CHAPTER 4

Two days later. Emma stood on the landing in front of the door to Regina's home. She attempted to knock several times, but each time failed to have the courage to put her hand to the door. Taking a deep breath, she raised her hand for the fourth time. Just as she was about to bite the proverbial bullet the door opened to reveal Regina on the other side.

"Regina. Hi!" Emma blurted out in a brief moment of panic. Why was she panicking? I am an FBI agent. I am not supposed to panic, she thought, bringing her hand quickly back down to her side.

"Hi!" Regina smiled brightly, stepping out the door. Emma backed up uncertainly, giving her space. "I was…" Regina gestured "just about to step down there to get my mail. You're welcome to wait inside and I'll…be right back in. Don't go anywhere." She smiled again.

Oh, I'm not going anywhere. Emma tentatively stepped over the threshold and walked into the house. The first time she was there, she hadn't gone any further than the couch. But this time she found herself looking around, curiously. The homes in DuPont were open and spacious and usually very nice. Or so Emma had heard. Regina's was the first she'd been invited into. Just inside the front door, there was another door just before the kitchen that she had missed. A spare room maybe. The door was open and so she decided to look inside.

Normally, Emma realized, she might have been going through a person's belongings, given this much time alone. Instead she merely indulged herself in whatever was visible, silently perusing the room, hands clasped loosely behind her back while she waited for Regina to return. She didn't want to risk the chance that she could come back at any moment.

Still browsing, Emma saw that Regina had an easel in the middle of the room, a canvas propped on it with what appeared to be a work-in-progress. Aside from that, there were several other paintings of various sizes, shapes and colors positioned along the walls. She took a moment to admire the few of them that weren't turned with their backs to the room. It was as if each one of the paintings were calling out to her, attempting to draw Emma in. She found herself giving each one consideration, coming to the conclusion that not one of the works of art was similar in any way. There were portraits and landscapes and still life. Some appeared to be abstract and impressionist. But the ones that really blew her away...were the ones that appeared to be photo realistic.

Emma took what little knowledge she had of the art world and put it to use. An artist normally just had a style that was uniquely their own. You could choose one, compare each piece of their work and find some sort of technique that connected them all and linked that piece to its creator. But not this work. Each piece was definable and different and left Emma wondering what this said about the woman who had painted them.

"Now that you know my secret, care to share one of yours?" Emma jumped at the sound of Regina's voice. Why hadn't she heard her come back? Had she really been so immersed in the art that she hadn't heard the other woman approaching? She was slipping. This was bad. "So. What do you think?"

"These are beautiful." Emma answered, giving each piece one last look before turning her back to the art in favor of following Regina into her kitchen.

"Guilty pleasure." She shrugged. "Something you don't have to be good at, to actually be good at…you know?"

There was a moment of silence. Emma understood.

"So…" Emma started though she was not quite sure what to say. "What do you, uh…do? Work- I mean."

"Hmmm…." Regina vocalized the thought she was giving to her answer and lifted herself up to sit on the kitchen counter. She laughed nervously. "I always hate that question. When I answer, people assume that I must be spoiled and rich. I mean, I sell my paintings sometimes. But mostly to people who know my uncle. They always pay me way more than they are really worth. I think they just do it as a favor to him. I've uh, never had a job."

"I thought it was just a guilty pleasure?" Emma commented, leaning back against the counter opposite Regina.

"A guilty pleasure that I get paid for on occasion?" She smiled innocently and shrugged her shoulders.

"Don't sell yourself short just because you're unsure of your talent. Whatever they pay you, I'm sure they are the ones benefiting."

"Not to sound spoiled, but my uncle insists on taking care of me. Plus I have the insurance money from- He- he raised me after my parents died."

"Oh," Emma flinched genuinely, even though she'd already known about Regina's family. She knew almost everything about this woman, but found herself wanting to know more. She wanted to know everything. Not just what she'd read in some report. She wanted to know the more intimate side. The personal things. What makes this woman tick? What makes her smile? Laugh. Cry… "I'm really sorry to hear that…"

"It happened when I was thirteen. I didn't really get a chance to know them."

"Still. Thirteen is more than old enough for you to have bonded deeply with them. My relationship with my parents has never been outstanding, but I- I can't imagine not having them at all."

A few moments of silence passed, neither woman knowing what to say.

"What happened?" Emma asked cautiously. She already knew the official answer to her question, but she wanted to hear Regina's story. "If you don't mind my asking?"

"I don't mind at all." Regina smiled genuinely. "We were on our way home from a restaurant. I remember it was the middle of the week. A Wednesday night. Anyway, it was raining and we were going through a sharp curve and the next thing I remember is waking up in a hospital."

I wonder what other lies they've told her? Emma thought to herself and watched as Regina sat silently in reflection.

"I kept asking for my mom and the nurses just kept telling me that the doctors were taking care of them. And that everything would be okay." Another pause. "It wasn't until my father's oldest brother showed up that I knew something was really wrong. He was the one who told me that there had been an accident and that mother and father had been hurt badly. That they hadn't survived."

"I'm sorry…" Emma spoke softly, her voice laced with sympathy.

"He said the police on the scene told him that my father must have lost control going through the curve and because the road was wet, the car just flipped. I don't even remember crying. I was old enough to understand and I did understand. I just couldn't cry." Regina shrugged, running a hand through her hair. "Uncle Luis, he just sat there with me, looking at me like he was waiting for me to fall apart. Maybe it was shock, I don't know. I saw counselor after counselor. They put me on medication. But I was fine. When I was alone and I would think about my parents, I knew that they were okay. So I figured what was the point in being sad? They were cremated and I was given their ashes. So I felt like they were never gone. But everyone thought there was something wrong with me because I didn't react or grieve the way they thought I should."

"Everyone handles things differently." Emma reassured her.

"I guess as I got older, they just let it go. But Uncle Luis treats me like I'm still that little girl." Regina laughed to herself and shook her head. "So here I am, living my life and being happy."

"Do you have a big family?"

"Well, I was an only child." Regina started. "But my father was the youngest out of five brothers, so I have plenty of aunts and uncles and cousins. That side of my family is Spanish, in a ridiculous way. My father married my mother who was an only child herself and American, of course."

"I guess that's where you get your hair from?" Emma smiled.

"Oh yeah. Every picture I have of my parents, my mother's hair is a very light brown." A light was reaching Regina's eyes as she continued to talk about her mother. "She had great hair!" She laughed, running a hand through her own hair. "But I suppose I'm proof that certain genes always dominate."

"Somehow I don't think you were ever destined to be any different than you are." The compliment slipped past Emma's lips before she realized what she was saying. The sincerity of her statement surprised them both, she could tell by the shy smile that appeared on the other woman's lips. "I mean…I think everyone turns out exactly the way they're meant to. Everything happens for a reason. Fate, destiny and all that good stuff."

"That must be why you're standing in my kitchen this very moment then?" Regina went with it.

"Speaking of which, you should be more careful you know?" Regina looked at her uncertain as to where Emma was going with this. "You let me into your apartment and left me alone."

Here we go again, Regina thought to herself. "Soooo…we're back on this again. Did you steal anything?" Regina asked bluntly. "I mean, it wouldn't actually be stealing, until you've left with it, but-"

"Well, no." Emma, thrown, responded with a slight lift of her brow. She looked down at the floor and smiled to herself, knowing that she was being a little ridiculous

"Then what should I be more careful about?" She paused. Regina knew that they were slowly beginning to dance around each other. Testing the waters. So she added "It's not like I let every random person into my home. I have standards, you know."

I meet her standards? Emma questioned herself. She regarded Regina carefully before saying anything more. It seemed to her that for the niece of such a high profile member of the Mexican Mafia or La Eme as it was also known, this woman was far too trusting. Mostly, Emma didn't trust anyone any further than she could throw them. Mafia or not. And Regina's current display of 'ignorance is bliss', was leading Emma to believe that she might need to start reconsidering everything she thought she knew about her.

Say something. "It just seems to me that in such a big city, a person- a woman would be a little more cautious. Even with other women."

"Are you trying to warn me away from you? Or is paranoia just your 'thing'?" Regina waved her hands around in the air, punctuating her question. After a second she turned, pulling a cookie out of a jar and started using her hands to speak once again. "This is like the tenth time we've talked about this…" An exaggeration.

Emma allowed a slight smile to creep onto her lips as she watched Regina chewing thoughtfully on the small snack. What was that saying she'd heard so long ago? Something about how you could tell by watching a person eat, how good they were in bed? Emma shook the thought from her mind. That was the last thing she needed to be concentrating on.

"I wouldn't say I'm paranoid. I've just seen and heard about too many bad things that have happened to people in this city." She told her. "You have to be careful."

"I'll keep that in mind." Regina smiled. "But I don't think I'll start with you."

"Why's that?"

"Because then I'd have to ask you to leave."

She recognized that Regina was trying to be playful and decided to go along with it. She wasn't the type who usually went for who or what she wanted. Emma was the kind of person who sat back and let people come to her. And when they would, she never kept them around for very long. But with Regina, Emma suddenly found herself throwing caution to the wind. Wasn't this the woman who had scared her away two nights ago? Who had sent her running for the hills, as far away as possible? But something was calling her back. Every part of her body suddenly seemed to have a mind of its own. Pushing away from the counter, she moved to stand in front of Regina, carefully placing her hands on both of her legs. Emma searched Regina's deep brown eyes, silently asking permission to move in closer.

"We couldn't have that." Slowly she slid her hands up the outside of Regina's legs, stopping at her waist. "Maybe I was a little…hasty, the other night when I stopped you from…kissing me."

Emma's heart was pounding in her chest and Regina found herself leaning forward, her face inches from Emma's. The remainder of the small snack was long forgotten as it slipped unnoticed from Regina's fingers and fell from the counter to the floor. No one had ever elicited this reaction Emma's senses seemed to be having. Not even- No. She didn't want to think about that. She wouldn't think about that.

Especially now.

Especially here.

Not with this woman.

Their lips found each other and Regina allowed Emma to take the lead, parting her lips when Emma's tongue sought entrance. Amazing, the young Agent thought to herself, feeling the sharp burning sensation that ran through her body, directly to her core. Emma laced her fingers through the belt loops on Regina's jeans, using them as leverage to pull her to the edge of the counter.

Instinctively, Regina's legs wrapped themselves around the other woman's waist. Her fingers curling into Emma's hair as if she had no control over her own body. They continued to kiss feverishly as if the other could disappear at any moment. Emma's hands fell away from the loops, searching for the hem of Regina's shirt.

A moment later, hands touching bare skin, caressing the small of her back set Regina's body on fire. Every inch of her skin felt as if it was burning and she wanted more. She was beginning to feel lightheaded and the next thing she knew, her whole body was completely weightless and she realized that Emma had lifted her from the counter. Regina pulled back for a moment and found herself looking into Emma's green eyes. She could tell that this woman was an old soul and somehow knew they had been here before. That they belonged here now. To each other.

"Upstairs." Regina whispered, telling Emma where to take her. Everything about Emma felt incredibly familiar to Regina. Before she knew what she was doing, Regina's hands were on the back of Emma's neck, pulling her in for another kiss.

Emma was walking blindly. Moving on instinct, remembering the way everything was laid out; Emma found herself hoping that she could make it up the stairs to Regina's bed before she lost her grip and her nerve. She'd done a lot of things in her life, but carrying a woman up a set of stairs without looking where she was going was completely new to her. She knew what she was doing was insane. This was a case and she shouldn't be here with this woman. Not here. Not now. The timing was terrible, but Emma couldn't stop herself. She wanted more.

She wanted to touch every inch of this woman's body. Wanted to get lost. To crawl inside her skin and never return. She felt her legs come into contact with the bed and eased forward laying Regina down. Emma didn't let go, but instead supported her own weight as she balanced herself above the other woman. Her heart was racing as she pressed their bodies closer. A sense of urgency lingered inside, but Emma refused to rush. Tearing her mouth away, she planted a trail of kisses from Regina's ear, down the line of her neck and to her chest, nibbling carefully on the bit of exposed flesh just above her breasts.

With her head thrown back, her back slightly arched, Regina was breathing heavily and saw no sign of change in her near future. Somehow, Emma remained oddly composed. At least it appeared that way to Regina. Emma moved back up to Regina's lips once more, kissing her deeply. Slowly and with purpose. And it was almost enough to send Regina over the edge but she remained there, lingering on the verge of ecstasy, waiting- no, hoping for more.

"Oh Gods…" Regina mumbled between kisses. Emma smiled before taking possession of Regina's lips. Neither of them could hear anything except for the sound of deep steady breathing and soft sensual moaning that turned them on just a little bit more.

Emma reached for Regina's hands where they were around her neck and moved them to pin her wrists above her head. She drew her tongue from the exposed line of cleavage, to the tip of Regina's chin, causing her back to arch as she writhed beneath the soft weight of Emma's body. Supporting herself with her legs where she remained suspended over Regina's slightly smaller form, Emma lifted herself, letting go of Regina's arms in exchange for placing her hands on the hem of the other woman's shirt.

"Are you sure?" Emma asked softly.

"Yes." Regina nodded her head, her face flushed from all the emotions she was currently experiencing. Emma leaned in to kiss her once more, pulling her shirt up just a little as her hands pushed their way underneath. Slowly finding their way towards her breasts.

"I-" Regina tried to speak between kisses. "I've never…"

Emma paused, pulling back to look Regina in the eyes, giving her a moment to get out what she was trying to say. Neither of them realized that her impending admission was about to bring their tryst to a quick halt.

"You've never what?" She smiled sweetly at the woman beneath her. Regina looked away shyly, pulling back into herself as a child might do in the presence of a stranger, suddenly conscious of how things were about to go.

"Regina?" Emma urged, wondering where their conversation was headed. Gently, she pulled Regina's shirt back into place. "You've never what?"

"Never…" she took a deep breath. "Never been- with a-…"

"Oh." Emma whispered, the realization of the words sweeping over her like a tidal wave. It was all she could say. It wasn't as if Emma had never had sex with a straight woman. She'd been a first for many of them, in fact. But it still remained that something about Regina was different. Emma didn't want to just use her and move on. She wanted to take care of her. Provide for, shelter and protect her. And she had no clue where it was all coming from.

Regina pulled away and Emma moved off of her to sit next to Regina on the bed. Emma never looked away, watching as Regina sat up. She tugged her shirt back into place. She looks like a scared teenager on her first date. Timid. That's the word Emma was searching for. This extremely happy, cheerful, 'knows-what-she-wants' woman had done a one hundred and eighty degree turn around in a matter of seconds. Emma reached out to touch Regina's arm.

"Regina?" Emma encouraged Regina to look up at her. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say.

No response. Regina had met Emma's green eyes with her chocolate brown, but didn't speak. She sat there waiting. Her emotions were fighting back and forth between fear, humiliation and the unfamiliar primal need her body was telling her to act on.

"Okay, um... I guess I- hell, I don't know what to say. I'm not gonna lie." Emma shrugged, running a hand through her long hair. "There are a million things running through my brain right now. And I don't know what to say."

Regina dropped her head into her hands. No news was bad news. Isn't that what they say?

"Okay," Emma began in a rational tone. She reached for Regina's leg and placed her hand there, hoping to reassure her that everything was okay. "Right now? There is one question that keeps popping up more than the others and that would be, 'Are you attracted to women?'."

The answer was faint, but reached Emma's sensitive ears. "I'm attracted to you…"

"Okay, so, that's a start." Emma paused, thinking carefully how to word the next few questions. "So when you say 'never', I'm assuming that you mean you've never had sex with a woman?" Regina nodded, listening carefully. "What about kissing? Have you kissed other women?"

"Yes," Regina's tone seemed slightly more confident. "I've just never, you know…gone through with it."

"'Gone through with it.' Okay, well, then this definitely isn't going to happen right now." Emma saw Regina take in a deep breath and release it slowly. She didn't want to upset the woman, but Emma just didn't think she was ready to 'break her in' on the first day they spent together. Especially not when she thought more of her than that. Change the subject and make it quick. "I think we should go somewhere."

"Okay. What do you have in mind?"

How did I let this get so out of hand? "We could go get food, for starters? I'm pretty hungry." Emma was grasping at straws. Anything that would get them out of the bedroom would be good at this point. "There's a cafe over on Connecticut Avenue that I go to a lot. Great food. Outdoor seating…" Plenty of distraction.

"That sounds good." Regina answered. "I could definitely eat."

Emma smiled and stood from the bed. Facing the other woman she extended a hand which Regina accepted and allowed Emma to pull her up. Only inches apart, Emma reached out and brushed a few stray hairs away from the other woman's eyes. What is it about your eyes? She allowed her hand to linger on Regina's cheek and smiled reassuringly. Leaning in, Emma placed a light kiss on Regina's lips.

"We'll go get some food and we can talk." Emma smiled, sighing mentally and silently wishing for a cold shower instead of food.