Chapter 4: The Aftermath
After a very painful break-up with Grimmjow, Ichigo spent a whole week in silence. He didn't speak to anyone, he didn't answer any questions in class, he didn't greet his friends in the hallway like he usually did. He did nothing and everyone was worried about him. It was like he was completely different person. Shinji tried talking to him but found it useless and just decided to stay close. Starrk tried to talk to him and get silence also, so he would just squeeze his shoulder and tell him everything will be ok. Ichigo disagreed every time he told him that. Ichigo avoided everybody. He wouldn't to lunch just to get away from the sad faces of his friends and the angry face of Grimmjow. In the classed they shared Ichigo would try to sit as far away as possible from Grimmjow knowing he's mad at him. Yhe worst thing was when they did seem to catch each others glances, Grimmjow would give Ichigo the most hate filled stare and it would kill him every time. Ichigo would usually leave to room to cry in private. I kills Ichigo to know that he caused the pain.
By week two Ichigo felt a little better, he was still heart broken but he could speak now. He began going back to lunch but not eating and he still avoided Grimmjow. But today was going to be different, he could feel it. To start the day off Renji, Ichigo's friend since middle school, decided to walk him to all his classes and sit across from him at lunch instead of at the football table with his football friends. Ichigo didn't mind but Renji was a little weird but he was worried about his friend he could understand and it seemed he understood more than he lead on. Renji told Ichigo he knew everything about him and Grimmjow and that he feels bad for the both of them and wished they could get back together. Ichigo tried to deny it but knew he couldn't so he just thanked Renji for caring.
When they were at lunch Ichigo noticed that Renji was staring at him and decided to ask him about it "Red, why the fuck are you staring at me?"
"Your not eatin, Ichigo. Your Ichigo your always eatin, your always hungry. But your not eatin and you haven't been eatin for a whole week, I'm worried about you."
Ichigo smiled, his first real smile in a whole week "Thanks, Red" he took a fry off Renji's plate "Will it make you happy if I ate this"
"I meant getcha own food but yes that would make me happy"
Ichigo ate the stolen fry and reached across the table to get another but was blocked by Renji "What!?" Ichigo said laughingly
"These are my fries get your own"
Ichigo laughed for real this time, it felt good to laugh. "OK fine but I don't have any money"
"So you just thought you were gonna eat my food then"
He laughed again "No I.."
"Renji" They heard someone say
It was Grimmjow and unfortunately for Ichigo he looked and they looked each other in the eye. Ichigo quickly turned his head.
"What!" Renji answered
"Why are you sittin over there" Grimmjow asked rudely
"Cuz Ichi's my friend and I can sit where I want" he said matter-of-factly
"Why can't he sit here?" Ichigo said tired of Grimmjow's bullshit
"Oh It speaks" Grimmjow said glaring at Ichigo with hate-filled eyes
"Grimmjow don't..."Renji said but was cut off by an suddenly angry Ichigo
"What the fuck is wrong with you?"
"What the fuck do you mean?" now even more irritated
"Why do you keep lookin at me like that?"
"Like what?" he already knew how he looked
"Like you hate me"
"Cuz I do" his heart hurt but his pride didn't
Ichigo stood up not angry any more "Really?" he asked softly looking down at the table
"Yup" he said as if he didn't care how Ichigo felt
"Fine" was all Ichigo said before he grabbed his things and walked out of the lunchroom
"Ichigo" Renji called out trying to stop him but nothing happened, he knew Ichigo heard him. He turned to look at Grimmjow "Why would you say that?"
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Shinji, having heard the whole conversation but couldn't get there in time, yelled. He slammed his tray on the table and got in Grimmjow's face, not caring that he had to look up 4 inches. "Why would say that, you asshole"
"Because its the truth, I hate him"
"No" Renji said when he grabbed Shinji by his waist keeping him from punching Grimmow in the face
"Renji, let me go" Shinji said trying to get put of Renji's strong grasp
"No! What are you gonna do?"
Shinji calmed down knowing that Renji wouldn't let him go if he didn't "I'm goin to see Ichi"
"Promise?"
"Yes" Renji let Shinji go and Shinji grabbed his apple juice and walked out
Starrk saw him walking out and called his name and walked up to him "What happen?"
"Why don't you ask your asshole of a cousin" Shinji answered
Starrk looked at Grimmjow and he looked almost happy "What did you do" he asked him
"I told him I hated him"
"Shinji?" Starrk asked
"No Ichigo" Renji said annoyed that his friends were that dumb
"What's wrong with you?" Starrk asked now extremely annoyed with his asshole of a cousin
"Nothing. Why do people keep asking me that?" he laughed coldly
Starrk shook his head "You can't possibly be my cousin. My cousin would never hurt someone on purpose to make himself feel better. I don't know what you did to him but I wish you'd bring him back." he turned to Renji "Come on Renji lets go find Ichigo"
After they left Grimmjow felt terrible. He didn't want to do that to Ichigo but he couldn't help himself the only thing he knows how to be is an asshole, he just can't help himself. He only called Renji because he was jealous that he could make Ichigo laugh and he was jealous of Ichigo because he could laugh while Grimmjow couldn't even smile for real. The look Ichigo gave him hurt him back he didn't mean to make him feel that way. He has to apologize, that's the least he could do, right?
Shinji found Ichigo in the art room, the same place he has been for the past week. He walked over to Ichigo but he didn't notice him because he was staring so far into space. Shinji sat next to Ichigo quietly.
"Are you ok?"
Ichigo jumped then sighed "Yeah, I'm ok. I just feel...I feel..."
"Hurt?"
"Yeah but no" Shinji looked at him to explain. Ichigo chuckled "I'm hurt, extremely hurt. My heart hurts. My head hurts. My eyes hurt. I hurt. It hurts, breakups are hard especially when there with some one you love but what just happen doesn't hurt me. I no longer care if Grimmjow hates me"
"Ichigo" Shinji said with surprise "but you love him"
"Your right, I do love him. I love him more than anything but it looks like he'll never understand how I feel so I'll have to move on and I can't move on if I'm worried about how he feels about me"
"Ichigo, are you ok?" Starrk and Renji said at the same time
He laughed "I'm fine guys you can stop worrying about me"
"So how you feelin?" Renji asked sitting in the table
"Honestly I feel stupid"
"Why?" Starrk asked sitting next to Shinji kissing him when he pouted
"I should have known this would happen, someone with an ego that big would never understand why I did what I did"
"Why did you do it?" Starrk asked
"I'll put it like this" Ichigo said "I wanted Grimm to tell about us but I waited for him to tell instead of making him. I never threatened him, I did nothing but ask him over and over again to tell. The day I broke it off with him I realized Grimm will never tell anyone if he doesn't have to because I'll be with him either way, so I did the only thing I could do and when Grimm figures out what he wants then and only then we'll work it out but right now I'm not willing to do anything"
"That's deep" said an unknown female voice "Ichigo you sound like a mistress" Yoruichi said walking from the door to her desk
Ichigo put his head on the table "I know" he quickly picked his head up "Yoruichi, you can't say anything"
She laughed "I already knew, just like I knew Starrk has wanted Shinji since freshmen year and Renji and Mr. Kuchiki are fucking regularly" Renji's eyes widened "Your not that quiet" she said to him
"Oh God don't tell him you know, he'll make me write whole book if he finds out anyone knows" Renji pleaded
She laughed again "He's so cute when he tries to be mean"
Renji smiled "I know right"
Shinji rolled his eyes "So Ms. Shihoin" he said " What else do you know" they walked over to her desk
"Call me Yoruichi, and I know a lot like the AP calc teacher, Mr. Ukitake, and the AP gov teacher, Mr. Kuraku, have been together since before they started working here. And" She whispered and signaled them closer "You can't say anything but the principal and the secretary have been getting it on for like ever"
"Old man Yama's been..."
"Shhhh" they all put there hands over Renji's mouth
"And last but certainly not least Zaraki and Unohana"
"Fucking?" Renji and Starrk said in unison. She nodded "Be they're so different"
"Yeah" Starrk said "Zaraki's always complaining about her"
"And what is he saying" she said
"Starrk and Renji looked at each other "Oh my god" They said in unison
"And..." the bell rang cutting Yoruichi started but was cut off by the bell "You better get to class"
"Ok" Shinji said "See you guys later in Kuchiki's class"
Grimmjow sat in class listening to the music coming from his headphones and staring at nothing. He feels like shit and there's nothing he can do about it, its his fault he feels that way anyway. There are a million things running through his mind and all of them involve Ichigo. He still loves Ichigo to death but he just doesn't know how to act around him anymore. He still misses everything about Ichigo and he can't help but act like an asshole all the time because he doesn't know how else to act. It gets worse when he's at home. As soon as he walks through the door he goes straight to his room and plays nothing but break-up songs. He can't even lay on his bed because they had sex there. He can't sleep because every time he closes his eyes all he can see is Ichigo's face. Every night he sits at his desk in the dark and thinks. He thinks about every thing, life with Ichigo, life without him. How things would be if he told, how things would be if he never moved to Karakura town. There was no question he missed.
It certainly didn't help that Starrk constantly shook his head at him and gave him that I'm-disappointed-in-you look and then there's Shinji. Every time Grimmjow sees Shinji Shinji gives him the dirtiest look ever. Grimmjow feels like if he even thought about talking to Ichigo wrong while Shinji was around Shinji would jump on him so fast he wouldn't even see it coming. He just wants to apologize to Ichigo but it seems like his pride won't let him.
"Starrk, can you stop staring at me" Grimmjow could feel his cousins eyes burning a hole in the side of his face "I feel bad enough as is"
"Doubt it" was his short retort
He took an headphone out "Ok you don't have to believe me but I'm sorry and I don't know what's wrong with me. I hurt too and I don't know how to let it out. Being an asshole is all I know."
"I see"
"Starrk please talk to me, I can't have everyone mad at me" he pleaded, seconds away from pulling the parent card "please, Starrk, My parents already don't love me."
Starrk took a big sigh and rolled his eyes, Grimmjow always plays the parent card when he wants Starrk to forgive him. "Just stop being an asshole. Anyway, what are you gonna do we all got class together next period?"
"I don't know, ask Mr. Kuchiki if I can talk to Ichigo out in the hall or somethin'"
"I don't think that'll work"
"You think he'll say no?"
"That and Shinji wants to kill you. Damn, he's hot when he's mad. I wonder how much of that anger I can get toward me without getting hit" Starrk thought out loud
"Hey, Whipped" Grimmjow snapped his fingers in front of Starrk's face "Two things. One, not that much he hits before he speaks and two, this is about me"
Starrk snapped out of it "Oh yeah, um you can write him a letter or something"
"But I kinda want to talk face to face"
"You better hope its not fist to face"
"Don't jinx me"
Starrk laughed "Ok how bout we sit in the back and me and Red sit in between you and Shinji so he can't kill you and you can talk to Ichigo"
"Thanks, Starrk. Your a good cousin"
"I know"
They heard the bell ring for the end of the period and Grimmow took a big sigh. He looked over to Starrk and he sighed too. "You know Renji ain't gone be too happy about this"
"I know and that's why I need your help"
"Your gonna owe me big for this"
"I know that too. If you poke Shinji in the belly button he gets horny. Ichigo told me" he said when Starrk gave him a why-the-fuck-do-you-know-that stare
Starrk just shrugged his shoulders "Can't wait to try that"
They walked out of class and headed to Mr. Kuchiki's English class. It didn't take long to get there but to Grimmjow it was too short he needed more time to think. When they walked in and they saw Ichigo and Shinji having a conversation, Shinji still looked pissed. Grimmjow looked at Starrk and Starrk rolled his eyes.
"Blondie" Starrk called
Shinji rolled his eyes and looked past Grimmjow, who was in front of Starrk "What!"
"Can we talk?"
"No"
"Well I tried" he said to Grimmjow, Grimmjow stared at him "Oh my gosh, fine. Blondie, can you come here please?"
Shinji rolled his eyes again and stood up from his seat. He slowly walked over to Starrk. "What" he gave Grimmjow one last dirty look
Starrk cupped Shinji's face and kissed him slowly but passionately. Shinji was surprised but then fell into the kiss and put his arms around Starrk's neck. Starrk liked his lips asking for entrance and Shinji let him and there they were tongue dancing and they both loved it equally. They loved it so much they didn't even notice Grimmjow walk past them and sit next to Ichigo or Mr. Kuchiki walk in.
"There are no displays of affection in my classroom" he said coldly "Go sit down"
They broke apart quickly, Shinji blushed while Starrk grinned "Stop grinning asshole" he said then he noticed Grimmjow in his seat "What the mmmm" he was silenced when Starrk put his hand over his mouth before he could finish his outburst.
"Ow!" Starrk snatched his hand away quickly "You just bit me" he grinned "That's a turn on"
Shinji rolled his eyes "Shut up, perv"
"Seat, find one" said impatiently
"Sorry" they said in unison and sat down in front of Ichigo and Grimmjow
had already begun teaching when there was a knock on the door, already knowing who it was, he walked over to answer it. " " he said coolly "I would advice you to show up to class on time but I know you won't listen so you can write me a paper on being one time and it'll be due tomorrow"
"But I forgot the one from yesterday" Renji whined
"That sounds personal, maybe next time you'll show up to class next time" he turned around and when back to his desk " and Renji when you sit down put those headphones on my desk"
Renji snapped out of his daze "What?" he lost all focus when the teacher turned around because he was too busy looking at his ass
"I said put the headphones on my desk" Renji let out a big, obnoxious, loud, over dramatic sigh before setting the headphones on his desk and walking toward the back of the class "No no no you sit right here" he pointed to the desk in front of his. Renji sighed again and sat down
"What, Grimmjow" Ichigo whispered after the class settled down again
"I want to apologize" he whispered back
"Oh really, what happen to make you wanna apologize to me"
"I feel terrible, Ichigo can you forgive me?"
"For what?"
"For being an ass"
Ichigo laughed a little "Its funny that it takes a break-up for you to apologize for something real and not just to make me feel better"
"Do you forgive me?" he he pleaded
"To be honest I don't even know. I mean I know asshole is all you know but I thought maybe you could act different towards me I thought I was different
"I understand" he was silent for a minute but he had to ask something "Ichigo, why did you break-up with me?"
Ichigo wasn't ready for that question. He wasn't ready to answer that question for Gri
mmjow because it was hard to explain it to him. He hoped Grimmjow wouldn't ask him that for a long time. His heart began to pound to loud he thought the whole classroom could hear. "I needed to" he heard himself say. He didn't know where it came from but he stuck with it.
"Why?"
"Because I needed to breathe, I needed time to think"
"Was it me. Was I holding you to tight?"
"No, it had nothing to do with you" he lied "It was me" he knew Shinji and Starrk were listening and he wished he could see their faces but that was the first lie that came to mind. "I just need time to think about me and when I figure out what I want I'll tell you"
Grimmjow knew Ichigo was lying and he knew it was his fault but instead of arguing with him he just complied. "I just want you to know that I'll always love you"
Ichigo's heart hurt, he had to keep himself from crying "I love you, too"
Sorry for the looooooooong wait its the universe it doesn't like when I write
