A/N: So it's been since July and I'm sorry for taking so long... My bad.

I was a part of a big bang, but then that sort of fell apart, but I did beta a great IwaOi fic, "dim a little, shine a lot," by SatyrSyd37. It's about Oikawa and his work with SETI trying to find aliens, and his former best friend who he meets up with again after five years and who's now a tattoo artist, Iwaizumi. It's such a good fic. Please check it out on Ao3!

And thanks hobbit_hedgehog on Ao3 for the beta! Good comments! yes


It didn't take long for Iwaizumi to regret bringing Oikawa with him to the shop. He immediately ate one of the first flowers he saw, and he had not understood when Iwaizumi had turned to explain that not every plant was necessarily deemed edible, by human standards. Oikawa proceeded to spit up the carnation into the palm of his hands. Iwaizumi pointed him toward the trash. Oikawa had exclaimed something about what a waste that would be, and promptly swallowed the flower again, slurping it out of his own hand.

What really cemented Iwaizumi's embarrassment was turning around to see Hanamaki sniggering from behind the counter. Iwaizumi raised a threatening pointer finger toward his friend and coworker, but when Oikawa stood next to him, beaming a brilliantly white smile, the unspoken threat carried no real weight.

"Introduce me to your friend, Hajime," said Hanamaki, that Cheshire grin not leaving his face.

Iwaizumi stiffened before speaking. "This is Tooru Oikawa, and—"

"Hello, friend of Iwa-chan!" Oikawa bounded forward with an inhuman vigor. "I am overjoyed at acquainting myself with you!" He gripped Hanamaki's hands in his own over the table and held them there, still beaming.

"It's a pleasure," said Hanamaki to Oikawa. He leaned to the side, looking around Oikawa to Iwaizumi. "He's a lively one."

Iwaizumi just sighed in response as he crossed behind the counter, taking his apron from the hook on the wall as he went. Oikawa was still holding onto Hanamaki's hands.

"Your body temperature seems to be normal, although your stature is above average," said Oikawa, sizing Hanamaki up. "You could use some more physical activity, however—Iwaizumi seems to have a better physical form, although you have more genetic potential…"

Iwaizumi reached across the counter and pulled Oikawa's hands off of Hanamaki's. "Oikawa? Not everyone needs a physical assessment."

Oikawa eyed Hanamaki up and down, who was still trying to figure out whether he should be offended or not by Oikawa's comments on his physical structure. "All I was saying was—"

"It's okay," said Hanamaki. He grinned devilishly at Iwaizumi. "After all, your friend here is spreading rumors, you know?"

"I do not," said Oikawa as Iwaizumi let his hands fall from his grasp.

"He told me," said Hanamaki, leaning forward over the counter, "that you're an alien. A spaceman. How cruel is that?"

Iwaizumi rolled his eyes at this schoolyard display, and Oikawa just blinked a few times in response. Hanamaki snickered until he realized that Iwaizumi wasn't embarrassed and he wasn't getting a rise out of Oikawa. "What?"

"Your information is correct. Oe ketuwong." Oikawa had a straight face even as his mouth formed the inhuman words.

Hanamaki looked to Iwaizumi in shock and back to Oikawa. He stepped toward Iwaizumi and spoke to him in a hushed voice. "Are you sure this guy shouldn't be… seeing someone? For delusions? Or should we really…?"

"Oikawa, can you do that thing you were doing the other day that I told you not to do in public," said Iwaizumi, bending around Hanamaki to speak to the alien on the other side of the counter.

"But we are in public," said Oikawa, gesturing to the otherwise empty flower shop around him. "And also, which thing that you told to not do?"

"It's okay," said Iwaizumi. "And, the tongue thing."

Oikawa nodded, and he faced Hanamaki, who gave a nervous look to Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi nodded to Oikawa, directing Hanamaki's attention that way. Hanamaki looked at the alien, who allowed his tongue to drop from his tongue, descending a full three feet at least before lifting up and meekly waving at Hanamaki.

"What the shit?"

There was slightly less teasing after that, and Iwaizumi had to admit to himself that he did love the expression on Hanamaki's face when Oikawa's tongue got a little past two feet and kept going. Iwaizumi got to work after instructing Oikawa not to touch or eat anything, but the whole time, Hanamaki kept looking askance at Oikawa.


"No," Iwaizumi said flatly as Oikawa poked at the birdcage they kept near the window with a few parakeets.

"But, I—"

"No," said Iwaizumi, more firmly this time. Oikawa skulked over to inspect a display of lilies.

"I didn't realize that aliens pouted," said Hanamaki absently.

"That's what I thought, too," said Iwaizumi, turning back to the arrangement he was working on. Hanamaki kept his eyes on the alien, who in turn seemed to be in a staring contest with a flower.

Iwaizumi was just putting the final touches on his arrangement when the bells on the door jingled, and someone entered, shivering away the cold as they stepped inside. She was a tall, dark-haired woman with glasses, and she was drop-dead gorgeous. She shook herself and briefly looked around before approaching the counter.

"Hello," she said, her voice quiet but powerful. "I was just here to pick up an arrangement. It should be under Shimizu."

"Of course," said Iwaizumi. He turned to the cooler to retrieve the bouquet of bright oranges and yellows—all sunflowers and chrysanthemums and a few pink cosmoses, as well. It seemed a bit more gregarious than would fit this woman's style, but Iwaizumi reasoned that most people don't usually buy flowers for themselves. It was probably a gift.

He almost dropped the bright arrangement as he turned around, because Oikawa had switched interest from the lilies he had been observing to this beautiful customer, and he was currently holding both of her hands in his, as he had done with Hanamaki.

The main difference was, Hanamaki was a friend, who Iwaizumi was fine with freaking out. This "Shimizu" was a complete stranger.

"…and you are a fascinating individual, with an interesting use of tools to make up for your genetic sight impurities. Everything else seems to be perfect, though do you want to see something not even a human as well-formed as you can do? Iwa-chan told me not to, but then let me do it earlier, so…"

He opened his mouth and began to stick out his tongue when Iwaizumi leapt forward and practically slammed the bouquet on the counter, shaking loose a few petals but catching both of their attentions. "Excuse him," said Iwaizumi, "he's…"

Oikawa beamed, releasing Shimizu's hands—which she immediately pulled back from him—and Iwaizumi found himself completely unable to come up with a convincing enough lie to cover up his alien's odd behavior. He was at a loss.

"He's trying out a new character bit for our improve theatre troupe," said Hanamaki from behind Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi turned back to him in shock. "Improv is only twenty percent on the spot, you know. Most of it is well-rehearsed."

Iwaizumi turned back to the customer with a weak smile that he was sure seemed guilty. The smile was not returned. The woman roughly handed him some bills, and Iwaizumi had barely handed her the change before she bustled back out into the cold.

"Your alien beefed it with the hot girl," said Hanamaki. "And I can't believe I saved you like that."

Iwaizumi didn't respond to Hanamaki, choosing instead to focus his anger on its real target.

"Oikawa, you can't…" He trailed off, both keenly aware that Hanamaki was watching everything he was doing with a smug look on his face and that as soon as the awkward had shifted to someone else, Hanamaki seemed completely fine with the idea of an actual space alien. "You need to be a little more... well, act natural."

Oikawa's face shriveled up in annoyance. "I am not unintelligent," he said, "so there is no reason to speak to me as if I am. But also know that, being from separate planets, we both have a different metric for 'normal.'"

"Oh, shit, yeah," said Iwaizumi. Oikawa didn't know what normal was, which meant that everything had to be completely explained. "Don't grab both hands. Just one. Shake, then release. And… don't tell people you're an alien."

"Why?" asked Oikawa.

"They'll think you're crazy," said Iwaizumi.

"I do," said Hanamaki from a little further off.

"Thanks," said Iwaizumi, not turning to him, "you're not helpful at all." He focused back on Oikawa. Sometimes, when he wasn't saying anything weird or showing off the shapeshifting abilities of his prehensile tongue, Iwaizumi could almost just see him as another guy. He seemed to fit in with the eclectic but dreamy backdrop of the flower shop.

"You know what?" said Iwaizumi. "I would probably be best if you don't talk to anybody else unless they say hello to you." He paused. "And when they do, just a greeting."

Oikawa nodded. "But I will have further opportunities to meet other humans, I presume?"

"Of course," said Iwaizumi, feeling a slight throb in his forehead, the onset of a headache. "And you always have Hanamaki over here. I'm not sure if we'll count him as people."

"Hey!"

"But think about it this way, Oikawa—you should be an observer, not a participant, in the world." He realized that this sounded pretty harsh, so he held up his hands. "That is, at least until you start to figure it out a little more."

Oikawa nodded, pleased enough with this, at least for now. Now, both Iwaizumi and Hanamaki kept an eye on him, but despite their worry, Oikawa didn't scare away any other customers, didn't do anything to increase the intensity to the low throbbing behind Iwaizumi's eyes, and only ate three other flowers—that they could tell were missing at the end of the day.


"Here," said Iwaizumi, handing Oikawa the bowl of salad at his kitchen table. "These are plants you can eat, since you've been so keen on it."

Oikawa eyed the bowl and reached for it with both hands. Iwaizumi raised his eyebrows, and Oikawa froze.

"Use the utensils."

Oikawa pouted, but he pulled his hands back from almost-grabbing the lettuce and used the large fork and spoon to move the food from the bowl to his plate. There, he reached for it with a hand before stopping and picking up the fork Iwaizumi had put out for him. He gave Iwaizumi the stink eye as he stuffed a large mouthful of salad into his mouth. Iwaizumi wasn't sure if he was dealing with an alien or a petulant toddler.

"What," began Oikawa before he had finished eating the food in his mouth, "separates the food humans deem edible from the food humans designate as 'flowers'?"

"Taste is a big part of it," said Iwaizumi. "And we do eat some flowers. Like artichokes."

"What is the purpose of your flowers, then, if humans do not eat them?"

Iwaizumi put down his fork and looked across the table at the alien. He wasn't sure if Oikawa was messing with him or not. He wasn't sure if he had the capacity of knowledge about earth to actually mess with him. He definitely had the capacity for sass

Oikawa just blinked and scarfed down another mouthful of greens while waiting for Iwaizumi's response.

"I suppose…" said Iwaizumi, "I suppose that it's not for any purpose at all other than aesthetics." He paused, unsure if that was a word Oikawa would understand, though whatever sort of translation went on inside of the alien's head. "Basically, humans like to have flowers around because they're pretty."

"Oh!" said Oikawa, understanding flashing across his eyes. "Just like your musculature! You keep up with your physique, but you do not use it for anything!" He beamed, apparently pleased with himself for understanding the concept.

Iwaizumi flushed. He opened his mouth to reply, and though all that could go through his head was that Oikawa had taken a look at his body analytically and declared it pretty. He pushed his mixed embarrassment and flattery to the back of his mind.

"Iwa-chan," said Oikawa, reaching out a hand and placing it next to Iwaizumi's on the table, but not quite touching, "I want you to know that I am very appreciative that you brought me with you today." He looked down at the salad, began to take another stab of lettuce and vegetables, but then seemed to remember that he was in the middle of speaking, and paused. "I want to learn as much as I can about Earth—it's the reason I came here. And I am so glad that you are willing to help me with my mission."

Iwaizumi cocked his head to the side ever-so-slightly, a little confused. He knew that Oikawa didn't exactly see things the same way a human would see the, but he really thought he hadn't done too much for the alien. Though, Oikawa was grateful for what help he'd provided. Iwaizumi lifted his hand and patted the top of Oikawa's briefly and smiled. "I was happy to help," he said. His grin twisted upward. "Plus, you really freaked Hanamaki out for a minute. I know you didn't mean to, but it was very satisfying."

"He is your friend?" Oikawa seemed genuinely confused. "Why would you wish him ire?"

"Oh," said Iwaizumi, waving the question away. "Of course Hanamaki's my friend. But he's sort of annoying sometimes, and he thinks he's better than you." He paused. "Well, not just you. Sort of, everyone. But it's nice every once and a while to joke around with him. Shake him up."

Oikawa looked at Iwaizumi, his mouth just slightly open, his eyes slightly unfocused as he calculated what Iwaizumi had just told him. "I see," he said, using his fork to stab most of what was left on his plate. "There is a certain fondness for teasing." He put the food in his mouth and started to chew. "I find that amusing."

Iwaizumi's grin faltered just a touch. "I think I'd wait to adopt that particular trait until you better understand the nuances of the Earth culture."

Oikawa swallowed and looked to Iwaizumi, his grin downright devilish. "Oh, Iwa-chan…" he said, sighing wistfully. "I think you and I both know that I will be employing this policy of teasing as quickly and as fully as possible."

"I cannot wait," said Iwaizumi, wondering if it was a coincidence that his headache decided to make a comeback at the same time Oikawa had made a comment about teasing. He took a sip of water. The one part of Hanamaki he didn't want to rub off of Oikawa seemed to have made the biggest impression. There could have been worse outcomes, but Iwaizumi found that he had created himself a new type of gentle suffering.

"I agree with you," said Oikawa, reaching for the large bowl of salad in the middle of the table and helping himself to some more. "This arrangement is much tastier than the arrangement you were creating at the flower shop."

"Again, those weren't meant to be eaten."

"But they can be," said Oikawa. "And I am still not convinced that humans' obsession with the look of things is not wasteful."

"It's worth—" Iwaizumi broke off. There wasn't an easy way to explain exactly what it was worth, but he knew that there was a reason humans liked nice things. There was a reason why they continued to work to create things that were beautiful, or cultivate them into things such as the flowers at the shop. Whether or not they had actual purpose, they were full of worth just because o what they were.

While this was what he thought about, he instead shrugged and said "—at least a little to the people who spend their money on it." He narrowed his eyes slightly. "And Oikawa?" he said, suddenly remembering what he had read in a horticultural periodical recently about pets and plants. "Don't eat any of the houseplants. It'll make you sick."


As Iwaizumi laid in bed, his head swam with visions of Oikawa that day. It was his first major outing, and he'd done well, for the most aprt. He had eaten a few flowers, but Iwaizumi had ruined a fair share of flowers when he had first started at the shop, and this was… well, it wasn't similar at all, but there wasn't really any harm in it. And there weren't many equitable experiences to what it was like on the first "bring your alien to work day."

He had done well with Hanamaki—though Iwaizumi would have to keep a strict eye that no more of Hanamaki's dry sarcasm rubbed off on Oikawa, who was already enough of a little shit without Hanamaki's influence.

He found himself glad, though, that it had gone well. Maybe it was because Oikawa had enjoyed it much more than staying all cooped up at Iwaizumi's house, and maybe it was that he'd loved the look on Hanamaki's face when he found out Oikawa's true identity as an alien. And maybe—this maybe was a long shot—he was happy because after this successful outing, he knew that Oikwawa would be able to fit into the Earth world. Or, at least, he wouldn't stand out too much. He had the base skills—the details, they'd still have t work on.

But if he could work with everyday Earth life, that meant that he would stay. Despite himself, that was something Iwaizumi found novel. He'd been living with Oikawa for a week, and despite the nuisance, despite the misunderstandings, despite the mess, he found himself growing increasingly fond of his alien; it was refreshing to see things through a fresh set of eyes. Maybe those eyes just needed to come from light-years away in order for Iwaizumi to find them.

He'd been nursing something of a headache all day, but as he settled into bed, he could only feel that dull afterache, the feeling of the pain on its way out.


A/N: When Oikawa says "Oe ketuwong," that means "I'm an alien."

hobbit_hedgehog, upon betaing this fic: "Iwaizumi comes home one day and sees Oikawa with a leaf sticking out of his mouth. He goes to get it back and has to chase Oikawa around the house."

tru