Chapter Four: Big Girls Don't Cry

"The smell of your skin lingers on me now
You're probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection, baby
To be with myself and center
Clarity, peace, serenity

I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do.."

~ "Big Girls Don't Cry" – Fergie

Jason held open the door to the frozen yogurt parlor for Aria as they walked in. By the time Jason had finished working on the heater it had been well after midnight. Spencer had offered him the couch in the living room to sleep on and that morning, Aria had snuck down with Hanna to make breakfast. She was in firm agreement with Hanna that a shirtless Jason was a sight. He'd come into the kitchen wearing nothing, but the jeans from yesterday that were low on his hips.

He'd poured himself a cup of coffee and had left the kitchen mumbling to them that he was getting a shower before they used all the hot water. Spencer had entered the kitchen as he left looking straight ahead. The siblings said nothing to each other. Hanna had laughed as Spencer, just like Jason, had gone straight for the coffee. They might not have looked alike, but Spencer and Jason had some of the same mannerism. It was funny to watch them interact with each other. Breakfast was finished by nine and by eleven thirty everyone was ready to leave. Aria had ridden back to Rosewood with Spencer with plans to meet Jason around three for frozen yogurt.

Stepping into the ice cream shop, Aria had to bite her bottom lip. The ice cream shop was a popular location for the middle schoolers and their 'dates'. The shop was reasonably busy which surprised her. Usually, the shop was deserted in the winter months, but it wasn't. They looked almost out of place among the younger crowd. A few of the younger girls giggled in the corner and pointed at Jason. Aria smiled to herself, they must have thought he was tall and handsome which he was. She could remember being their age and thinking the same thing about him.

"What can I get for you, dear?" the older woman behind the counter asked.

Aria stepped up and smiled, "Could I please have a small cone with vanilla yogurt in a bowl?"

The woman filled their orders quickly and they paid before making their way to a table at the front of the shop between two groups of middle school girls who stared at them and whispered.

"I feel like I'm back in middle school," Jason said taking a bit of his mint chocolate chip yogurt.

"I think we're very out of place. Besides, they think you're a cute older guy. You're like their teenage fantasy."

Jason shook his head, "A girl is a strange creature. More so, when you put them in a group of girls."

Aria raised her eyebrow, "Do you think I'm strange."

"No," he said with a smile. "I think that every girl but you and Spencer is strange."

"Good save."

Jason laughed, "Thanks, I have to agree that it was a good save."


The hour passed pleasantly. Aria barely realized that it was close to four-thirty when her brother texted her asking her to come home. She'd been so engrossed in conversation with Jason that she hadn't been paying attention.

Being with Jason was different. She'd seen a different side to him that she'd never seen. He had a wicked sense of humor and could tell a story unlike anyone. He'd made her laugh more in one hour than she had in the past few months combined. When he'd told her a few stories from college she was sure her sides would ache for the rest of the day. Her favorite story had been about when his roommate, Charlie, had the brilliant idea that to make spare cash he'd teach girls the art of kissing. But when one of the girl's boyfriend found out about it, Charlie had gotten punch in the face and it had swelled so badly that he had to close business. Aria had laughed so hard that she'd cried.

Walking out the door with Jason, Aria smiled at the ground. She liked being with him and just talking. Jason was easy to talk to, to be with, and she enjoyed that. Nothing about it felt awkward. It was light hearted and freeing to sit with him and talk out in the open. Unlocking her car, Aria's smile broadened at the thought of next weekend. Jason along with Toby and Spencer were going to a photography exhibit at the Art Museum in Philly and Jason had given her the forth ticket.

No one could wipe the smile off her face as she pulled away from the curb.


Ezra watched Aria get into her car. He'd seen her inside the ice cream shop with Jason and he couldn't believe that she had been with Jason DeLaurentis. He couldn't understand why she'd want to be with him. Everything he'd heard about Jason DeLaurentis was bad. The guy had been a stoner and a general creep.

So why was Aria with him?

A rational part of him said that it wasn't his business. Why should he care who the hell she dated? A second more irrational part of him said that he loved her and that should be enough reason to go back to her and care.

Shaking his head, Ezra turned his car off. He couldn't be with her. Not when she could cost him everything he'd ever worked for. Jackie was who needed to focus on and the potential future they had together. Watching her pull away he got out of the car and turned seeing Jason DeLaurentis parked behind him.

"Jason," Ezra said hoping the other man hadn't seen him watching Aria. Jason didn't say anything, but gave his usual nod and opened the car door of his Volvo.

It wouldn't be the first time that Ezra would watch Aria leave a place with Jason and it wouldn't be the last. As the month of November passed, Ezra saw Aria with Jason more and more. Rosewood was too small a town to avoid anyone and Ezra kept wishing it was bigger. It was painful to watch Aria with Jason. They would go to exhibits and parties around Rosewood, movies, dinner, sit in coffee shops among this. Each time he saw them, Aria glowed more and more with happiness and while a part of him knew he should be happy for her, Ezra was bitter.

The only thing that added even more to Ezra's bitterness was the silent looks Jason would give to him if they saw each other. With each look, Ezra realized that the looks were those of pity.

Jason DeLaurentis pitied him and it was humiliating.


Opening the door to a coffee shop, Ezra felt nauseated by all the Christmas décor. Everyone was happy and cheerful and he felt miserable. He had been miserable for the past month. Sure, Jackie was a wonderful person and he liked her. He was happy, but it was a false happy. The kind of happy were people smiled and it never quite got to their eyes. Waiting in line, Ezra heard her voice before he saw her from the corner of his eye. Aria walked in from the cold with Jason behind her.

"I'll get the coffee and muffins if you want to get your mom's present," Ezra heard her say.

Jason must have agreed because he let shortly after. He could hear the click of heels on the wooden floors behind him. When the noise stopped, Ezra knew she was behind him. He could smell the raspberries and flowers scent that was her perfume. He would never have picked it out for her but somehow, the scent was hers.

"There you are!" Jackie exclaimed walking over to him. She gave Ezra a dramatic kiss on the lips that was meant to hurt Aria. He was angry, but there was nothing he could do.

"Oh, hello, Aria," Jackie continued. She sounded fake and all three of them knew that Jackie didn't care anything about Aria. Ezra turned around to see her. She was just as beautiful as he always thought. Her hair was shorter from getting it cut and she looked happy.

"Hello, Jackie," she responded politely. "I believe it's your turn."

Ezra turned around to where Aria had pointed and it was indeed their turn. Jackie suddenly brought her hand to her mouth and rushed away.

"Is she alright?" the cashier asked concerned.

"Yeah, it's probably just the bug. Can I have two coffees?"

Ezra paid and stepped aside to the pickup line to let Aria order, "Can I have two coffees and two chocolate chip muffins?"

Aria paid and moved over to stand beside him. Silence filled the space between them. Ezra gulped and desperate to know more opened his mouth.

"How's everything going?" he asked nervously.

Aria turned and looked at him, "Good. Jason and I are going to Philadelphia today. How's work going?"

"Good."

They watched Jackie exit the bathrooms only to turn around and quickly go back in.

"I hope she's okay," Aria mumbled.

"She's been sick for the past week," Ezra replied with a shrug. "Hopefully, some meds will help. I'll drop her off on my way to the book store."

She nodded at him and said nothing. The sound of the bell above the door ringing alerted them both. Jason walked in carrying two bright pink bags. He spotted Aria and walked over.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" she asked.

Jason nodded, "Yep. Did you get chocolate chip muffins?"

"I did. Can you wait in line for me? I'll be right back."

The tall man took her place in line slightly behind Ezra and was silent. Jason DeLaurentis had always seemed friendly to Ezra, but the truth was that the man's continued silence towards him put Ezra on edge.

"Aria said that you're going to Philly," Ezra said trying to ease the uncomfortable silence.

"We are."

"Where are you guys going?"

Ezra knew he'd over stepped his bounds when Jason stiffened.

"We're going to go see a movie with Spencer," Jason finally said as the man behind the counter called that the order with two coffees and two muffins was ready. Jason grabbed their order just as Aria reappeared.

"Ready?" she asked as Jason handed her a cup of coffee.

"Yeah, you?"

Aria nodded and smiled at Ezra, "It was good to see. Have a good holiday."

Watching them leave, Ezra grabbed the coffees he'd ordered and snorted.

What did Aria see in Jason?

Jackie came back looking troubled, "Can we go now?"


It was Christmas Eve and Aria smiled taking a sip of the hot cocoa Jason had gotten her. Walking around the square with him, looking at different ice sculptures, was the most enjoyable thing she'd enjoyable she done in a long time. Standing next to Jason, Aria smiled admiring the enchanted Rose that had been carved symbolizing Rosewood.

"Will you be sad to leave Rosewood?" she asked Jason.

In one of their many conversations, he'd told her that by the beginning of fall next year he'd be in Philly. He'd surprised her even more by saying that he'd decided to go to Law school. Learning that Jason had graduated from college with a degree in Pre-Law and a minor in business had shocked her until Jason had explained to her that he'd gotten the minor in business to please his mother and the bachelors in Pre-Law to piss off his dad.

At the end of college, he agreed to work with his dad to show him that he wasn't cut out for the DeLaurentis business. The truth was that he could run the business just fine, but it wasn't what he wanted to do. So after screwing up on several sites and pissing off some big clients of his dad's, Kenneth DeLaurentis had released him and that same day, Jason had applied for law school and had gotten a letter of acceptance a month later.

"I don't think I'll be sad per say but, I'll have mixed emotions. Did you want to go ice skating? I know this lake out on Starr Road is frozen thick enough for us to skate if you're up to it."

"Do you have skates?"

Jason nodded with a smile, "If you're okay using Allison's old one then yeah, I do have skates."

"Allison skated?" Aria asked surprised.

He laughed, "There's so much between the two of us that we don't know about her. It's kind of sad."

"Okay, let's do it."


Ezra slammed his car door shut.

This wasn't happening. This wasn't happening. He remembered her words leaving her lips perfectly…

I'm pregnant, Ezra. You're going to be a Daddy by next Christmas!

They had to be the two malicious words ever combined with his name coming from Jackie's lips. She couldn't be pregnant! Looking down at the frozen lake from the wooden balcony in the park, Ezra rubbed his eyes. He'd forgotten protection the night Jackie had stayed the night at his apartment. In the heat of the moment, it had slipped his mind and afterwards he'd assumed that she was protected. Kicking the wooden post hard, Ezra swore softly. He was angry as hell at himself and at Jackie.

They were goddamned adults and they forgot about protection.

Taking a deep breath, Ezra cringed when he heard her laughter. Any chance of ever being with Aria had been shot to hell. Looking down, he watched Aria glide across the ice. She called Jason's name and Ezra saw him come out onto the ice in his own skates and pass her.

Aria laughed and followed him.

It was too painful to watch. He wanted to be with her desperately but Ezra knew that with every moment that passed, Aria was farther and farther away from him.


Aria laughed as Jason skated past her. The head lights from his Volvo illuminated the ice where they skated and reflected into the trees. She smiled as Jason skated backwards.

"Show off," she called.

Jason smiled but as he took a turn, slipped and fell face forward.

Aria's heart stopped seeing him fall, "Jason!"

He wasn't moving and she quickly raced over to him. Kneeling down, she put her hand on his back and called his name again. Thinking fast, Aria used her weight to push Jason over and hit his chest hard as he laughed.

"That wasn't funny," she snapped at him. "I really thought you were hurt. You scared me."

"I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. You should have seen the look on your face."

Aria looked genuinely upset and without thinking, Jason leaned up and kissed her. It surprised her for a moment but she quickly returned it. His lips were soft and warm but with firmness to it that Aria could barely understand, but wanted to know more about. His leather gloved hand cupped the back of her neck while the other one snaked around her waist. She wondered what else he could do with his hands and lips as she cupped his cheeks.

Just as soon as the kiss began, it felt like it was over. Pulling back, they both panted. Her eyes could leave his and she found herself wanting to kiss him again and again until the end of time. There was just something about his kiss.

"I'm sorry, I scared you."

"Don't do it again," Aria said breathlessly.

"Have dinner with me on New Year's Eve," Jason said quietly. "Be my girl at midnight so can kiss you and know your all mine."

"Only if you promise to only be mine," Aria whispered back smiling as she leaned back to kiss him again.

"I will always be yours," he mumbled right before his lips met hers again in a soft, unhurried kiss.

Aria couldn't remember ever being so happy on Christmas Eve.


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