Chapter 4
Phillip Lamar Davis spent the first half of his fifty something years shuttling around America's southern states before making the vast leap in distance and culture to New York City. After a brief, tumultuous period of homelessness compounded by a nasty drug habit, Phillip used his experience as a businessman and a tailor to open and maintain a shop in what had to be the dankest corner of Brooklyn. Phil's Big and Tall was immediately considered a brilliant diamond in the rough that saw a large number of individuals hopping boroughs to get their fashion needs tended to. The shop even had a few famous clients, which led to periodic closures when they were in town.
Among the regulars chatting it up with Phillip about the state of modern men's clothing was Luigi, who was a little less fashionable than the plunger that he used on a daily basis. As Luigi wasn't sitting on the mounds of cash that the others flaunted regularly, he would make his contribution to the shop through the purchase of far too many ties and the occasional green shirt. The ties went straight into a drawer, as Luigi had nothing to wear said items with. The shirts went on under his overalls, which became his trusty "green and blues." Phillips noticed it all and called Luigi out over what he was doing with all the product that he was buying. Luigi told the truth about his situation and was met with a hearty laugh from the tailor. Upon revealing that the small fleet of ties was worth two suits, Phillip expressed his desire to make something for Luigi on the cheap. Elated, Luigi went back home and cleared out his closet to make room for his upcoming "baby." Unfortunately, the dark green suit that was going to be his little one never got to take shape due to Phillip being thrown in prison for tax evasion and a multitude of other charges.
After the first victory over the once fearsome king of Koopas, Luigi's clothing was plastered to his body via a thick layer of blood, sweat and grime. He begged the castle tailors for a nice outfit, but they were wholly incapable of making anything other than toad-sized vests. Peach's seamstress had better luck making clothing suitable for human beings, but her output looked far too much like an evening gown for Luigi's liking. He eventually abandoned the search and visited the rogue magikoopa that had been making copies of his brother's clothing for a fee. Luigi ponied up the cash and the mage conjured up an entire wardrobe worth of green and blues that were only worn after a massive sigh of boredom from his inner fashionista. The apathy continued until Luigi opened the closet of his new dwelling in Muraiya City and discovered a dark green suit and dress pants seemingly plucked out of the hands of the incarcerated Phillip.
"Is there something wrong, Luigi. You seemed to have gone pale," said Mayor Persimmon, who had been uncomfortably close to the man since he agreed to be her associate.
"This suit, Mayor Persimmon. How did you know?" asked Luigi after a bit of a stammer.
"It is my job to do so," responded the mayor.
"I might have told a few people the story. But even then, I didn't describe the suit."
"Because there was no suit to describe. I know.".
"Those I told the story to worked at Peach castle as of last week. No way they are here."
"You are correct. That said, you are very much wrong in thinking that your time with a tailor turned inmate wasn't going to make the rounds. People like to talk. People love to talk about you, Luigi."
Luigi closed the closet, making a silent vow to admire the outfit when he had some time alone.
"On the subject of talking, when are you going to allow me to mingle with the masses?" asked Luigi, trying to repress years of shying away from the general public.
Mayor Persimmon smiled. "Tomorrow evening there will be a ceremony officially welcoming you to Muraiya. At that ceremony, you will be tasked with delivering a short introductory speech to the people. After said speech, you will be free to wander."
"Anything in particular you want in this speech besides verifying that I am who I am?" asked an unenthusiastic Luigi.
"Just be positive. Bonus points if you make me look good."
After Mayor Persimmon took her leave, Luigi made a bee-line for the television that sat in the corner of the living room. Desperate to find some unfiltered information about his place of residence, he flipped through a nice variety of channels and found nothing remotely interesting. It was only on Luigi's second rotation of the channels did he find a variety show hosted by a smiling sumo brother in a suit that, quite miraculously, fit him very well. As the show came back from break, the crowd cheered loudly.
"Welcome back to Gala Grande with yours truly, Don Papisumo!"
The crowd fell silent, as if on cue.
"Seems like we have a special guest in the studio today. Don't we, Mamisuma?
The camera cut to a microphone-holding sumo sister in a long, flowing dress.
"Hailing from a filthy puddle somewhere in the slums of Diamond City is the Mayor of Muraiya herself: Persimmon!"
A female goomba waddled out wearing an oversized crown with a patch on it. Luigi was surprised at the jeering of the crowd.
"The first thing I want you uneducated masses to do is shut your mouths!" shouted the false Persimmon in the snootiest of accents. "The second thing that I must say before we carry on with whatever you have me here to do is to refer to me as your queen, as that is what I am."
The crowd gave her another loud round of boos. One brave individual even threw a paper cup in her direction.
"If you are to deliver a beverage to the queen, then please have it be the finest wine poured into imported glass and served with the most exquisite cheeses," said the queen.
"Miss Mayor-Princess-Queen Persimmon! What can you tell us about the Luigi sighting? Is he truly among us as we speak?" asked Don Papisumo.
"He may or may not be in Muraiya, though his possible appearance in this glorious kingdom that I constructed with my bare hands is more than likely able to be validated through future discernment," babbled the queen, trying her best not to break character.
Don Papisumo overplayed looking thoroughly confused. 'So, is that a yes?" he asked.
"The likeliness of a coherent response depends solely on the results of the coming referendum, which will no doubt swing in my favor as I am queen and you, my peons, realize that."
While the program wasn't the serious news broadcast that Luigi was looking for, he felt that he got a good grasp of how at least a percentage of the locals viewed Mayor Persimmon. They saw her as full of herself on top of being unnecessarily wordy. As the show continued to lampoon the very soul out Mayor Persimmon, the only thing that stayed consistent with what Luigi had been experiencing since he touched down in Muraiya was that the people loved him. With that in mind, Luigi pulled out a notepad that was part of his welcome package and started working on his speech. The results were a bit generic, but there was only so much that he was willing to do for the woman who took him out of his admittedly boring situation by force.
The next morning, Luigi was wide awake and admiring the perfect fit of his suit when his door was assaulted by a heavy handed individual. Luigi exited the bedroom and approached the source of the noise.
"Who is it?" asked Luigi.
"Persimmon," replied a familiar voice.
Luigi opened the door and Mayor Persimmon indeed was standing in the hallway.
"You look absolutely stunning in that suit," said the mayor with widening eyes.
"I would be lying if I didn't say that I felt like a new man."
"Because you are, Luigi. A new man with a new role in his new home. Did you finish your speech?"
"I did."
"Then I'll just hold on to the backup speech that I prepared just in case."
"You didn't trust me?"
"Luigi, I'm used to dealing with snakes at the worst and idiots at the very best."
"I see."
"Moving on, your day is going to start out in an hour with breakfast at the Concourse, a restaurant near the venue in which the festivities of the day will happen. Afterwards, you will be taken to Koby Stadium, the aforementioned venue, for a walkthrough of the ceremony. You will be then taken to a room where you will stay until the event happens at six o'clock."
"You really don't want me to stretch my legs," said Luigi with a slight chuckle.
"This event is very important to me," said a serious Mayor Persimmon.
"I assume this is due to the referendum."
Mayor Persimmon scoffed. "Luigi, I'm going to have a newspaper delivered to your door every morning. I refuse to allow old episodes of Gala Grande to be your only source of information about Muraiyan politics."
Breakfast at the Concourse restaurant was more awkward than it had any business being due to Persimmon barking orders at the already nervous staffers. Arms were trembling and knees were going weak, which resulted in a lovely heap of French toast and a carafe of orange juice falling into Luigi's lap. Persimmon exploded and, just before heads were to roll, the plumber stepped in and calmed the mayor down for the good of everyone involved. After the near breakdown at restaurant, its manager approached Luigi to welcome him to Muraiya and asked if he ever considered a career in politics. The only politician in the building answered for Luigi and whisked him back to their waiting limousine.
"Luigi, I don't mean to step on your toes, but you are to leave all talk of politics to me," said an obviously irritated Mayor Persimmon.
"I'd understand that more if I actually said something political," responded Luigi.
The mayor took a deep breath and nodded.
"Koby Stadium is just a five-minute drive from our current location. In fact, if you look in that direction, you will see it come into view," said Mayor Persimmon, dropping her previous statement completely.
Luigi looked out the window and saw the large stadium a short distance away. He wasn't overly impressed by what he initially saw, but concluded that the inactive lights and screens that were all over the stadium would make for an impressive sight at night.
"It's a baseball stadium, right?"
"Primarily, but it has holds everything from racing to professional wrestling."
"Wrestling?"
"There is a sizable percentage of the population that can't get enough of it."
As the limousine pulled into the stadium's lot, Luigi noticed a line of individuals wrapping around the front gate.
"Is there a post-holiday sale that I am missing out on?" asked Luigi, jokingly.
"They are here for you," responded Mayor Persimmon, dryly.
'Any way we can pull up beside them?"
"Why?"
"I want to greet them."
"That is what the speech is for."
"If I recognize at least some of the citizens personally, then I am less of a figurehead and more of a normal person."
"No," responded Mayor Persimmon without the briefest pause to consider Luigi's words.
The rehearsal of the ceremony was a complete and utter mess from the moment that the mayor and Luigi were dropped off at the stadium's back entrance. Contrary to what was believed about just how ready the venue was for the event, everything was at a state of atrophy. The lighting rig was rusted and the sound system was producing an oppressive amount of static. Add in an incredibly stubborn group of hardly-working workers and Mayor Persimmon was driven to her wits end. She unleashed an absolutely legendary stream of profanities, insults, and threats that got everyone and everything ready for show time a few minutes before it was supposed to happen. Energetic jazz music filled the air as the all-encompassing mass of goombas, koopas, toads, and a handful of humans entered the stadium.
From the entrance of a hall that led directly to the field, Mayor Persimmon and Luigi looked at the miraculously reconstructed stage. On it was a microphone-equipped podium that was flanked on both sides by enormous monitors providing everyone in the stadium with a good view of the action.
"Luigi, we didn't get the slightest bit of rehearsal time, but I am sure that one of your stature doesn't particularly need practice in the first place when the deed to be done is nothing more than a speech," said Mayor Persimmon with the smallest hint of nervousness in her voice.
"Are we both heading out at the same time?" asked Luigi.
"No. I will address the audience first and give you a cue. The rest I will leave in your very capable hands. Get it?"
"I got it."
"Good. Now if you'd excuse me, I have an impatient crowd to deal with," said the mayor as she walked out of the hall.
The capacity crowd murmured apathetically when Mayor Persimmon took the stage Entirely unfazed by the tepid reaction from her constituents, she started to speak.
"Citizens of Muraiya, you have been gathered here today to witness what was thought to be an impossible union between our community of refugees and an incredible human being. A compassionate man who has been at the forefront of multiple extractions of ungrateful royalty from a savage king and asking absolutely nothing in exchange but respect. After many depressing years quite literally underground, this fine individual was brought to our home, and it is up to us to open the door for him. Please welcome to Muraiya the true hero of the Mushroom Kingdom: Luigi Segale!"
The crowd erupted and Luigi made his way to the stage not thinking about his speech, but how Mayor Persimmon got a hold of his last name.
"Good luck out there," said the mayor on her way back to the hall.
Luigi nodded, not hearing much of anything that came out of her mouth due to the volume of the crowd. The roar from the audience rose to ear-splitting levels as the man of the hour reached the podium.
. . .
"I was told that you wanted to speak to me in private."
"Correct."
"Here I am. Out with it."
"Princess, I haven't seen my brother in two days."
"And I haven't seen him in around two months. So, what?"
"Well, I was wondering if you sent him out on a mission, but I guess I was just given the answer."
"Why would I have him do anything for me?"
"How many times has he helped me fight for your kingdom?"
"Lately?"
"I know where you are going and I'm stopping you there."
"Luigi is a grown man, Mario. If he wants to up and leave for two days, two years, or for the rest of his life, then it is entirely his prerogative to do so."
Author's Note: I don't even have any excuses for how long this chapter took me to write…
