, maybe I can come and watch?" she asks.

"I can't ask you to come Mom, I know you're busy working on your album" I say.

"But I want to see you knock your audition out the park" she says.

"I don't think it's open to parents anyway" I say. That's a lie, I know that some of the glee kids parents are coming to watch but the truth is I don't want my mom there. Whilst I love her, I would feel way too much pressure if my mom was there watching me. She must know this because I can see the hurt look in her eyes.

"Never mind then. Just let me know how it goes okay?" she says.

"Of course I will. Love you Mom" I say hugging her.

"Love you too sweetheart. Good luck today" she says.

"Thanks Mom" I say swinging my backpack over my shoulder and running to catch the bus as it reaches the corner of my street.

My days at school are always the same really. No one likes to be around me so I spend most of my time alone. I don't care really. I have to focus on my music and keeping my grades up so I can get into a prestigious performing arts college in New York.

The auditions for RENT are taking place at lunchtime in the auditorium. Finn separates us out into groups of whose auditioning for which part. The only person auditioning for Mimi is Bianna Lopez-Pierce, but there are several girls auditioning for Maureen and two other girls auditioning for Joanne are Emberly Hudson and Mandy Puckerman. I know I can sing better than Mandy Puckerman but why did Ember have to be auditioning? She's Finn's daughter, of course he's going to give the part to her. The guys auditioning are mainly the theatre geeks but that's no surprise. No jock's going to be seen in the school musical, even if some of them are in Glee.

"Okay, guys, I'm really happy so many of you decided to audition today. As Bianna is the only one auditioning for Mimi and I've seen her perform already, she has the part but I'd like the rest of "Okay, guys, I'm really happy so many of you decided to audition today. As Bianna is the only one auditioning for Mimi and I've seen her perform already, she has the part but I'd like the rest of you to perform your audition piece and then I'm going to split you into pairs and you're going to read from a scene in the play. Everyone okay with that?" Finn says.

We all nod. "Ivy how about you sing first?" he asks.

"Sure Mr Hudson" I say.

"What are you going to sing?" he asks.

"The Demi Lovato version of Let It Go from Frozen" I say.

"That's a great song-dare to be different and not choose something from the musical, I like it" Finn says.

"Thanks" I say.

"Let's hear it then" he says. I step into the centre of the stage and start to sing.

Ivy:

Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go

Turn my back and slam the door

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight,

Not a footprint to be seen.

A kingdom of isolation and it looks like I'm the queen

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside

Couldn't keep it in, heaven knows I've tried.

Don't let them in, don't let them see,

Be the good girl you always had to be.

Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know.

Well now they know.

Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go

Turn my back and slam the door

And here I stand, and here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

The cold never bothered me anyway

It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small

And the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all.

Up here in the cold thin air I finally can breathe.

I know I left a life behind but I'm too relieved to grieve.

Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go

Turn my back and slam the door

And here I stand, and here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

The cold never bothered me anyway

Standing frozen

In the life I've chosen.

You won't find me.

The past is all behind me

Buried in the snow.

Let it go, let it go

Can't hold it back anymore

Let it go, let it go

Turn my back and slam the door

And here I'll stand, and here I'll stay

Let it go, let it go

The cold never bothered me anyway, yeah, whoa

(Na na, na na, na na na na)

(Na na, na na, na na na na)

(Na na, na na, na na na na)

(Na na, na na, na na na na)

Let it go, yeah

Na, na.

Here I stand.

Let it go, let it go, oh

Let it go.

I hold the last note for as long as I possibly can and then I smile. I know I've completely nailed it.

"That was amazing Ivy. You guys are going to have to do pretty well to beat that" he says nodding at Emberly and Mandy.

"Please, I'm Rachel Hudson's daughter, I can knock you out of the park any day" I say to Ivy.

"Well I love the confidence Ember. Would you like to go next?" Finn asks.

"Sure thing Dad" she says. Damn she has an annoying sense of self confidence. Still after that audition, I'm pretty sure no one will beat me. Ember may be the daughter of Rachel Hudson, but I'm the daughter of Mercedes Jones.

Emberly's POV

Before school, I go to the Lima Bean. Jesse and I have started to meet up regularly since our first meeting last Thursday. I don't know when he's heading back to New York but I'm definitely going to make the most of him being here. I know my dad hates him because he dated my mom, but I think he's great. He's given me advice about singing and even about clothes-I didn't realise guys knew anything about that kind of thing. I'm wearing a new outfit today, black skinny jeans, grey ankle boots and a black & white stripy sweater that I picked on his advice to look more grown up.

"Hi Jesse" I say when I meet him at our booth in the coffee shop. He's drinking his usual cinnamon espresso. There's another cup on the table in front of him. I assume it's for me so I pick it up and take a sip.

"Hot chocolate with whipped cream and marshmallows-you remembered my drink order" I say.

"What can I say? I have a good memory" he says.

"How are your parents?" I ask.

"They're good" he says.

"Do they know about me?" I ask.

"They do. They've never really been interested though-not meaning to sound rude or anything. They're just…..very traditional types and the fact that I have a daughter with someone that I'm not married to is hard for them. They kind of think that since you've been adopted, there's no point in them getting to know you" he says.

"Oh" I say.

"Their words not mine. I'm bringing them around to the idea" he says.

"And you haven't had any offers for work yet?" I ask.

"Not yet. I'm planning on sticking around here for a while anyway. Spend some time with you and with my parents. This is the first break I've had in a while" he says.

"Have you ever done RENT?" I ask.

"Actually that's one of the musicals I've never been in. Why?" he asks.

"I'm auditioning for the school musical and Dad's chosen to do RENT this year, that's all. I was wondering if you could give me some tips" I say.

"Well you want to pick a song that will highlight the strengths of your voice and hide any weaknesses, though you're my daughter so I'm sure you don't have any" he says.

"That is very true" I say. He laughs.

"Nothing like a high level of self-confidence" he says.

"I can't decide which song to sing, La Vie Boheme or Tango: Maureen" I say.

"I don't think you should do a RENT song" he says.

"Why not?" I ask.

"You'll show more passion and emotion in a song that really means something to you. Your favourite musical is Jekyll and Hyde right?" he says.

"Right" I say.
"So choose a song from that musical that means something to you" he says.

"I think I know which one I'm going to do. No One Knows Who I am-I loved watching Mom sing that on the videos she has, and I don't know, I guess I kind of understand the feeling" I say.

"How come?" he asks.

"I always feel like I'm acting-not that I mind, I love acting but it would be nice if people knew who was behind the actress" I say.

"Well then you've found your song. The most important thing for any audition is to have a connection with the song" he says.

"So what song do you use for auditions?" I ask.

"It changes depending on the part I'm auditioning for" he says.

"Do you have a favourite?" I ask.

"Audition song?" he asks.

"No, just song in general" I say.

"Hello by Lionel Richie. It was the first duet I ever sang with your mom" he says.

"I'd like to come see you in a show sometime" I say quickly changing the subject. It makes me feel awkward when he talks about his feelings for my mom. I could never imagine her with anyone but my dad.

"I'm sure your mom's taken you to see thousands of Broadway shows" he says.

"She has but I'd like to see you in one. I mean I've seen you perform on her tape of your performance in Jekyll and Hyde but I'd like to see you live" I say.

"Well once I've found another show to do, maybe you could come out to New York and see me" he says.

"That would be great" I say.

"Well let me know how the audition goes" he says.

"I can do better than that. Why don't you come with me?" I ask.

"Ember, that's not a good idea. Your dad still hates me, I can guarantee it will not end well if I turn up at your school" he says.

"But you haven't heard me sing yet and I really want you to. Please?" I beg.

"Ember the only way this is going to work is if you keep our relationship secret. Neither your dad or your mom would be very happy with you being in contact with me" he says.

"They don't mind me emailing Kym" I say.

"That's different" he says.

"Why?" I ask.

"Because your dad and I have a rather unpleasant history" he says.

"I know you were mom's ex and everything, but why does my dad hate you so much?" I ask.

"It's a long story" he says.

"We have a little time before I have to get to school" I say.

"Your dad's probably told you most of it" he says.

"He told me that you broke my mom's heart" I say.

"That part's true. But I loved her. Part of me still does I guess" he says.

"Is that why my dad hates you?" I ask.

"He hates me because I was a selfish ass when I was younger. I chose winning a glee club competition over your mom and it was the worst decision I ever made. I treated everyone around me like they were lesser than me because I knew I was going to be a big star someday and they weren't, including your dad. But I think he really hates me just because he didn't like to think anyone else could have your mom's heart" he says.

"But it's been years. Surely he's got over his whole jealousy thing by now" I say.

"Why should he? I haven't. No matter how much I know Rachel loves Finn, how much she always has and I was never going to be the one for her, it still hurts when I see them together" he says.

"But I thought you were in love with Kym?" I ask.

"People can love more than one person you know" he says.

"So what are you doing about it?" I ask.

"No and I'm not going to" he says.

"I kind of already have" I admit.

"Emberly Hudson, what did you do?" he asks.

"I may have mentioned in passing in one of our email conversations that you missed her and wanted to talk to her about something. Her theatre troop is doing a tour of Ohio at the moment and she's coming down to Lima next weekend to see you. And me, I guess but mainly you" I say.

"You should have asked me first" he says.

"I can tell her you won't see her if you'd like" I say.

"No don't do that" he says quickly. A secret smile creeps across my face. I could be good at this matchmaker thing after all.

I check the time on my watch. "I need to get to school. Are you sure you don't want to come to see my audition?" I ask.

"I just don't think it would be good for anyone" he says.

"Well if you change your mind, auditions are in the auditorium at twelve" I say.

"I'll remember that. Same time tomorrow?" he asks.

"I'll see you then" I say smiling. I've loved getting to know Jesse over the past few days although it sucks that I have to keep it a secret from my mom and dad.

The first few lessons at school drag by so slowly. All I want to do is get to my audition and blow my dad away. I'll get this part because I'm a star and I'm perfect for it, not because I'm the director's daughter. I've played many roles in community theatre but I've never been in RENT or played a lesbian role before.

At lunch I literally rush out of my classroom to ensure that I'm the first one at the auditions. I take a look around to see who the other girls auditioning for Joanne are. Mandy Puckerman and Ivy Evans. Mandy shouldn't be a problem, I could sing better than her any day but Ivy might be. For a little girl, she's got a huge voice. She goes first, and even I, albeit very grudgingly have to admit that she killed that song.

"That was amazing Ivy. You guys are going to have to do pretty well to beat that" my dad says looking over at me and Mandy Puckerman.

"Please I'm Rachel Hudson's daughter. I can knock you out of the park any day" I say to Ivy. It's true of course, but I can't help but feel a little nervous. She really did sing that song well. I just have to let the emotion come through my song and I'm sure it will have just as much wow factor though, I'm sure.

I close my eyes and imagine that Jesse is there watching me sing as I start my song.

Emberly:

Look at me,

And tell me who I am.

Why I am.

What I am.

Call me a fool,

And it's true I am.

I don't know

Who I am.

It's such a shame.

I'm such a sham.

No one knows who I am.

Am I the face of the future?

Am I the face of the past?

Am I the one who must finish last?

Look at me,

And tell me who I am,

Why I am.

What I am.

Will I survive?

Who will give a damn,

If no one knows

Who I am?

Nobody knows-

Not even you-

No one knows who I am….

I open my eyes and when I look into the wings Jesse is really there. I blink, just to make sure I'm not imagining it. My dad looks like he has tears in his eyes.

"Are you okay dad?" I ask.

"You just reminded me so much of your mom when you sang that" he says.

"So I got the part then? If I sounded like mom then I must be the best singer. Not that it's debatable anyway" I say.

"No need to be cocky Ember, all of the girls auditioning are good singers. But you did a nice job" Dad says. I try hard not to glare at him. He knows I'm the best here; he just doesn't want to show favourites, I remind myself. I start to walk to the edge of the stage.

"You're not storming out are you Ember?" Dad asks.

"No, I just need to use the restroom" I lie.

"Okay well don't be long, I'll need you back here to read your scene" he says.

"I'll be ten minutes tops" I say walking off stage. Jesse and I walk out into the halls so no one can hear us.

"I'm glad you came" I say.

"I'm glad too. Your voice is stunning. Not in quite the same league as your mom's but stunning all the same. You picked the perfect song" he says.

"You helped" I say, for once not wanting to take all the credit.

"You know you're wasted at a school like this" he says.

"I know I'm ten times more talented than most of the kids in this school yes. But this is Ohio, the performing art schools aren't exactly New York standard" I say.

"Then maybe you should come to New York" he says.

"Are you serious?" I ask.

"Completely" he says.

"Mom and Dad would never go for it" I say.

"They wouldn't go for you trying to further your career?" he asks.

"No, they wouldn't go for me going to a performing arts high school in New York. They'd probably let me go to the school Mom teaches at but not New York" I say.

"You need the best Ember, and New York Performing Arts High Schools are the best in the country" he says.

"Where would I live? I can't exactly commute from Ohio to New York" I say.

"Well I guess you'd live with me. I could introduce you to some of my Broadway contacts, it would really help your career" he says.

"My dad wouldn't go for that" I say.

"What really matters to you more Ember, your career or what your dad thinks of it?" he asks.

"I've only known you for less than a week Jesse; I can't decide to move to an entirely different state with someone I barely know, even if you are my dad. Besides I'm not entirely sure how I feel about leaving my parents" I say.

"Well you think about it. You're a talented kid Ember, I'd hate to see that go to waste in a school that can't make the most of your talents" he says.

"It means a lot to me that you came" I say.

"My curiosity got the better of me; I wanted to hear how amazing my daughter's voice was. But you'd better get back otherwise your dad is going to wonder what's been taking you so long" he says.

"Thanks for coming. I'll see you and Kym next weekend" I say giving him a hug.

"You still owe me for that one" he says.

"Drinks on me next time we go to The Lima Bean?" I say.

"Sure" he laughs. I give him a hug and we go our separate ways.

"Are you alright Ember?" my dad asks when I get back to the auditorium.

"Yeah, why?" I ask.

"You were just gone for a while that's all" he says.

"I ran into one of my teachers on the way back from the restroom, they wanted to talk to me about some work" I say.

"Okay" Dad says but he doesn't look like he believes me. I'm going to have to come up with some better excuses.

"So how about we switch things up a little and have a Maureen audition next? Marie would you like to go next?" Dad asks.

"Sure Mr Hudson" she says. In vocal terms, I wish Ivy was going out for Maureen instead of Joanne as our voices would kill together but I suppose a Maureen with a lesser voice would allow me to shine more.

Marie's POV

It's the day after my glee audition and I've just come back from our first rehearsal. Dave is coming over for math tutoring and for some reason, I'm really nervous. I shouldn't be; I mean we were flirting with each other a lot yesterday and he clearly likes me.

"Marie, there's a David O'Connor here to see you" my mom calls up the stairs.

"Coming" I call, rushing down the stairs.

"Who is he?" she whispers into my ear.

"A friend from school" I say.

"Are you sure he's just a friend?" she asks.

"Yes. I'm tutoring him in Math" I say.

"Well keep your bedroom door open okay?" Mom says.

"We're just friends mom" I say.

"Well if you're just friends then you won't mind keeping the door open will you?" Mom says.

"No I guess not. Come on Dave, my room's this way" I say taking his hand and leading him upstairs.

"So what do you want to start with?" I ask him, carefully pulling the door closed but leaving a small gap so my mom doesn't yell at me for fully shutting it.

"I don't know, I guess more equations. I really suck at them" he says.

"I told you, I've had far worse students than you before" I say.

"Can you help me with this week's homework problems then?" he asks handing me a sheet.

"Sure, these all look pretty straightforward" I say.

"Seriously? Are we looking at the same thing? I hate all these stupid wordy problems" he says.

"Well let's just try the first one. So for a math project, 26 students were divided into four groups. Two groups had the same number of students; the other two groups each had one more student than the smaller groups. How many students were in the smaller group?" I read.

"So what do I do? I don't know about you but I don't get anything from that." he says.

"Okay so we'll say the four groups are G1, G2, G3 & G4. The four groups added together equal 26 so write down G1+G2+G3+G4=26. That's right" I say watching him write the problem down.

"G1 and G2 have the same number of students, so we'll say they have x students" I say and he writes down what I say.

"Then what?" he asks.

"Well G3 and G4 have one more student than G1 and G2 so how many students does that mean they have?" I ask.

"x + 1" he says.

"Exactly. So how do we work out, how many students are in the smaller group?" she asks.

"It's x + x+x+1+x+1=26" he says.

"That's right. So how do we simplify it?" I say.

"x+4+2?" he asks.

"Not quite. You need to times the x's together. So what do you get if you do that?" I ask.

"4x + 2" he says.

"Exactly. So that means 4x + 2=26. So how do we get to what x equals?" I ask.

"Divide it by four" he says.

"Not quite yet. We need to get x on its own first. How do we do that?" I ask.

"Subtract the 2" he says.

"Well done. So what do we get if we do that?" I ask.

"4x=24" he says.

"Okay so how do we get x on its own?" I ask.

"Divide it by 4" he says.

"So what does x equal?" I ask.

"6" he says.

"See, you've found how many students were in the smaller group. You can do the math, Dave, you just can't be put off by the words" I say.

"So what's next?" he asks.

"The next problem on the sheet. And we're going to work through all of them until you're done" I say.

"Wow, I never knew you were such a slave driver" he says.

"I might have given you a discount but I still want to get my money's worth out of you" I say smacking him gently on the shoulder.

"Okay so the next question says, "When she graduated from college Regina was offered two jobs. One paid a starting salary of $30,000 annually, plus guaranteed increases of $2,000 per year" he says.

"So what's the equation?" I ask.

"S1=30000 + 2000x" he says.

"Very good. What's the next part of the problem?" I ask.

"The other paid a starting salary of $25,000 annually, plus guaranteed increases of $3,000 per year" he says.

"And the equation is?"

"S2=25000 + 3000x" he says.

"See you can do it. So what's the overall equation?" I ask.

"I'm not sure" he says.

"Yes you are; you just doubt yourself. You need to work out how long it will take before the salaries equal so….." I say.

"The equations need to be equal?" he says hesitantly.

"Yes! So how do you do that?" I ask.

"S1=S2" he says.

"You need to write out the actual equations though as well" I point out.

"So 30000+2000x=25000 + 3000x" he says.

"That's exactly it. So how do we get the x's on their own?" I say.

"Take the 30,000 away from the 25,000" he says.

"Which leaves you with?" I ask.

"5,000" he says.

"Exactly. And the x's?" I ask.

"Take the 2000x away" he says.

"And that leaves you with?" I ask.

"1000x=5000" he says.

"So what does x equal?" I ask.

"5000/1000 so x=5" he says.

"See you're not half bad at this whole equation thing"

"I have a great teacher" he says, doing that cute half smile of his.

"We're here to work and we've still got the rest of this page of problems to do. Save your flirting for afterward" I say.

We work through the problems for the next hour or so and he's getting pretty good by the end of it.

"I'm starving. We're done with the problems, maybe we could go for some dinner?" he asks.

"Sure. We could go to that piano jazz bar I was telling you about yesterday" I say.

"Sounds great" he says.

"Mom we're going out!" I call as we walk downstairs together.

"Where?" she asks.

"To The Blue Wisp" I say.

"In Cincinnati? I don't think so Marie. You'll get back far too late" she says.

"Please Mom? Dave really likes jazz and he's new to Ohio, so I may as well take him to the best jazz place in the state" I say.

"I'm not sure I want you driving back from Cincinnati late at night" Mom says.

"Mom can I talk to you for a minute?" I ask dragging her into the living room.

"What do you want Marie?" she asks.

"You have to let me go. I really like this guy okay?" I say.

"So this is a date?" she asks.

"Sort of" I say coyly.

"I thought you said he was just your friend?" she asks.

"He is. For now" I say.

"Meaning you want something more?" she asks.

"I don't know; I only met him yesterday. But maybe, yeah, I'd like for there to be something more between us. He's cute and probably the nicest guy I've ever met" I say.

"Alright but if you are back any later than eleven then your dad will kill you" she says.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you" I say hugging her.

"Dad not you?" I ask.

"What can I say? Your dad is way better at playing bad cop" she says laughing.

"We can go now" I say to Dave, walking back into the kitchen with my mom following me.

"11 o'clock sharp, remember" Mom says.

"Of course" I say, walking to the car with Dave.

"Should we take my car?" he asks.

"Mine's perfectly fine isn't it?" I reply.

"It is, but if this is a first date then I should drive" he says.

"So is it our first date?" I ask.

"I'd like it to be if you would" he says.

"Let's take your car then" I say.

"Alright" he says smiling.

He opens my car door for me.

"Who knew you were such a gentleman?" I say.

"Now you do" he says, the cute smile appearing on his face again.

"So how do you know about this place?" he asks.

"Blue Wisp? I'm one of their regulars" I say.

"What regular customers?" he asks.

"No regular performers. The pay's pretty good and it's great practice performing to a crowd. I haven't decided what I want to do yet, but it will probably involve performing" I say.

"I've known what I wanted to do since I was a little kid" he says.

"What's that?" I ask.

"Hockey. I'm going to play for the Toronto Maple Leafs" he says.

"Who are they?" I ask.

"One of the teams in the NHL. They were a great team, they won thirteen Stanley Cups and five division championships but they haven't done so well recently. But when I'm on the team, that's all going to change" he says.

"I'm sorry; you're talking to a hockey virgin here. What is the NHL? Or the Stanley Cup?" I ask.

"The NHL is the National Hockey League in Canada and the Stanley Cup is the trophy that the winning teams get if they win the Stanley Cup finals" he says.

"That may as well have been Spanish for all I understood it" I say.

"You should come watch a game at my house sometime" he says.

"Sounds good. I've never seen hockey before" I say.

"Really?" he asks.

"It's not really as big a thing in Ohio as it is in Canada" I say.

"The regular season doesn't start till October, but I'll let you know when the first game of the season is on and you can come watch it with me and my brothers" he says.

"I'd like that. Maybe you could teach me to play?" I ask.

"Hockey?" he asks.

"Yeah. I'd like to see what makes you Canadians so nuts about it" I say.

"Okay, I'll teach you. You do know how to skate right?" he asks.

"Yeah, I know how to skate" I say laughing.

"Just checking" he says.

"So what are your brothers' names? You never told me yesterday" I say.

"My older brother is Jamie and my younger brother is Harry. How about your sister?" he asks.

"Her name's Maddie" I say.

"Am I going the right way? I've never been to Cincinnati before" he says.

"Yeah just keep following the signs" I say.

We drive for a little longer, mainly arguing about our favourite jazz musicians & comparing our favourite sports.

"So you say you perform at this place? What's your usual set?" he asks.

"A little Nina Simone, some Amy Winehouse, some Sinatra, some Ella Fitzgerald, Etta James, I basically do a bit of all good jazz singers" I say.

"What about Joni Mitchell?" he asks.

"I do some covers of her songs too. I wouldn't have taken you for a Joni Mitchell fan" I say.

"I'm pretty easy to please. If it's jazz music I like it" he says.

"How come you're so into jazz?" I ask.

"My parents loved it. It reminds me of them" he says, his voice cracking a little.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked" I say.

"It's okay, I like talking about them. I feel like if I don't then I might forget about them one day or something. It's stupid" he says.

"It's not stupid at all. So what were their names?" I ask.

"Cameron and Maya O'Connor. They grew up next door to each other in London but Mom moved to Calgary when she was 12. They didn't see each other for years but they ended up at the University of Calgary together. They fell in love and the rest is kind of history" he says.

"That's a really sweet story" I say.

"Too bad it doesn't have a happy ending" he says.

"The sad fact of life is that no sweet story has a happy ending" I say.

"They were driving to my high school concert in a blizzard…." he says.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to" I say.

"No I do. My dad couldn't see anything through the windscreen, not even the drunk driver that rammed them from behind. They died instantly. I kept looking for them through the concert, and I was so mad because I thought they'd forgotten about it. I felt terrible when I saw my brother with the policeman afterward and he told us they were dead. The last thought I had about my parents was that they didn't care about me" he says. He looks as if he's tearing up a little.

"I'm glad you felt you could tell me that" I say placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I haven't talked to anyone about it before" he admits. We sit in comfortable silence for a while.

"Turn in here" I say pointing to the turning for the Blue Wisp. He opens my door for me again.

"Why thank you kind sir" I say kissing his hand.

"This place is incredible" he says as we walk into the restaurant. Blue Wisp does have a great vibe on a Friday night; jazz music fills the room, alongside the low level chatter of customers.

"Marie, so nice to see you. Who's your friend?" the waiter Mario asks me when I walk in with Dave. I've been coming to this place for years, so all the wait staff know me.

"This is Dave O'Connor. He loves jazz music, so I thought I'd bring him to the best place in the state" I say.

"Will you be performing tonight?" he asks.

"Well I'm not technically on the clock tonight but if you'd let us then we'd love to" I say.

"Wait us?" Dave asks.

"Yeah. If I perform, you're damn well going to perform with me" I say.

"Don't bother trying to argue. There's no changing her mind once it's made up" Mario says laughing.

"I'm starting to figure that out" Dave says, laughing.

"I'll take you to your usual table then shall I, Marie?" Mario asks.

"If it's free then that would be great Mario" I say.

He leads us a table in the back of the restaurant that my family usually sits at when we come here.

"Do you know what you want?" Mario asks.

"We'll have an order of the spaghetti and meatballs please Mario" I say. He nods and walks back to the kitchen.

"You do like spaghetti and meatballs right?" I ask.

"I do" he says.

"It's my favourite dish on the menu" I say.

"Well you're the expert about this place, so I'm sure it will be great" he says.

"Did you ever go to any jazz restaurants in Ontario?" I ask him.

"I went to the East Village Coffeehouse with my friends sometimes but we mainly hung out at Tim Horton's" he says.

"The doughnut place?" I ask.

"And here I was thinking you knew nothing about Canada"

"Well there are some Tim Hortons' in the US too" I admit.

Our food comes quite quickly and we don't stop talking at all-he tells me all about Canada and the cool places he went to with his mom who was an anthropologist and studied tribes all over the world. I'm sure I must seem pretty boring compared to him. After we eat our dessert, I take his hand and lead him over to the stage where the piano is.

"What are we doing?" he asks.

"I told you earlier that we were going to sing" I say.

"Do we really have to? In front of all these people?" he asks.

"Are you a chicken or are you going to come sing with me?" I taunt.

"No it's fine. I'll sing. What song do you want to do?" he asks.

"I was thinking Fever by Peggy Lee. Do you know it?" I ask.

"Of course" he says.

"Good" I say. I tell Mario what song we'll be singing and he introduces us to the crowd.

"Ladies and gentleman if you'll turn your attention to the stage one of our regular performers Marie Puckerman and her friend Dave O'Connor will be performing a duet of Peggy Lee's ' 'Fever'" Mario says.

I start to play the first chords of the song, singing as I do.

Marie:

Never know how much I love you

Never know how much I care

When you put your arms around me

I get a fever that's so hard to bear

(Dave comes and sits on the piano stool next to me)

Dave:

You give me fever

When you kiss me

Fever when you hold me tight

Fever! In the morning

Fever all through the night

(He takes my hand and leads me to the centre of the stage. He puts an arm around my waist and we dance together around the piano).

Marie:

Sun lights up the daytime

Moon lights up the night

I light up when you call my name

And you know I'm gonna treat you right

Dave:

You give me fever

When you kiss me

Fever when you hold me tight

Fever! In the morning

Fever all through the night

Marie:

Everybody's got the fever

That is something you all know

Fever isn't such a new thing

Fever started long ago

Dave:

Romeo loved Juliet

Juliet, she felt the same

When he put his arms around her

He said, "Julie baby you're my flame

Thou giveth fever

When we kisseth

Fever with thy flaming youth

Fever! I'm afire

Fever, yeah, I burn forsooth"

Marie:

Cap'n Smith and Pocahontas

Had a very mad affair

When her daddy tried to kill him

She said, "Daddy oh don't you dare"

"He gives me fever

With his kisses

Fever when he holds me tight

Fever! I'm his missus

Daddy won't you treat him right?"

Dave:

Now you've listened to my story

Here's the point that I have made

Chicks were born to give you fever

Be it Fahrenheit or Centigrade

Marie:

They give you fever

When you kiss them

Fever if you live and learn

Fever! Till you sizzle

Dave:

What a lovely way to burn

Marie:

What a lovely way to burn

Dave:

What a lovely way to burn

Both:

What a lovely way to burn

At the end of the song he throws me onto the grand piano and before I can ask him what he's doing, he's kissing me. I'm shocked at first but I don't pull away. I kiss him back furiously.

"Do you lovebirds want some privacy?" Mario says jokingly. My cheeks flush bright red and Dave helps me off the piano.

We pay our bill and he leads me back to the car. We're silent for a while and I wonder if he's being awkward with me now because I'm a bad kisser. I hope that's not it. Our kiss was as good as I imagined it when I first met her.

"Was our kiss bad? Is that why you're not talking to me?" I ask.

"Are you kidding? That was one of the best damn kisses I've ever had" he says.

"So why are you acting all weird?" he says.

"I thought you might think it was too soon for me to be kissing you" he says.

"I've had a crush on you from the moment I met you. Believe me, I so could have done that yesterday" he says. It seems strange, but I feel like I've opened myself up more to a guy I've known for two days than anyone else in my entire life and I can see in his eyes that he feels the same way. We sing along to Dave's jazz records all the way home. He said only sings a little, but I would guess he'd had some singing lessons when he was younger.

"Did you have singing lessons when you were younger?" I ask him.

"No, just some when I was at school. Why?" he asks.

"You just have a really nice voice" I say.

"My mom used to love music and she made sure that we all loved it too" he says wistfully.

"You should join our school glee club" I say.

"What's a glee club?" he asks.

"We meet every week and sing together. We compete too, in show choir competitions" I say.

"I'll think about it" he says.

"We could sing duets just like the one we sang tonight" I say.

"Well singing with a beautiful girl that I like doesn't sound half bad" he says.

We pull into my driveway. "11 o'clock sharp-as promised" he says.

"Thank you for an amazing first date" I say.

"It's me who should be thanking you. You were the one who suggested going to The Blue Wisp" he says.

"Maybe we could make that a regular thing" I suggest.

"I'd love that. What nights do you perform?" he asks.

"Usually on Saturdays and Sundays" I say.

"I'll come and see you perform sometime" he says.

"I'd love that. But remember you promised to let me hear you play your sax sometime to" I say.

"I'll bring it when we have our tutoring session next week" he says.

"That reminds me, you owe me my $5 for the hour I spent tutoring you tonight" I say.

"Yes mam" he says pulling a $5 bill out of his pocket.

"Call me okay?" I say.

"Oh I definitely will" he says kissing me again.

"Goodnight David O'Connor" I say.

"Goodnight Marie Puckerman" he says. I smile to myself as I close the door and go back into the house.

"How did your date go sweetheart?" Mom asks.

"Good. Really good actually" I say.

"So you'll be seeing him again?" she asks.

"Well I'm his math tutor but yes, I will be seeing him again, in a romantic way" I say.

"That's great Marie. He'd better be good to you though, or your dad will be after him" she says.

"He will be. Dad has nothing to worry about" I say.

"Well go on, then tell me all about your date" she says. I settle onto the couch next to her and we spend most of the night having a girly gossip.

My audition for RENT is the Monday after my date with Dave. I was going to sing a song from the musical but after Friday night, I decided I want to do something romantic in honour of Dave. He won't be there, since I didn't tell him about my audition but I feel in the mood for singing those kinds of songs. The auditions aren't until lunchtime and I'm driving myself crazy during the first few periods of the day, running over my audition song over and over in my head.

I have to wait until Ivy and Emberly have already auditioned before it's my turn.

"So how about we switch things up and have a Maureen audition next? Marie would you like to go next?" Mr Hudson asks.

"Sure Mr Hudson" I say walking out into the centre of the stage. I am about to sing when I hear the door to the auditorium open. I look up and see Dave walking in. I can't believe this, how did he know about my audition? Still this is great, now he actually gets to hear the song I planned for him.

I smile over at him and he flashes me his cute grin. I take my seat behind the piano and start to play and sing.

Marie:

Hold me close and hold me fast

The magic spell you cast

This is la vie en rose

When you kiss me heaven sighs

And though I close my eyes

I see la vie en rose

When you press me to your heart

I'm in a world apart

A world where roses bloom

And when you speak

Angels sing from above

Everyday words seems

To turn into a love song

Give your heart and soul to me

And life will always be la vie en rose

"That was really nice Marie. Such a different song choice from Emberly and Ivy. What made you decide to go with that song?" Mr Hudson says.

"I chose it for a special someone" I say blushing.

"Well he's a very lucky guy" Mr Hudson says.

"Speaking of my special someone Mr Hudson, he's sitting behind you, do you mind if I go and talk to him?" I say.

He laughs. "Go ahead Marie. But be back soon, we still have more people and the chemistry tests to do" he says.

"Don't worry, I'll be fast Mr Hudson" I say.

I walk out into the hall with Dave and give him a big hug.

"What was that for?" he asks.

"You came to my audition. I didn't even tell you when it was" I say.

"A little birdie told me" he says.

"Maddie?" I say.

"How'd you know?" he asks.

"You're new here and you don't know any of my friends, so I figured you had to have heard it from someone in my family. My mom wouldn't have called you; neither would my dad so it had to be Maddie. I'll have to thank her later" I say.

"Your song was beautiful" he says.

"I'm glad you liked it. I can sing the French version as well" I say.

"Just when I think I know everything about you, I find there's something new. You can sing in French?" he asks.

"Yeah. I actually speak fluent French. We lived in France for a year when I was nine" I say.

"You lived in France?" he asks.

"Yeah, my dad spent a year as part of a French dance troupe. It was amazing, living in Paris for a year. Ohio seemed a lot more boring after we came home. But you must speak French, isn't that one of the national languages of Canada?" I ask.

"I come from Ontario, the main place they speak French in Canada is Quebec. I speak a little, but I'm not fluent" he says.

"I could tutor you in French as well as Math" I say.

"Let's just stick to the Math for now" he says.

"So other than telling me how amazing I sounded and that you loved the song I dedicated to you was there anything else you wanted to ask me?" I say.

"Yes actually. I realised that I never officially asked you for a second date last night" he says.

"That's right you didn't" I say.

"So Marie Puckerman, will you come out on a second date with me? As long as you remember that you have to pick the place since I don't know anywhere around here" he says.

I laugh a little at the last bit. "Yes, David O'Connor, I would love to go on a second date with you" I say.

"I actually got something for you. It's kind of weirdly perfect that you chose the song you did, because…." he says bringing a red rose out from behind his back.

"It's beautiful" I say.

"Just like you" he says, making me smile because it's such a cliché response but still so cute.

He tucks the flower behind my ear and I kiss him.

"Saturday night sound good for our second date?" I ask.

"Sounds perfect" he says.

"I have to get back in there but I'll see you tomorrow in math class right?" I say.

"Unless you're planning on going somewhere and I seriously hope you aren't because otherwise I won't understand a word Mr Wilkes says" he says.

"I'll be there" I say.

"So will I" he says. I kiss him again and then we walk our separate ways, him to his next class and me back to the auditions, with the biggest grin on my face. I have a second date with Dave O'Connor!

Mandy's POV

I'm kind of confused about my feelings for Mandy Lopez-Pierce. I mean yes I was little freaked out when her alter-ego Kara just came onto me like that but I'd be lying if I said I hadn't noticed her before yesterday. It's just so strange, I mean I know I like guys but I still have these feelings for Mandy and they're more than just friendly. I wasn't really angry when she tried to kiss me, just shocked. I actually wouldn't have minded finding out what kissing her was like. The whole multiple personality thing is a little weird though. I know it's not her fault or anything and I feel really bad that I feel like this. She doesn't seem to mind though. Maybe she's used to it, I don't know.

I don't really know Mandy that well. I mean Bianna and Ty I've known since I was a little kid but Mandy only moved in with them when she was ten and whenever my mom and her old friends from Glee have met up, Mandy's always been the quiet one in the corner reading. Still for some reason I feel drawn to her. I quickly shake my head trying to get her out of my thoughts. "Mandy, you need to focus on practising for your audition" I tell myself. I look through the songs from RENT to pick one for my audition, but none of them seem right for me. Maybe it's just because I have Mandy Lopez-Pierce on my mind but I start looking through songs about love. She won't even be there, I tell myself but it doesn't work. It's like my hand is refusing to obey and keeps looking through the songs anyway. I smile when I come across a song that I know instantly is the perfect one for me. It's a little cheesy but I think it describes how I feel pretty damn well.

"Stop it Mandy she's not going to be there. This is completely about the song being the right song for you and has nothing to do with your feelings for this girl" I berate myself. But even then I know I'm lying.

My audition is on Monday. I have to keep reminding myself that she's not going to be there and I shouldn't be nervous but I'm on edge in all of my classes before my audition. It's like my body knows something my brain doesn't. I'm walking to the audition when I notice Mandy Lopez-Pierce heading in the same direction as me.

"What are you doing? Are you auditioning too?" I ask.

"Yeah for Maureen. You?" she says.

"Joanne. You can't be here. We can't play romantic leads in a musical together" I say.

"Why the hell not? It's only acting right?" she says.

"Yeah of course" I say but I know I don't sound very convincing.

"Unless it's not entirely acting on your part?" she asks.

"I meant on your part. I mean you tried to kiss me on Friday, you can't tell me that was just Kara being in control?"

"No. Kara is just a more confident version of me. I wanted to kiss you; I just didn't have the confidence to do it. I almost wanted you to kiss me back" she says.

"Well, I don't tend to kiss people who ambush me in the hallway" I say.

"You can keep denying it all you want but I know you have feelings for me" she says.

"You can think whatever you like, I'm not saying anything" I say.

"I know this is hard for you but you can't deny who you are" she says.

"I'm not a lesbian if that's what you want me to tell you" I say.

"I don't want you to tell me that. I just want you to admit that you like me" she says.

"I will tell you how I feel as and when I feel appropriate" I say.

"You're not embarrassed by me are you? Because of the whole MPD thing?" she asks.

"I'm not embarrassed. Yes the Multiple Personality thing will take a while for me to get used to but this isn't about you. This is about me. I'm just a little confused about my feelings for you and I'm trying to work them out before I admit my feelings to anyone, even you" I say.

"Just promise me this isn't a delay tactic" she says.

"I promise. As soon as I work out how I feel about you, you'll know too, okay?" I say.

"Okay" she says and she gives me a hug before we walk into the auditorium together. She tries to hold my hand but I pull away. I may like her but I'm not ready for everyone to know.

I'm one of the last to audition; I've had to sit through all the guys and most of the girls auditions before it's my turn. The only one left after me, is Mandy.

"Mandy Puckerman? Do you want to go next?" Uncle Finn asks.

"Sure Mr Hudson" I say. I have a moment of doubt about singing the song I had chosen to sing for my audition. I didn't expect her to be here and I'm not sure how I feel about singing it in front of her. I decide to sing it anyway. Mandy's behind me, so I won't be able to see her reaction but we share a look just before I walk out into the centre of the stage.

I take a deep breath and then I start to sing.

(A/N: I changed some of the lyrics to make the song appropriate to Mandy's situation)

Mandy:

If there's a prize for rotten judgement

I guess I've already won that

No girl is worth the aggravation

That's ancient history been there done that

(I'm about to sing the next line when I'm interrupted by Mandy. She walks over to me and stares right into my eyes. I can't tear my eyes away from her as hard as I try).

Amanda:

Who'd ya think you're kiddin'

She's the earth and heaven to you

Try to keep it hidden

Honey, I can see right through you

Girl, ya can't conceal it

I know how you feel and

Who you're thinking of

(I turn away from her)

Mandy:

No chance, no way

I won't say it no, no

Amanda:

You swoon, you sigh

Why deny it, uh-oh

Mandy:

It's too cliché

I won't say I'm in love

I thought my heart had learned its lesson

It feels so good when you start out

My head is screaming get a grip, girl

Unless you're dying to cry your heart out

Oh

Amanda:

You keep on denying

Who you are and how you're feeling

Baby, I'm not buying

Hon, I saw you hit the ceiling

Face it like a grown up

When ya gonna own up

That ya got, got, got it bad

Mandy:

Whoa, no chance, no way

I won't say it, no, no

Amanda:

Give up, give in

Check the grin, you're in love

Mandy:

This scene won't play

I won't say I'm in love

Amanda:

You're doin' flips read my lips

You're in love

Mandy:

You're way off base

I won't say it

Get off my case

I won't say it

Amanda:

Girl, don't be proud

It's O.K. you're in love

Mandy:

Oh

At least out loud,

I won't say I'm in love

We just look at each other for a few moments until I look away.

"Do you guys need some time alone?" Uncle Finn asks, sensing the tension between us.

"That would be….." Mandy starts to say but I interrupt.

"We don't need time. We're fine. Mandy just liked the song and decided that she wanted to join in" I say.

"Okay then. If you're sure" Uncle Finn says.

"I am" I say shooting a warning glance at Mandy.

"Well I guess since you sang with Mandy there's no reason to make you sing again Amanda. How about you two go first for the chemistry test?" he says. I'm not sure if he's trying some sick joke or something because I'm pretty sure everyone in the room could feel the chemistry between Mandy and I.

"Why not?" Mandy says winking at me. She knows that her singing that song with me got to me and she's revelling in it. Not because she wants to hurt me or anything but because she knows my true feelings for her now.

Finn hands us both copies of the script although I basically learned most of Joanne's parts over the weekend, so I don't really need it. He points to the short scene he wants us to read, the scene where Joanne and Maureen reunite.

"Pookie….."Mandy reads.

"Honeybear" I read and as the script suggests I hug her.

"I missed you…." I say.

"I missed your smell…." she responds.

"I missed your mouth….Your" I say and then I hesitate.

"I know this might be awkward you guys, but I need you to kiss, like it says in the script" Uncle Finn says.

"Do we have to?" I ask.

"It's going to be a real kiss on the night and you guys will need to get used to it if they want to play these parts. Besides, part of this is seeing which pair is most believable as a couple" he says.

Mandy places her hands on my waist. I can't believe this is how our first kiss is going to happen but I guess I have to go with it. My lips meet hers and we kiss. It's sweet and soft and amazing, I've never felt like this kissing anyone before. It's supposed to be a short kiss but we wrap our arms around each other, falling into the kiss.

"Okay lovebirds, time to get on with the rest of the scene" Uncle Finn says laughing.

We both blush bright red and Mandy looks back down at her script.

"Ow!" she says.

"What?" I ask.

"Nothing Pookie" Mandy says.

"No baby, you said ow…what?" I reply.

"Well you bit my tongue" she says awkwardly.

"No I didn't" I say.

"You did-I'm bleeding" she says.

"No it isn't…" I say.

"I think I should know" she replies in a haughty tone.

"Let me see-" I say.

"She doesn't believe me!" she says.

"I was only trying to…." I say. We both laugh as directed in the script and then hug and wave to each other.

"That's great guys. You can go now. The cast list will be up next week" Uncle Finn says.

Mandy takes my hand and leads me off the stage, all the way into the choir room.

"What are we doing here?" I ask.

"I wanted us to have some privacy. We need to talk" she says.

"I hate it when people say that" I say.

"We need to talk about what we're going to do about us" she says.

"What "us", there is no 'us'" I say.

"Not yet. But come on, you felt that kiss back there, someday there is going to be an 'us', isn't there?" she says.

"I'm not sure" I say.

"What aren't you sure about?" she asks.

"Whether I can handle what people will say" I say.

"Who cares about what people will say?" she asks.

"I do! I don't want to be bullied for the rest of my life because I decided that I liked girls as well as guys" I say.

"Sometimes we have to be brave to get what we want" she says.

"I'm not sure if this is what I want" I say.

"Yes you are. Your song said it, your kiss said it. What you want is me" she says.

"You can't tell me what I want!" I yell.

"This isn't me telling you what you want. This is your actions telling you what you want" she says.

"What if we break up? I'm not going to go through all the backlash of going out with a girl, if it's not going to be worth it" I say.

"We'll just have to risk it to find out" she says.

"I don't want to risk anything" I say.

"You'll never get anything out of life if you're not prepared to take chances. This could be something really great" she says.

"How do you know that? You barely know me, I barely know you. We've never even really been friends, how can you know that us being in a relationship will be something great?" I ask.

"I just do" she says.

"That's not good enough for me. I need to be sure" I say.

"We can't be sure about everything in life Mandy. Sometimes we just need to take the leap" she says taking my hand.

"And if I take the leap and fall flat on my face?" I ask.

"Then I'll be right there to catch you" she says. She pulls me closer into her. Our lips touch, just grazing each other at first but then our kiss becomes harder, deeper and more passionate.

"So what do you say? Are you willing to take the leap with me?" she asks pulling away from me.

I should be able to immediately answer yes. Yes I like this girl and I'm willing to risk everything that comes with admitting I like her. But I hesitate and she sees me do it. I think she's just going to run but she's waiting. Waiting for an answer.

"I can't" I say. A flash of hurt crosses her face and she runs out of the room, crying and slamming the door behind her. She doesn't say anything not even an angry "screw you". That makes it worse. I'd rather have her angry and yelling at me, than silent and sad. Silence hurts more.

I fall to the floor in the choir room and lean back against one of the chairs. Then I to, start to cry, soft sniffles at first and then loud sobs, for being too cowardly to say what I should have said, and for not running after her and fighting to keep her.

Bianna's POV

It's only the third day of my grounding and I'm already bored out of my mind. Without my fags, computer, IPod and phone, I'm going out of my mind with boredom. Still, rules were made to be broken, and I'll be damned if I'm going to sit in my room for the next two weeks just because I prefer to smoke and hang out with my friends than go to stupid classes and learn things I'll never need anyway. Mama never went to college and she's turned out fine. At the moment, I just want to have fun and enjoy being seventeen without having to think about the future. All I know I want for my future is to get out of Lima and stay the hell out of Lima, unlike my moms. After I've done that I figure I'll just go with the flow.

I grab my spare phone from the secret compartment in my diary. I've been good for the past three days and not used it but desperate times call for desperate measures. I send a text to Oscar.

-I'm seriously bored. Wanna go out? xxx B

The reply comes within seconds.

-I would love to but my mom's watching me like a fuckin' hawk. O

-Come on man, I seriously need to party. Besides I know you have fags-my mom's taken mine away and I'm having serious withdrawal symptoms! xxx B

-Actually my mom took mine away too. Sorry. O

-Are you sure you can't come? xxx B

-Mom's outside my door now. Gotta hide my phone. Looks like you're flying solo tonight B. O

I groan when I read his last message. Partying is always more fun with Oscar and Jorge than it is by myself. But if I don't get out of this house tonight then I will go stir crazy. Luckily for me, Saturday night is Mama and Mom's date night. Ty is out with some guy he met on Wednesday, who I haven't heard anything about other than his name is Luke, he's gay, sixteen and lives in Columbus and Mandy is sitting in her room depressed because Mandy Puckerman will never go out with her. I don't see why she's so depressed, if Mandy agrees to go out with her then she'll have to actually tell Mama and Mom that she's a lesbian and I know she doesn't want to do that.

Still it makes things easier for me. I don't even have to sneak out of the house, all I have to do is walk out the door and get on my bike. Lima's nightlife consists of our local bar The Watering Hole, so I go to a club in Columbus. I've had a fake ID since I was fifteen, so it isn't hard for me to get in.

I love partying in bars and I suppose the one good thing about being by myself tonight means that I can flirt with (and make out with) all the guys I want. When I'm with Jorge and Oscar, they get overly protective and scare all the guys away from me, so it will be good to actually get some attention. Who knows? Maybe I'll find a cute college guy for a boyfriend here, since this bar is the hang out for University of Ohio students.

"An apple martini please" I say to the bar man.

"I.D.?" he asks. I hand it to him. He looks a little sceptical but he gives me the drink, sliding the I.D. back towards me.

"Martini, oooh, someone's a classy girl" a guy says appearing behind me.

"Trust me, I am in no way classy" I say.

"I'll have a scotch on the rocks please" the guy says putting some bills on the counter.

"I'll be paying for her too" he says gesturing to my drink.

"You don't have to do that" I say.

"I want to" he says.

"In which case I'll have another one" I say quickly downing the last of my drink.

"You heard the lady" he says to the bartender.

He hands me the second martini glass. "You know I really shouldn't be taking drinks from strangers. For all I know you could have drugged my drink" I say.

"I haven't had the opportunity to drug your drink, besides I wouldn't do that" he says.

"Still, I think I'd like a name" I say.

"Harry Martins" he replies, the glint in his eyes showing that's not his real name.

"Maria Santos" I respond, the name on my own fake ID.

He leads me to a quieter corner of the club, where we sit on one of these big leather sofas.

"It's Avan Fernandez actually" he says holding out a hand to me. I hadn't realised he was Hispanic in the dim lighting of downstairs, but up here his Latino skin tone and dark hair are clearer.

"Bianna Lopez-Pierce" I say shaking his hand.

"So how old does your ID say you are?" he asks.

"21" I say.

"You're like 18 though right?" he asks.

"I'm 17 actually, high school junior. You?" I say.

"19, I'm a college freshman. But according to my ID I'm 24" he says.

"So Fernandez? Your family's Hispanic?" I ask.

"We're Mexican-my family comes from Mexico City" he says.

"My mama's family comes from Puerto Rico" I say.

"You said your last name was Lopez-Pierce. Pierce doesn't sound very Spanish" he says.

"It isn't. My mama added my mom's name to hers when they got married-my mom's not Latina, she's American" I say.

"You have two moms?" he asks.

"Yeah, why, does that offend your or something?" I ask defensively.

"No need to get all defensive. I was just curious. I don't think there's anything wrong with being gay" he says.

"I'm glad. I hate it when people look down on my moms for being gay. My brother and sister are gay too" I say.

"And you?" he asks.

"And me, what?" I ask.

"Are you gay too?" he asks.

"No. Are you?" I say smiling in a way that I hope is sexy.

"No. Why do I look like I should be?" he says.

"You're really hot and a lot of the hot guys I meet are gay" I say.

"Well I guess I'm the exception to the rule" he says.

"I guess you are" I say.

"Do you want another drink?" he asks.

"I shouldn't. I have to drive home" I say.

"I can drive your car if you want" he says.

"That would be great if I had a car, but I have a bike. A Norton actually" I say.

"A Norton? That's awesome!" he says.

"So I take it you like bikes?" I say laughing.

"I love them. I have one myself actually. A Triumph, so I'm sure I can drive your bike back if you want to have a few more drinks" he says.

"Are you sure?" I ask.

"Yeah. Now that I've met you, I have a feeling I won't be needing alcohol to have fun" he says.

"In which case I will have another apple martini" I say.

He quickly brings me back my martini. "So how come you came to the bar tonight? I don't see many high schoolers in here and I'm a regular" he says.

"I was bored out of my mind at home because my moms grounded me. So I snuck out and came here. I don't see how you can be a regular if you didn't know who I was before tonight. Me and my friends come here all the time" I say.

"Are you sure? I think I would have recognized a face as pretty as yours" he says.

"That's such a corny chat up line and yes I'm sure I've been here before" I say.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" he asks.

"Would I be out alone on a Saturday night if I did?" I ask.

"I guess not. Surprising though, a girl as pretty as you without a boyfriend" he says.

"Well I'd expect a guy as hot as you probably has a girlfriend" he says.

"Would I be out alone on a Saturday night if I did?" he asks repeating my response. It makes me laugh.

"So I told you about my family, now I want to hear about yours" I say.

"There's not much to tell. Like I said my family's from Mexico, my parents are doctors-Jose and Maria Fernandez. Oh and I have four sisters" he says.

"Four?" I say incredulously.

"My family's Catholic and they tend to have big families. Five kids is nothing, we lived next door to a family who had thirteen" he says.

"So living with four sisters? How do you like that?" I ask.

"Let's just say I was relieved when I moved out to OSU. But I do love my sisters, most of the time" he says.

"Does your family still live in Mexico?" I ask.

"Yes, well my parents and three younger sisters do. My eldest sister Cristina is 18 and she just moved to New York to get her teaching degree at NYU" he says.

"That's cool. My moms are teachers" I say.

"What do they teach?" he asks.

"They're dance teachers, our family owns a dance school. They're amazing, they taught me and my brother to dance and now we're among the best young dancers in Ohio" I say.

"My sister wants to be a music teacher" he says.

"Do you like music?" I ask.

"I like rock music mainly" he says.

"You're such a guy, although I will admit rock music is cool. So Cristina wants to be a music teacher, what about your other sisters?" I say.

"My sister Gabriela is 16, she's the bane of my parents' life because she wants to be an artist rather than as they say "something worthwhile" but she's really good drawing and she's not giving up on it. She's threatening to drop out of school but my parents have said they won't pay for her to go to RISD if she does. My other sister Ariana is 13, she's crazy into ballet-it's the only thing she's taken up that she hasn't quit a few months after. My youngest sister Allesandra is 11 and she's my parents' pride and joy because she loves science and says she wants to be a doctor like them" he says.

"And you? What are you doing at OSU?" I ask.

"Law" he says.

"You would not have struck me as a law student" he says.

"I want to be able to help people-you wouldn't believe the number of people in Mexico who weren't able to afford legal help when they really needed it" he says.

"So you're not just in it for the money?" I say.

"No. I want to be the sort of lawyer that really cares about their clients" he says.

"That sounds great" I say smiling.

"So what about you? What do you want to do?" he asks.

"I'm not sure yet. I mean I've grown up dancing so maybe I'll do that. I just don't see why you chose to come to Ohio of all places. All I know for sure is that I want to get out of here" I say.

"That's exactly how I felt about Mexico. Besides OSU offered me a football scholarship, nowhere else did" he says.

"Do you like it here?" I ask.

"I prefer it to Mexico City but I've only been here since August, so I haven't really seen much of Ohio yet" he says.

"Aside from the bars" I say laughing.

"Aside from them. Speaking of which, do you want me to refresh your drink?" he asks.

"It's okay, I'm feeling a little tipsy" I say.

"All the more reason to keep drinking" he says, walking over to the bar and bringing me back another drink.

"Are you trying to get me drunk so I'll sleep with you? Because I'll warn you, I'm not that type" I say putting the drink down.

"Of course not. I just want you to have fun" he says.

"I am having fun. Getting to know you is fun" I say.

"I'm glad. So stop worrying and finish your drink" he says.

"Fine but you can't give me anymore after this. My moms will go nuts if they find out I was out drinking" I say.

"If you're sure" he says.

"I am" I say.

"So you said you were a pretty good dancer right?" he asks.

"Pretty good? I'm the daughter of two incredible dancers, I'd like to think I'm better than just 'pretty good'" I say.

"Why don't you show me?" he asks.

"But I haven't prepared a routine, and I'm kind of drunk" I say.

"Oh come on, you can't tell me you haven't danced without having prepared a routine before" he says.

"You're right, I can't. I also can't tell you I haven't danced while drunk before because that also wouldn't be true" I say giggling.

"So go on then. Dance for me" he says.

"You know you make me sound like a stripper when you say that" I say.

"I didn't mean it like that. Although if you want to strip, I would raise no objections" he says raising his eyebrows.

"You are so bad" I say slapping him lightly, although I'm not really offended.

"So? Are you going to dance or not?" he asks.

"Sure" I say. I stumble over to the stage, tripping on my heels. I flick them off and ask the bartender to put a track on over the speaker system.

"Avan Hernandez, this one's for you" I say working my way up to the top of the pole. I swear his eyes almost pop out of his head when he sees me at the top of the pole. The music starts and I begin to sing.

Bianna:

Birds flying high

You know how I feel

Sun in the sky

You know how I feel

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

For me

And I'm feeling good

I'm feeling good

(I slide my little black dress off, leaving me in just my underwear as I do a pirouette on the pole)

Fish in the sea

You know how I feel

River running free

You know how I feel

(I swing my legs apart into the Russian splits and I swear Avan's mouth drops completely to the floor)

Blossom on a tree

You know how I feel

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

For me

And I'm feeling good

(I unclip my stockings and slowly remove them, throwing them into the crowd of men who are eagerly watching me dance. I hook my right leg around the pole, grabbing it with my left hand and sticking my left leg and right arm straight out-the hero position)

Dragonfly out in the sun you know what I mean, don't you know

Butterflies all havin' fun you know what I mean

Sleep in peace when day is done

That's what I mean

(I slide up the pole, bringing both of my legs together with my knees bent. I pull my arms back behind me, grasping onto my feet, leaving my head upside down-a move called the funky monkey. I can't hold it for very long, so I swing my arms around so I'm holding onto the pole sideways with my legs bent in opposite directions-the twisted monkey)

And an old world is a new world

And a bold world

For me

For me

(I hesitate slightly. Usually when I'm on the pole, I never take off my underwear but I'm just drunk enough and I want to impress Avan. I slowly unclip my black lacy bra, swinging it over my head and throwing it out into the crowd. Avan catches it and winks at me. I slide down so my hands are at the base of the pole, sticking my legs out in a straddle position, one leg behind the pole and one leg on the outside of the pole-the Gemini handstand. The men really seem to like this one, because my breasts are completely exposed to the crowd. The men cheer as soon as I do this move)

Stars when you shine

You know how I feel

Scent of a pine

You know how I feel

Oh freedom is mine

(I turn on my hands, facing side on to the pole, and swinging my legs so both my legs are bent, one facing forwards and one facing backwards-the forward attitude handstand)

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

(I swing upright, and grinding against the pole, slowly shimmy and remove my black lacy underwear. The room explodes when the horny men see my fully naked body and I should feel disgusted but if anything it gives me more confidence. I cross my legs around the pole, throwing my arms and head backwards-the nose breaker drop)

It's a new dawn

It's a new day

It's a new life

It's a new life

For me

(I swing my legs into a straddle, my left arm under my left leg grasping the pole and my right hand keeping me upright on the base of the pole-the extended handstand)

And I'm feeling good

(I slide further up the pole, my hands bent behind my head, grasping the pole, my left leg hooked around the pole and my right leg pointing straight up-a move called the dangerous bridge)

I'm feeling good

(I turn my arms so I am facing sideways, one arm on either side grasping the pole and my legs facing straight upwards, a move called the Pointer)

I feel so good

(I slide down to the bottom of the pole, standing on my head, facing forwards so my breasts are exposed, my legs bent backwards around the pole, my hands grasping the base-the headstand)

I feel so good

(I work my way up the pole, finishing the song in a teddy straddle (my legs on either side of the pole, with my left arm hooked around the pole and an arm grasping on to each leg) facing forward so I am completely exposed to the crowd of cheering guys. I smile sexily and as in my routine for my glee audition, I do a straddled back flip of the top of the pole and land in the splits. The crowd, especially Avan, cheer loudly).

I take a bow and guys keep trying to shove dollar bills at me (and get a feel of my breasts) but I slap their hands away. I pick up my dress and shoes from the stage.

"Anyone know where my underwear ended up?" I ask making everyone in the bar laugh. Avan holds it up.

"Show's over people" he says coming onto the stage and sweeping me off my feet.

He takes me into the girls' bathroom and I reach for my underwear.

"I don't think you'll need that just yet" he says sliding his hand up my thigh. I punch him right in the face.

"What the hell was that for? You basically just gave a sex show out there and you're punching me? I thought this was what you wanted?" he says.

"Well it's not okay. I didn't do that because I wanted to have sex with you. I'm a virgin and I'm not intending on losing my virginity in a club bathroom to a guy I barely know" I say, grabbing my underwear off him and pulling them on. I pull my dress on and slide into my heels.

"You're still going to give me a ride home right?" I ask.

"Of course. I'm not going to leave you stranded here with all those sleazy guys who will want to have another look at what's under the dress" he says but he looks kind of annoyed that I didn't let him sleep with me. Still I might be willing to strip naked in front of a bunch of guys but my virginity actually means something to me and I'm only going to lose it to someone I really love-I might be a little drunk, but I'm not drunk enough to let him take advantage of me.

I almost fall over the back of my bike as he places me on it.

"Do you have a spare helmet?" he asks.

"Yeah" I say pointing to the black helmet on the left handlebar. He puts it on and then places my helmet on my head.

"You really drove this here in that dress and those heels?" he asks.

"The dress yes, but I have a pair of flats in my bag" I say, slipping into my black flats and putting my heels in the bag.

He gets onto the bike. "Hold on tight" he says. I wrap my hands around his waist and lean my head on his shoulder.

"Are you sure you can drive this?" I ask.

"I told you I have a Triumph and my first bike was a Norton. I'll be fine, stop worrying" he says.

"Okay then. Start her up" I say.

"You ready?" he asks.
"Just get on with it already" I say.

"Alright" he says revving the bike. I thought I was a dangerous driver but he speeds down the highway at like twice the speed limit and doesn't hold back until we get to Lima. Luckily for him I don't see the point in having a bike unless you're going to go at full speed-otherwise you may as well just have a car!

"So where is your house?" he asks when he pulls into my road in Lima.

"It's the next one coming up on the left" I say. He pulls into my drive. I swing my helmet over one of the handlebars and he puts his helmet over the other one.

"I had a great time tonight. You really can dance, although I was joking when I said that I wouldn't object if you wanted to strip. I didn't think you would actually do it" he says.

"I guess I was flirting with you a little. Plus I knew my mom would hate it if I did a pole dance and actually stripped down to nothing, besides if you haven't noticed I have some great moves" I say.

"I did notice although I was a little distracted when you took your bra off. Where did you learn to do that?" he asks.

"Pole dance? A girl who came to one of my mom's classes knew how to do it and she gave me some lessons" I say.

"Why did you decide to learn pole dancing?" he asks.

"Well aside from anything else, it actually takes incredible skill. You need to have amazing strength, endurance and flexibility and its great exercise" I say.

"How long have you been learning?" he asks.

"About 3 years now. The girl who taught me said I picked it up faster than anyone she's ever taught but that's not surprising since I started dancing as soon as I could walk. It doesn't take me very long to pick up new styles of dance" I say.

"Well you looked really hot and those moves were incredible" he says.

"You think those moves were good, I have way more than just that"

"Oh I'm sure you do" he says pressing up against me.

"Well goodnight" I say quickly pulling away and walking towards my house.

"Wait" he says running after me.

"What?" I ask turning around and stopping in front of my front door.

"Aren't you going to give me a goodnight kiss?" he asks.

"This wasn't even a date. You're just a guy I met in a bar, I don't know if I'll ever see you again" I say.

"Well you're just a girl I met in bar too. But I'm pretty certain I want to kiss you, and I'm certain we're going to see each other again. So certain that I'm going to give you this" he says taking out a piece of paper from his pocket and writing something on it.

"What's that?" I ask.

"My phone number. If I made as much of an impression on you as you did on me, then I'm pretty sure you'll be using it" he says.

"Well someone's very cocky" I say, smiling.

"I prefer confident" he says returning the smile.

"If you want to kiss me, then just shut up and kiss me" I say, wrapping my arms around his waist. He kisses me, strong and hard, his tongue enveloping mine. Our kiss becomes deeper and more passionate and his hand tugs on my dress. I swat it away.

"I already told you, I'm not that kind of girl" I say.

"I still don't see why you won't but I promise I'll try to be patient" he says.

"It'll be worth it if you are, trust me" I say.

"You're a virgin how would you know?" he asks.

"Just a feeling I have" I say.

He takes my hand and we walk over to the trellis by my bedroom window.

"Give me a boost" I say. I stand on his hands and climb up onto the trellis. I'm a couple of feet up, when my head starts to spin and I fall. Avan catches me laughing.

"You okay?" he asks.

"Just feel a little lightheaded that's all" I say. He gently helps me up.

"Are you sure you're alright?" he asks.

"Positive" I say. But no sooner have I said this than I stagger into a bush and start retching. Avan rushes to my side and holds back my hair.

"Someone had a few too many martinis" he says.

"I knew I shouldn't have let you bring me that fourth one" I groan.

"Let's get you inside" he says.

"Okay just give me a boost up the trellis" I say.

"No way, I'm not letting you fall back down again. I'll take you up to your room" he says.

"You can't! It's late, my moms will be back by now and I'm grounded remember. They'll kill me if they see me come home drunk and with a boy" I say.

"I'll be really quiet, I promise" he says. He sweeps me up into arms.

"Do you have keys?" he asks. I pass him my bag.

He fumbles around for my keys, eventually finding them. He carefully turns the key in the lock and closes the door.

"Be quiet" I say.

"I'm trying" he whispers. He creeps up the stairs.

"Which one is your room?" he asks.

"The third door on the left" I whisper. He gently opens the door, closes it and then carries me to my bed. He lays me down gently, taking off my shoes and tilting my head so I won't choke on my own vomit. He takes a seat by the side of my bed.

"You have to go. My moms will kill me if they find you" I say.

"I can't leave you like this. I have to make sure you don't choke on your own vomit or something" he says.

"I'll be fine, now just go" I say.

"Not a chance" he says lying down beside me on the bed.

"What are you doing?" I ask.

"I'm fully dressed, don't worry" he says.

"I'm not" I say, although I can feel how turned on he is. I quickly slide out of my dress and stockings.

"Are you trying to send me a message or something?" he asks.

"No, I'm just trying to get more comfortable" I say. He kisses me gently on the forehead.

"Goodnight" he says.

"Just on the forehead? What are we, little kids?" I ask. He kisses me again on the lips this time, but pulls away before it gets too intense.

"Goodnight" I say smiling. I curl into him, leaning my head into his chest and inhaling his sweet scent.

"BIANNA, it's time for breakfast. Come on get up!" a voice breaks into my sleep, waking me up. It's my mom.

"SHIT!" I scream, remembering that I still have to get Avan out of here.

"Bianna sweetie? Are you okay?" Mom calls.

"I'm fine Mom; I just stubbed my toe on something. I'll be down in a minute" I say. I shake Avan awake.

"What's up?" he says sleepily.

"I need to get you out of here before my mom comes up here and finds you" I say quickly shoving my dress, stockings and shoes into my closet and throwing my dressing gown on.

"Stop panicking, I can just use the trellis" he says. Luckily he hadn't taken any of his clothes off, not even his shoes. I help him squeeze through the window and down onto the trellis.

"I can take it from here" he says.

"I had a great night" I say.

"So did I. So you'd better make sure you use that number I gave you. I'd like to take you out. On a proper date this time" he says.

"A proper date, I'd like that" I say smiling.

"So call me" he says.

"I will" I reply.

"Goodbye Bianna Lopez-Pierce. It was nice to meet you" he says.

"Goodbye Avan Fernandez. It was great to meet you too" I say. I smile to myself as I walk down to breakfast.

"Hey sweetie, how was your evening?" Mom asks.

"Oh, uneventful" I say, again secretly smiling to myself. They have no idea how eventful my evening was, or that at this very second, my potential new boyfriend is outside. Shit! Avan doesn't have a ride. I have to come up with an excuse for leaving and fast.

"I'm out of mascara, I'm just going to go out and get some" I say.

"Your mama can get some on her way back from class, I can call her" Mom says.

"No it's best if I do it myself" I say. I wolf down the rest of my breakfast and rush out of the house before Mom has the chance to say anything else.

"I'm so sorry. I forgot you didn't have a ride" I say.

"No big deal" he says.

"No it is. You helped drive me back last night, so I'll drive you back to the club so you can get your bike" I say.

"So now I'm the guy on the back of the bike?" he says.

"I guess you are" I say.

"You know what? I don't hate it" he says laughing. I laugh too. I put my helmet on and get on the bike. He puts on the spare helmet and gets on the bike behind me. I rev the bike.

"You ready?" I ask him.

"Always" he says. I smile beneath my helmet and we go racing off towards Columbus.

Nettie's POV

It's Saturday, the day of my mom's visit. I can't deny that I'm nervous to see her. I know that she has no reason at all to reject me, and I have every reason to reject her but I can't help feeling anxious about meeting her. I've built up this picture of my mom in my head and I couldn't bear it if she didn't live up to my expectations. But she's had time to build up expectations of me too. What if I don't live up to hers? The doorbell breaks into my reverie.

This is it. I rush down the stairs, opening the door.

"Oh it's you" I say when I see that John is the one standing at the door.

"Could you sound anymore disappointed?" he asks laughing.

"I was just expecting it to be Laura, that's all. I'm glad you're here though, I could use the support" I say.

"Where's the rest of your family?" he asks.

"They went out. Dad said he thought it would be better if we were left alone with Laura" I say.

"Are you sure you want me here? I could always go and leave the two of you alone" he says.

"No I want you here. Besides we wouldn't be alone anyway, she's bringing her husband" I say.

"I take it you're not so happy about that" he says.

"I just don't see why she had to bring him as well. It was going to be awkward enough with just her, let alone her husband" I say.

"You're bringing me. Maybe she just wants some support, like you do. She's probably just as nervous about this as you are" he says.

"You're right. I didn't think about it like that" I say.

We sit down on the sofa. "Don't chew her out too much Nettie. I know she hasn't been in your life since you were a little kid, but she has a reason for it. Just hear her out okay" he says.

"I will, I promise. I want this to work out just as much as she does" I say.

"She'll love you Nettie. How could anyone not?" he says reaching for my hand. I squeeze his but if I'm honest, I'm slightly cynical about love. None of the boyfriends I've ever had have loved me-they just wanted to see what base they could get to, so I kind of just figure that boys never really love you, they just want you to sleep with them. I'm hoping John's different, that he wants to go out with me because he likes me and not because he wants me to sleep with him.

"You agreed to do this because you want to be my friend right?" I ask. I know I shouldn't ask this but I need to know.

"Of course. Why did you think I did it?" he asks.

"Because you want to have sex with me" I admit.

"Nettie I would never do that. I know that other guys are like that but I swear I'm not. I'm here because I want to support you. As a friend" he says.

"Is that all you are? A friend?" I ask.

"Well for now. But I'm hoping after our date next week we might be something more" he says.

"I guess we'll see how it goes" I say.

"Yes we will. I promise Nettie, no matter what else, I will always be your friend" he says.

"That means a lot to me John, really" I say.

"Anytime" he says. We sit in silence for a few minutes, unsure of what to say to each other until the silence is broken by the doorbell ringing.

"That's her. What do I say?" I ask.

"Well usually when you answer the door to someone you say hello" he says laughing slightly.

"Be serious!" I say hitting him gently.

"I was. Just say hello to her and take it from there" he says. He takes my hand and we walk to the door together.

"Ready for this?" he asks.

"As ready as I'll ever be" I say. I take a deep breath and open the door.

We don't say anything to each other for a few minutes-she's probably analysing me just as much as I am her. The resemblance is uncanny-there's no doubting that this is my mom, she has the same dirty straight blonde hair, in a messy bun like mine (although she wears chopsticks in her hair) and the same cheerful brown eyes. She's even wearing red clothes like I always do.

"I can't believe it's you" she says, stepping forward to hug me. She's basically a stranger to me though, so I settle for a handshake.

"Well it is. People change a lot in fifteen years, especially if they were only nine months old the last time you saw them" I say.

"So you're not even going to let me in the house before you start to make me feel guilty" she says, a hurt look in her eyes.

"No, of course not. Come on in Laura. Is Marvin here?" I ask.

"Yeah he is. Marvin get over here" she calls to a man locking their car. He's a lot taller than I expected, at least a foot taller than her, with messy dark curly hair and grey eyes. Their height difference reminds me of looking at Aunt Rachel and Uncle Finn.

"Hi, I'm Marvin, Laura's husband. You must be Annie. Is that what you'd like me to call you? Do you have another name that you prefer?" he asks.

I don't want either of these strangers to call me Nettie. "Annie is fine" I say.

"So can we come in?" Marvin asks.

"Sure" I say allowing them into the house.

"Oh, this is John Chang; he's a friend of mine. I wanted some moral support when I met you" I say.

"I understand; that's why I brought Marvin along. Nice to meet you John" Laura says holding her hand out for him to shake and he does.

"Do you guys want anything to drink?" I ask.

"No thanks, I'm fine" Laura says.

"I'm fine too" Marvin says. They follow me through into the living room.

"So is John your boyfriend?" Laura asks me as they sit down on the sofa opposite me and John.

"We're just friends at the moment-our first date's next weekend so we'll see how it goes" John says.

"How long have you and Marvin been together?" I ask.

"Fourteen years" Laura admits.

"Just after you stopped coming to see me. That's convenient" I say, not hiding the slightly angry tone in my voice.

"I was in a bad place then" she says.

"Care to elaborate? I don't see any reason why you should have just abandoned your child" I say.

"I had cancer. Uterine cancer and I had to have hysterectomy. I couldn't have any more children" she says.

"What does that have to do with me?" I ask.

"Every time I saw you, I was reminded of the fact that you weren't really my daughter" she says.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Not as in biologically, but I was no more than a visitor in your life. I wasn't a real mother that was around for all your milestones and there to pick you up when you hurt yourself and tuck you in at night. The cancer was a wakeup call that I was never going to be anyone's mother so I decided that it was best to just stay away. But you're wrong when you say the last time I saw you was when you were 9 months old" she says.

"That's what my dads said" I say.

"I came to your first birthday party-that's where the photo I sent you was taken. I knew I'd regret it if I didn't at least come to your first birthday. After that, your dads left New York and I didn't feel like I could come and visit" she says.

"What, you came to one birthday so you think its okay that you missed all my other ones? That I didn't even get a present or a card from you?" I say trying desperately hard not to yell. John places a calming hand on my shoulder.

"I never said that. I was depressed after my surgery and I wasn't in the best place to be anyone's mom. So I threw myself into work and tried not to think about you. It didn't work-I thought about you all the time. Every single one of your birthdays, I wrote a card for you but I never sent it. I thought about picking up the phone and calling you but I thought you'd hate me. The mother who abandoned you" she says.

"I wouldn't hate you if you'd done those things" I say.

"I didn't know that then" she says.

"So what changed your mind? Why did you send me that letter?" I ask.

"Because you're the only daughter I'm ever going to have. I would have regretted it for the rest of my life if I hadn't contacted you" she says.

"You've had years to contact me. Why now?" I ask.

"It took me this long to get my act together I guess. I was a mess for a long time. Like I said I was depressed, and when I was depressed I drank. I was an alcoholic, and it was a habit I just didn't want to break. I nearly killed myself once by mixing booze with pills. I didn't feel like you deserved me as a mother" she says.

"So what's changed?" I ask.

"Well I'm in AA-have been for about 10 years now. I won't lie and say I've been sober the entire time, but I'm trying to put my life back together. I have a therapist as well. Marvin's been a huge support" she says.

"How does she know she can trust you?" John asks.

"John, it's okay" I say.

"No it's not. She's an alcoholic and you still trust her? What if she falls off the wagon again? She could hurt you Nettie" he says.

"No, he's right. For a long time I couldn't be any kind of mother, I'll admit that. But I have no reason to drink again-I was in a dark place then, I'm not now. I've had a steady job for the past five years and a great husband" she says.

"You were with Marvin before you went to AA though-you said you'd been together fourteen years and been in AA for ten" I say.

"Well it took me a while to figure out that my drinking wasn't helping anyone, least of all myself. But I did figure it out Annie. I want to be a mother to you" she says.

"I'd like that too. But that doesn't mean I trust you yet. We have to take baby steps" I say.

"I'm willing to wait as long as it takes. I want this relationship to work" she says.

"We want to be a family Annie" Marvin says.

"What exactly does that mean?" I ask.

"Well, eventually we'd like you to live with us" he says.

"Are you kidding man?" John says.

"Yeah I second that. I'm not moving back to New York with you. My dads and sisters are my family. I'm willing to have a relationship with you guys but it needs to be on my terms. One of which is that you don't try to take me away from my family-they're the people that raised me and I won't leave them" I say.

"I understand. I promise we won't try to take you away" Laura says.

"Good" I reply.

"So what do you like to do in your free time then Annie?" Laura asks.

"I like to sing-mainly punk stuff but some rock, and I really love Avril Lavigne-her music is awesome. I like to paint as well and I love to write. I like to watch soccer as well" I say.

"You like to paint?" she asks laughing a little.

"Why is that funny?" I ask.

"I'm an art teacher-that's the job I was talking about" she says.

"I don't get it-I assumed my dads knew you from NYADA?" I ask.

"They did. When I was 18, I thought that I wanted to be a Broadway star. I auditioned for NYADA, got in and I lasted exactly a semester before I realised that I wasn't cut out for it. I met your dads and they saw my drawings.

They encouraged me to apply to Central Saint Martins, in London and they helped me with my application.

So I went there and then for years I painted. My work sold pretty well but I didn't make millions from it.

I was approached by a friend I knew from New York-they said I would make a great art teacher. So I applied there to get an Education degree and I did.

I ran into your dads a few months after I got my first teaching job. They were looking for a surrogate and after what they did for me, helping me apply to Central Saint Martins, I offered to help them out" she says.

"Do you need to take a breath after saying that much?" I ask making her laugh.

"Sorry, I just have a lot to say to you. So many things that I need to explain" she says. I lean over and take her hand.

"We have time" I say.

"I'm glad you like painting. I always hoped my daughter would pick up my artistic talents" she says.

"I guess I'm just like my mom" I say.

"Well I hope you don't end up with my drinking problems" she says.

"I hope I don't either" I say making her laugh.

"So do you want to be an artist then?" she asks me.

"I don't think so. I prefer art as a hobby. I'm not sure exactly what I want to do. For the moment I kind of just want to get through high school" I say.

"Well you've got time right? You're only a sophomore?" she says.

"Actually I'm a junior" I say.

"But you're only fifteen?" she says.

"I skipped first grade" I say.

"So where are you planning to apply for college?" she asks.

"I want to go to the University of Florida-they have a great Criminology course" I say.

"So you want to be a police officer? Or?" she asks.

"Like I said I'm not sure yet-I don't know if I want to write, or be on the stage or be in the FBI" I say.

"Well you have some time. I didn't decide what I wanted to do until I got to Central Saint Martins" she says.

"So what's with the red outfit?" I ask.

"It's my favourite colour-I like to wear as much of it as possible" she says.

"Me too" I reply.

"You said you like to write, can I read something you wrote?" she asks.

"I'm working on something at the moment-but I have your address, so maybe I can send it to you when I'm done?" I suggest.

"Sounds good" she says.

"Can you play anything?" I ask.

"I used to play guitar-haven't played in a while though" she says.

"I play piano. I'd love to play guitar though" he says.

"I'd offer to teach you, but I'm not sure if I can even play that well myself anymore" she says.

"Can you sing?" I ask.

"I haven't sung in a long time" she says.

"It's just I always imagined singing with my mom" I say.

"Well I might be a little rusty but I can give it a go" she says.

"Great! I'll take you down to the music room" I say.

"I'll wait here for you guys" John says.

"You're coming too" I say grabbing his hand. Marvin and Laura follow us down the stairs to the basement.

"My dads soundproofed it when we moved in" I say.

"Do you play down here a lot?" she asks.

"All the time, I love it down here" I say.

"So what song do you want to sing?" she asks.

"It's an Avril Lavigne song-When You're Gone. It's about a relationship with a guy but for some reason, I always related it to you" I say.

"Oh yeah, I know that song" she says.

"John? Will you sing with us?" I ask.

"I don't know. Isn't this really a mother-daughter moment?" he asks.

"It's alright John. If Annie wants you to sing with us, then you should sing with us" Laura says.

"There you go. Can't get out of it now" I say, making him laugh. I take my seat behind the piano and start to play.

Nettie:

I always needed time on my own

I never thought I'd need you there when I cry

And the days feel like years when I'm alone

And the bed where you lie

Is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take

Both:

Do you see how much I need you right now?

Nettie:

When you're gone

The pieces of my heart are missing you

John:

When you're gone

The face I came to know is missing too

Laura:

When you're gone

The words I need to hear to always get me through the day

Nettie:

And make it OK

I miss you

Laura:

I've never felt this way before

Everything that I do reminds me of you

John:

And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor

And they smell just like you

Nettie:

I love the things that you do

Laura:

When you walk away I count the steps that you take

Nettie:

Do you see how much I need you right now?

John:

When you're gone

The pieces of my heart are missing you

Nettie:

When you're gone

The face I came to know is missing too

Laura:

When you're gone

The words I need to hear to always get me through the day

Nettie:

And make it OK

Laura:

I miss you

John:

We were made for each other

Out here forever

Nettie:

I know we were, yeah, yeah

All I ever wanted was for you to know

Everything I do, I give my heart and soul

Laura:

I can hardly breathe; I need to feel you here with me, yeah

Nettie:

When you're gone

The pieces of my heart are missing you

Laura:

When you're gone

The face I came to know is missing too

John:

When you're gone

The words I need to hear will always get me through the day

Nettie:

And make it OK

Nettie and Laura:

I miss you

When I finish playing, the piano keys are wet. There are tears rolling down my cheeks and matching tears in Laura's eyes. For the first time I hug her.

"I'm so sorry Nettie. I shouldn't have let so many years go by without talking to you" she says.

"I can't say it didn't hurt me. But I understand. You didn't want me to think I had a washed up drunk for a mother" I say.

"Exactly" she says.

"I was totally ready to bite your head off about this. I thought you'd left me just because you didn't care" I say.

"I cared more than you knew. The cancer shattered me. I had thought that I had all the time in the world to have kids but I didn't. So I pushed away the only one I had and turned to drinking. If I could go back and change my decision then I would" she says.

"There's no point regretting the past. We can only look forward to the future" I say.

"So we will have a future?" she asks.

"You're my mother; of course we have a future. As long as you can stay off the booze. Deal?" I ask.

"That's a deal I will definitely keep" she says.

"So are you heading back today or can you stay a little longer?" I ask.

"I don't think we're heading back until tomorrow evening" she says looking at Marvin.

"Maybe I could see you again tomorrow then" I say.

"I would love that. How about we spend a mother-daughter day tomorrow?" she suggests.

"I think I could manage that" I say.

"Then I guess I'll see you tomorrow" she says.

"Thank you for coming" I say.

"Thank you for not yelling at me or slamming the door in my face" she says.

"You can thank John for that" I say.

"Well thank you John. If you and Annie actually do end up getting together, then I think you'll be a great fit for her" she says.

"Thank you mam" he says. I lead Laura and Marvin back upstairs.

"We'd better head back to our hotel" Laura says.

"You can stay for dinner if you want. My dads and sisters should be back soon" I say.

"I don't think that will go over well. Your dads don't like me very much" she says.

"I thought you were their friend" I reply.

"I was. But I started drinking and I pushed all my friends away. I never saw them again after your first birthday" she says.

"Did they know about your drinking problem?" I ask.

"No. I was drinking when I stopped seeing you, but my problem wasn't that bad until after they moved to Lima with you" she says.

"So why don't they like you?" I ask.

"I stopped visiting my daughter with no explanation, that's why" she says.

"They'll come around eventually" I say.

"I hope you're right because I will want to visit you a lot" she says.

"I'm counting on it" I say. She gives me another hug and this time I relax into it.

"See you tomorrow Annie" she says.

"See you tomorrow Laura" I reply, still not quite able to bring myself to call her mom. I say goodbye to Marvin, and they say goodbye to John. All too soon, their car is pulling away from the driveway.

"See, that wasn't as bad as you thought it was going to be" John says.

"No. I mean I'm still kind of pissed that she didn't come to see me after my first birthday, but I don't think I would have wanted to see her after what she told me. At least she didn't stop seeing me because she hates me" I say.

"No one could ever hate you" John says.

"Thank you for being here. You really helped keep me calm" I say.

"I wouldn't have been anywhere else" he says.

"I know you wouldn't" I say. He pulls me close to him and runs his fingers through my hair.

"I'm so proud of you" he says.

"I'm pretty proud of me too" I say. He leans into me and kisses me. The kiss is long and wonderful. We start to kiss more intensely and he pushes me back onto the couch, still kissing me. We pull away before anything serious happens.

"I think we can safely say that we're not just friends anymore" I say laughing.

"I've wanted to do that since the day I met you" he says.

"Why didn't you?" I ask.

"Because you don't generally kiss girls you barely know" he says.

"I would have kissed you" I say.

"Well do you want to kiss again?" he asks.

"I think we should wait until after our first date" I say and we move to either end of the couch. A few seconds pass in silence.

"I'm not sure if I can wait that long" I say.

"Me either" he replies, pushing me back down on the couch and kissing me again.

Finn's POV

Our second glee club meeting of the year is the Friday after the auditions for RENT and naturally all the Glee members who auditioned are dying to know who got which part.

"So Mr Hudson, have you decided on the parts yet?" Mandy Puckerman asks me when I come in for the next Glee meeting.

"No I haven't. The cast list will be up by next Friday. However with that in mind, I have decided what your assignment for this week is" I say.

"What is it?" Emberly asks. I write the word RENT on the whiteboard in the choir room-probably the same whiteboard that Mr Schue used to write all our assignments on, all those years ago.

"Your assignment for this week is to perform a song from the musical. It could be as a solo, or a duet, or as a bigger group but you all have to perform one. Those of you who want a part in the musical, I will be watching your performances very closely. Those of you who aren't don't think you can take this assignment less seriously. I want great performances from all of you" I say. I can tell some of the kids are more excited for this assignment than others.

"So to start off this assignment, I thought we could all do a group number" I say.

"Which one?" Marie asks.

"Seasons of Love" Finn says.

"Sounds great! I'll take the lead" Emberly says.

"It doesn't work like that Emberly. I've decided on the leads for the song already. I thought we'd have six leads, three boys and three girls. The girls I have chosen are Lace, Heather and Amanda. The boys are Avery Adams, Ty and AJ" he says.

"How come only Amanda gets to have a girl's lead out of the girls who auditioned?" Emberly asks.

"Because she was one of the girls who didn't have many lines in the group number last week. I want everyone to have an equal opportunity to let their voices be heard in here. That means you have to share leads Ember. You will have your chance to show off your voice in your solo song" I say.

Ember doesn't look very happy about this but I can't be seen to be playing favourites. These kids are all insanely talented and I need to give them all a chance.

"So everyone get into position, leads at the front" I say and gesture for the piano player (our new Brad as I call him) to start playing.

All:

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred moments so dear

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes

How do you measure, measure a year?

Lace:

In daylights, in sunsets

In midnights, in cups of coffee

Heather:

In inches, in miles, in laughter in strife

In five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes

Amanda:

How do you measure, a year in the life?

How about love?

How about love?

How about love?

Lace, Heather & Amanda:

Measure in love

Seasons of love (ND: Love)

Seasons of love (ND: Love)

All:

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes

Five hundred twenty five thousand journeys to plan

Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes

How do you measure the life of a woman or a man?

Avery Adams:

In truths that she learned

Or in times that he cried

Ty:

In bridges he burned

Or the way that she died

AJ:

It's time now, to sing out

Though the story never ends

Avery Adams:

Let's celebrate

Remember a year in the life of friends

Lace:

Remember the love

(ND: Oh you got to; you got to remember the love)

Remember the love

(ND: You know that love is a gift from up above)

Heather:

Remember the love

(ND: Share love, give love)

Measure in love

(Measure, measure your life in love)

All:

Seasons of love

Seasons of love

Amanda:

Measure your life, measure your life in love

"And that's how you kick off RENT week guys! Good job. So by our next meeting I would like you to have each performed RENT number-they don't have to be solos, you just have to choose a song from the musical that you feel shows off your voice the best. I look forward to seeing what you come up with" I say. I know RENT is a risky choice for a school musical but I'm glad I chose it. That song really highlighted the kids' voices and I'm looking forward to seeing what they come up with for the assignment.

A/N: So that was chapter 4-I don't expect chapter 5 to be as long but then I didn't expect chapter 4 to be this long so you never know! I don't know when I'll be updating since I have to do revision for my exams over the Easter holidays. The songs used in this chapter were Let It Go-Demi Lovato, performed by Ivy Evans, No One Knows Who I Am-Jekyll and Hyde, performed by Emberly Hudson, Fever-Peggy Lee, performed by Marie Puckerman and Dave O'Connor, La Vie En Rose-Louis Armstrong, performed by Marie Puckerman, I Won't Say I'm In Love-Hercules, performed by Mandy Puckerman and Mandy Lopez-Pierce, Feeling Good-Michael Buble, performed by Bianna Lopez-Pierce, When You're Gone-Avril Lavigne, performed by Nettie Hummel-Anderson, Laura Calloway and John Chang and Seasons Of Love-Rent, performed by the New Directions. All rights go to owners.

Review?