The car wash looks exactly as Sid described it: painful. When I saw the plan for the afternoon, I noticed quite a few holes and if this is really the only time that we get the players all together to record and film things then I want to make the most of it. I added a few photo shoots and a couple extra pieces of video. The biggest change was a 'making of' shooting. This is something the fans never get to see and they love the behind the scenes material; thus began my first argument with Tom. After I reviewed the plan, I went to Tom's office hoping that he would feel more comfortable there than being 'summoned' to mine. After talking to him about the day and a couple of the additions I wanted to see, I decided to approach the behind the scenes. "Tom, the In the Room series has been so popular, I wonder if there's an opportunity to do something at the car wash?" I pause and take a breath but can't go any further because Tom jumps in. "We have a very full afternoon and there is no way that I can supervisor filming and do everything that I have to do for the day." I take a deep breath and put a smile on my face. "I can appreciate that Tom. Why don't we look at what I can be involved in so that you can do some of the filming." This was the comment that made his face turn beet red. "So now you want to take over the whole thing?" I take a mental breath this time because all I want to do is smack him upside the head. "Tom, that's not what I said. I asked if there were some of your activities that I can help with so that you are freed up for the filming." He stands now but I stay seated in his visitor chair. "There is no way that you are taking over this thing. I put my heart and soul in planning it meticulously and building it to a well-run afternoon. I'm not letting you take it over!" He is raising his voice now and getting very aggressive so it's time for me to put an end to this, immediately.

I stand as well but speak softly. "Tom, I understand your point of view and appreciate that you are passionate about doing the best job that you can. This afternoon, I want you working with the cameramen for In the Room and taking as much 'behind the scenes' footage as you can. You can take the next few hours to plan your shots and review it with your filming team. I will take over all of your duties during the event so that you can focus on this activity." He opens his mouth so I glare at him hard and he closes it quickly. "I also want you to take this opportunity to consider how you've approached this meeting, how you spoke to me and how you would like our relationship to move forward. I'm telling you right now that this is the last time you will raise your voice to me and attempt to physically intimidate me. My goal is to help out this season and make it a success. That includes working well with the entire communications team. You have to decide if you want to participate because this" I use two fingers to gesture between us "will never happen again." I pause for a moment to let that sink in and then I turn and leave the room.

I can feel myself begin to shake as I head down the hall. I was able to control it inside Tom's office but I can't control it anymore. I feel my hands start first and cross my arms but I know that won't do any good. My focus is on simply getting to my office, shutting the door and having a minor meltdown. When it's out of my system then I'll be fine. I just need to get it out and then compose myself again. "Sloan?" I hear someone call my name but I keep moving toward my office. The office is my goal now and when I reach it then I know everything will be ok. Just as I'm entering it, I feel a hand on my arm. I can't help it, I flinch and pull my arm away quickly. I see that it's Sid and damn his bad timing. Before I completely break down I say "Sid, can I find you later. I'm late for something." I know it's a lame excuse but can't think of anything else other than being alone. He looks like he's going to leave but then he says "are you ok?" I manage a "yeah" and turn praying that he won't follow me. I hear the door close and sigh in thanks. When I turn around I'm surprised that Sid is still in my office. He shut the door but stayed on this side.

He goes to the small fridge in the corner and grabs two bottles of water. He walks over to me and hands me one and then gestures to the sofa and chair in the corner. I follow him over and sit down. Drinking down half the bottle, I try to calm myself down with some deep breathing. While I wish I was alone, maybe having him here is helping me hold it together better because I need to; it wouldn't be good to break down in front of the star client. I feel my heart rate slowing and the sweat drying up. Thank God the panic attacks come less and less often but, because they do, they catch me off guard and are brutal. I open my eyes and see that Sidney is staring at me thoughtfully. What the hell am I supposed to say to him now? "Our team shrink taught me how to do that deep breathing thing. Mostly before the finals when we won the Cup. I would get anxiety and it really helped." I'm stunned that he's sharing this with me. Aren't players supposed to have extreme bravado and ego? If he's being so candid with me then I guess I need to give him something. "Yeah, it usually helps me. I just had a run in with one of my staff and it got particularly nasty. I had to pull the 'boss' card and tell them what they're doing; which didn't go over very well." Sidney nods, takes a drink of his water and says "sometimes the coach has to make the call. Every player has their role and as a centre, I call the plays on the face off. Occasionally, usually when the game is on the line, coach will take a time out and call the play himself. He's the coach and that's his job. My job is to execute the play he called to the best of my ability." Oh my God, he's intuitive, self-effacing and agreeing with me. I just don't understand him. Of course the altercation with Tom, in and of itself, wasn't the reason that I was shook up but we'll let Sidney think so.

Wanting to change the subject, I ask "were you looking for me?" At my question he turns beet red. Seriously, this is the best hockey player in the world? He's blushing! It isn't often that I'm wrong but I definitely was in thinking this guy would be an arrogant ass. I'm very rarely wrong about people; however, I'm clearly wrong this time. I wait for him to take another drink of his water and then he says "I heard Michelle say that you're going to film some behind the scenes things this afternoon." Oh, he wants to talk about work. Why do I feel slightly disappointed? "Yeah Sid, the fans love it and I thought we'd take advantage of showing behind the scenes of the car wash. Most will never have even heard about it before." He nods and replies "it's a good idea." That's all he says; he doesn't continue at all. I nod and say "thanks" then we simply sit here looking at each other. I guess one of us needs to say something. Why do I feel like this is a first date? "I see that they have you doing some extra promos. I guess you're used to that by now, huh?" He nods at me and replies "yeah, there are usually a few extras for me. I also have some stuff to sign too." I never thought about that; he must always have 'extra stuff' to do that the other guys don't. I've seen his schedule and it's crazy busy. Part of that could be because of the shortened season but I'm getting the feeling that this guy always tries to do the extra things.

"I heard that you're thinking of doing some extra stuff for the fans at games" he says. At first I wonder how he would have heard about it and then I realize it must be from Mario. "Yeah, I think we've decided to offer discounts on merchandise for the first game and then we'll do concession discounts for a few more." He nods then says "I heard that some of the other teams have heard about it and are going to do the same thing." This surprises me. We just finalized it this morning and it's already out there. I guess the hockey world is very, very small. He must notice that I'm surprised because he continues. "They would have told the NHL offices and then it spreads from there very quickly." I nod now and add "and I thought gossip spread fast in Hollywood." We both chuckle a bit. "I think I heard that you trained in LA during the summer, right?" He nods and says "yeah. I love the weather and the beaches. There's a few guys that training out there for a few weeks. We share the same trainer and he puts on a few camps for us where we do both on ice and off ice stuff." Wow, this is the longest thing Sid has said to me. I guess talking about hockey opens him up. I really want to keep him talking and with me so I start asking questions about the team.

For the first time since I met Sid, he's become animated and even smiles when he recounts a particularly spectacular goal that Dupuis made in practice yesterday. He doesn't like to talk about himself but he's eager to give his team mates praise. I can see why they made him captain. I've long since stopped taking in his words because I'm so preoccupied with his eyes, his lips, the way his tongue darts out to moisten his lips. Damn, for not the first time I can't help thinking that this man is sex on a stick.


I'm so glad that she's smiling. I was really worried at her reaction when I called out to her. It was like she was running away and when she turned to look at me I started getting really worried. She looked like the proverbial deer-in-the-headlights and she was stark white. I'm glad that I didn't listen when she said that she was ok. It took a little while for her to calm down but she did the deep breathing thing that the shrink taught me and it helped. No sooner had that thought entered my head then it was out of my mouth and I tell her about the team shrink. What the fuck is this woman doing to me? She didn't seem to want to chat but she also wasn't in any hurry to get rid of me. When she asked about hockey I almost breathed a sigh of relief. At least I know hockey. I can talk about hockey and for the next ten minutes or so I do just that. I'm not even sure what I'm saying at this point. Regardless of what I'm saying, it allows me to look at her beautiful smile, that sexy dimple and her fathomless eyes.

The knock on her door startles both of us. "Come in" she calls out and stands. Michelle and Sam come in and then Sam says "oh, I'm sorry to interrupt. We can come back." Sloan shakes her head and gestures them in. I know that this is my cue to leave so I get up and walk to the door. "Sid" Sloan calls to me so I turn around. She smiles, pauses and then says "thank you." I hold her gaze for a long moment getting lost in the gorgeous blue of her eyes then I nod and leave her office.

Walking down the hall, I think back to when I saw her almost running down the hall. The moment I saw her, I knew that something was wrong. What made her so scared? She was much more than upset; she was scared. When I saw the fear on her face, I didn't think. I followed her into her office and shut the door. She would have preferred if I was on the other side but I couldn't leave her alone. Finding her bar fridge, I grabbed a couple bottles of water and gestured for her to sit. As we talked, I saw her begin to relax and calm down. She even smiled a few times and I think we were having fun until the knock on her door. Although I searched, I couldn't think of a reason to stay so I left. When she thanked me and gave me a tentative but warm smile, I think my heart was lost in that very small moment.

Now, as I sit in the locker room fully dressed and waiting to be called for pictures, I run our encounter over and over in my mind. I've never had such a short interaction have such an impact. I've been hot for her since I first saw her walk by in that short, tight skirt that I'm happy she's also wearing one today, but today there was more. Fuck, maybe Duper's right and I just need to get laid. It just doesn't feel right thinking about Sloan as a quick fuck. She's Ron's daughter too. That makes it infinitely more complicated. "Sid!" I hear my name called and make my way towards the ice. One of the guys tells me where they want me to skate, stop and when to look into the camera. They make it sound so important like it's a shootout. I skate, like I've been doing since I was two years old, then I stop like I've been doing since I was two and half years old and then I look into the camera. When the director says 'action,' I follow the instructions; skate, stop, look. That's when I see Sloan standing at the edge of the ice. "Cut! Sid, after you've stopped, I need you to look into the camera. It looked like you were looking off to your left in the last shot." Fuck! Yes, I was looking off to the left. I was looking at the most beautiful woman I've ever seen on the ice in impossibly high heels and that short skirt.

I reset and complete the sequence again only this time I look into the camera. They make me do it two more times and then I'm ushered onto the next activity. A few more pictures in full gear and then off to the locker room to change. After a quick shower and change, I leave the change room and find Sloan at my stall. When she sees me, she stands and offers me a clean jersey. She takes a quick look around and then whispers "Sid, thanks for earlier. I'm very sorry that you had to see that but I do appreciate your support." I don't get why she's apologizing to me so I just nod. "You have your team photo and then some stand ups for future video." She gestures for me to follow her so I do. Usually I have one of the interns or temps walk me through this so I'm not sure why Sloan is doing it; not that I'm complaining about it. I follow her and can't help but watch her fine ass in that tight skirt. Yeah, I'll follow Sloan anywhere she wants to go.

We head down the hall and I know we're going to do the player photo first. The make-up person does a few things to my face. I hate it but am too used to it to complain. They do the same thing for sit-down interviews. They know me well by now and don't touch my hair. I'm set up and they take a few test shots to make sure everything works then we start; neutral face, smile now, bigger, smaller. It's crazy and I just try to follow instructions so that I can get it done as fast as possible. God, apparently my smile isn't good enough for the photographer. What the hell does the guy want? I'm a hockey player and not a model. Trying not to roll my eyes, I look away from the photographer because there's no way that I'll be smiling at him and make it genuine; I want to punch him. Looking to his right I see Sloan and that's all I need to smile. It's weird how someone I didn't even know a day ago can instantly make me smile.

As we leave the room, Sloan leans into me and whispers "I don't know how you have the patience. It would drive me crazy to be in front of a camera so much in one day." I feel her breath on my neck and break out in goose bumps. I feel an answering twitch in my dick and pray that it stays at a twitch. At least the jersey's long enough to hide anything for pictures but I will have to take it off at some point. I turn to smile at her and didn't realize that she was still close in to me. I almost catch her lips with mine. Of course the 'almost' part means that our heads knock together. What is it with me lately? I'm either walking into her, catching her when she'd rather be alone or banging my head into hers. Thankfully she's laughing. It's an incredible sound and so infectious that I'm laughing too. "Sid, please don't tell anyone that happened. I don't want it to get out that after only one day here I've injured the franchise player." I follow her again and we go into an office. It's time to do voice overs. As I rhyme off the required script for the various radio stations, I am acutely aware of how small the office is and how close Sloan is sitting next to me. When she tosses her hair back, I catch a whiff of her perfume and flub a line. This is crazy. I am going to have to stay away from her or I'm going to have to man up. The problem is that I don't think that I can do either.