Mary arrived in the dining room in a haze of lavander. Back in the city, the women's perfumes seemed to want to overpower each other, each lady putting on more than the last. Each scent was a demonstration of many things, among them money and social status. But here at Misselthwaite, Mary just felt rather frivolous with her expensive toilet water.
"Yes, put it down just there, that'll be just fine. Thank you. Oh, Mary!" Colin's familiar voice greeted her as she turned into the dining room. He stood beside the long oak table in a beautiful suit and crisp, starched white shirt. His fair hair was combed and parted on the side. There was no inclination of Colin ever being a sickly boy, for now he was lean, but handsome and stable.
"Mary, you look absolutely beautiful," Colin said, smiling broadly and showcasing a lovely set of teeth. "I daresay you have the heart of every man in London and forthwith." He held a hand out to her. Mary took it and stepped closer to this man her frail cousin had become.
"And you, Colin. You look absolutely breathtaking. It's a wonder there aren't more girls swarming around the manor battling for your attentions."
"Wait until the wedding," Colin said, unbuttoning his jacket and tossing it aside. He rolled up the sleeves of his shirt to his elbows. "You'll see them then."
Mary watched him, amused, as he cast aside his dress ware. "It's funny. I always remember Dickon as the one who didn't want to get 'gussied up'. You never used to mind getting all dressed."
"Things have changed." Colin shrugged. "You've been away for a long time,
Mistress Mary."
"I know..." Mary said wistfully. She smiled. "You're so argumentative, Colin. I don't think I've met anyone more so. And you've always been this way. I remember the first time I met you and you started ordering me about...and then complained when I didn't do so."
"I might be argumentative, but you've always been stubborn. To an increasingly annoying point."
"Well, I was right about one thing," Mary said calmly. "You're not dead yet."
"I could die any moment, for all you know." Colin stepped closer with a mocking smile upon his face.
"And I hope you don't," Mary said. She ran her hand along the soft linen of Colin's shirt. "Because I so enjoy our meetings. I so enjoy talking to you."
He smiled. "And I you." He pulled a chair from the table. "Here, sit. Let's eat."
Mary sat and placed a napkin upon her lap, watching as Colin sat nearby. "Speaking of the past..."
"With you it's always speaking of the past," Colin interrupted.
"Because after all these years, it certainly seems to me that I haven't a clue what else we have in common except for our past."
"I'm sure we have lots of things in common." Colin sat back in his chair and folded his hands. "What do you like to do?"
Mary laughed. "That's such an open question. What do I like to do."
"Why is it such a ridiculus question?" Colin demanded.
"Well there are about a thousand things I enjoy!"
"You're being so difficult. And stubborn!" Colin added, laughing. "Alright, I'll start. Do you enjoy reading?"
"Very much," Mary replied. "I've always enjoyed it. Have you?"
"I spent half my early life reading, Mary. Do you remember? All I had to do was sit up there in my bed, or my chair reading or making puzzles or something else horrifically boring," Colin said. "But yes, I do like reading now. But for my own enjoyment, not to pass endless time."
"How do you remember your childhood, Colin?" Mary asked. "Do you remember it as terrible?"
Colin thought for a moment. "No," he replied. "When I think about my earlier childhood and how dreadful it was, I now realize that it was kind of like my payment for having such a good childhood after I met you."
"We helped each other," Mary said. "I was just a sour little girl before I met you and Dickon."
"You were sour-looking as well," Colin added with a laugh. "And look how well you turned out!"
"I could say the very same of you, Colin Craven!" Mary rebuked. "But, in the same way, you've turned out very nicely." She smiled lovingly at her cousin.
For an instant, Mary felt everything in herself disappear. This was the exact moment when she realized that all of their talks when they were younger could indeed come true. The pair of cousins had always spoken quite humorously about their dreams to be married to eachother when they were younger. And now Mary realized that this dream might not be so far away.
But whom had she imagined going home to marry when she was able to return to Misselthwait? Not Colin. She had imagined Dickon.
"Where's Dickon?" Mary asked suddenly.
Colin cleared his throat and moved away to pour himself some wine. "I'm not sure. It doesn't appear that he'll be joining us."
"Not joining us?" Mary asked, confused. "He declined?"
Colin didn't answer, but took a drink from his glass.
"Colin," Mary asked slowly. "Did you even ask Dickon to join us?" There wasn't an answer. "Colin, you didn't even ask did you? Did you?" Anger overwhelmed her. "Why would you deliberately go against my wishes? Why do you hate him so?" She threw down her napkin and stood from the table.
"I don't hate him, Mary. I don't hate him at all. You should know that," Colin said rationally. He remained seated.
"You do. If you didn't, you wouldn't be trying to keep me away from him. You wouldn't be doing this."
"Mary, you're being stupid. Why on earth would I do that? Give me one reason?"
"No, I shouldn't be explaining to you. You should be explaining to me. You should explain why you don't want me to see him. Give me a reason, Colin," Mary demanded.
"I...can't," Colin replied after a moment.
"You see?" Mary said. "You've always been selfish and spoiled and you've turned out the same way. You don't want me to see Dickon because you don't want to share me with him. You want all the attention on yourself."
"You say that, Mary, but you're the one who's making a big commotion, not me," Colin said, standing. "I find you very changed, but I'm not so sure it's in a good way."
"If that's true then why have you been enticed at each beck and call I make?"
"Because you're my cousin, Mary! You are the first person I ever loved in my life and you're my best friend. I will always hold a place for you in my heart. But that doesn't mean that I am attracted to you in other ways. Have you grown so self-centered that you think every man wants to court you?" Colin looked down and calmed his voice. "I have no problem with sharing you with Dickon. All three of us were friends. All three of us loved the Garden. All three of us found something in each other...so could we just please, please," Colin pleaded, "please, let's not fight."
"It's funny," Mary said, shaking her head. "I never thought I'd hear those words from you. But for now, I just want you out of my sight." She turned and walked from the dining room as fast as she could. She could hear Colin calling after her but she never turned back.
She wanted only to go to one place.
