At the first village they entered, Gahri immediately felt like everyone was watching them. It reminded him of his days back in primary school when the students sometimes put on plays and he had to get up there in front of everybody's parents and families. No matter how he worked to memorize his lines, they always flew right out of his head once he marched onstage. This was just as nerve-wracking.

His legs were shaking, and he had to force himself to keep walking down the dirt lane that led deeper into town. Behind him the rest of the crocodile gang were bunched together in their purchased uniforms, darting nervous glances around at the villagers. Can't let the guys see I'm rattled. If I crack, they will too! Sheesh, was Fung always under this sort of pressure? Certainly explains his bad attitude.

Curious people stopped in their tracks to watch this unusual procession. At last they stood at the center of the small hamlet. Surrounded. With no choice but to fight their way out if this didn't work. Gahri stepped forward, holding tight to the fake seal at his belt. Remember to project your voice, just like old Mrs. Bai used to tell us before rehearsal.

"Attention, citizens!"

He now had everyone's attention, all right. Including some rough-looking mercenaries lounging outside a restaurant. Water buffalo, they were heavily armed and mean as they come. The crocs' spears and axes appeared paltry by comparison to those razor-sharp war implements. Focus, Gahri! Focus! He then held aloft the painted seal for all to see.

"Do not be alarmed! The time has come for annual tax collection! We are the imperial tax collectors, here to collect taxes! Will the village headman please present himself for our inspection?"

All was quiet. Behind him he could hear rattling and whispering from the other crocs. Did I forget something? Get their attention… explain why we're here and who we are… ask for the guy in charge. Check, check, and check!

"Excuse me?"

Gahri gave a yelp and leapt back, snatching at the handle of his sword in desperation. Before him there stood a plump old goat with a long beard and thick lips. He was chewing on a pipe stem while peering at the reptilian actor through thick spectacles. To either side of him loomed two hefty hogs with grim expressions. Where did they come from? Must've spaced out. Convulsively he thrust out his phony seal as though it were a shield, at the same time squawking, "Wh-who goes there?"

The elderly goat leaned forward and examined the seal in front of his nose, eyes lingering over every curve for what felt like a maddeningly long amount of time. Meanwhile Gahri found he couldn't move a single muscle. This fragile bit of clay was their only defense. He can tell it's a fake, I can see it in his eyes! We're gonna die, we're gonna die, we–

"Forgive me for startling you. I am Mayor Kui. Be welcome in our village, honorable sirs."

Huh?

The goat clicked his big yellow teeth and shuffled to one side. The pair of pigs stepped forth, revealing that they held between them a great banded box which they settled on the ground. Kui produced a key and inserted it into the lock. In the stillness there came a click followed by a loud creak.

Revealed within was a mound of coins, both shiny new and dulled with age.

The mayor came back around, now holding a rolled paper scroll. "Forgive any discourtesy, noble sirs," he bleated crisply. "We were not expecting you for several more days. But I have prepared the necessary information all the same. Here is a record of our last seven years of taxes along with a head count for every resident." Kui then proffered the scroll with a deep bow. "Long live the Emperor."

"Th-thank you."

Gahri accepted the scroll, quivering like a leaf in the wind. Around him the watching crowds had resumed their previous routine. "Always so antsy, every year," he heard one old sheep disclaim irascibly to another before returning to their game of mahjong. The mercenary buffalo went back to eating without so much as a glance in their direction.

Stunned to still be breathing, Gahri gaped at the goat, then turned back to his fellows. They were all staring at him. Wall-Eye, Irwin, even little Wong. The world swam before his eyes so that he feared he might faint. What is this feeling? Not just relief, it's more like elation and… pride!

Is this what it feels like to win? Huh. Not bad.


Master Shifu and Crane stood together on the edge of the cliff-side crevasse known as the Grotto of the Sky Dragon. Unreachable save by a torturous mountain path or those blessed with wings, the grotto was a peaceful place presided over by a huge beautiful stone dragon carved from the surrounding rock, perfect for meditation and contemplation. Spread out from the edge of the cliff before them, a thick blanket of fog covered the whole Valley of Peace. The night sky was beginning to lighten. Dawn would soon be upon them. Neither master spoke, only watched the sluggish mists churn at their feet like the ocean waves lapping at the shore.

After a while Shifu's large ears perked up. He turned his head, and Crane followed suit. Now he too could detect a strange sound in the early morning air. It was a combination of squeaks, pops and growls, and it was steadily drawing closer. Unnerved in spite of himself, the heron took a protective step closer to his teacher. For his part the master of the Jade Palace merely waited.

Out in the gray fog sea, something crested the mist. It bobbed and struggled as though swimming through the heavy precipitation. At first this odd sight appeared to be zeroing in on their position. Then it veered off and headed farther down the path leading to the grotto. The contraption disappeared into the mists soon after. However it was not two minutes later before they both heard the sound of footsteps coming towards them.

As the heavens continued to brighten, two squat shadows emerged from the mist. They ascended the path together. The larger one offered a hand to help get over a particularly large rock, but this was met by a snort of contempt and some disagreeable language. The two argued for a time before finally settling down and continuing the climb.

At last all of them stood on the same level, separated by the bend of the grotto's crystal clear pond. It was Shifu who broke the strained silence. "Thank you for coming, Taotie."

"Hmph!" The warthog inventor squinted his piggy eyes viciously. "Lucky for you that I did, Shifu!" Beside him his teenage son Bian Zao appeared more tired than bored. He yawned loudly, head drooping as he held a long wooden box cradled to his chest.

Crane's eyes narrowed at the sight of their lumpy foe. He had been warned what to expect, but a part of him still could not quite believe that anything good could come from this. Taotie had tried to destroy the Furious Five on any number of occasions. His brand of mechanical mischief had proven fiendishly difficult to overcome in the past. Even knowing the reason, if they were turning to such a cunning opponent for aid now, would the outcome be any different?

"I read the account Master Oogway left," Shifu continued. He looked in no way perturbed to be sharing breathing space with his disgraced classmate and self-avowed nemesis. "According to this, he contacted you regarding a certain… incident in the past."

"Don't waste my time any more than you already have!" Taotie snapped. He swept out a hoof and leveled it at Master Crane. "What's he doing here? Planning to turn on me as soon as I've served my purpose, eh? Well, you won't find the great Taotie unprepared, Shifu! Behold!" One arm whipped behind his back and emerged with something resembling a series of war fans attached to the end of an umbrella. "Tremble in fear before my Whirling Vortex of Excruciating Torm–!"

"Da-a-a-d!" Bian Zao exclaimed in a miserable tone, rolling his head in exasperation. "It's too early for the hokey vengeance speeches! Can we just do this so I can go home and crawl back into bed? I haven't even had breakfast yet!"

The warty mechanist's face took on a comically aggrieved shade as he rounded on his offspring. "What were you doing in your room the whole time I was getting ready? If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times, breakfast is the most important meal of the day! I didn't slave over building a hot griddle pancake flipping machine for nothing, you know!"

Father and son fell to arguing. Crane had spread his wings in readiness to go on the assault, but now both he and Shifu could only watch the family feud take place. It was getting so raucous he seriously feared them waking up the whole Valley with their bickering.

"Ahem!" the small red panda coughed as politely as he could. "I must agree with Bian Zao. Can we possibly speed this up?"

Both warthogs broke off to stare at him. Eventually they exchanged glances which might have passed for a truce, after which Taotie came back around. "Fine, then. Come and take it."

Without hesitation Shifu stepped forward. Hesitantly Crane followed at his back, alert for any sign of treachery on the perfidious pig's part. The two kung fu masters halted in front of their counterparts. Crane and Taotie scowled at one another, but Bian Zao simply held out the wooden box which Shifu accepted. He opened it to inspect the contents. As he did, his eyebrows shot up into his scalp. Wordlessly he glanced at the genius inventor in search of an explanation.

Taotie took note of his confusion and offered a haughty, "Hmph! Not sure what to do with it, or even what it is? So much for meditating all day to uncover the secrets of the universe! You can't even contemplate something so simple as this beautiful piece of craftsmanship!"

"What is it?" Crane asked before he could stop himself, reaching in and hooking a talon on the object to draw it out.

"Yeah, Dad, what is it?" the younger warthog echoed. "Looks like a kite that's been put through the Wringer, that clothes-drying doohickey you made that ate my best shorts."

His father looked between him and the two masters in exasperation. "Here." He reached out and carefully retrieved the object in question. "This is a precision instrument, not to be handled indelicately. If the situation is as grave as Oogway led me to believe, it might just be the only thing that can save the Valley."

"Taotie," Shifu asked quietly. "What did Oogway ask of you?"

The blustery outcast looked at him, then down at his invention. When he spoke next his voice had taken on a measure of reflection they had never heard before.

"Years ago, Master Oogway came to visit me in secret. Needless to say I was surprised, considering he had exiled me from the Jade Palace! But the old boy soon made it clear why. He explained what transpired with your Master Viper, and what it cost him to bring the situation to a close. Oogway worried that if it ever happened again, he might not be around to stop it. And for all that I resented him and his blind obsession with kung fu… I could tell he was worried about what might happen to the people who lived here if that did prove to be the case."

"What do you care? You've come after us plenty of times," Crane spoke accusingly.

The warthog's eyes flashed as he lifted his head to regard the tall bird. "For your information, my beef lies with Shifu and his disciples, not the residents of this valley! Maybe you haven't been paying attention, but the purpose behind my devices is to give folks who lack naturally strong physiques a chance to triumph in battle even if they can't quite master Southern Fist or Shaolin style!" His bristly chin came up proudly. "I'm as much a defender of the people as you are!"

"Please continue, Taotie," Shifu pressed before they actually started fighting. "You were saying about Viper…?"

"Yes… yes." He looked back to his invention. "Since no one among you could employ Master Oogway's method, he prevailed upon me to construct a non-fatal mechanical alternative. Mind you, this was new territory for me. I had only ever done a cursory study of chi and chakra points up 'til then, and the results weren't promising."

The villainous pig's eyes turned cloudy. "But maybe… just maybe, a small part of me still hungered for Oogway's approval." He glanced up to see if anyone would deride him for this admission. When no one did, not even his son who could usually be counted on for nothing else, Taotie gave a self-conscious sniff and soldiered on. "And I was curious how something like this might be countered. So I researched. I traveled. I spoke to members of the snake clan. None of them had ever heard of a chi venom like this before. Possibly for the simple reason that it didn't exist until now. But after discussing the problem with them, I managed to formulate a theory of how to deal with it."

"When did you do all this, anyway?" Bian Zao asked. "I don't remember you being gone for very long."

Taotie rounded on him. "You don't remember that time you went to live with your cousins in Wuxi? I was gone for six months!"

"Ohhh… that. They told me you were in jail for tax evasion."

"Unreported income does not need to be disclosed on…! Never mind." He glanced around skittishly as though expecting imperial enforcers to leap out at him. "Now then… I believe the chi energy which Viper produces is part of her normal bodily rhythm. It builds up in her naturally in benign form until she experiences intense mental agitation, which results in an imbalance that activates the poisonous heritage. At this stage the process becomes cyclical, her negative emotions feeding on and in turn being fed by this toxic chi. She then releases the stored venom until her reserves have been drained, which clears her chakra points and allows for the natural cycle to resume. And that's where this comes in."

Taotie held up his creation. It resembled a long silk sleeve that had been slit down the middle. Thin bands of copper running up and down it like a ribcage gave it shape, all connected to small gears here and there. Seven small copper capsules were arranged in a line along this setup, inside each of which was a spherical lump of pure quartz. At one end there was a small leather hood atop which rested the last of the seven nodes. To either side of it there appeared to be two folded metal fans that slid open slightly under the pull of gravity. It really did look like a limp kite, Crane reflected, the type popular among the children of the valley these days.

"Behold!" Taotie thundered. "My 'Great Chariot Purity Cowl'!" He paused to wait for the inevitable praise.

"Great Chariot?" Bian Zao snorted, his shoulders shaking. "What's up with that name, Dad?"

"If you think a little it makes perfect sense! See, it has seven nodes in a line just like the constellation, and its purpose is to help carry off bad chi, and… oh, never mind!"

Flustered, the mechanic bent back to explaining the device. Despite any reservations they all drew closer to listen and examine. "Energy is energy, whether created by the living body or nature. This design is intended to encase the target and prevent them from moving while the chi is being extracted. These ampules," here he pointed out the quartz marbles, "are stationed along the chakra points for a snake of Viper's size. Attach this to her with the top node on her forehead and activate it."

Taotie pressed a switch near the hood. Immediately the Cowl contracted on itself to form a tube. The copper housing of each node noticeably tightened, while the two metal fans spread out. The whole thing began to vibrate, and a high-pitched humming emanated from the fan blades.

"The poison chi will be converted inside the nodes and passed along to these two wings, which will then disperse it as harmless sound energy. Once Viper has been rid of her venom, you can remove it by pressing the same switch."

Fascinated, Crane dipped his beak down to get a better look, at which point Taotie jerked it away. "Don't touch!" he warned. "This isn't a toy! If you make contact with the nodes while they're active, you'll definitely get a slight shock, about as strong as the kind you get from rubbing wool and putting your hand on something metal. But if it's attached to Viper, for all we know you might actually draw her venom into your body. So have some respect when handling this!" With that he deactivated the Purity Cowl and replaced it inside the box, snapping it shut and standing back. "That's all you need to know."

"She will not be harmed in any way?" Shifu pressed.

"Not if you use it properly. On that you have my word," the hog huffed, crossing his arms and smirking. "Not that I will be anywhere close to see it and gloat either way!"

"Right." Crane inclined his head. "About that…"

In a flash his long leg sped out and caught Taotie by the throat, lifting him slightly off the ground to dangle choking and kicking.

"If this hurts Viper," he said in a calm voice, "I will fly you into the sky and drop you."

With that he let go before either Shifu or Bian Zao could draw breath to shout.

"On that you have my word."

Taotie hit the ground but almost immediately scrambled upright. "You…!" Hooves clenched, the wily warthog looked ready to go for the weapon strapped to his back. Instead he visibly relaxed, and a sneer caused his tusked lips to twist. "You had better hope it works." Then, to an anxious-looking Bian Zao, "Let's go!"

"Taotie."

Father and son turned to see Shifu still holding the box.

"I am sorry. And thank you," the old sage spoke quietly.

"Hmph!" his former classmate sniffed before trotting off with Bian Zao at his side. A few moments later there was another popping and whirring of gears as a vaguely mechanical shape launched itself from the cliff with its two passengers and disappeared into the gray sea.

"I understand your concern, Crane," Shifu said as they listened to that flapping contraption grow ever more distant. "But like it or not, Taotie has given us our best hope. The question of whether we can trust him is one only time can answer."

Crane gave a roll of his eyes. "I think the real question here is whether or not it will work at all."

Shifu made no response, which left his student even more troubled. They took themselves off to the Jade Palace then without speaking.

Elsewhere in the gradually diminishing morning mist, Bian Zao looked back at the mountain already swallowed up in fog and turned to his father. "Hey, Dad?"

"What?" Taotie grumbled, never taking his eyes off what lay ahead of them as he operated the controls. "This is dangerous weather for flying, don't distract me!"

"Yeah. I mean…" The teenager hesitated, uncertain if he should continue. Oh, what the heck. "I just wanted to say it was pretty cool of you. To help those guys out, I mean. Even with everything that's happened between you."

He did not respond at first, so that Bian Zao thought he wouldn't. But after a few seconds the older pig said in a resolute voice, "If you should dedicate your life to something, son, never forget the reason why you're doing it. Otherwise you risk becoming a fanatic."

Bian Zao couldn't tell if his father was being intentionally ironic or not. At length he just decided to keep his eyes peeled so that they didn't run into a mountain in this fog. That would not be cool.


"Fung," Po wheezed, "my legs… are cramping… let's stop for a… rest."

"Quit… complaining!" the croc snapped. "And don't you dare… drop it! Just a few more… flights!"

Together the unlikely allies hauled a large wooden crate up the seemingly endless steps leading to the Jade Palace. They had been forced to take the long way around town at Fung's insistence. Why his gang couldn't possibly lend a hand had been mentioned by Po, to which the head bandit admitted he had completely forgotten about them. The question of where they might be was answered with, "I dunno." By then it was too late. They were both in this up to their necks, and there was no turning back.

At last, lungs heaving, muscles shaking, they crested the final step, Fung staggering forward a few paces while Po joined him on the landing. "Okay," the lethargic lizard hacked and coughed, "just set it down nice and easy. Nice and… easy." With equivalent groans the exhausted pair managed to bend their knees without buckling, and the cushioned crate soon rested securely on the ground. With that they both flopped down to join it, relief the only emotion possible.

To the panda's horror Fung hopped up in less than a minute. "Okay, final stretch! Let's get moving!"

Po wanted to protest. Or die as a form of protest. To his own dismay the Dragon Warrior found himself calling on some inner reserves of strength and fortitude that might conceivably be needed at a later date in his life to defeat some insidious evil force but would now instead be squandered hauling furniture. With that he rose to grasp the hideously heavy box once more. Together he and Fung lifted it up and hauled that weighty burden past the doors and into the central plaza.

"Wait… wait, Fung! I'm gonna… pass… out…"

"Hey, darn it, NO!"

Too late, the panda collapsed. Expecting to hear the awful sound of his dreams shattering, Fung was surprised that this did not prove to be the case. When he cast a look over one shoulder, it was to find Monkey grinning at him while holding up the other end.

"Let's set this down, eh?" the saucy simian suggested. Fung complied, and in moments his treasure was nestled safely on its bottom end. Monkey took a step back and wiped his brow. "Phew! That's not clouds and butterfly wings you've got in there, to be sure. So what is it?"

"Yes, Fung. What have you brought today?"

He whirled about to be confronted by not only Viper, but Tigress with Mantis perched on her shoulder. "It's a… surprise!" He indicated towards Viper. "For you."

"Oh, you don't say?" she hissed teasingly while slithering closer to him. "Do I have to wait for my birthday, or will you let me have a little peek?"

"Okay!" Eager to please as a puppy, Fung grasped one side of the crate and tugged until it came open. Bundles of dried grass fell out which he cleared away before reaching in to grasp hold of something. "You ready?"

"I'm on my tiptoes."

"Shah, right!" he snorted, then gave a grunt as he lifted something out and set it carefully down for all to see. "Ta-dah!"

Viper raised up a little higher, cocking her head in surprise. Before her there rested a pyramidal object capped with a wide bowl and made entirely of baked bright red clay. Some three feet tall and one foot square at the base, around its tapering height there ran a deep groove etched into which was a pattern similar to the scales of a snake. This indentation ascended all around to reach the top where it entered a small hole in the base of the bowl.

When she looked at him inquiringly, Fung leapt to explain. "You remember how you said people are always tripping over you when you're taking a nap? Well, I figured if you had something eye-catching to sleep on that wouldn't happen! See, you can slide up it around here," he traced a claw around the groove that encircled his artwork, "slip in through this hole and take a nap high up where nobody can step on you! There's a bump in the base of the bowl so when you coil around it your head will be raised and you can see over the edge. I can make more of them, and then we set them around the Palace so whenever you're feeling sleepy you can zip over to the closest one and have a snooze! Waddaya think?"

With a wild exclamation of joy, Viper tackled him, sending the shocked reptile tumbling backwards with her coiling around his neck.

"Fung!" she exclaimed happily. "This is the sweetest, most thoughtful thing I have ever seen!" Her tongue flashed out to tickle his chin in delight. "Is this what you've been working on for the past few days?"

"Aww," the croc gave a pleasant shiver and propped himself up on his elbows. "I had to keep myself occupied since you're back on the job now. Otherwise I'd just be sitting around thinking about how I wish you were with me instead."

Viper waved into his field of vision for just a moment before darting in and wrapping her whole body around his neck in a fierce hug. For a moment everyone watching took note of how his eyes bugged out briefly at this impassioned squeeze play. Then he reached up and patted her smooth scales with utmost gentleness. The serpentine warrior relaxed, hissing contentedly, and he emitted a soft chuckle.

Unbeknownst to either of them, Tigress glanced at Monkey with one eyebrow raised. He responded with a helpless shrug. Mantis appeared on guard, while Po remained passed out a few feet off.

"See, I carved a little ball of wood so it had the pattern of your scales on it," Fung was explaining. "Then I drilled a hole through it, and pushed in a wire loop attached to a handle that I normally use for clay carving. That way it could roll around, and I used it to make that snakeskin pattern in the groove. I had to do some experiments to see just how deep I needed to make the pattern so it didn't get lost during the firing. But it really worked out great, don't you think?"

His serpentine sweetheart nuzzled against one cheek. "That settles it. You are definitely coming with me to the festival this week."

"Ah, well, about that…"

They fell to arguing happily about their future plans. Meanwhile Viper's companions had drawn off a few paces to confer together. "Have you heard any word about the gang?" Tigress murmured.

"Not a peep," Monkey breathed while keeping an eye on their scaly partner. "I went by Fung's place to scout around, but they weren't anywhere to be seen. His Mom didn't know where they were either. Nice lady! I caught some fish for her from the river, and she gave me dumplings." He clapped his feet together and grinned. "Yum-yum!"

"Everything seems to be going well for them." Peering around the curve of Tigress' fur, Mantis regarded the happy couple with a somewhat disconsolate air. He heaved a sigh and shook his head. "Y'know, I get how dangerous this is. But darn it all, those two go well together! Can't we be a little happy for Viper? Not like the rest of us are that successful when it comes to love."

"Your idea of romantic good fortune is getting your head chewed off," his feline perch declared.

"It's the mantis way," he shrugged resignedly. "So… shall we make sure Po's still breathing?"

"I suppose."


Fung's plan had been a good plan. A very good plan. But in hindsight, there was one factor they had not taken into consideration when they first decided to dress up as tax collectors.

And that would be the bandits.

After their third village, when they were riding high and feeling good about themselves for what felt like the first time ever, Gahri and company were set upon by a gang of raccoons. Attempting to explain that they were fellow thieves engaged in an ingenious and daring act of subterfuge didn't seem to make a bit of difference to their brethren. They lost half their take on that one. Then came the flying squirrels dive-bombing them, followed by the wolf bandits in the middle of the night. And the hits just kept on coming.

Now battered, disoriented, jumpy, and completely robbed of every last honest red cent they had managed to fleece from the previous six towns, Gahri led his cohorts limping into a pleasant little settlement. He had no idea where they were, having spent so much time running the past few days it could very well be a town they had already visited.

But that didn't matter at this stage. He was ragged and sore, just about ready to admit defeat. Only one thing kept him going, the only thing this lousy clay badge in his pocket was still good for. And that was getting a free meal at the first restaurant they came across. They might have to go home empty-handed, but they would not do so with empty bellies! Not if he had anything to say about it!

The smell of food drew him along until they reached a small café. Throwing open the doors, Gahri marched in with little consideration for their surroundings. The place was not even half full despite it being late in the afternoon, and he chose the nearest unoccupied table to plop down. His fellow worn-out reptiles followed suit. There came a great deal of anxious clamor from the back of the room at their entrance, but none of it roused his interest.

"Can we get some food over here?" the bandit lieutenant bellowed.

Moments later a young sheep waitress came bustling up. She looked over their ragged clothes and dinged-up weapons with a certain degree of wariness. "What can I get for you, gentlemen?"

"The specialty of the house, all around. And some fresh tea. And don't forget the rocks!"

He recognized that he was being rude, but by now Gahri was feeling sufficiently unappreciated by life that the only thing which could make it any better was to spread the misery around. Settling his elbows on the table, he rubbed his temples to suppress the stress headache which had cost him any hope of slumber these past couple of nights. After a few seconds, however, he noticed the waitress was still just standing there.

"What?!" he snapped.

She fidgeted before taking on a resolute air and stating, "I don't mean to offend, but… we've had reports of bandits in the vicinity…"

"Yeah, no kidding," Gahri grumbled. His crew echoed this sentiment, nursing their sore spots forlornly.

"So I thought I would inquire," the waitress continued, "how you would be paying?"

Turning a cross glower on her, the frustrated crocodile was immensely pleased at the way she shrank away. He then quickly stood up, reached into his uniform and produced the clay seal. "See this?" he proclaimed in a ringing voice that carried the length of the room. "We are imperial tax collectors, charged with administering the law in this province! And you dare ask us for money?! So before we collect what you and everyone in this puny hamlet owes, you are going to bring us our food! And if you don't like it, we can just close this business for obstructing an officer in performance of his duties! Do I make myself clear?!"

He had expected her to apologize and go scuttling off. Instead Gahri was mildly distressed when the young lamb just stood there giving him a very odd look. What's her deal?

In the stillness following his proclamation, the sound of a chair scraping across the floor carried quite clearly.

"Ah… would you care to repeat that, please?"

Gahri looked up. At the other end of the room, in a darkened corner, a rooster had risen from his seat. His feathers were glossy black, his costly robe the same, and he wore an expensive sword tucked into a purple and green sash. A dozen other cocks dressed in similar design stood with their leader. As he stepped forward, a wooden seal on a silk band swung at his waist. It bore a very familiar design.

Upon recognizing it, Gahri felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. Oh no.

Wong was tugging insistently at his sleeve. The waitress bolted towards the kitchen. At the same time, Tuk Luk drew his sword and leveled it at the bewildered group of crocs.

"CHARGE!" he crowed, and the furious flock swept towards them with weapons drawn.


Some kids went dashing by laughing and waving sparklers. A few feet away a string of small fireworks exploded with colorful flashes on the ground, sending adults and delighted children scrambling backwards and filling the air with smoke. A pig selling kites from a stall shouted warningly against setting his goods ablaze even as a gander purchased two colorful examples for her son and daughter.

Po settled down a crate of terra cotta figurines and stood with a groan, stretching his back to ease out any kinks. He smiled at the sight of all the preparations for tomorrow's festivities. The Valley of Peace really came alive during festivals, and he was glad to contribute to that air of contentment.

"I don't know if the hat's gonna be enough," Fung declared beside him while nervously stacking some more clay charms and bowls. Wearing a robe and sporting a straw hat whose brim shadowed his eyes, he quickly ducked down behind his stall so that he was out of sight of any pedestrians. "Could you not stand so close, Po? People are looking over this way, I can feel it! If they recognize me, I'm dead!"

"Well, maybe if you stopped acting like a fugitive on the run, you might not feel like one anymore. I mean, come on! Nobody's looking at you."

Fireworks exploded behind him, and he spun with a yelp, heart pounding. A few more kids ran past exhorting one another to hurry. Po forced himself to relax. Maybe this wasn't the best idea, having Fung open a stall to sell his homemade goods during the festival. But it was Viper's, and trying to convince her otherwise could involve delving into areas of conversation best left avoided. She had charmed the unwitting croc into agreeing to this scheme. Only after she was out of sight did that dopey grin he had been wearing metamorphose into abject shock, and Po found himself being shaken back and forth in a frenzy. Once again it fell to him to save the day. Not the worst mission ever… but close.

"So can we really leave all this here overnight?" Fung asked while examining the boxes containing his craft. "It took me three days to make. What's to keep somebody from stealing it?"

"Uh, hello?" the Dragon Warrior drawled. "Are you maybe starting to realize how normal folks feel when their stuff gets filched? Besides this isn't a den of thieves, it's my hometown! We're good people here."

"I don't like the way those hoods are eyeing my goods." The croc peered mistrustfully towards a group of children absorbed in playing with their dolls on the street corner. Then his eyes flew wide. "Oh darn… what if they recognize me?! What if they know who I am and were sent to spy on me?! What if–?!"

"Will you quit it?!" Po hissed as he slammed the box down on the stall. "You're making me a nervous wreck! My stomach's all tied up in knots, I'm worn out from hauling pottery, and if I don't get some food in me soon, I might just shrivel up and die!"

"Sounds like I came just in time."

When he looked down it was to find a basket of hot steaming zongzi being presented to him. Po heaved a grateful sigh and grabbed several of these offerings to stuff them in his mouth without even bothering to remove the bamboo leaf wrappers. The box lowered to reveal Viper smiling up at him with their lunch balanced atop her tail. "You saved my life!" her chubby comrade declared between mouthfuls.

"Sheesh, didn't your Dad teach you any manners?" Fung snapped as he came around the stall. "Ladies first, Po!"

"Go easy on him." Viper settled the box on a nearby bench and sprang atop it to get out of the villagers' footpath. She selected some fried fish balls on a skewer from their picnic lunch and lifted it out. "We have been taking advantage of his good nature these past few days. Thanks again for helping us set this up, Po." She ducked her head gracefully, blue eyes sparkling with fond humor.

"Yeah. Okay. Thanks, and all." Fung settled in beside her, but couldn't resist adding, "Although this does help explain why you're still single at your age, guy."

"Come on, that's it." Viper slithered off her seat with a sigh, causing her boyfriend to leap right up in response. "You have been working too hard. Let's stroll through town and watch the festival preparations together."

"But… my stuff! What if somebody steals it?"

"That won't happen. Po will keep an eye on things." She took a bite of her treat and swished along still chewing. "Right, Po? We'll leave the lunch basket for you."

Her panda guardian hesitated, torn between his stomach and a need to keep things safe. Movement atop a nearby building caught his eye. Briefly Monkey's head came over the roof and he gave a thumbs-up. Po got the message. "That sounds good," and he flopped down on the bench with a sigh of relief, already hugging the mouthwatering goody bag to his chest. "Take your time. Plenty to see."

"Bye, then!" The look Viper gave him held a large measure of gratitude as they sidled off. It dawned on Po that he might have just helped without even knowing it. Letting them spend some time in each other's company without an obvious tagalong? That might be healthy. Two's company, and three's a crowd.

"Po!" a plaintive voice cried, and he looked down. The triangular treats were hopping inside the basket, their tops opening and closing in agitation. "Feast on us, Dragon Warrior! Fulfill the cosmic meaning of our existence in the way only you can! Give purpose to our beings inside your belly! Eat us, Po! EAT US!"

Well, if it's my duty. So resolved, he got to work.


For perhaps the first time in their relationship, Fung and Viper found themselves alone together. Well, as much as you could be in a big crowd of people all fussing and bustling over themselves. They ambled aimlessly through the streets watching stalls selling masks and tiny boats be set up. It was a windy day and the local children were taking advantage of this auspicious weather to fly kites. Colorful paper toys painted with images of dragons, tigers and phoenixes soared in creative aerial displays across the clear blue sky.

Viper was pleased to note how relaxed Fung seemed to be. Up 'til now he was always on pins and needles when it came to being seen in public. That was partly the reason she suggested he set up a booth this year. It would get him out in the community and, incidentally, help him make a living. Festivals were the best time for craftsmen to sell their wares. She knew how some people responded to reptiles like them, and it was clear he had suffered some bad experiences in the past. But now that she was here, there would be nothing that could hurt him. Viper had resolved to make him a part of every aspect in her life.

Was she rushing things? They had only been together a few weeks, and already she caught herself fantasizing about taking him to meet her parents. That's normal, though. And… he made her happy.

"Hey, watch it!"

She snapped out of her daydream to see Fung come between her and a pig rushing down the street. The urgent ungulate recoiled back from his outstretched arm and gaped at the big crocodile glowering down a mouth full of teeth at him. His eyes then drifted lower as he spied Viper. "Oh! Master Viper! I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there!"

"It's fine," she laughed it off. Viper then reached up to tug on Fung's robe with her tail. "Really, I'm fine," she sought to reassure him.

He glanced at her, then nodded in acceptance. Looking back at the cowering pig Fung growled, "You should be more careful."

"I will! Sorry, it's just… sorry!" With that he went barreling past them.

Viper noticed something then. There seemed to be an awful lot of people moving in the same direction as that pig with great haste. Was something going on? Could anybody have gotten hurt? Resolved to investigate, she slithered up before Fung. "Looks like there's something in the works. Come on, let's go see what the fuss is about."

A few minutes later they were at the center of town where a large crowd had gathered. The press of bodies made it hard to discern what might be the cause. Viper took note of an unoccupied bench near a wall by a post decorated with tassels. She again tugged on Fung's robe to get his attention, and when he looked she indicated towards the spot. He caught on quickly. The two of them headed over out of the main mass of onlookers. Fung hopped upon the bench while Viper slithered up the pole to get a better view. The tall croc could now easily see over the heads of the crowd. Now, what could be…?

"CITIZENS!" a loud voice crowed. "PLEASE STAY BACK FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY!"

Fung gave a start. He knew that squawky voice! Now able to view the whole panorama, this was confirmed by the sight of Tuk Luk, the rooster tax collector. He was surrounded by his agitated assistants who were darting their bright red combs around at the crowd, looking like they were at the center of a squad of assassins rather than curious townsfolk. More roosters manned the cart which held their treasure boxes. And close to this…

"No!" Fung breathed.

A large barred prison carriage loomed gray and forbidding in the noonday sun. It was this that had drawn the crowd's interest. For there, hands and feet shackled in wooden blocks, sat his gang.

Their uniforms were torn, and he had never seen them look so utterly crestfallen. Their heads hung in shame as they were put on display for all to see. Some sported crude bandages. He quickly did a head count and was relieved to find everyone was present. Thank goodness. At least none of them were dead. Now to the bigger question: how did this HAPPEN?!

"You see before you a motley assortment of the most deplorable scum imaginable!" Tuk Luk's shout rang through the air. "This lawless band of miscreants," here he whacked the cage with his sheathed sword, causing the prisoners to flinch and cower, "have actually dared to impersonate royal officers and duped poor unsuspecting townsfolk into handing over the annual tribute lawfully owed to your Emperor!"

The rooster flapped his wings and leapt atop the cage, stalking from one iron bar to another. "We have apprehended these villains and are transporting them back to the capital, where they shall be brought before the very law which they so flagrantly defied! Rest assured," here Tuk Luk drew himself up short. "I intend to see to it that these vicious vagabonds are punished with nothing short of DEATH!"

People in the crowd murmured or shouted encouragement. Fung could neither speak nor think. His breath came very fast, and only one word rang through his mind. Death. Death. Death.

Right then, as though alerted by his thoughts, Gahri lifted his head and looked straight at him.

They both blinked upon meeting one another's eyes. Fung's mouth opened, but he caught himself choking back the words. They stared at each other. The shouts of the mob diminished to nothing. It was just the bandit leader and his captured lieutenant.

Sitting beside Gahri, little Wong noticed him looking at something and followed his gaze. Upon spotting Fung his face lit up, and he turned to address the other crocs. Before he could, though, Gahri's cuffed hands came down on his shoulder. When Wong glanced at him questioningly, he simply shook his head. The midget crocodile didn't appear to know what to make of this, but he obeyed his superior's example. Some of the others who also followed this exchange took note and did the same. None of them made a sound.

Gahri looked towards his friend and leader one more time and gave a slow, sad nod. There was a look on his face that said it all. Then he turned his head away. Fung felt his blood run cold.

He knew what that look meant.

They were saying goodbye.

"Oh, Fung. I'm so sorry."

Lost and shaken, he turned to find Viper hovering by his shoulder. The beautiful serpent watched him with sad heartfelt eyes. "You shouldn't have to see this," she stated sympathetically. "I know they're bandits but that doesn't change the fact that they're your own kind. Trust me, I understand what you're going through. Come on," and she flowed down the pole. "Let's get out of here."

Fung took one last look at the imprisoned gang. All of them studiously avoided meeting his eyes. A sob welled up in his throat. Choking, he hopped down and allowed her to lead him away from there.


"Are you sure you won't stay?" Viper pressed him as they stood before the gates of the Jade Palace. "I can have rooms made up for you. It won't be a bother."

"I need to get home," he replied stiffly, eyes lingering off to one side. "My Mom needs checking up on. She's…" He shivered and clapped his jaw shut before gasping, "She's all by herself now!"

The slinky warrior studied him, noting the intense distress pouring off his every word and movement. That episode had struck Fung harder than she had imagined. It hurt to see him so obviously distressed. He wouldn't even look at her straight on. This saddened her, and she glanced away. "I see. I won't press you any further. It would have been nice to have you here, though. For some reason there's a lot fewer people around these days." She hesitated before asking. "Will I… still see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Don't worry. I'll be there."

Here he finally looked at her, and she did the same. They gazed into one another's eyes.

"Thank you, Viper. I lo…" His voice cut off, jaw trembling. Then, in a rush, "I look forward to seeing you again!" With that Fung turned and quickly began his descent down the long steps.

"Goodbye, Fung," she whispered as tears began to fall. The sun was going down, and the air already seemed chilly around her. Viper felt a familiar heartache. She wished she could help somehow. But what was there to do? Aggrieved, the lovely maiden made her way back into the palace.

Fung did not allow himself to look back as he hustled down the stairs. He didn't dare. His heart was urging him to return and throw himself before her, confess everything and hope against hope that she might forgive him. But even if she did, wonderful though that might be, it still wouldn't resolve the root cause of his distress.

"Go on, Fung!" he could almost hear their voices. "Go back to her. Live your own life! You've got it good now. Don't throw it all away just for us. We messed up on our own. It's not your fault. So just go. Be with her. We'll be happier if we know that's true."

"Darn it!" he sobbed, staring at nothing while tears leaked from his eyes. "You guys…! You're so… dumb!"

"Fung."

He jerked to a halt. Surprised to find himself on level ground, Fung realized he had gotten down the steps without even realizing it. The lights of town loomed up ahead. Between it and him there stood Po.

Upon seeing the expression the panda wore, his eyes narrowed viciously. "Get out of my way."

In response Po raised his hands to show he meant no harm. "Look, I know what you're thinking. Just leave it to us! We'll make sure nothing truly bad happens to them."

"What do you care?" he shot back.

"I… can't tell you why. But just trust me, okay? Can you do that, Fung?"

He looked the hairy mammal up and down, vague hope dawning. "You're saying… you'll bust them out? Let them escape?"

Po drew a quick breath, then slowly exhaled. "No. I'm sorry. We're keepers of the peace. The Furious Five uphold the law. We don't break it!"

"Yeah? Well last time I checked, the Dragon Warrior isn't a member of the Furious Five! You're supposed to do what's right! And this…!" He leveled a trembling finger at the town. "This isn't right! I don't care what rules they broke. Those guys aren't bad! They don't deserve to be executed just because a few roosters got shown up!"

"Fung, you don't know what you're doing! Just… let it go! You can't be responsible for them anymore!"

"Is that what you would do in my place, huh?" he spat. "If it was the Furious Five in that cage, would you just turn your back on them?!"

"It won't make any difference!" Po shouted in exasperation. "Can't you see that?"

"I know I don't have to be the Dragon Warrior to make a difference!" And with that Fung bellowed a war cry as he charged.

"Fung…" the living legend declared sadly. Then his face grew grim, he slid into his Panda Style form and…

WHAM!

One leather-shod foot connected with Fung's cheek. He pitched to the ground so hard for a moment Po was afraid he might be seriously hurt. But a second later the croc bandit was up and leaping forward again to swing his heavy tail with enough force to crack a rock. In response Po leapt straight up, flinging his whole body out horizontally and letting the attack pass below him even as he spun round and round like a drill. Both whirling fists lashed out to punch Fung hard in the chest. He collapsed to skid several yards back before coming to a halt, coughing and wheezing painfully. Po relaxed upon seeing him brought low.

Then, to his shock and horror, the bandit rose once more.

"Fung, don't make me hurt you, please!"

"Just shut up!" the crocodile snarled. He followed this by dropping down on all fours and speeding along faster than one might think a person of that size could move. Even if they did mainly excel in watery environments, crocodiles could be unnervingly quick on dry land. Fung counted upon this to take his enemy by surprise and allow him to zip past. Po wasn't much good when it came to sprinting; he had learned that much from their frequent battles. If he could get far enough away the panda would never catch up and it would be an easy enough matter to lose him in town.

Two hands seized hold of the tip of his tail. The next thing he knew Fung was swinging through the air, followed immediately by slamming hard to the ground. His eyes were shut tight with pain, but he managed to crack them open enough to see that it was not Po who had grabbed him.

"Tigress!" the panda protested. "Don't get involved. I can handle this!"

Fung's personal mistress of pain shot her ally a cold look, but consented to let go. She took a few steps back and crossed both arms over her strong chest. Emotionless eyes watched the pair of fighters.

That last attack hadn't been holding anything back, unlike with Po. Every inch of his body was screaming with intense pain. Woozily Fung flipped over onto hands and knees. The experience almost caused him to faint. He took a few deep breaths and shook his head to clear it. "Stay down!" he heard the Dragon Warrior plead.

Shah! As if. There wasn't enough air for words, so he just let that comeback remain unspoken. Instead Fung gave his response by clambering upright, ignoring the clear signals his body was sending that it might be a good idea to take the panda up on that earlier offer. His soul wouldn't allow it.

Fung stood once more, and turned around. He focused on the blurry and rather spinning versions of Po a few paces off.

"Okay, you asked for it!"

So saying the hefty warrior exercised impressive agility, doing several backflips and landing securely on his feet twenty feet away. He took a deep breath, and with a thunderous cry took off running straight at Fung. Halfway to his target the panda performed another flip. When his feet touched the ground he bunched his mighty leg muscles, his whole body seeming to clench into something more solid then steel, and with that Po launched himself into the sky. Spinning like a boulder rolling downhill and just as unstoppable, the colossal animal came streaking down towards his target, a black and white meteor from the heavens accompanied by the cry of, "SKA-DOOSH!"

There came a boom that caused several people at the top of the mountain to wonder if an earthquake had occurred. Unmoved, Tigress did not so much as blink when a wall of wind and dirt came rushing over her. She waited for the dust to settle.

When it did, the Dragon Warrior lay flat upon the turf. Below his hairy gut and sunk deep into the ground was Fung. Patting about with his hands, Po levered himself up, arms shaking visibly at holding all that weight. He then flopped onto his back and lay next to his crushed opponent. "Whew!" he huffed. "Didn't wanna… do that to ya, Fung. But you left me… no choice! I…" He attempted to sit up, barely lifted his head off the floor and winced in pain. "Ouch… that move… I might want to reconsider using it. Hurts me a lot too."

At last he managed to clamber upright. Swaying and stumbling, Po trotted over to where Tigress stood. "Okay," he mumbled, working his jaw from side to side in an attempt to realign it. "Now that that's settled, we should find a way to talk to Tuk Luk and…"

A shifting from behind alerted him. Unable to believe what his ears were telling him, Po lurched around. Sure enough, Fung had gotten to his feet. He stood bowed at the waist, arms dangling limp as noodles, but undeniably upright.

"Fung…" Po gaped uncomprehendingly. Then swallowing in a dry mouth, he walked steadily forth until he stood before the crocodile again. There he assumed his fighting stance once more. "This is pointless. Just stop fighting! You know you can't beat me!"

"Maybe," the croc bandit rasped, hunched over gasping harshly. Narrow yellow eyes rose to fix upon Po. "But you can't stop me!"

The panda flinched at these words. Uncertain of what to try next, he stood there with one fist raised in readiness. What can I do? Without doing something I will surely regret? But he won't go down! What is…?

A strong paw came down on his arm. Perplexed, Po looked over to find Tigress standing beside him.

"He's right," she spoke softly. "You can't win this fight."

While they stared at one another, Fung took this opportunity to lurch away. At first Po expected Tigress to do something quick and painful that would completely incapacitate the croc and possibly worse. Instead she just stood there holding on to him. Before long Fung had entered the outskirts of the village. Soon he was lost to view.

"We have to do something!" Po whispered in desperation. "If he gets caught… if Viper finds out…!"

"Viper is our problem. We will deal with the repercussions ourselves. But this…" She looked in the direction Fung had gone. "… is a task he has to face himself." Tigress turned back up the stairs. "Come. We must warn the others and see to Viper. Master Shifu will decide if we are to tell her the truth." So saying Tigress sprang up the mountainside without waiting for him to pursue.

Po wasn't sure how he felt about this. Fung and Viper being together was his responsibility. He had sworn to keep her safe! And by extension, him. Now there was no clearly right recourse available.

If that's so, then maybe other people should decide. Having reached this conclusion, he followed Tigress back to the Jade Palace.


Alone in her room, Viper sat contemplating. She looked at the red clay sculpture which now took up space on the rug. The person who made it was gentle and considerate. And I must do something for him.

She then rose up and sped to the door. Sliding it open, Viper was surprised to find Monkey standing outside.

"Hey, Viper! Where are you going?"

"Monkey, why…?" She caught herself before proceeding. There were lives at stake here. "Have you heard what's happening in town?"

His hairless face took on an uncharacteristically somber cast. "You mean about the croc bandits? Yeah, I heard."

"Monkey," she drew up before him. "Fung saw them! He heard what's going to happen! I can't explain, but this is hurting him somehow. I have to speak to Tuk Luk, try and convince him to have mercy! Even if it's a sentence of life in prison, that's still better than death." Viper gazed at her friend beseechingly. "Will you help?"

Monkey's mouth opened, and he grinned now in a way that indicated more discomfort than humor. But when he spoke his voice was gentle. "Okay. I'm with you. Let's go!"

"Thank you," she hissed, heart brimming with affection. The two fighters then stole down the halls and into the approaching twilight.

To be continued…