Chapter Three: Then Reality Sorta Hit... or Something...

Place: South Park Colorado Time: 1500 Monday afternoon Place (again): Cartman's house

"Come on, Cartman, just take your turn, it's not hard."

"Yeah, fatass, come on!"

"Hold on a second, you guys, this takes a lot of serious thinking... hmyah... Okaaaaay... got any... threes?"

"Go fish, fatass."

Just a normal Monday afternoon, playing go-fish, and not really up to anything else, since they didn't have any homework.

Mr--s. Mrs.Garrison was out for touch-up surgery.

But, back to those who matter.

"Ay! I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Stan."

"I don't have any three's, lardbutt."

"Goddammit! I HATE GO FISH!" Cartman said, drawing a card. Not liking the outcome, he swore again. "Goddamit!"

"Okay, my turn. Got any two's Cartman?"

"Ehm... no. Go fish, Jew! AHAHAHAAHAAAHAA!"

"Goddammit, Cartman, how do we know you're not cheating?"

"Do I ever cheat?"

"Yes!"

"... I hate you guys so much." He said, tossing him the two.

After a few minutes of increased boredom, Kenny stood up and stretched.

"(Well, I'm gonna go. This sucks, and I promised I'd meet my... uh... girlfriend.)" He said, putting his gloves back on.

"Geez, Kenny, you're still seeing that Kelly girl from that gayass choir?" Stan said, chuckling slightly. The rest of the boys joined in, too.

"(Uhm... yeah. Bye.)" He said quickly, rushing out the door. Stan stood up next. "I got to go too. My mom needs me for some stuff."

"Mine too. See ya, Cartman." Kyle added, walking with Stan out the door.

"Jesus Christ, all of my so-called friends just up and deserted me, Clyde Frog." Cartman said to his stuffed frog, sitting on the couch behind him.

"Yes, it would seem we are alone for the moment, we should have a tea party and talk about how cool you are."

Okay, that's not really what happened. Rewind.

"Jesus Christ, all of my so-called friends just up and deserted me, Clyde Frog." "Yes, we should get our mom to take us to the store, and buy us a skateboard." "That's a great idea, Artemis Clyde Frog! Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaammm!" He whined, going to find his mother.

When Stan got home, his mother had left a note for him. He read it... and re-read it... and dropped it on the floor, mouth agape.

Kyle walked into his house to find his parents arguing. They didn't see him as his dad walked out, and his mom stomped to her room.

Kenny walked down the street. Kelly had dumped him for another guy months ago. Whatever. He had someone now. But he couldn't tell the guys the truth. That would just be humiliating.

Or suicide. Or a combination of the two that would be some sort of... Humicide. That sounds like french potpourri. But anywhat...

Two weeks ago... ... ...

"Okay, children, and that's why we have the stupid government system we do now. Any questions?" The students of Mr.--- Mrs. Garrison's classroom simply stared at him.

"Okay then, well, since there are no questions, then you shouldn't have a problem with handing in a 2 page essay on the stupid government's president and how gay he and his wife are."

The bell rang, and the students ran out. Cartman, Kyle, and Stan were all going to Cartman's house to finish a rousing game of Monopoly.

Kenny was excluded, of course, for being poor.

'Stupid asshole Cartman...' He thought, amusing himself with a paper airplane.

But his luck isn't all that great, and he slipped and fell in the mud.

"(OOF! Aw... mom's gonna kill me.)" He mumbled, frustrated. His mom didn't like his stuff dirty, orange was a hard color to clean, she said.

"Are you okay?" He knew that voice. He looked up, and sure enough, it was who he thought. Wendy Testaburger, Stan's ex-girlfriend.

"(Well, yeah, I'll be okay.)" He said, trying to wipe the stuff off, but not making much progress.

"You can come to my house, and wash it there if you'd like." She said kindly. Kenny nodded and followed her inside.

"(Actually, if you have some vinigar, baking soda, lemon juice and a blow dryer, I could clean it quicker.)" He said, struggling to get his coat off.

Wendy nodded and got the items out, setting them on the kitchen table. She looked around for the orange coat with eyes that was usually there, but...

She gasped. He looked different without his hood up. She knew he had a face and stuff, but she'd never seen it before... or his hair... he looked like a rock star, his blonde hair messy, but in a cool way.

"Thanks. Okay, we take this, and mix it with this..." He said, geting started right away. Wendy simply stared. "How do you know all this stuff?"

Kenny didn't look up, but simply went to work. "I actually am pretty smart, I just usually don't care." He said shortly. Wendy agreed, and instantly went off on a tangent about how tiny the town was.

When she had been talking for five minutes and Kenny still hadn't said anything, she stopped and grew irritated.

"But Bebe said she'd rather be here and... Are you even listening?" She asked. Kenny stopped what he was doing and looked over to her.

"You're all upset because Bebe says she'd rather live here than a big city area, and you think that the big cities have more to offer. However, by the sound of your voice, you think that cities are also really scary places, and my not be exactly what you want." He scratched his head and continued mixing the ingrediants, while Wendy watched in wonder.

Say that five times fast.

Or not, you may hurt yourself.

"I'm sorry. I... uhm... are you done?" She asked politely. He pulled out the blowdryer and waving it quickly over the jacket.

"Yeah, I'm finished." He said, pulling the hood on over his head. "(Thanks, Wendy. You're a bit nicer than what the guys usually say.)" He said, chuckling.

Wendy led him out. "Um... Kenny?" She got butterflies when she said his name, but why?

"(what?)" "Um... do you think that sometimes... you could visit, or I could come over, and just talk? I mean, Bebe doesn't listen like you..." He stared, but waved and walked out.

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Since then, Kenny's been, well, for lack of better words, seeing Wendy. He didn't quite know how to break it to the guys. Especially Stan. He saw how he freaked out when Wendy was just paired up with Kyle.

This was gonna kill both of them eventually. He knew it.

He sighed and walked up her sidewalk, greeted by the smell of that banana pudding stuff her mom made, with the Nilla Wafers in them.

He kinda liked Nilla wafers.

And so he and Wendy would talk, and eat pudding with Nilla Wafers, and get along pretty well.

And he wouldn't wear his parka, either.