YES!!! Finally, I'm so sorry I made you all wait, but a very good friend of the family died from ovarian cancer just last week and we've been taking care of her kids while her husband took care of the funeral arrangments, it was a very nice service. It wasn't too flashy or fancy, which is just the way she would have wanted.
On a lighter note, my mother is almost fully recovered so updates should come much quicker than they have!
Warnings for this chapter: Once again, not much sadly... i keep on having to reign in my want to add more than the appropriate amount of NejiSasu because he did just come to this town, and if you remember Neji is straight(ish), don't worry though! This will change soon, so there will be much more lovin' in upcoming chapters!
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto... sadly, if I did... well you don't even want to know! I also don't own Dead Silence or Fall Out Boy's song, My Heart is the Worst Kind of Weapon...
NejiSasu owns!!! Please spread the love!!!!!!!!!!! Now onto the show...
Chapter 4 My Heart Is the Worst Kind of Weapon
I spent most of last night dragging this lake
for the corpses of all my past mistakes
sell me out - the joke's on you
we are salt - you are the wound
empty another bottle and let me tear you to pieces
this is me wishing youinto the worst situations
I'm the kind of kid that can't let anything go
but you wouldn't know a good thing if it came up and slit your throat
Your remorse hasn't fallen on deaf ears
rather ones that just don't care
cause I knowthat you're in between arms somewhere next to heart beats
where you shouldn't dare sleep
Now I'll teach you a lesson for keeping secrets from me
Sasuke could count on the fingers of one hand the amount of times he had talked to Gaara Sabaku, but he had seen and been around him quite a lot as a child. The first time had been when he was eight and had been forced to go to a group therapy exercise that his psychiatrist thought would help with his lack of social skills. Yeah, right. He went, regardless of his skepticism (like he had much of a choice), and the first person he saw was a kid, about an inch taller than him, with messy crimson hair and pale mint eyes, even then at nine, the youngest Sabaku had his tattoo for love and the heavy bags under his eyes (Sasuke had thought, at one of their meetings, that it was from insomnia, but he never asked Gaara to confirm his theory.).
Never the less, Gaara was the kid he sat with from then on. Every Friday, he would be escorted through the plain white building (many times Sasuke would wonder why they decided to make the building one solid color, the monotony of it probably only worsened the condition of the patients. At least it was enough to annoy Sasuke into near insanity.) and to the room that held group therapy. He would automatically walk straight to the seat beside the red-head, which would be the same seat every day. It was the seat right by the window, thank goodness (Sasuke doesn't know what he would have done if he had to stare blankly at the stupid plain white walls). They never talked to anyone, each other included. Gaara would sit with his legs in front of him, ankles and arms crossed, his eyes closed. Sasuke would be sitting Indian style and look out the window at the trees and sky, committing it to memory so he could draw it later, until the hour was over and he could go back to his room. Gaara never complained about his presence, actually, if anyone was going to take his seat when Sasuke was a little late, he would open his eyes and glare at the person until they eventually gave up and sat somewhere else.
They didn't know why they sat by each other. They didn't know one another, Gaara wasn't a patient at the hospital (his psychologist had merely suggested that this might be good for the youngest Sabaku, so there he was), and they didn't know each others story, why the other was there. They didn't even know each others names. Yet there they sat, every Friday, for over three months, until Sasuke stopped coming to the sessions, due to unknown circumstances. Gaara only continued to go for about two day before he told the doctor, death glare included, that he refused to continue going. Needless to say, Gaara didn't attend any more group therapy meetings.
The few other times Sasuke saw Gaara were on the streets, in dark alleyways. Apparently, like Sasuke, the red-head had gotten involved with some pretty shady characters. In those few times, they would stop and exchange a few words, but not much. Before the first such encounter, they had learned the others name and their story. There was this mutual respect and understanding between them and even though they didn't see or talk to each other often, they always listened out for any information on the other.
It wasn't a surprise that Sasuke had forgotten all about their past history. The new medication his doctors put him on after coming out of rehab caused a slight case of amnesia. Nothing too much, and he always remembered what he had forgotten eventually. They were very similar, he and Gaara, maybe that's why Sasuke had chosen to sit by him that first day of therapy, maybe that's why they wouldn't sit by anyone else, maybe that's why they felt that could act like themselves when it was just the two of them. Because they understood that the world wasn't perfect, that it wasn't in the slightest way fair, they felt a little more comfortable around each other.
Because the best way to re-enter society was to begin to feel more comfortable around people, one by one, especially people who were like yourself. At least, that's what the psychiatrists had said when they made him go to that first meeting. But there really isn't anyone like you when you are thrust into that type of situation. Before he met Gaara, he had known what it was to truly be alone. To feel that there was nothing and no one to share your pain with. He and Gaara had shared their pain with each other, not verbally, but by being there week after week. It was a silent message, fragile, and very hesitant. But it was reassurance, and Sasuke found himself wondering if he had ever thanked the red-head for giving him something so important. Then he wondered if he had to.
School was school for Sasuke. At least that's the answer Kakashi got every time he asked Sasuke how his day went. The week flew by, and Sasuke found himself cursing the promise he made to Lee about going out with them on Friday. Which just so happened to be today. Sasuke would never admit it, but he had never gone out with friends before and he was kind of nervous. Hell, he had never really HAD a friend before. Sure in New York he would go out, but usually by himself. Very rarely had he been accompanied, but if he was it was usually by Suigetsu, or Kimimaro, or Juugo and they were ne where near "friends". So he had no idea what he was supposed to wear, or do, or how he was supposed to act.
That day in seventh block, Lee had told him that they were going out to dinner, then to a movie, and then the boys would probably spend the night at Naruto's apartment. That last one had been iffy for Sasuke, but Kakashi had practically pushed him into going, saying that if he ever wanted to be a normal teenager, then he would have to do the normal things that normal teenagers do. He had stressed the normal when saying this, so Sasuke retorted with, maybe he would be a normal teenager if he had a normal guardian, who read normal books instead of porn. Kakashi had just laughed and said that he would be fine and if he really didn't want to stay then all he had to do was call. This implied that Sasuke was scared, and he could just not have that, so he had told Kakashi that it wouldn't be necessary and that he would be perfectly fine. In the house of stranger. In the house of a stranger that he had known for only a week. In the house of a stranger that he had known for only a week, in which he had no clue where said house was located. No, Sasuke was not freaking out at all. He pacified himself by saying over and over that Lee and Gaara would both be there.
That kind of helped.
So here he was, searching for something to wear in his disaster of a closet (he was still unpacking after all) blasting music from his iPod, humming to the chorus of one of his favorite songs to calm him down. It was about four o'clock, so Sasuke had about an hour before Lee and the others came to pick him up. Thankfully, he had already had a shower and made dinner for Kakashi (who was going to protest before Sasuke gave him a look that said 'shut up or I'm never going to cook again'), which was now in the oven.
Sasuke sighed slightly before finally deciding that he was being ridiculous. Therefore he grabbed the nearest pair of skinny jeans that happened to be a dark blue with rips at the knees and one on the upper thigh. He yanked those on and looked around his closet for the thousandth time in the last twenty minutes. He grabbed a small sleeveless black shirt that had a hoodie attached and had MCR splattered on the front in red. He threw on his black spiked belt and slipped on his black and red converse. He looked around for a moment, thumb under his chin, index finger tapping against his lips as he thought. The proverbial light bulb flashed on and he dug through one of his drawers before finding two black fingerless gloves, one that went up to his elbow and the other stopping at his wrist.
Satisfied with his outfit, Sasuke walked into the bathroom that was attached to his room. He looked at himself in the mirror for a little before deciding that a bit of light red shadow and eyeliner would complete the total emo/punk look he was going for. He was going out with a bunch of preps; hopefully his outfit would discourage those… things that were apparently called girls, from hanging off of him all night.
Sasuke brushed through his hair one more time, throwing it up in a high ponytail that left his bang hanging free, and grabbed his iPod and the player. He walked downstairs and set it up in the kitchen so he could finish Kakashi's dinner. He looked at the clock and noted that he had thirty minutes to go through and clean while finishing dinner.
Sasuke didn't even look up as the doorbell rang thirty-six minutes later, "Dad! Go get the door please!"
Kakashi looked up and sighed, marking his book by folding the corner of the page; he practically had to drag himself out of his comfy chair and to the front door. He looked through the glass at the side of the door and saw four teenage boys, waiting patiently.
"Kakashi! Opening a door is not brain surgery, any minute now!" The scream came from the kitchen and Kakashi chuckled as he opened the door.
"Hello Lee-kun, Neji-kun, Naruto-kun, Gaara-kun. Please come into our wonderful abode!" Kakashi said dramatically as the boys filed in.
"Hello Kakashi-san! You have a very beautiful house! Where is Sasuke-kun?" Lee asked as he looked around enthusiastically, listening to the music that was playing.
Kakashi grinned, "Thank you Lee-kun, but you really should tell that to 'Suke, he did all the decorating, I just did the manual labor. He's in the kitchen though; he's graciously making my dinner for me, even though he's not going to be here. He loves me so very much!" Kakashi explained as they walked through the living room to the kitchen, where Sasuke was checking to see if the lasagna that he was making was done or not.
"Sasuke-kun! I have told Kakashi-san already, but your house is magnificent! Do you need any help?" Lee asked as Sasuke confirmed that the lasagna was indeed done.
"Thank you Lee, but I've got it for now. Hello Neji, Gaara, Naruto." Sasuke greeted the group of boys as he lifted the oven door slightly and hit it with his hip to close it before setting the lasagna down on the stovetop.
Sasuke looked over at Kakashi, who was leaning on the counter nearest him, "And you, the only reason I cook at all is because if I don't then I would die of starvation, and the only reason I'm cooking now, is because if you did it, I'd come home tomorrow and the house would be burned to the ground. Also, let that cool for a few minutes or you're going to burn yourself, there's water and I made some tea yesterday, it's in the fridge. Don't make a mess or you're cleaning it up, oh and don't forget to lock the door and set the alarm before you go to bed. Okay?"
Kakashi sighed and looked at the boys who were looking at Sasuke as if he had grown a second head, "Sometimes I don't know who's taking care of whom here. Everything will be fine Sasuke, now go, skip and sing and be merry, and all that jazz."
Sasuke looked at Kakashi suspiciously as he was putting his iPod into his pocket and the player into his small duffel bag, "If I didn't know better, I'd say you were trying to get rid of me, anything you want to tell me dad?"
"That, 'Suke dear, is called paranoia. After all, how could I ever want to get rid of you? I would most certainly die." Kakashi said while nodding, as if agreeing to his own statement.
"Yeah, come on Sasuke-chan! Let's leave the old man alone and go have fun!" Naruto said, putting an arm around Sasuke's shoulders, receiving a glare for his words and actions.
"Get off me, dobe." Sasuke said as he slipped out of Naruto's grasp and made his way to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow otou-san." Sasuke called as Lee and Naruto pushed him out of the door while Neji and Gaara followed.
Kakashi smiled, "Love you 'Suke, have fun."
Naruto's car was nice. Not nice as in sporty and expensive nice, but nice as in comfortable and able to fit five people rather nicely nice. Naruto and Lee sat in the front, which left Sasuke in the back between Gaara and Neji. Yes, cue blush, now.
Gaara had decided to make himself busy by looking through Sasuke's iPod, one of the earpieces in his right ear, the other in Sasuke's left ear, while Neji, Lee, and Naruto were discussing the upcoming football season. Gaara clicked on 'Teenagers' by My Chemical Romance and Sasuke began to tap his fingers to the familiar beat. Then a question formed in Sasuke's mind.
"Where are we eating?" He asked, fingers still tapping to the music.
"Oh! Did I forget to tell you Sasuke-kun? We're going to a little diner right by the movie theatre; Chouji's parents own it and they have the best food out of any restaurant in the city. I'm so sorry! I should have told you so that you knew and had a say in what we do! I'm so sorry!" Lee said as he turned around in his seat so fast that Sasuke thought he was experiencing whiplash.
"Oh, that's okay Lee, I was just curious, it's not that important." Sasuke said slowly, not really knowing what to say.
Lee then smiled and turned back around his seat just as quickly as the last time. Sasuke could swear that he was getting dizzy by Lee's movements, and he thought that the other boy had to at least a little bit dizzy.
Neji smiled slightly and turned to Sasuke, "He's always doing that, it's okay, it's normal."
Sasuke blinked and cocked his head to the side, "Doesn't he ever get dizzy? I wasn't even moving and I got dizzy."
Neji laughed, "I guess not, and if he does, no one can tell."
About a ten minute car drive landed Sasuke in a modest little diner with about seven people, these people included: Naruto, Lee, Gaara, Neji, Ten-Ten, Sakura, and Ino. Now, Sasuke was not sexist, not in the least. However, Sasuke has come to the conclusion that these very nice guys, who Sasuke surprisingly got along with very well, made really bad choices when it came to female friends. The only girls that Sasuke had met and liked was Gaara's sister, Temari, and Neji's cousin, Hinata.
Ten-Ten, Sakura, and Ino were what Sasuke referred to as the 'things.' They were the stereotypical prep girls, snobby, rude, pig-headed, and impossible to divert. As soon as the guys entered Ten-Ten practically attached herself to Neji (which made Sasuke narrow his eyes in a glare), and Sakura and Ino almost tackled Sasuke, had he not side stepped out of dangerous, he would have been directly in their line of fire. So Sasuke pretty much stayed at Gaara's side, as his glare of doom seemed to keep them away.
Unlike Sakura and Ino, who were practically obsessed with him, Ten-Ten did not like Sasuke. In fact, she probably hated him as much as he hated her. So it wasn't until they were half way through their meal when she finally turned her attention to him.
"So, Sasuke-kun, where did you move here from?" She asked in that completely fake, overly sweet voice that almost made Sasuke wince as his ears were assaulted by the sound.
"New York." He said simply, turning back to Gaara and going to eat his chicken tenders. (Yes Sasuke preferred getting chicken tenders everywhere he went, so what?)
Apparently, that wasn't all Ten-Ten had to say, "Really? I used to live in New Jersey, but I had a cousin who lived in New York. What's your whole name, maybe I've heard of you."
"Uchiha Sasuke." He said, still turned towards Gaara.
Ten-Ten's eyes went wide and she gasped and pointed at him, "Oh my god! You're an Uchiha, I heard about you! You're the one whose broth-"
Sasuke turned back to her with a cold glare, "Shut up. Now."
Sasuke returned to his food silently, his head bowed low so his bangs covered his eyes. Gaara shot her a murderous glare that sent Ten-Ten jumping to Neji, who in turn gave her a disapproving look and tried, in vain, to shake her off his slowly dying arm.
Apparently Sasuke's luck was steadily increasing, as the 'things' couldn't stay to go to the movies, opting instead to go to the mall, something about having nail appointments. Whatever, as long as the dubbed 'bitch from the fiery chasm known as hell,' a.k.a Ten-Ten went with them he couldn't care less. He briefly wondered if Neji's arm was in such a state that it would need to be amputated from the grip she had on him, but he ignored said thoughts in favor of listening to Lee talking about what they should see.
"What kinds of movies do you like Sasuke-chan?" Neji asked as they walked the few blocks to the movie theatres.
Sasuke shrugged, "I don't really know, I've never really watched T.V or gone to the movies. Whatever you guys like is fine."
Neji looked over at him, surprised, as they walked up to the line, "You've never been to the movies? What did you do for fun back in New York?"
Sasuke handed his money over to Gaara, since he had offered to get their tickets so they wouldn't all have to stand in line, "I'm more of a stay inside, draw and write, sort of person, now." Sasuke explained that quiet voice of his.
Neji was going to comment on the 'now' part of the statement, but chose not to pry, "That's cool, what do you like to draw and write?"
The group walked inside and made their way to the concession stand, Naruto and Lee talking about the horror they were going to go see, Gaara walking in his spot by Sasuke silently listening to Neji and Sasuke's conversation, silently a part of the conversation.
"I draw anything really, whatever I feel like. I write music and I love to sing." Sasuke said as he looked at the big menu on the wall behind the counter.
Neji looked over at him, "Do you want anything Sasuke-chan?"
Sasuke looked up and blushed slightly, "I was just going to get an Icee."
Neji smiled, "I'll get it, I was gonna get one too."
This caused Sasuke to blush even more as he went to give Neji the money. Neji rolled his eyes, "Sasuke, its 2.49, don't worry about it, okay."
Gaara looked at Sasuke and saw, if it was possible, his blush get even darker. The red head smiled a small smile, "Me and Sasuke will go get seats while you guys get the food."
Sasuke looked over at Gaara and blinked, "Huh?"
Naruto just smiled, "Okay! See you inside!"
Gaara grabbed Sasuke's hand and drug him off in their theatre's direction. Once there Gaara drug Sasuke to the very top, which was where the gang sat every time they came to see a movie. They sat in the center, Gaara sitting to Sasuke's right. The red-head looked over at the raven and smirked. That smirk could mean many things, it could mean 'I know what you're hiding', or 'I can't believe you just let me drag you all the way here without even a glare', though it was probably the former, since Sasuke hasn't ever glared at Gaara before.
"What?!" Sasuke asked the very smug looking Sabaku.
"You like Neji." This was not a question, no, it was a statement. A very sure statement, it was clear that Sasuke wouldn't be able to convince Gaara otherwise, and he briefly pondered how the Sabaku got to know him so well.
"You're not very inconspicuous about it. You blush practically every time he talks to you." Gaara smiled slightly as Sasuke pouted, clearly not liking this situation at all.
Then Sasuke turned around fully in his chair to face his red headed friend, "What should I do Gaara? I've never had a… a…"
"A crush." Gaara supplied.
Sasuke nodded his head, "Right. I've never had a crush before, and the guy seems straight, so tell me what I should do."
"Hell if I know." Gaara said, resting his feet on the seat in front of him, his arms crossed behind his head. But as he looked over at the raven, the pout on his face, and his eyes pleading and needing help, he mentally cursed Sasuke and his evil pout that was slowly smothering his will. Gaara could hear Sasuke's mental maniacal laughter of triumph as he sighed.
"Naruto would be better at this kind of stuff, but I guess I can help you out." Gaara said rolling his eyes as Sasuke beamed at him.
"Thank you Gaara, have I ever told that you're my best friend?"
Gaara looked over at what he could, reluctantly, call his most precious person. Sasuke had been there for him, all those years ago, during some of the hardest times of his life. It didn't matter that they barely ever spoke, the connection that they had, and still have, was what Gaara had needed. He realized at that moment, sitting in the movie theatre, waiting for the two idiots and Neji with the raven, that the other boy was something indeed very important to him. He would do anything for Sasuke; all the other boy had to do was ask. (1)
Gaara ruffled the younger boy's hair, still in a ponytail, and laughed when Sasuke scowled at him for messing his hair up. Sasuke pulled his hair down and put it back up as the other boys made their way up to where he and Gaara were seated. Sasuke could only blink as Naruto and Lee's walked up the stairs slowly, arms were filled with food, Neji only carrying two large cups, stood behind them, tapping his foot impatiently.
They finally made it to the top, though Neji bypassed them on the stairs, muttering about 'idiots with endless pits for stomachs'. Neji sat in the seat to the left of Sasuke and handed him his Icee, "Sorry it took so long Sasuke-chan, we would have been here sooner, but Lee and Naruto decided that they were going to stuff their faces during the movie."
Gaara snorted, "Probably so they don't have to focus on the screen but on their food instead, pansies."
"Hey! We heard that Gaara! I'll have you know that I'm just very hungry right now!"Naruto cried indignantly.
Sasuke looked over to where Naruto and Lee were sitting, "That is a lot of food Lee; didn't you eat enough at dinner?"
Lee smiled, "Nope, I have to eat a lot to keep up with my work-outs, so I eat about four or five times a day."
"But Lee, the food here really isn't healthy, if you have to eat that much you should at least be sure that you follow a healthy diet." Sasuke said, letting some of his mother-hen qualities show through.
"Its okay, Sasuke-kun, I usually eat healthier, but just for today, I thought I'd splurge some."
"The bad thing about it is that they'll eat even more when we get to Naruto's apartment." Neji rolled his eyes and chuckled as Sasuke made a disgusted face. Suddenly, the lights dimmed until they were completely out and the credits started.
Twenty minutes into the movie and Sasuke was holding onto both Gaara and Neji for dear life. When they said that they were going to be seeing Dead Silence (2), Sasuke didn't really care. Of course he didn't care because he didn't know what the movie was about. So, in turn, he didn't know that it would have that seriously creepy little doll in it. Sasuke hated many things, this was true, but there were only a few things that he feared, and those few things just happened to include dolls.
So he wasn't ashamed at all that he was gripping Neji and Gaara's hands so tight that they might fall off later. And he was too afraid to even comprehend that he was holding his crushes hand. All he could focus on was that damned creepy doll on the screen. Tonight was not going to be fun.
"Man, that was awesome! I wonder if that legend is true, like it really exists. That would be so cool to be a part of a ghost story like that! Don't you think Sasuke-chan?" Naruto asked, looking over at the paler than normal boy who was still clinging to Neji and Gaara just as hard as they had in the movie theatre.
The shaking boy shook his head in the negative sign slowly, "I hate dolls. I hate clowns and I hate dolls. And that blasphemous thing you call a film put both of them together… that was horrible."
Gaara brushed his bangs back soothingly, "It's okay, 'Suke, it was just a movie. It wasn't real; nothing is going to come after you."
Neji looked over at the distraught Sasuke, and then at the hand that holding his in an iron vice, for some reason, it didn't bother him. Besides, the boy was shaken up pretty badly; Neji wouldn't have had the heart to try to pry him off anyways.
They got into the car, where Sasuke finally loosened his grip on the two boys, and started to calm down. It was relatively quiet during the drive, Naruto and Neji talked some, and Lee was Lee, but a bit more tamed than usual.
They finally parked in a nice sized apartment complex, the building was a warm brick color, Sasuke could see that from the light of the streetlamps. It was a very pleasant looking place, actually, and Sasuke thought that it might be more comfortable than his and Kakashi's oversized house. The boys grabbed their bags out of the car and made their way up to Naruto's floor, which happened to be the top. Once there, Naruto took out his key and sighed, "Home, sweet home."
Sasuke immediately took a liking to the cozy apartment, it wasn't too little and it wasn't too big. It was the seemingly the perfect size, and it had a very homey feel to it.
"You have a very nice home, Naruto." Sasuke complimented quietly. Smiling slightly when Naruto beamed back at him, Sasuke sat his stuff by Gaara's and retrieved his pajamas, a pair of boxers and a blue ribbed tank top.
"Where is the bathroom, Naruto?" Sasuke asked as the others flopped onto the couch, well Lee and Naruto sprawled out onto the couch as Neji sat on the loveseat, Gaara just sat in comfortable looking recliner by the loveseat.
"Huh? Oh, right down the hall to the right Sasuke-chan." Sasuke nodded and went off to change.
I decided to end it there, the rest of the night will be in the next chapter...
If you're wondering why Sasuke acts so differently around people in Konoha than in Japan, it's because it's a completely different environment, I mean he doesn't like the girls as youcan tell, but the guys he gets along with... probably because they're not as self-serving and manipulative there as the people he got mixed up with in New York.
(1) You may be wondering if Gaara has a 'thing' for Sasuke, but no. Not in this story, in this story, Gaara genuinly cares for Sasuke in a strictly non-lover way. But he is Gaara's most precious person.
(2) Okay, no kidding, this freaking movie scared the living shit out of me. I love scary movies, and out of all of them that I have seen (which is quite a few) this is the only one to officially freak me out. I hate dolls and clowns, and wtf! This movie decided to put them both in one!-shivers-
And by the way, I don't hate Ten-Ten at all, I dislike Sakura and Ino, but I actually kind of like Ten-Ten. She's one of my favorite girl characters, behind Temari of course. But it fits the story if she and Sasuke hate each other, so sorry Ten-Ten!
Now, things between Neji and Sasuke will take off soon, because Gaara's helping and we know that when he commits to a cause he sticks to it, especially concerning our Sasu-chan! I just didn't want it to seem like one of those stories where they meet and automatically Neji converts to gayness and they immediately fall in love. Sasuke's too screwed up and shy to actually just go for it, and Neji is supposedly 'straight' right now. So Neji will be questioning his sexuality and he will have to work that out before he and Sasu-chan get together. But don't worry, they'll get to each other some how, then Neji will have to fight to keep him!
Wow, I gave him a lot to do huh?
Please, please, please review! You have no clue how much it makes me smile to have people tell me that they enjoy my writing, and I need that support right now!
Thank you! And remember to add your support to NejiSasu fanfics if you like this story!
