Ha, originally I didn't write this with Wheatley tagging along. Just constantly poking his little round sphere through panels as Chell tested and whispered. However, there's no way the all-seeing DRAGON of Aperture isn't going to notice that. Thus, Wheatley was thrown into testing as well. Good luck, you bastard! Hope your flashlight can save you now hahahahaHAHAAHA! (whew, evil is exhausting)
I love Co-op mode. I love it very much. But my co-op partner is prone to playing on an idiot lappy, and dying repeated. Haha! I think she threw herself against a wall, dying 7 times in a row (and killing me once in the process) before we finally managed to finish the test without lag. Dying is the best part.
Sarcasm Still Valid
6/5/11 - Edit 7/21/11
Chell solved the problem of how to carry Wheatley on the elevator to the next test. Folding the upper portion of her jumpsuit out behind her, Chell knotted the sphere into the back with the sleeves so he hung just behind her like a low slung pack. Wheatley was free to move slightly to get a view around Chell, but he couldn't be shaken or jostled free.
"Oh-oh! I see! Clever. Yes. Using wot you've got an all. And fashionable! Latest rage in Paris... or sometfin'. Sorry, don't know much about clothes. Don't normally go about wearing them, you see." Wheatley gave a chuckle. "Does it suit me?" The sphere rolled about in his white metal shell and jostling the orange cloth knotted around him.
Chell laughed again, shaking her head. But orange suited very few people, so it was no loss there.
"So you have resolved the problem with carrying your Testing Protocol Partner on your own? Good. Then I don't have to spend the resources on a disposable testing aid." GLaDOS watched from the red eye of a camera as Chell left the elevator, Wheatley glaring at the camera from behind.
"You know, if you gave me legs, I could-I... wouldn't have to be carried! I can help!" Wheatley's shutters glared at bit at the camera's red eye staring at them.
There was a pause, and then a low chuckle. "You? Help? Please. I did all I could to aid my favorite test subject by making it so you couldn't get in the way." GLaDOS slid the door open to the next test. "After you." The female voice was cool, frigid, and probably promising a painful death if testing didn't start soon. Chell merely set her shoulders and entered the room with a determined expression.
The next test, according to GLaDOS, involved something about thermal discouragement redirection cubes to redirect thermal discouragement lasers? Did Aperture have to hire the entire Department of Redundancy Department and employ them to name EVERYTHING?
Wheatley sighed. "Uhg, wot a name... I think I'll call them … emo cubes. Those little emo boxes are used to discouragement!" He burned up 18 of his allotted 25 words, apparently not counting any sort of unintentional groans or sounds made.
And with a snort, Chell found herself agreeing just a little. Emo cubes it was! Though it was more like a weighted cube with mirrors on all sides than honestly what Chell was picturing. And if one was wondering just WHAT the human was thinking... put a black and unkempt hairstyle on a cube... and some white pancake makeup. Yeah. Because stereotypes are still fun, even in the future.
'Cheer up, Emo-cube!' Chell lifted the mirrored surface, tossing it into the laser's path, 'Vaporization is better than being crushed ANY day of the week.'
"Careful! Careful now, don't burn yourself on-," Wheatley's voice went silent –25 words- right as Chell adjusted the 'emo cube' to bounce the laser into the receiving pod for it. Wheatley gave a sigh of disappointment at his lack of words. But there was only one more portal fired and then the test was solved and done.
"Well done." GLaDOS sounded bored. "Actually – no. I won't congratulate you for such a remedial test. I think we are both beyond such pleasantries anyway. You can just keep testing and I will stop enhancing the truth, instead of padding your ego." However, GLaDOS kept the door to the test room closed, forcing Chell to remain where she stood. It did leave the human wondering if GLaDOS wanted to have yet another rant at her expense since she wasn't being permitted to proceed onwards yet.
Seeing no alternatives, the human sighed and held her arms outwards as if making herself a larger target. 'Ok, computer. Have at it.' It was only verbal abuse after all. 'Bullets and bottomless pits may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.'
"I think I'll be brutally honest. All you are good for is testing. It's a human trait to be remedial in all things, except for the pursuit of science. Name just one thing you've done right. In fact, I'll put a stake against it. Name just one thing that you have done right, and I'll even let you go." GLaDOS taunted.
That was... unfair. First, Chell had no voice to speak with!
And second, she couldn't remember anything of her past at all, other than this facility.
And third, her crowning glory of destroying the central computer of Aperture? … Completely undone by a single accident. The AI just kept coming back like a weed!
So... Chell couldn't think of anything. Escape from the tests? She might have gotten free of a few, but so did the unknown man who made tiny little dens and murals on the walls. She was adept at solving the tests, but that was exactly what GLaDOS was trying to say – that was her ONLY accomplishment. Chell had no achievements, at least none she could recall. A snide little voice in her head reminded her that just pushing endlessly forward didn't make someone special: just pigheaded. A cloud of funk settled over the human as she struggled to remember ANYTHING worthwhile. Being alive seemed like an achievement... but the only person it would benefit would be herself.
"I thought as much." GLaDOS purred, opening the door to the corridor and letting them pass in silence.
Slumping through the blue glimmering grill in a rush to escape the test chamber, Chell felt browbeaten and worn. Wheatley's word count was reset with an electric crackle and he instantly began to speak all in a rush, as if he had compressed his entire sentence into a few seconds of speech in his haste.
"She always lies, don't listen to her," Wheatley rushed the words out. "J-just repeat that! Well... not aloud of course. But-but think it!"
Strange, but with that phrase memories lost with sleep surfaced. That was the same mantra Chell had used to ride through testing, breaking down traps without hearing GLaDOS's furious passive aggressive remarks. It would have been nice to have that mantra up and in place before GLaDOS proceeded to start destroying the lab rat's confidence though.
"I-I... You know, it's just my observation but I-," The core stumbled over his words, awkwardly. Chell reached back and her hand found the cool metal behind her as she gave him a reassuring pat. "-I'm really really glad you saved me. That counts for something, right?" Wheatley finished timidly.
Having a friend with always counted for something.
The test for the next room was still assembling itself. Platforms raised, lasers were turning on, and there was a headache inducing racket. "Auhg! Too loud! Can't even hear myself think!" Wheatley winced, the sound grating on his sensitive hearing.
"Think? Please. When to you ever listen to yourself thinking normally?" GLaDOS gave a snort, cameras of the room swinging to observe the two test subjects.
"Why YOU... I oughta-," Wheatley glared at the camera, but Chell's hand coming around and cupping over his optic shut him up again... Stopping him from wasting words he probably should be spending on helping. Or on just... being Wheatley.
The door behind them slammed shut... 25 word count was now started, and if GLaDOS was running a timer on them (she was probably running three different ones), it had just begun as well. However the sound of squealing metal and concrete slamming into concrete was beyond deafening and was causing an epic headache. Chell felt like her brain was trying to punch its way out of her skull, flip her off, and then stalk out of the room without her. Such dissidence in body parts these days-
Chell spotted a section of wall that had collapsed inwards on a small alcove and decided to retreat there until the din of the lab had finished. Jumping down, she found it was another den of the unknown survivor who had left so many other notes and drawings on the walls. At least down here the horrible racket of the test room setting up was reduced down to a dull grind.
The walls in the alcove were covered in some familiar looking murals using so many different mediums Chell could no longer tell what the wall behind it had originally been painted. Chalk, paint, grease pens, charcoal, watercolor, and what may have been crayon were scribbled in an organized chaos on the wall, forming beautiful but unsettling murals. T unknown person had apparently become a self-modeled artist while they were trapped in here. Age had seen to the murals brilliant colors fading and they were speckled with watermarks long since blurring it together, but it appeared the other survivor hadn't gotten any more sane during the long stay in Aperture. Whoever the person was, Chell really hoped he made it out of here.
Wheatley was looking up at the art with fascination, his optic darting from panel to panel as he compared the art and tried to make sense of it. He remained silent though, as if in an art museum with respect for the other viewers. There were ruined bits of charcoal and grease pens rolled against the wall and Chell pocketed them automatically. One never knew when they would have to write something.
Such as writing your last will and testament. "I, Chell (something or other) of probably-sound mind and body hereby bequeath..." and so on.
Silence struck the woman, as the complete lack of any activity in the testing chamber rolled quiet down into the small hideaway. Firing the portal gun back into the room, and one on the wall, Chell emerged back into the testing facility and found it still and silent, the test once again in an orderly fashion and repairs completed.
"Extended rests are not permitted by the Aperture Science Testing Council. If you feel the need to take an extended rest, please locate an Aperture Science military grade turret and voice your concerns." GLaDOS sounded a bit cross.
'Oh hell no.' Chell glared.
"So angry. Perhaps you would be refreshed by some soothing blues." The computer's camera focused on Chell, buzzing as it zoomed.
'… what...' An owlish look crossed Chell's face.
And with that, the sound of a slightly out-of-tune harmonica came over the PA.
'… well played GLaDOS, psychological attacks. Well played.' A person can only take so many passive aggressive remarks. It was time for her test partner to rescue her by flapping his (figurative) gums and being an anchor of sanity. Looking over her shoulder, Chell gave the sphere a pleading look.
"Oh! Um... I will recite uhh... different types of fruit!" Wheatley said, speaking very loudly, and very slowly so as to drown out the tuneless blues music.
"Apples!" Firing portal to get her up to the raised platform, Chell worked under the loud cacophony of the blues music and Wheatley bleating out his fruit list. "Oranges. Bananas." It was like a grocery store/blues fusion.
And it made Chell hungry.
"GRRWAAAARRRL." Her stomach complained.
"Oh, sorry. That's... actually all the fruit I know. Um... Blargl berries?" Wheatley offered, not really up to date on 'things people can eat'.
The made up word still managed to trigger Chell's 'omfg I'm starving' reaction. And it also caused the blues music to hiccup and stop over the PA.
"What?" GLaDOS fairly gawked at him.
"Razzlenanas? Manomelons? And kumber-quats." Wheatley finished his made-up list of fruit. The music was still silent, apparently GLaDOS still trying to figure out just what the hell Wheatley had done. The only sound was a loooong rumble from Chell's stomach, followed by a snigger from Wheatley. That ass...
Once she twisted the emo-beam cube far enough to catch the last lock on the door, she heard the trilling beep of an incoming message from GLaDOS.
"I wasn't aware humans could pull calories out of imaginary food. Besides your strange reaction to made up-fruits, I'd like to know how it is you actually managed to pack on a few pounds while spending time in the Relaxation Vaults." GLaDOS spun a camera to look at Chell closely.
'I...but... WHAAAAAT?' Chell's eye developed a slight twitch.
There was one way to check this over! Firing a portal at the wall, and another at a nearby corner, she stared through the hole in space to look at herself like a mirror.
… well... MAYBE her face was a little bit water bloated, but she had certainly NOT gained weight. And Wheatley certain added a good 15 pounds to her ass... but that was to be expected.
'Why that uppity, manipulative hunk of bolts...' Chell's eye twitch soothed out as she calmed her thoughts. The faster she could get to the next test and find some sort of weakness in the systems... the sooner she could tear this place apart. Storming through the emancipation grill, Chell found herself looking down at Wheatley expectantly, hoping he'd put his two-cents in and perhaps defend her.
Wheatley was indeed looking at Chell, but he didn't say anything until he seemed to realize that the human was staring back at him. Then he stammered, stumbled over words, and finally got out, "Um. You look ah... fine. Very healthy." He sounded completely unconvincing.
'… thank you for lifting my mood, metal ball.' Chell huffed, rolling her eyes.
"Wot? You mad? … I have no clue what you looked like before! And if she says you've … um... gained weight then you've probably gain-uh you've... you know, I think I'm just going to stop right now." Wheatley suddenly interrupted his own babbling, probably saving himself from being punched in the head. Even HE was smart enough to not piss off angry females any more than necessary.
GLaDOS gave a warning as she moved more rubble out of the way, "The testing chamber ahead exceeded the allowable amount of 'fatal testing mechanics and broken components' allowed by protocol. The auto-repair system is now updating that problem with working fatal test mechnicals. Feel free to develop a hobby that isn't destroying this facility. Or murder." The doors remained closed as the sound of panels shifting and rebuilding rumbled inside the room.
Chell paused, looking around in the hall that prelude the test. There were no cameras in sight, so GLaDOS had only a limited way of observing the human. It was convenient and Chell was going to use now to start escaping. She was going to need Wheatley's help though. Starting a pantomime, Chell tried to ask Wheatley to 'summon his control panel' to hack into the system, but the core only stared at her in confusion.
"You want me... to... um- you want another hug?" He offered, confused.
No! Trying again, Chell pointed at the wall where she imagined a panel would be, then pulled Wheatley free of the harness and began a charade of plugging him into a socket that wasn't there.
This time the sphere got it. "OH! Oh-oh, you want me to find an access panel, yes?"
'Yes!' Chell nodded.
"I think I'm getting better at understand you! Aw'right, give me juuuust a minute here." Blue optic rolling around the room, Wheatley searched the room, his center most metal circle around his eye spinning every few moments as he processed a large packet of information. "Bad news. All of the units here are broken. Can't get much more broken then this. Um, bit more bad news, while I'm at it. SHE may... or may not, have destroyed my ability to interact with the systems when she put that subroutine in to stop my talking as well."
Which actually brought up a question. Chell cocked her head at the sphere, wondering exactly what HAD been done to him.
The core understood the gesture this time as well. "I'm not rightly sure what she did. I just remember you getting tossed into the elevator. And then she shut me down. Next thing I know, I'm in a foot of water, watching as you come splashin' over."
Returning to wait by the testing chamber, Chell thought it over, confused. GLaDOS took Wheatley only to install a 'shut-the-hell-up' subroutine and that was it? That didn't seem like a very deadly trap, to give Chell a companion.
"I'll tell you wot. I'll keep an eye out for any of the access panels that come up as we move. If we find a working one, I bet I can hack into the system!" Wheatley gave an excited nod, his metal shell shifting a bit as he did.
Chell only gave a breath of a laugh in amusement and rolled her eyes slightly. His 'hacking' was abyssal at best... but it was really her only option of the matter. Unless she was going to find a hole in the test chambers and squeeze out like a rat.
There was a trill from the intercom system. "Sorry about that. There were just some holes in the test chamber I had to seal up so you didn't squeeze through like a rat." GLaDOS's voice spread over the PA, jolting the human and the sphere in the hall.
Raising one eyebrow in shock, Chell looked down at Wheatley as if to ask, 'Is it just me... or is she somehow psychic?'
Wheatley completely misinterpreted the expression. "I know you are hungry, but lets keep moving!" He tried to cheer her on.
… Chell suddenly wondered why she was even bothering.
The test GLaDOS had prepared was some kind of feat of acrobatics to get through it unharmed, and yet the lab rat did. Finishing her last leap from a shifting platform, Chell landed in front of a small camera that buzzed at her as she gave swift kick to an 'emo cube' and booted it onto the door latch button and opened her exit out. Then she bowed in front of the camera, 'taa-daah'.
"Hooray! We're not dead! Always points for that!" Wheatley gave a sigh of relief.
"Actually, no. No there is not." GLaDOS informed them. "I am keeping score, and so far, it is negative." She reported.
Chell goggled at the camera for a moment.
"The score, as I have recorded right here –very formal- is as following: The Marshmallow is at -16 science points. And the Moron is at -35." The camera buzzed at it focused on them.
...'Marshmallow?' Chell twitched. Her lips moved as she fired off a unrepeatable insult towards the computer system out of a spiteful reflex, but there was no sound. The human had no voice still, as if she had forgotten. Wheatley was more shocked by GLaDOS's insult and simply forgot to speak at all.
This actually seemed to please GLaDOS. "I'm sorry, I seem to have left you on mute. But I suppose it doesn't matter. Anything you say will only cause me to act more vindictive towards you."
Biting down on her lower lip, Chell actually figured that was correct. For as many insults as she wanted to throw out, GLaDOS would probably only make the tests that much more difficult. In this case, being mute was probably the best chance for survival – unless GLaDOS really did intend to keep her alive indefinitely.
CREEPY.
Wait... there was still petty revenge she could have right now against the computer...
Reaching back and unknotting Wheatley from the jumpsuit, Chell faced the nearest camera and promptly cuddled the core against her, rubbing her cheek against him with a sigh.
Wheatley blue optic first narrowed in alarm at the action, but then he followed Chell's gaze up to the camera as it made an angry buzzing noise and zoomed in. THEN the core finally understood.
They were going to piss GLaDOS off with happiness. Kill 'em with kindness, so to speak.
The metal shutters on Wheatley's eye narrowed in glee. Since he was the only one with the voice, he was going to have to be the inciter. And as he had only used a few of his allowed words for this tests (screams of panic as you go flying through the air don't count, apparently). "Victory hug! You're my favorite human ever," His voice suddenly faltered, embarrassed. "I'm glad you did this for me. And I'm sorry." He didn't use all 25 words for a change, finally getting his full sentence across in exactly that many.
Chell's smile became just a little more genuine.
"That's not science! Stop that this instant!" GLaDOS sounded affronted.
So when the human and sphere finally looked up, grinning at the camera, Chell could only imagine the fury burning through GLaDOS's mainframe. Looks like her theory of physical contact was indeed a disgusting concept to GLaDOS. The thought was enough to propel the woman to the next test with glee.
"Hehe! She's got to be frothin' mad at that. And yet we solved the test, so she can't do anything. This is great...," The core chuckled. Then he paused, "... only not so great. Death traps... yeah. Those. Hmm. Well, any boat in a storm or however that goes. Personally, I would think being in a boat in a storm is a poor idea." Wheatley botched the cliché phrase, and then continued to ramble as the elevator moved them to the next test section.
The next test had some sort of plate on the floor, with a heavy panel arm under it for... propulsion? What- was it involving some sort of Aperture Science Catapult?
"That is not a catapult, just so you are aware. That is an Aperture Science Aerial Faith Plate." Again, as if reading her mind, GLaDOS gave her the answer. Chell had a sudden desire to build herself a tin foil hat. Damn mind reading supercomputers.
"Safety precautions and regulations require me to warn you that the Aerial Faith Plate is NOT to to be use for –," Then GLaDOS's voice began to break up, full of static and quite possibly the AI just repeating the word 'blah' under the noise. After a good twenty seconds, GLaDOS cut the message, apparently satisfied she had delivered her mis-information. Chell gave the camera a dull look. Gee, thanks GLaDOS, for being super helpful.
Anyway, time to test this Aerial plate and see what kind of pancake she was going to splatter against the wall into...
Stepping on the plate, the ground under Chell's feet bowed downwards, and with an impact against her longfall boots, catapulted her into the air and across the room. Chell landed directly on the bullseye. No joke, no damage... no danger?
And it was fun!
"Do it again!" Wheatley laughed, his eye whirling around the test chamber.
The rest of the puzzle was a timing guess on when to jump to catch the bouncing block. It wasn't really even a challenge. The next ten minutes found Chell doing backflips, somersaults, and forward rotations through the air from plate to plate. This was amazing!
"Wow! Is this wot flying is like?" Wheatley asked in amazement. The human beamed.
"What are you doing?" GLaDOS asked, sounded irritated.
"Defying gravity!" Wheatley shouted.
Chell didn't answer, instead back stepping a single pace and catching the faith plate while doing a back handspring.
"WEEEE!" Wheatley pretty much squealed. Chell had both her arms in the air as if it were a roller coaster ride.
"Stop this juvenile behavior this instant. Do you know how stupid you two look?" GLaDOS snapped.
It didn't diminish the joy Chell got from this. In fact, hearing GLaDOS irritation only made this all the better!
"Don't make me flood this room with deadly neurotoxin!" GLaDOS warned, or scolded, both sounded similar on the giant computer.
"Oh geez! Quick, stop! Don't tempt the computer lady!" Wheatley was alarmed.
Was it just a bluff? Would she really bring out the neurotoxin during testing? Chell stopped her acrobatics, landing in front of the door suspiciously. Off-hand, Chell even wondered if there was such a thing as non-deadly neurotoxin...
"Finally, I didn't think you were even listening to me." GLaDOS sighed, the cameras focusing on Chell.
'I was trying not to.' Chell was tuning out GLaDOS again. She turned and fired the ASHPD at the far wall of the test chamber, the portal spinning open and tearing the open-feed camera off the wall with a 'thunk'.
"Vital testing apparatus destroyed." The auto-system reported.
"..." GLaDOS's intercom made the soft double trill signaling she had opened the PA system, but she said nothing. There was a few seconds of silence and then the Disc Operating system spoke, "I really can't believe you can be that petty."
Petty was it? Time for yet another victory hug. Wheatley once again was removed from the harness of the jumpsuit and in her glee, Chell found herself grinning more than normal at victory as she hugged the little core. If only to let GLaDOS enjoy the bitter taste of defeat as Chell figured out each of these tests.
"Yes. I see you two. And no. I don't care. Your behavior is quite disturbing." GLaDOS remarked in a deadpan voice.
When arriving at the new test, the AI seemed cranky and frustrated. "Lets see what the next test is. Oh. Advanced Aerial Faith Plates. Your favorite."
Chell paused. With all the venting of steam and fun she had been having on the last faith plate test, she honestly assumed GLaDOS to remove anything even remotely enjoyable. And replace them with cactus or something.
"Well, don't enjoy yourself too much. I wouldn't want my valuable ~Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device~ to get damaged." The AI system had another hiccup, sounding like it had replaced the words 'ASHPD' in after originally deciding to go with a different phrase. "I'm going to be getting the systems back online after being dead for the past – oh... oh that is very interesting." GLaDOS suddenly cut herself off.
The human could not help it. She was instantly curious. The camera at the wall had her full attention.
"Oh, nothing. The automated calender has come back online. It's amazing how the time passes, when you are having ~cake~." GLaDOS subbed another word in, where possibly the word 'fun' should have been.
'Geez... why was it everything GLaDOS says turns into a mind game?' Chell sighed.
More panel arms swung out of the woman's way, exposing a wide open room filled with caustic acid... and faith plates. Was it really as simple as it looked? Chell's gaze moved down the room from plate to plate. Assuming GLaDOS hadn't calibrated them to fall just short of the next plate, the path was basic and clear.
So this mean Chell had to trust that GLaDOS wasn't try to kill her.
Perhaps the word 'crap' was necessary to insert here, somewhere. Chell now understood why they were called 'faith plates'. Because it required the test subject to put full faith in the crazy computer to not murder them.
'I'm screwed.' Chell's head hung.
"Put me on the plate." Wheatley said simply.
Chell looked at him as if he had just asked he had just asked to be incinerated.
"Put me on it! I'll test to see if it makes it all the way to the end!" Wheatley insisted.
'No!~ Nononono.' Shaking her head furiously, ponytail whipping about, Chell sudden found herself twisting around, both arms pulled Wheatley free as if he were going to escape from the harness and throw himself onto the faithplate. And the ASHPD (so very important to survive) was dropped on the ground and forgotten. She couldn't – WOULDN'T – do such a thing. Even if he was telling her to kill him... Chell wanted to be selfish and keep Wheatley talking if only for her sanity if not for his own safety too.
No! They would go together! And that was final. Chell gave him a look that allowed for no arguments. And with only 2 words left of his 25, Wheatley couldn't argue anyway. The little core only bobbed in his shell, nodding in agreement, but looking morose.
Gathering up the ASHPD and Chell carefully eyeballed the path of the faith plate. Lining up the portals to angled panels on the wall to redirect the path to the exit (assuming the faith plates wouldn't dump them into the corrosive water below), Chell stood above the faith plate calmly. Wheatley was tucked under one arm against her hip, ASHPD back in her right hand, and a look of determination on her face. The core gave her what appeared to be a sightly brighter look, probably for reassurance.
Taking one large breath to fill her lungs, Chell stepped forward onto the plate and was sent soaring.
From plate to plate, each jump bounced her along the course as intended so far. Into the blue portal, out the orange portal and – amazingly- she landed EXACTLY where intended! Safe (if you can consider 'still in testing' to be 'safe') and on the platform at the far end of the room.
"If you were not such a ~valued testing subject~," GLaDOS began to speak, replacing a word in her last sentence (and if Chell had to guess, she had replaced, 'murderous bastard'), "I could have adjusted the faith plates to fall short of the intended target. Curse my desire for science... over murder." She muttered.
"Murder science." Wheatley said, apparently trying to keep GLaDOS's unknown ire at him down and using his last 2 words of the test.
'Not helping, Wheatley!' Chell found she had squashed Wheatley against her stomach while she was airborn. Probably just as well, because the core would have been shrieking the whole time they were bouncing around if he had seen any of it. GLaDOS had missed a perfectly good chance to kill Chell (and ruin the ASHPD in acid as well as Wheatley). Maybe the AI was reluctant to destroy valuable Aperture property. Out of the three things, GLaDOS obviously favored the ASHPD most... and held Chell and Wheatley in equal contempt.
The giant 'Aperture' logo on Chell's chest probably wasn't enough to convince the computer that she too was Aper-… 'You know what, ending that line of thought, just right there.' Chell shook her head furiously. 'Being in testing is bad enough. BELONGING to Aperture... yeah, I think I'd swan dive into that acid pit.' The human winced.
Finishing the test with only changing her portal once, Wheatley tucked under her arm the rest of the time, Chell gave a victory leap when the door opened. And pulling Wheatley up, she leaned her forehead against the cool metal in a 'victory glee!' moment.
A camera nearby swung around to stare at the test subjects. Chell looked up at the camera, wondering just what GLaDOS had to say now. "It's healthy for you to have other friends. To look for qualities in other people that I obviously lack." GLaDOS said, strangely gentle.
Chell braced for the biting comment she knew was going to follow.
"Such as idiocy. It's nice to see you found someone else with levels of idiocy near your own. I'm... I'm so proud of you." GLaDOS gave a watery sounding warble.
Wheatley suddenly was glaring furiously, wanting to yell or try an insult back, but unable to say anything until the test was finished and his word count reset. It seemed more of an insult to Wheatley than to Chell, but she felt the barbs as well, cutting words and sharp wit slicing ego and psyche alike.
Exiting the test chamber, Wheatley was still muttering when he had his vocal unit brought back online, "-the nerve! I can't believe she—oh, my voice is back." He paused. Then he cast an apologetic blue eye on Chell. "If that's what you had to go through... I'm amazed with your human perseverance that you didn't explode. I honestly thought I was going to blow up in there. Physically! Blow up!"
"If you do that, 50 science points will be award to Team Imbecile." GLaDOS bribed.
"Shut up!" Wheatley growled.
"+1000 science points if you can get the Marshmallow to blow up as well." GLaDOS continued to bribe.
"Wot the- that's not even possible! I spent forever looking after the humans and none of them ever blew up." Wheatley was scowling.
"Then you obviously weren't doing it right." GLaDOS said, matter-of-factly.
There was only SO MUCH pissy computer and defensive brit-bot that one human could take. And she had enough. Tucking Wheatley under her arm and giving him a rather weak smile as if to say 'Come on, you're better than that, don't argue.' , she rushed herself to the elevator and entered it, sighing as the doors began to close.
"See you at the next test – Chell." GLaDOS's voice was absolutely furious.
And if blood could function at freezing temperatures, Chell was positive all hers had just frozen in her veins. She felt like she was back in cryo again.
That was the first time GLaDOS had ever said her name... and it did NOT bode well.
