In their opinion, everything was going according to plan. Osomatsu showed Jyushimatsu the foreign imports stand that he had hung around the day before, while the rest of the brothers spied on them from not too far away, out of their sight.
"He's gonna screw this up."
"Non non, Totty! We must have our utmost faith in him, lest he fail gracelessly."
"You're just concerned because if this doesn't work, then you're going to have to try next."
"Ch-Choromatsu, my buraza… such cruelty…."
"All of you, shut the hell up. I'm trying to hear what's going on."
At Ichimatsu's words, they fell silent and watched as the first and fifth brothers took a seat at the small bar. Osomatsu waved down the bartender, ordered a couple beers, then turned to Jyushimatsu.
"Alright, so tell me more about your little… friend."
"Ah, Major Homerun Eight-Legged Matsu?" he spoke happily as he, once again, plucked the arachnid off of his head and plopped it right onto the counter in front of them. The bartender dropped off their drinks, and Osomatsu snatched his glass and leaned away from the spider, attempting to look casual. "I won him at the fishing game! That's your specialty, right Osomatsu Nii-san?"
"You got that right, buddy! Nobody beats me!" Both brothers chugged their drinks down and Osomatsu quickly ordered another round. "Well, nobody beat me before until you did yesterday, though." Jyushimatsu shook his head immediately, gesturing to the spider.
"No no! Nii-san is still the best! I only won because I really wanted Major Homerun Eight-Legged Matsu!"
"Such a mouthful," Oso tsked, downing his beverage before ordering more for them. "Can we just call him… I dunno, 'Eight Legs' or something?" Jyushimatsu pondered this for a moment, drinking the two beers in front of him as he did, and faced his older brother with a wide grin.
"Eight Legs likes that nickname! Ha ha!" He picked up the tarantula gently and held it out to him. "Hey, that means you like him too, right? You gave him a nickname! You must like him a lot!"
Osomatsu grimaced, ignoring the quiet snickering from one of the stands around the corner behind them. "Oh… yeah, he's… great, Jyushimatsu." He ordered more drinks for them and drank his without another word. They sat together in silence for quite some time, ordering more drinks whenever they finished a glass. Jyushimatsu finally broke the silence after the seventh round or so (or around that much, they stopped keeping count a while ago).
"Wanna pet him?"
The spider being presented about 4 inches from his face, in a word, surprised him quite a bit. Osomatsu nearly choked on his drink and gripped the counter to prevent falling off of the stool.
"Jyushimatsu! Don't… w-wave that thing around so carelessly..! Geez!" It was getting difficult to stay focused on the task at hand, and Oso was stupefied. It was NOT this hard to get Jyushi hammered on a few drinks, so how on earth was he still even slightly sober? Jyushimatsu wiggled one hand out of a sleeve and began petting the tarantula lightly. It relaxed in his hand and suddenly appeared as an innocent creature, rather than a horrifying monstrosity. Funny how that works, he mused.
"It's easy, Nii-san, just pet him like this. He's really soft, too."
He would be lying if he said he wasn't interested in the spider now. He'd also be lying if he said he wasn't curious about how soft the little guy was now. Sure, it looked scary, but up close it actually was almost….
...Fuck it.
Osomatsu reached out and, hesitantly, petted the tarantula. It simply sat in Jyushi's hand and did nothing. No quick movements, no frightening noises, it just… sat there. Jyushimatsu smiled widely and joined his brother as he pet him.
"He likes it! Osomatsu Nii-san, you're his friend now, too!"
The older brother retracted his hand and returned to his beer, an odd grin on his face.
"I guess… Eight Legs isn't TOO bad. He's not gonna win us any points with the chicks, though."
"Nope!"
They both shared a laugh and ordered more drinks, enjoying each other's company and talking about anything and everything. Eventually, Osomatsu fell asleep at the counter, and Jyushimatsu, who was somehow still able to speak coherently and walk in a straight line, hopped off the bar stool and began wandering off with his spider.
The remaining Matsuno brothers watched in disbelief, and the awful realization that this was going to be much harder than they thought finally dawned on them.
