Instinct
By: A Villainess Foul
A Twilight Fanfiction by Villainess Foul © 2010
Title: Instinct
Author: Villainess Foul
Rating for this chapter: OT "older teen" (For language and the use of the word 'Cock')
Summary: I take over at the beginning of New Moon. It was instinctual for vampires to find their mates and When Bella cut her finger, Jasper got a whiff of her blood and knew...that she would be his.
Pairing: Jasper/Bella, Emmett/Rosalie, Carlisle/Esme, Charlie/Sue, Jacob/Alice, Edward and The werewolves are going to be my wildcards. Who knows what the fuck I'll end up doing with those guys. lol.
Disclaimer: I do NOT own Twilight, or it's franchises. Stephenie Meyer does. If I owned Twilight I wouldn't have had twilight glitter being sold in stores like hot topic and my vampires wouldn't sparkle. Jasper would still be sexy though.
( Jasper's PoV)
It was hard to look Bella in the eye.
There was a lot of things I was worried about, Like what she thought of my new red eyes, and of me in general, plus I was kind of afraid that if I looked at her for too long I'd want to just throw her down and fuck the hell out of her.
I didn't really think she'd appreciate that just yet, especially because she still didn't quite understand what was going on.
I watched as she buzzed around her kitchen, sticking whatever she was making for Charlie into the oven and then turning to the sink to grab herself a glass of water. Her emotions were wild, raw and it was one of the reasons I fought so hard to stay away from her in the beginning. She was an empaths wet dream. Anything she was feeling I was feeling just as intensely.
The way she felt emotions was so different from anyone I've ever known, She felt things with every fiber of her being and the way she felt things were powerful enough to get me high.
Bella didn't realize it but her emotions were my drug and it wouldn't be long before I was completely addicted.
God, I sounded like a fucking crack addict.
She finally seemed to have pulled herself together enough to finally talk because she slid in the seat across from me, setting her half emptied glass of water on the kitchen table that was currently the only thing between me and her.
I didn't really know if I should be thankful for this piece of shit table or burn it.
"So..." Bella began biting her lower lip as she thought on how she would begin the conversation, I could feel her anxiousness and like the dirty little addict that I was becoming I soaked it up like a sponge. I contemplated on sending out calm waves just to settle her nerves but I decided against hit. Her emotions were so damn raw and I wanted to feel them all with her.
"Let's start with what happened with you-" She stated, " I don't know what in the hell got into Alice or Edward but I didn't like the way they talked to you. You're family Jasper they should have been more understanding..."
I held up my hand to cut her off, "Darlin' they had every right to be mad at me."
She gave me a confused look then and I internally groaned, did she understand how totally fuckable she looked then? She was testing my willpower and the worst thing about it was that she had no clue she was doing it.
"Jasper, I don't think they do. You fell off the bandwagon...so what? Everyone messes up..."
"I didn't fall off the bandwagon Bella, I jumped off."
Her eyes widened as her mouth slowly formed an 'o' as it dawned on her. After a few minutes of her gaping at me she finally shook her head and said something that completely took me off guard.
"Well then...you don't want to kill me do you?"
what the fuck? Of course not!
"No."
she nodded to herself seemingly satisfied with my answer, "Then, so what? You're a vampire I was kind of expecting something like this to happen to one of you guys eventually anyway. The way Edward used to describe the differences of what it was like from feeding on animal blood and what it was like drinking human blood... I kind of wondered why you guys kept feeding off animals. To me it sounded like you were continuously fighting with yourselves, wouldn't that make you miserable?"
I grinned, and I couldn't help it, Oh Bella did you realize how wonderfully perceptive you were? How ridiculously understanding you were? How insanely forgiving?
"You're right Bella, and it was makin' me miserable."
"Then is some twisted way, that is probably going to land me in hell I'm glad you jumped."
I laughed, and she gave me a studying look. "You know...you seem a lot...healthier..."
"It's because of my recent diet change. I'm not thirsty Bella, for the first time in over a decade I'm not fucking thirsty."
I laughed again, just because the way her emotions kept changing were seriously giving me a high, "I'm stronger, faster, and in complete control of myself again. I'm back to being the predator Darlin', I'm dangerous."
She grinned but I could tell it was forced, "Edward used to tell me he was dangerous all the time. Trying to warn me off..."
"Oh Darlin', he doesn't know what dangerous is."
She frowned and I could feel the shift in her emotions, the pain and the betrayal. It was so intense, and I did my best to send her good feelings just because I didn't want her to feel that way.
She sighed as she slender finger wrapped around her glass a thoughtful expression on her face.
"Apparently he wasn't all talk...he did attack me."
Shit. I knew this was coming.
"He lost control."
"That's what Esme told me."
"Listen..." and she looked up at me her soulful brown eyes locking onto my red ones. "A lot happened that night...and it's going to be hard for you to understand...but please try to realize that despite how docile we act we are NOT human."
she nodded, her eyes practically burning into mine. It was so intense I was tempted to look the other way. " See Vampires rely heavily on Instinct and despite what you think we ARE monsters..." I took a deep unnecessary breath " Jesus I wish I knew how to explain this..."
Bella placed a gentle hand on mine, "Just try."
"We are complicated creatures, and sometimes we can find...mates."
She quirked a brow at this, "so soul mates really exist?" she almost was hopeful and I wanted to cling to it. Maybe she will take this better than I thought...
"Yeah, it's all in the blood. A vampire can figure out their mate by the way they smell."
"So...Edward really was my soul mate?" she asked frowning
I snarled, startling her out of whatever thoughts she was having. "Fuck no."
"Then what..?"
"Just listen." I begged trying to reign in my sudden burst of anger...it was irrational but hearing her talk about Edward threw me in a crazy jealous rage. I really hopped this isn't going to happen all the time. I liked to think I was the calm one.
"Edward isn't your mate darlin' you're his singer. That is two completely different things. You see being his singer makes you incapable of being his mate, because ultimately no matter how long or hard he'll fight it, you'll still end up as his dinner in the end. Last night was a prime example. He lost control and in a desperate rage was going to eat you before anyone else can have you."
The look of shock on her face was nothing compared to the feelings she emitted.
" And the reason he lost control, because when you cut your finger..."
"You smelled my blood..."
Bella, darlin' you really are too perceptive for your own good sometimes.
Her hand flew off mine as if it burned, and she looked at me as if it was the first time we ever met. "That's impossible. You and I can't be soul mates...you didn't hardly even talk to me let alone want me. And your with Alice."
"Correction; I was with Alice and it's not impossible because it's true. I – I did try to keep my distance but to be fair, it was because I didn't want to lose control and eat you. I was trying very hard to behave like a good little vampire."
"This couldn't have been the first time you smelled my blood...I'm accident prone...I had to have cut myself around you before."
I shook my head, "No Darlin' you haven't. The closest I ever was to you while you were bleeding was when Emmett and I were disposing of James. I was a little too preoccupied at the time to really concentrate on your smell, plus the venom that was trying to course through your veins tainted your blood."
"But Alice..."
"What about her?"
"She's my best friend! I can't just..." she trailed off placing her head in her hands as if she were ashamed. I could feel the guilt rolling off of her in waves...
"She knew."
Her head snapped back up so fast I was a little worried she would have whiplash. "what do you mean she knew?"
"Exactly how it sounds. She knew her and I weren't ever meant to have forever at the beginning of our...rocky relationship. And she knew you were my mate before even I had an idea. Edward knew too."
"How...long..?" she croaked out choking back a sob. It pissed me off seeing her so anguished...
"Since the baseball game."
"I-I- oh...God...If Edward knew...Why? Why wouldn't he tell me? If he loved me he would tell me right? If he really loved me...he would have tried to fight harder for me, he would have..."
she was babbling now and I let her. She need to sort this out on her own and approach me completely willing.
She stood suddenly, knocking her chair over in the process. "I need to go. I need time to think."
"Darlin'?"
"I'm sorry Jasper, this is just too much right now."
She ran past me and I could hear her opening the front door only to curse loudly and come stomping back inside. When she came back into the kitchen I quirked one of my eyebrows up in question.
"I forgot that I left my truck back at your house."
I laughed then, hard and long and it felt fucking good. Even better was when Bella broke down and joined in, laughing with me.
Still giggling, she sat back in her seat sighing, "Well, there went my dramatic exit."
I chuckled and just shook my head.
We sat there for who knew how long... seconds, minutes, hours ,days...it didn't really matter, I was with Bella and she was handling the situation better than what I gave her credit for.
"I-I think we should take this slow..." She said at last breaking me out of my wondering thoughts.
"What?" Smooth Jazz...
"I think we should take this slow, I know you say you're my soul mate and everything...but I loved Edward. I still do even though I broke up with him. He was bad for me yes. But it didn't stop my feelings. And...It's going to take me a while to get used to the fact that you're not with Alice anymore either..."
I smiled then and I knew my face was probably going to split from how big it was, "Take all the time you want Bella. We have all eternity."
She jumped a bit in surprise by my words. "Eternity? You mean you're willing too..."
"Change you? Absolutely. What makes you think that I would live one minute of my existence without you?"
She blushed, a deep red from head to toe and I licked my lips.
"Edward was so against it..." she whispered so low I didn't think she realized I heard.
"Edward didn't want to change you because as a Vampire you wouldn't resist me. You'd smell my scent and you're instincts would kick in and you'd be with me."
"I thought it was all in the blood."
"Yeah; while you're still human. When you're a vampire the very scent of my skin would be all you need to know."
"I-It's kind of weird." She admitted
"Vampires are weird." I stated using my serious face before cracking into a grin.
"Wait a second...Edward would have let me grow old and die just because he believed I would leave him?" The sudden burst of anger she had was like a punch in the gut and completely fucking hot. My cock twitched in my pants and I fought hard to not let my thoughts wonder. I needed to be in control...allow Bella to come to me. Not scare her away by whipping my dick out because she made me horny.
"Edward is selfish." I stated waving my hand in the air dismissively as if it were old news. "You forget sometimes darlin' despite how old he is or acts at times he is frozen at seventeen."
"Jasper..." She sighed, then smiled weakly "You're just full of surprises."
"You don't know the half of it darlin'."
"What does that mean?"
"It means we have a lot to talk about still and all the time in the world to talk about it."
She groaned, "Please don't get cryptic. Edward tortured me that way. Always saying things without just coming out and saying it."
"Yeah, but unlike Edward I do intend to tell ya. It's a long story besides I don't want your brain to shut down from an overload." I teased my southern drawl becoming more and more prominent the more I spoke.
"Jasper, do you realize you have an accent?"
"Yes, ma'am."
She just shook her head as she stood again, but instead of running away, she began buzzing around the kitchen again, pulling Charlie's dinner from the oven and setting it on the counter to cool.
"I realized," she began as she pulled plates down from the cabinet. " That you don't have a place to stay."
"I reckon' I don't at the moment."
"Well, you can stay with me."
"What?"
"I know it sounds crazy..."
"It is crazy."
"However," she continued, "I don't want you to leave. No matter what happens I'd like to consider you and the Cullen's as family."
Bella do you realize you are too sweet for your own good? Do you realize what you're offering? Do you realize how much I want you?
"I'll stay."
She smiled then and I can feel the content she was feeling well up as she relaxed. I watched in silence as she plated a good portion of the food she made and wrap it up in foil before setting it in the microwave So when Charlie got home his dinner would be ready and waiting for him.
She turned to face me when she was done her smile wilting around the edges.
"Jasper I just realized something..."
"What is it Darlin'?"
"We have to go back and get my truck."
I groaned. Here we go again.
A/N: So I'm trying really hard and hurry my ass and post this because I literally have to leave for work here in I'd say... five minutes? so this chapter is probably not at it's top form. Somethings I would like to quickly mention;
1.) Right now Jasper is totally thinking with his dick. It won't always be like that, I just kind of theroize that once you find a mate you want to go off and fuck like rabbits. Plus I've never written from a guy's prospective before and well...I know I took some liberties.
2.) this is more like a question really, Would it be okay with all of you; the readers if she already knew about the wolves? because at this point the story can go one of two ways. She already knows about them and we can go straight for the Jasper/Bella lovin' or I can take the long way and introduce the wolves and drive Jasper and Bella apart before bringing them back together AND THEN FINALLY get to all the good Jasper/ Bella lovin'. I'm going to let you guys pick, because I have it planned either you we go.
Okay well, now I'm running late for work. soooo
R+R :3
