Chapter 4: NarutoxHimself


Beautiful, shining, warm, mesmerizing, bright, rays of sun shone through a sleeping blond's window and laid on his beautiful, shining, warm, mesmerizing, bright face.

His shining, azure eyes awoke, and studied his surroundings for any danger. He didn't find any. Not that anyone would dare hurt this beautiful hunk.

He quickly pulled himself out of bed, ready to perform his early morning ritual. Naruto stood in front of his bedroom mirror and involuntarily held his breath as he took in the sight.

A tall six-foot tanned blond grinned back, his mischievous whiskers giving him a resemblance to a fox, and his canines were slightly elongated, almost like a fang but the less sharp version of it like a canine. His eight-pack could be seen through the tight orange muscle shirt, that he wore to bed, and his arms were ripped and bulging at a size that showed off his muscular, fit body, but not too much that it was ugly.

He leaned his head forward with his palms on the glass, and proceeded to lick the mirror, slobbering all over his reflection.

He raised his head again and smirked at himself.

"Who's this bad bitch?" he licked the mirror again. "Oh, it's me."

He continued on for 30 minutes, and returned to his bed, choosing to lie on his side on top of his orange covers.

"If I could date me, I would. I mean look at this ass," He muttered as he leered at his own set of firm buttocks. "But that'll never happen."

He suddenly shot out of bed, a wide grin taped on his attractive face.

"Unless…"

He closed his perfect orbs, and linked his fingers together in an 'O' formation.

He found himself in his mind landscape, but instead of a sewage, the entire area was filled with various mirrors of all shapes and sizes, and an illuminating light coming from the top. He took the moment to admire his gluteus maximus from the many angles, before continuing to his destination.

In the center of the mirror-land was the large cage that contained the Kyubi.

"Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy," he smiled at the huge beast in front of him. "Listen, I have this favor to ask."

Kyubi lifted an eyebrow and bared his fangs, but said nothing.

"Kyuti-"

"It's Kyubi." The fox growled.

"Yeah, yeah, Boobie whatever." Naruto waved his hand dismissively. "I'm going to need you to send me to another dimension where another me exists. Glad we worked this out."

"Why would I do that?" Kyubi said in his ominous evil voice.

It was Naruto's turn to raise his eyebrows at the insubordination.

"Bitch please, have you seen this ass? Can't get enough of it in one dimension. So, get on with the schedule already."

Kyubi studied the brat for a minute, and then nodded. Indeed, the brat's backside was of a fine specimen.

"But you know that you can just-"

Naruto raised a hand to silence the Kyubi.

"Didn't ask for life advice,"

"But-"

"Just do it."

The tall blond got thrown between dimensions and found himself eating dirt. He pulled his head out of the earth, gasping for ear, and felt up his wonderful face for any bruises or cuts. He let out a breath in relief, but on second thoughts, he froze up, and felt up his rear end and relaxed again. He wouldn't put it past the damn fox to injure his most precious assets.

The good thing was that everything was in check. Except for his energy being at an all-time low. Is this what the peasants felt like after a few rounds of throwing fancy jutsu around? Sucks to be them.

When Naruto finally studied his surroundings, he realized that he was smack in the middle of the Hidden Village of the Konoha Leaf thanks to word of God. That made his job significantly easier.

He scanned the crowd for blonde hair, because nobody else in this village had blonde hair. Except Tsunade. And Ino. And Ino's entire clan.

He notices the first head of blonde hair and pounces on them only to find himself tangled up in an Ino-clone. He proceeds to do this multiple times for some reason because all blondes look the same, until finally he found himself.

He smirked in success as he locked in on his target – who he would dub as Naruto 2. He studied him very carefully, approving of the not-quite-as-good-as-his-but-still-acceptable-ass.

He quickly gains on him, and places a warm, comforting, hand on the boy's shoulder. Naruto 2 turns around and a huge grin pastes itself onto his cute face.

"Are you Naruto 2?" Naruto 2 asks Naruto 1.

"No, I'm Naruto 1, you twit." Naruto 1 snarled. "Does this ass look like a 2 to you?"

Naruto 2's mouth gaped open. Naruto 1 pushed Naruto 2's jaw back where it was supposed to be.

"Don't do that." Said Naruto 1. "You'll ruin our beautiful-"

"Shining-" Naruto 2 continued.

"Warm-"

"Mesmerizing-"

"Bright-"

"FACE!" they both screamed together with joyous ecstasy, earning the glances of the marketplace who seemed to just notice them.

"Anyways, I came to this dimension to find you. Only I can fit my ridiculously high dating standards, so what better way to do it than to cross dimensions, looking for another me?"

Naruto 2 blushes a deep, scarlet, red, which was so red, that it was red.

"That's so romantic!" he gushes out, before pausing. "But wouldn't it had been easier if you just did the Shadow Clone Jutsu?"

Time seemed to freeze as Naruto 1 processed this information. Why was he so stupid?

He couldn't bear to look at Naruto 2 in the deep ocean orbs. He had failed him and himself. He couldn't adhere to his own standards. And that was unacceptable.

The void of the dimension seemed to hear his thoughts and started closing in on him, whispering in his ears of his utter failure. Or maybe that was just Boobie telling him 'I told you so'.

It only solidified his decision. He must commit Sudoku to remove this stain of a shame off his name.

He knelt on his knees in front of Naruto 2. He pulled out the long shaft of the Katana.

"I have brought shame upon our name, and will now perform Sudoku to regain our honor and thy ass."

Naruto 1 slide the sword into himself. Naruto 2 only gave him a strange look as a response.

"Not to ruin your honor retrieving, but isn't that something Samurai do?"

Naruto 1's face became pale white like the wrinkles of a shriveled ghost as he realized his error.

"I have brought double shame upon our name. DOUBLE SUDOKU!" he cried with a monotone voice as he slid the katana into himself again and again and again and again.


Honestly wondering why you guys are still reading this.