Updated 4/9/2019: Edited for a smoother read.
Chapter 4
That evening, after his shift was done, he told the remaining Kingsguard that the queen was not allowed into the White Tower and the king had granted them the authority to keep her from going in. He returned to his room to remove his armor and then stopped at Jaime's door once more.
He knocked. When he heard nothing, but silence, he said, "Ser Jaime, I am entering."
He rather expected Jaime to remain abed, but instead he found him sitting in his desk chair with a book between his hands. Jaime glared at him but said nothing.
"Have you eaten yet today?"
Silence still. Jaime didn't shake his head either, but continued to glare at him.
"I shall summon soup for you. I expect it to be empty in the morning."
Silence.
"You should be aware that the queen has been banned from the White Tower. The Kingsguard now have the authority to eject her should they find her about."
That at least earned him a sharper look. "How did you manage that?"
"The Kingsguard are a proud organization meant to stand above the petty whims at court," Barristan replied in a hard voice. "No man or woman shall abuse them like they are little more than servants. We are better than that."
"You told the king?" Jaime snarled, wincing once more at the pain in his throat. "Shall I expect a rude awakening in the night to remove my head?"
Barristan felt a muscle in his jaw work. "I told the king that she grabbed you by the hair and slapped you."
That actually earned him a flicker of surprise. You lied? You lied to your king? The look said, but still Jaime seemed wary and angry.
"You still told him that she took advantage of me," he rasped.
"Whatever I think of you, Ser Jaime, I do know that you have never raised a hand against a woman and you never will. To raise one against your sister and queen would be treason and your head would certainly be removed from your shoulders. You resisted the only way you could. I understand that and that's how I laid it out before the king. I am your ally. Whether you believe it or not, I do want to help you, to right what went wrong. I will do what I can to show you that."
"Stop saying you care. You don't!" Jaime whispered as fiercely as he could manage and he massaged his throat. "You're just curious to hear what could possibly have inspired me to end my life. I refuse to say."
"That's certainly one part. But you are the second most senior member of the Kingsguard and that makes you my second-in-command. You are also the most reliable, both in a fight and doing your duty to the royal family."
Jaime did not even bother protesting, merely chuckled derisively and shook his head.
"I have sent a letter to your lord father about this incident." There was no mistaking the alarm on Jaime's face at that news. "I suspect he shall be here with all haste." Depending on how many men Lord Tywin insisted on taking with him, he could be here in as little as a month.
Barristan stood in the doorway one last moment, hoping perhaps that would be enough to get Jaime to open up, but there was a defiant jut to his jaw and he continued his silence. He closed the door and headed downstairs to order Jaime his dinner, wondering all the way how he had subverted so many of his values so quickly.
'I lied for him,' he thought with a troubled frown. It wouldn't sit right with him to see Jaime suffer as a result of his sister's abusive behavior, but shouldn't he suffer for the murder of Aerys? 'The Gods appear to have absolved him of that,' he thought. Or was it the other way around? Was not being allowed to kill himself a desire to punish him? But then why would the Gods care? How many years had come and gone, and how many good men had walked through these halls and not received the Gods' aid?
Prince Rhaegar had been the best of them all with a few too many hasty decisions, but he had deserved to live over a cad like Jaime Lannister. 'And yet the Gods did not step in to divert King Robert's hammer. It still struck true,' he thought, his heart giving a lurch as he thought on that fateful day. He'd already been wounded, barely alive, on the banks of the Trident, or Robert would never have gotten that close to his Prince.
After ordering food for Jaime, he intended to return back upstairs to his room, but found his feet carrying him out the door and it wasn't until he saw the ornate crystal windows that he realized he was going to the sept. 'It's been awhile since I paid my respects directly to the Seven,' he thought. His questions certainly were better suited for Gods.
He lit a candle and placed it in front of the Father, staring up into his rectangular and carved face, silent and forbidding as the stone he was hewn from.
"Father, please grant me the wisdom to see your bidding done. Of all people, why him? What is it that you hope to achieve? Was this revealed to me for a reason? Am I doing the right thing?"
Pious and devout as he was to honor, he knew it would be the height of folly to go into detail. Besides, if the gods were watching, they already knew them. He bowed his head again and said another silent prayer, peering once more into the face of the Father to find his answer.
A breeze didn't even ruffle the candle flames. He bowed his head once more and strode out of the Sept. His head was still down as he walked across the grounds, but a noise caused him to glance up. His hand went unconsciously to his waist, though he had left off any weapons. The queen was striding to him, dressed in a customary silk red dress with gold trimming and lace. She was alone and despite the darkness he thought he could see fire in her eyes. His hand relaxed and he nodded at her.
"Your Grace," he said quietly in the dark.
She was silent for a moment as she seemed to evaluate him. "Ser Barristan," she hissed, the honorific sounding like poison in her mouth. "Now, what would the good King Robert say if he knew his most honorable Lord Commander lied to him about the circumstances of what happened between my brother and I?"
"He'd be a lot less concerned about me and a lot more concerned about your conduct, Your Grace," Ser Barristan replied evenly, but his eyes strayed around the yard. Her own guard of Lannister soldiers had to be hiding nearby in the shadows, just close enough to assist her if she needed it. He cursed himself for not keeping his sword at hand and vowed from then on he wouldn't wander anywhere alone without it.
"So you did see," she murmured to herself.
He remained silent, watching her as she seemed to think on that.
"Why didn't you tell him? I know you have little love for your queen. You may try to hide it, but you hate me and you hate my brother."
"I do not hate you or your brother."
She chuckled and shook her head. "Ser Barristan the Bold is bold indeed. When did you become so good at telling lies? You're clearly not as honorable as you think."
I'm less honorable than even you realize, he thought. She was trying to rankle him, but for what purpose he could not see. He cared a great deal about honor and being honorable. Young boys across the realm, rich and poor alike, looked up at him as a hero of old and he strove to be the man they all thought him to be. That said, he was not unfamiliar with lying. He told white lies, of course, but he also had to engage in the real, dangerous lying. Closer to the end of King Aerys II, Prince Rhaegar had asked him to make his excuses at court and he had been forced to lie, to the king's face, about the Prince's whereabouts. He remembered the king accepting his explanations with no small amount of suspicion. It was after one of these lies that he discovered the prince had absconded with Lyanna Stark.
The king had believed his lies and threw Brandon Stark into the cells for his foolish demands. That of course, led to both the lord and heir burning in the court. Standing there by the king's side as he watched Rickard Stark cook in his armor, he had been forced to come to the terms that it was his lie that had led to the Starks' deaths.
He remembered looking across the throne over at Jaime Lannister, to find him pale and shaking in his armor. He caught the young man's eye and saw a desperate pleading there. This isn't right. What are we doing? We have to save them. He'd been forced to give the barest shake of his head and then he had turned back to the spectacle, hoping his face showed none of the anguish that he was feeling.
Barristan brought himself back to the present as Cersei continue to speak, "-have no right to separate me from my twin. I must be with him in this difficult time."
"In my experience, one doesn't make a habit of hurting their loved ones," he growled.
Even in the limited light, he could see her mouth form into a stubborn and angry line. "What would you know about the bonds between twins?"
"All that I need to know, your grace, is that you hurt a member of the Kingsguard. I will not tolerate that kind of abuse from anyone, for any reason," he said and turned to leave.
"Before you go, perhaps at least you'll explain your other lie?"
He stopped and turned again. "What other lie?"
She raised an object up in her hands and he could see the shadow of the noose. He froze.
"I did my own investigating and found this at the heart tree. You said you 'cut him down,' but the rope is burned. I may not be as knowledgeable about weapons of death as you, but I would think my brother would be dead in the time it took for a rope to burn through." She twisted the rope in her hands like she was breaking a neck. "You are clearly mistaken about the circumstances regarding my brother's hanging. I will give you this chance to come clean with the truth."
"I don't know how the rope got burned, Your Grace, but it could be that someone attempted to burn it afterwards."
She chuckled darkly. "Now why would they do that?"
"It is not my job or inclination to know what I didn't see."
"Liar," Cersei hissed. "You may be better at telling mistruths than I anticipated, but your voice wavered in your explanation. You know what happened."
He remained silent. There was nothing he could say. Even if he didn't suspect the queen's intentions, blurting out that the rope spontaneously burned through would cast doubt on his ability to lead the kingsguard. He was certain he was of sound mind. And more, Jaime seemed to understand what he was talking about when he mentioned it. He turned to walk away again.
"Be careful, Ser Barristan. It's dangerous to be alone in the Red Keep," she said back to him, but he continued. Even without a sword, he had techniques to take the weapons from anyone she sent after him. I doubt she would be so overt, he thought. It would be entirely too suspicious if something were to happen to him after Cersei got banned from the White Tower. Even so, it never hurt to take precautions.
