Unrappin' Drakken - Chapter 4 - You Are My Sunshine

This story is not for profit. I don't own Kim Possible or the wonderful character Estelle Harris brought to life. While I'm at it, hats off to Carol Ann Susi/Mrs Holowitz, Howard's mom.

Kim watched Drakken assault the karaoke player. He picked it up and rattled it around like an unwanted birthday present. It appeared that he was annoyed that his next musical number was not as readily available as he liked. After a few moments, he stood, closed his eyes, placed the microphone close to his scarred face and waited for the song to begin.

The blue scientist's voice once again filed the cavernous lair. He had flair for performing, Kim reluctantly acknowledged. She just wished he would improve on his song selection; but right now she would be happy if he would just stop. If Drakken's persistent quests to rule the world were anything to go by, the hero knew the mad man would not just give up.

Crazy, I'm crazy for feelin' so lonely,

I'm crazy, crazy for feelin' so blue...

I knew, you'd love me as long as you wanted,

And then someday, you'd leave me for somebody new.

Worry, why do I let myself worry?

Wonderin', what in the world did I do?

"Shego, are you sure this is going to work?"

"No, but we don't have a choice. He's not coming out on his own. Kimmie, I don't know if you've noticed this, but Dr D is slightly obsessive. Once he starts, he can go on for days," said the villainess confirming Kim's assessment of the scientist.

"Oh, don't say that. I just want this drama to be over with." The red head said rubbing her temples. She was exhausted. The day had started well for her. She had been looking forward to it but Drakken was eroding that optimism with each sorrowful love song.

"Pumpkin, what happened to the Possible can do attitude of yours?" Shego said with a smirk.

"I have never dealt with a psychotic Drakken before. Actually, this is the longest I've ever spent in his company. Usually by now I would have foiled his plans a few times over and it would have been GJ's job to listen to his angry ranting. How did you put up with him for so long and still manage to have a witty comeback when we fought?" said the hero with a smirk of her own.

"Ha, ha. Very funny Princess," Shego said dryly.

Ron walked over to the two women. "Ladies, she's here."

"Finally!"

The three watched a solitary figure slowly walk up to the work area. She was short in stature and very homely looking. Her yellow dress decorated with large blue flowers was not flattering to her figure, catching on parts of her body that had expanded over time. It spoke of another era, as did the shape of her glasses and the tangerine colored hair that was stiffened with years of practice. Her bright pink lipstick was too young for her age and it clashed with her outfit, and the matching green shoes, earrings and large bag.

"Where is he? Oh, there he is... hello, hello..." said the older woman waving at the blue man. Drakken continued singing, oblivious to the recent arrival. "Why can't he hear me?"

Kim watched Shego roll her eyes before replying, "Its because his singing is drowning out everything else."

Oh, crazy, for thinkin' that my love could hold you...

I'm crazy for tryin' and crazy for cryin

And I'm crazy for lovin' you.

"How do I get his attention?" asked the newcomer.

"Just press the big button on the console," the green woman instructed.

"This one?" Slender fingers poised over a red button.

"No!" Shego and the henchman screamed simultaneously.

Bob approached the older female. "Mam, please don't touch the red button. If you would like to use the intercom, just press this big green button and just talk," the henchman politely explained.

"Thank you, young man." Bob stepped back to give the tangerine haired woman some room. A wrinkled hand pressed the button as instructed. "Drew-bee, mama is here..."

KPKPKPKP

Shego's beautifully expressive face showed her displeasure. "Pumpkin, why do I have to be the one to do this?"

"Because Mama Lipsky knows you work for Drakken. And besides, she thinks I'm a patient. Remember on that Mother's Day mission when I was tied to my mom? She actually bought Drakken's lame explanation that it was part of my therapy."

"Well, I'm not happy." Shego was pouting. It wasn't in the range of what the Possible women were capable of but it was pout nonetheless. Kim chose not to mention it. She was trying to convince Shego not put her off completely. The red head thought a little gentle goading wouldn't go astray. "You're not afraid are you, Shego?"

The most wanted woman on the planet seemed to know she was being played. The expression on her face was telling. "Kimmie, I know what you're doing and its not going to work. For your information, I'm not afraid. I just don't want to talk to the woman. She's even more annoying than her son. Besides, I haven't forgiven her for last time."

"Do I want to know?" Kim asked cautiously.

"She actually said to me, 'Looks like you missed your chance with my boy, honey.'" Shego had once again broken out into her Mrs Lipsky impersonation. She was turning out to be quite the mimic. Kim and Ron giggled.

"Laugh it up, Kimmie, but just before that special moment, the conversation was about you."

"What about me?" Kim stopped laughing. She began to dread where this was going.

Shego smirked at the change in demeanor. "Mama asked whether you were one of the Doc's friends before saying, 'This Kim must be some special girl.'" The nasal caricature was spot on. Kim's face started to turn red. Ron laughed at his friend's discomfort.

"Well, one of us has to make the call," the vexed hero said trying to get the conversation back on topic. Shego just shrugged in response.

Ron put a reassuring hand on his friend's shoulder. "I'll do it. Mrs Lipsky doesn't know me. We don't want to panic her.

"Maybe she can bring some food," the blond man said cheekily.

"Ron! How can you think of food? We're on a mission." Kim couldn't believe that Ron was thinking of his stomach instead of Drakken's welfare.

"Well it's not really a mission. The only bad thing the Doc is doing is murdering any sense of good taste. We've been here for hours. I'm really hungry."

"Ron, its still rude to ask."

"KP, she's a Jewish mother. She lives to feed."

"Ahhhhh..." Kim said in frustration.

The villainess decided to break up the argument. "Guys, save this domestic for another time. We need to stop Dr D. Stoppable, make the call."

"OK, but I can't do it here. If Mrs Lipsky hears Drakken singing and ranting in the back ground she'd be able to pick up that something is wrong and is more likely to race over here in record time. And with no food."

"Good point. OK, follow me," said Shego. She turned, and walked towards a door the red head knew lead deeper into the lair. The heroes followed.

"I still think it's rude to ask," mumbled Kim.

KPKPKPKP

Shego opened the large wooden door and ushered the pair into the room. She made sure she shut the door behind them. They were now insulated from the sounds of Drakken. The room was austere. The high ceiling and small window disqualified it from being classified as a shoebox. The walls were completely bare and tinted in a light grey hue; the functional concrete floor was slate colored. A small bathroom was located off to the side. A queen sized black-framed futon was positioned in the centre of the room. An olive colored comforter covered the mattress. Alongside it was a small wooden bedside table and beyond that was a sliding wardrobe. They were the only other pieces of furniture in the space. A couple of green and black jump suits were peeking out from the wardrobe.

The villainess watched Kimmie take in her surroundings. Recognition flashed across the red head's face as she eyed the wardrobe. "Shego, is this your room?"

"Yes, Princess. What of it?" The green felon asked. She was a little unsettled bringing the heroes into her domain under such circumstances, especially Kimmie. She would have preferred to plan the occasion. Maybe made it more of a special experience.

"It's not at all what I was expecting," Kim stammered.

"What were you expecting?" Shego asked curiously. The hero instantly flushed. Ron answered for her. "This room reminds me of the rooms at the school Yori teaches at. It's got that whole monastic vibe happening."

"The Yamanouchi?" The blond man did not answer. He just stared at Shego. He appeared to be shocked. "Stoppable, I didn't pick up my fabulous moves or sexy figure from a magazine. Believe it or not, I studied there for a while. It taught me a bit of discipline. And to control my temper."

The young heroes showed their disbelief. Shego became defensive. "My temper is a work in progress." Kim cocked an eyebrow at the green woman. "I admit it doesn't always work but I'm trying OK. Hey, I've been with Drakken all these years and he's still alive right?"

Shego became uncomfortable with the turn of conversation and wanted the attention away from her. She turned to Kim. "So, Kimmie, does that mean you've thought about where I sleep?" The black lined smirk returned with a vengeance.

Kim's flush matched the intensity of her hair. She became a little flustered as she replied, her voice faltered. "Nooo…"

"Are you sure? Because your reaction says yes to me." Shego was enjoying this, as was Ron judging from the look on his face.

"OK, I have thought about. But not for long," the hero quickly added. "I just imagined you to live in a more hedonistic environment. Something cabaret like." Shego raised her shapely eyebrow in response. "You do like your massages. This room is soo…. bare" Her voice trailed off.

"Well firstly, I don't consider this home. It's a place I occasionally sleep. As you know Dr D's lair don't last the distance so I see no point in carrying around personal stuff from lair to lair. I have a home that is my sanctuary. Believe it or not, I do like to keep things simple. As much as I enjoy a good cabaret it's not who I am at home. And if I've worked hard, I will treat myself," Shego replied matter-of-factly.

"Oh."

She placed her hands on her hips before asking snidely, "So, are we over this getting to know Shego session? Can we get on with things?" The heroes nodded their agreement.

The villainess reached down into her pouch and pulled out a small device before throwing it to the young man. "Stoppable, here's my cell. She's under Mama L. Keep it simple. And for heavens sake stay calm."

Kim walked over to the low bed and sat down on the olive comforter, crossing her legs in front of her. Shego decided to sit near her and did the same. She did not want to appear too eager so she focused on Ron. "Stoppable, we don't have all day. Are you going to do this or what?"

"Yes, I'm just trying to centre myself. Hang on." Ron took a deep breath and then exhaled. "Ladies, I don't mean to be rude but I need to do this with my back to you. I don't want to be distracted." The blond man turned to face the window.

"Stoppable, just call the woman!" Shego said threateningly. She couldn't understand why he was stalling. He was the one that volunteered to call after all.

"OK, OK. Here goes. It's ringing... Hello, Mrs Lipsky? Sorry to bother you. My name is Ron Stoppable. I work with your son Drew, on his radio show. Oh, yes it has wonderful ratings. You wouldn't believe the people listening in. And Drew gets the most fantastic guests dropping by.

"Anyway, the reason I'm calling is that we have a slight issue here at the studio and we need your help. No, no, no Mrs Lipsky, there's nothing for you to be concerned over. …

Shego was listening to Ron stretch the truth to Dr D's mother, and was amazed how smoothly he was doing. She was surprised when she felt a hand above her knee. Shego looked down and then at Kimmie. Kim's face was intent, her gaze seemed to bore a hole in her best friend's back but Shego knew better. Smiling, she reached down and turned Kim's hand over. Feminine fingers intertwined before finally resting on the Shego's thigh.

"….. well earlier today Drew become a little upset over a caller, and we would like your help in calming him down. It's nothing serious. He just needs a mother's touch. Are you able to drop by the studio? Oh you can? That's wonderful. We are at the Upperton studio today. Would you like the address? Oh, you've been here before? Then it shouldn't be a problem for you.

"I think Drew would love to see you. Maybe we could make an occasion of it. Perhaps you could join us for afternoon tea. Oh, you will bring pie? Homemade pie? Even better. Drew has told me you're an excellent cook. I'm a foodie myself. I look forward to trying your cooking. Maybe we can swap tips. When will you be able to stop by? An hour? Fabulous. Mrs Lipsky, I look forward to meeting you too. Goodbye."

The blond man hung up and then turned to face the women. "How was that?"

"Ron, I can't believe you asked for food!"

"KP, I told you I would. It's not like she's going out of her way either. She made a pie this morning and will bring it along with her. Besides, everyone likes pie. Just ask Shego," he said giggling. He was looking down at the intertwined fingers.

Shego could feel her face heat up. She knew she was blushing but she did not want to react to Stoppable's teasing. "So, we have an hour?" Ron nodded.

"We need to get this place cleaned up. All the doomsday stuff needs to be thrown into a closet. We can get the boys onto that. Oh, Kimmie don't let me forget. We need the boys to get into their civvies and stop looking like henchmen."

Kim frowned. "Shego, there's no need for that. Drakken's mom has seen them in their outfits."

"I know Kimmie, but trust me, I have my reasons. Stoppable, remember what I told you earlier?" The hero nodded. "Well, you need to get onto to it soon."

Kim jumped up and rubbed her hands together. "Alright, let's turn this place from a super villain's lair into a super talk back radio studio."

KPKPKPKP

Summer Gale leaned against a wall. Her limbs were shaking. She decided that the first thing she did once her reputation was restored was to join a gym. She wanted to look fabulous for the cameras. She was seriously out of shape. She knew that the alcoholic poisoning was a component. The hideous henchman's outfit was not letting her skin breathe. Drakken's attempts at country music were giving her a splitting headache. And she was still dehydrated. The main cause was the frenzied physical activity of the past thirty minutes.

Fifteen minutes after the trio disappeared, they returned with a plan to clean up the lair. For some reason, the order was to make the lair look less incriminating. Shego ordered the henchman to get rid of anything in plain sight that hinted of Drakken's nefarious ways. As Summer did not want to blow her cover, she had to go along with it.

Summer could not believe how many blue prints lay about. Drakken was obviously a man who didn't believe in preserving the rain forest or using computers. There were devices that needed to be dismantled, many robots in various stages of construction and now deconstruction. There was also the brain switching machine and the truth ray.

Shego saved them the trouble of pulling apart the broken clone machine. She blasted the apparatus to smithereens. Apparently she hated cloning. The super charged woman then proceeded to blast the dimensional compiler. She claimed it was the reason that she now hated TV. It was something to do with a Mr Sit Down. Her green glow intensified when Kim started humming the theme song.

The storeroom proved to be a problem. It was chock-a-block full of boxes of a product called Dr Drakken's Brainwashing Shampoo and Cranium Rinse. Perched right on top was a small memory ray. Shego demanded that once the situation with Drakken was over the henchman were to take out the shampoo and flush it down the toilet, where deserved to end up. Until then the unopened boxes were stacked in the hallway. All the parts that were just dismantled were shoved crudely inside the storeroom. Summer watched Shego pocket the memory ray.

Kim inspected the newly sanitized lair. The hero looked as if she was energized by the clean up. Summer hated her even more at that moment. "Shego, the lair is presentable. What do we do now?"

Shego addressed the puffing henchmen. Summer had the feeling the villainess was lingering on her. "Guys, the Doc's mom is coming around in about fifteen minutes."

"Oh no, not his mother. She's even more annoying than what he is," said Bob.

Becker shuddered, "Yeah, her voice is worse than nails on the chalkboard."

"Becker, you're showing your age."

"Shut up, Stevens."

"Guys, enough. The next one who opens their mouth gets a plasma surprise.

"As I was saying, his mom will be here soon. I need you to act like we all work for the Doc's radio show. I want you to get cleaned up. I can smell you all from here. Go shower, put your street clothes on and come back as soon as you can."

"Boss, we've worn these outfits in front of the Doc's mom before."

"Bob, I'm aware of that. I just don't want to take any chances of her twigging. You guys seriously smell. Now, go!"

Summer's stomach sunk. She would have loved to see this to the end. But right now there was a chance she could be found out. She had to get out of there fast without making it obvious. Summer decided that she would go through the motions of doing what the henchmen did and at the first opportunity she would run back to her car.

The three men moved to go to their quarters. Summer made sure she casually followed. As they passed through the door she realized she was holding her breath. She exhaled deeply. Now to find the back door. She needed help. "Ah Bob, I need to get out of here. What's the best way?"

"Go down to the end of the corridor, take the first door to the left, the left again and then right through the gym."

"So left, left and then the gym?"

"Right," chipped in Becker.

Summer rolled her eyes at the lame Abbott and Costello routine. Becker caught the action. "You can't miss it. Your stuff is near the back door."

"Gentleman, you have all been very helpful. Thank you for your efforts. When this is over I will get in touch and finalize our deal." Summer reached over and shook three meaty hands. "Goodbye for now."

"See ya."

"Bye."

"See, you on the dark side."

Summer walked through the lair trying to find the gym. After a few false turns she found it. It wasn't like the ones she visited. It was more basic, more like a boxing gym. As she travelled through it, something caught her eye, a gilded frame. The stolen artwork was in plain view, simply resting against a pile of martial arts mats. It was free from it its confinement.

All thoughts of a quick get away left Summer. The journalist inside her insisted she needed to take a closer look. She walked across and stood in front of the painting. She wished she could take it with her. Instead she reached out and touched the frame. Summer knew that in the real world she would never be permitted to be this up close and personal to a hundred and fifty million dollar masterpiece. Her fingers left the frame and traced the bold brush strokes. God this was an ugly piece of work, she thought.

"Is that any way to treat a lady?" Summer spun around. She was busted.

KPKPKPKP

Oh, crazy, for thinkin' that my love could hold you...

I'm crazy for tryin' and crazy for cryin

And I'm crazy for lovin' you.

"Drew-bee, mama is here..."

The blue man instantly stopped singing. His mouth was open but seemed unable to say anything. He just stared at his mother. His fingers gripped the microphone tightly.

"Drew-bee, tell your mama what's wrong. Are you sick? The young man that phoned said that a caller upset you. Is that what this is about? Has my Drew-bee been working too hard? Are you in trouble? A problem shared is a problem halved. You should know that being a radio doctor."

Drakken's face crumbled. He began to cry. The amplified wailing made the onlookers cringe. "She doesn't love me."

"Who doesn't dear?"

"Amy," said Drakken sobbing.

"Does my Drew-bee need a great big huggy? I brought some pie. Would my little Peter Puffer Puff like some?"

"Yessss."

"Honey, can you come out for your mother?" Drakken nodded. He placed the microphone down and meekly emerged from his workstation. His mother greeted him at the door with a crushing bear hug. Drakken cried on his mother's shoulders.

"Drew-bee, you need to move on from this. You'll meet another girl; one that can see how smart, warm and helpful you are. Hopefully she'll be a doctor.

"Amy is a doctor."

"If Amy can't see the good in you, she's not worthy of your love. But first you need to make things right and move on," Mrs Lipsky said reassuringly.

Drakken lifted his head and looked at his mother. "Move on, mother?"

"Honey, you need to get a real job, one that show cases your talents. You need to give up on the evil genius career."

Drakken was momentarily speechless. "Oh, doodles!"

"There will be none of that doodles talk. You how I feel about it."

"But how did you know?" Drakken spluttered. "When did you know?"

"I've known for years. I'm your mother. A mother knows these things." Mrs Lipsky put a hand on her hip and started tapping her foot. "I thought I had taught you better manners than to lie to me."

Kim nudged Shego in the ribs. "Is there a mother's handbook because that's what my mom said to me to me this morning."

Shego giggled in response. "Pumpkin, you can't lie. Dr D on the other hand... "

Drakken's mother heard her. She moved closer to the green woman and pointed a finger in Shego's direction. "Do you think I'm really that stupid, young lady? Where do you think my Drew-bee gets his intelligence? Its certainly not from his father."

Mrs Lipsky grew more exasperated. "Do you honestly think I believed that Drew was working on radio?" Shego did not respond.

"Did you not stop to consider that I would be interested in following what he did? I could never find him on the radio. Whenever the pair of you were put in jail, it some how co-incident with your 'vacation' time, or the 'non-ratings season.'

"I saw the alien invasion. Do you think you could hide that from me? I watch the news. I saw what it did to Middleton. And if I happened to miss one of the news reports, one of the ladies at bingo would kindly fill me in. 'Isn't that you son Drew?'"

The room was stunned into silence.

"Now, Drew Theodore P. Lipsky, I will take no more nonsense from you. I've let you sow your oats and given you space." There was a collective shudder at the thought. "You will apologize to every person you have wronged and you will get into the family business of making coat hangers until you can prove to me you have reformed. Your cousin Eddie has already joined the fold. You can start using your science for good."

Mrs Lipsky turned to face her audience. She addressed the newly unhooded henchmen. "When was the last time you men called your mothers? When was the last time you had given her something to be proud of?"

Stevens started crying. "I miss my mother." Drakken's mother walked up to Stevens and hugged him. "What are you waiting for young man?"

The young heroes were next. "My son is not a fighter. He's really a good boy. He won't be bothering you anymore."

Finally, Mrs Lipsky addressed Shego. "I understand that you have been loyal to my Drew all these years but you too need to move on. All you have been doing is enabling him. It's time to break up this co-dependant relationship. You're an attractive girl. I'm sure you can make that work in your favor. Find your own doctor."

With that Mrs Lipsky grabbed her son's arm and gently guided him out of the room. "Come Drew-bee. Lets go home and have that pie."