Disclaimer: Please see first chapter for disclaimer.

Rating: T

A/N: Hey y'all! Sorry it's been a while, but it's here now, lol. Thanks for all the reviews and response to the last chapter. I wasn't completely happy with it and I had some trouble with parts of this. I was really looking forward to this book and some of it has been totally fun, but it's continuing to be a pain with some parts, lol. But hopefully this will suffice. I'm bound and determined to make the next one SNAZZYJAZZY! : )

Just a quick note. I have tried to keep Jesse's experience in the Shadowland as simple as possible. I don't want to offend anyone with what it might be like. We all have our different views on Heaven/Re-incarnation etc. So I hope it doesn't upset anyone. This is just my view of it : )

I hope you enjoy :D

Recap: Jesse enjoys a calm day reading in Susannah's room. Until someone takes fate into their own hands, ripping him from Suze forever...


Chapter 4...

Susannah woke early the next morning still looking tired and rumpled, but minus the heavy weight she seemed to have been carrying around the last couple of days. Now I knew the reason why I could understand. I had tried furtively to not laugh too loud reading my book whilst I was waiting for her to wake. Having to put my hand over my mouth in a fruitless endeavour to be quiet. Finding the book it to be highly entertaining and a effective way of relieving me of my thoughts. Thankfully I hadn't woken Susannah from her much needed sleep.

I quickly excused myself from Susannah's room so she could have her privacy once she was alert enough to move from her bed. I left Spike where he was, still sleeping on the day bed. Curled into a tight orange ball softly purring is his sleep induced haze. His tail and ears twitching every so often like someone was tickling his sensitive fur.

I waited in Susannah's family room looking to the bookshelves for another book. I had made quick work of my current one and wanted something else to occupy my mind. I decided to stay in Susannah's room for the day, should Maria decide to make an appearance. Even though Susannah wouldn't be there I knew there were other ways Maria could have her revenge. I wasn't prepared to leave her house at least slightly un-guarded.

Susannah would be at work all day easing my concern at Maria showing up to her there. I knew Susannah could handle herself fine. And I also knew Maria wouldn't do anything to draw attention to herself. I just hoped and prayed, Diego didn't decide to make a show either. As strong as Susannah is, I knew she wouldn't be a match for him. His strength far surpassing her own.

I shook off the the pensive feelings and concerns that seemed to be a constant around me and returned my attention back to my book search. I had meant to ask Susannah to speak with Father Dominic and see if there was any reading material he could recommend for me. I didn't think it would be appropriate for me to go and speak to him myself. Not while he is at school. I had run out of Susannah's school books and her mothers reading material wasn't the kind of category I wished to read. Her stepfather had a couple I have read but he didn't seem to have many others.

David was the only other person in the house with a bountiful supply. Ranging from different subjects and matter. Most being thick, complicated texts but were a pleasure to try and read. It still surprises me that at his age he can fully understand them. They have often made me wonder and question some of what is written. I would have enjoyed speaking to him about them, but I didn't think he would find my sudden presence very welcoming. I knew it frustrated Susannah having to answer my constant array of questions I put forth to her. But it never stopped her from answering them.

I mentally shook myself, coming back to the task at hand. I seemed to wander off into more thoughts of Susannah of late. It was becoming distracting and a regular occurrence. One I needed to get in control of soon. As if hearing my thoughts, I distinctly heard the sounds of her feet thumping down the stairs. A persistent edge to her movements. A good indication that she had something on her mind. It hadn't taken me too long to notice and interpret Susannah's moods. Or that her choice of clothing would often reflect how she was feeling.

The same could be said for her footsteps. If she was troubled – like now – her footsteps would be loud and determined. Sure in her decision and her journey. Secure in the confidence she has for herself and her abilities. When she was happy, her steps would be light and gently. Almost like she was floating. But I knew why Susannah was troubled and I couldn't blame her.

I turned in time to see her confidently stroll across the room, dressed in her work uniform she detested so much. I had heard her grumbling about it numerous times over the summer. About the shorts with pleats, a hint of disgust in her tone each time she mentioned them. Always followed by her displeasure at not being able to wear her new summer clothes or shoes. I would listen to each comment choosing to keep quiet in case her wrath should be directed my way. Somethings – I knew – were best left unsaid.

Susannah didn't see me as she marched across her family room heading for the kitchen. I had made myself unseen to her to ward off her queries of what I was doing. I had turned back to my search with a new persistence, only to be broken out of it by the sound of Susannah shrieking in the kitchen. Shortly followed by a lot of foul curses spewing from the what sounded like Brad. I watched shocked and curious as Jake ran into the room followed by his own loud exclamations and his fathers seconds after.

Deeply intrigued and a little bit worried of what was happening in the other room, I soon found myself there. The scene I came across was one of utter chaos and drama. I had arrived just in time to see Susannah pick a carton of juice up off the floor, running to the sink with her arm outstretched and away from her. The carton clutched in her hand and Brad right on her heels. I looked down to see the mess sure to have been made, knowing that couldn't have been what scared her. Much to my surprise I didn't find spilt juice. I found hundreds of bugs in stead. Instantly finding the source of Susannah's screams.

After throwing the carton full of bugs into the sink, Susannah hit a button for the disposal. I saw the look of revulsion and horror on her beautiful face, marring her expression in to a twisted frown. Brad was spitting in to the sink clawing at his throat with his eyes wide and terrified. "Ohmygawd!" He yelled, standing beside Susannah. "Ohmyfreakingawd." With expletive's that would have made my sisters' ear's burn.

I noticed Jake and his father could only stand there in astonishment, not knowing where to look first. I could see Susannah had paled slightly and her hands were shaking by her side looking down at the bugs that had escaped the carton and the sink. She watched them creep closer to her feet before finally snapping out of her disgust. I saw the look of determination come into her eyes the same time I heard her shout. "Step on them!"

Her yell seemed to break Jake and Susannah's step-father out of the disbelieving haze they were in. Instantly starting to stamp on the insects running across their feet, trying to escape their fate and the looming shoe heading for them. Susannah had a wild look in her eye stepping on as many bugs as possible. I could see the effort she was making at holding back even more shrieks. I was surprised she was still standing there and not on the kitchen counter-tops. Her hate for anything small and fast being that high. The shock that she had willingly picked up the full carton still hadn't worn off.

By the time they were finished trying to kill them all, the kitchen wasn't a pleasant scene. Brad had run off quickly after, groaning and looking slightly green. A very unhealthy colour to his face. His hands shaking just as much as Susannah's were. Leaving Jake his father and Susannah to clean up the aftermath. Susannah quickly explained to her stepfather and Jake exactly what had happened, leaving me angered and sick. She told of how she was about to get a glass of orange juice when Brad beat her to it. Opening the new carton and tipping it to his mouth expecting to have cold liquid fill his throat. Only to find the juice had been replaced with bugs.

And so the shouting and bedlam had erupted. I knew just who had done it as soon as she had finished her tale. Maria. Her horrific way of trying to punish Susannah no doubt. She couldn't go to her directly, so she attacked her another way. All because Susannah hadn't done what she demanded of her. Whether Maria had intended for the victim of this vile plan to have been Susannah or not the outcome was still the same. Because now Maria had targeted her family and I knew Susannah wouldn't be so willing to stand back and listen to what she had to say next time. I knew Susannah wouldn't hesitate from fighting back now.

I didn't stick around to observe them clean up the mess. It wasn't a very nice thing to have to do and Susananh's face at having to do it, was too excruciating to watch. I stopped by the shelves in the living room - picking up the book I had chosen – before then returning to the sanctuary of Susannah's room again.

I stood before the window once I had arrived, pressing my lips together to stop myself muttering a curse. I watched the fog slowly recede thanks to the summer sun. I wished it would take my dispirited feelings with it. I hadn't quite expected Maria to have made a move so soon. I realized I wouldn't have known if I hadn't of been downstairs already. I didn't know what I was going to do yet. The thought of going directly to her had crossed my mind. But I knew without too much effort, that she wouldn't appreciate my visit or listen to me. All I could do was stand by Susannah's side when at all possible. And stop her from hunting down Maria on her own. A plan I'm sure to have crept across her mind straight after she discovered who had set up that revolting act.

I heard Spike let out a meek cry making me turn to look at him. I watched as he stretched his paws out, waking from his long nap at last. With another cry - this one stronger than the last – he padded over to my position, jumping on to the soft cushions demanding my attention. Breaking out of my troublesome thoughts and into a soft smile, I granted my beloved pet what he craved. Rubbing his one ear and his whiskers. Almost instantly he broke out in to loud rumbles of purring. Flopping down on to the cushions with all four of his paws in the air. I chuckled at his display, taking comfort from something so normal and heartfelt.

I sat beside him, laying my book I had chosen next to me. I planned on reading it but not until I had given Spike more of my attention. His loud boisterous purrs always filled me with a small glow. The soft feel of his tan fur. The slight vibrations running through him from his purrs of ecstasy. His playful swatting of my hand, glaring at me when I took it away. All making me smile harder.

It wasn't long before he fell asleep again curled up by my thigh. His purrs slowly residing to complete silence. Not willing to sit in the quiet with nothing to hold my attention, I picked up the new book I had acquired. Hoping – as an afterthought - that it wouldn't be missed. I heard and saw Susannah and Jake rushing out of the house on their way to work, their pace hurried and anxious. No doubt running behind because of the incident in the kitchen not long before.

For the better part of the day that was where I stayed. Spike left me for most of it choosing to enjoy the fresh air and warm sun. But he soon joined me again later in the afternoon, his demands for more attention quickly heeded. I had gotten up and stretched my legs a couple of time through out the day, going down to see how Susannah's stepfather and brother were progressing in the garden. Still secure in the knowledge that if they found anything, it wouldn't affect me. I quietly watched for a while before returning to Susannah's room, my senses always open and waiting.

I had seen Jake return from work the usual time he finished but minus Susannah in tow. I didn't worry too much realizing she was probably with her friends. But safe. I would see her when she returned, hoping she hadn't had any kind of contact with Maria or anymore disturbing incidents during the day. Slightly anxious to see her myself for visual proof.

Just as I was turning my attention back to my book, I felt a low rumbling growl coming from Spike beside me. It was a low deep and menacing sound, so different from his usual purring. He was tense and alert, slowly climbing to his paws besides me. His back was arched with a ridge of erect hair along his spine. His tail was bushy and swinging rapidly from side to side. Shocked I noticed his eyes were wide and as black as the night. His teeth were bared and the growls and hisses were only getting stronger. His whole body was shaking with his growling.

I was about to reach out and pet him but he turned around and quickly rushed out the open window. Leaving me extremely confused by his sudden reaction. His feet were scraping along the roof trying to get purchase and away quickly. I only caught a flash of his tan fur - in the tree - before he was gone from my sights. I felt the alarm start to seep in. I had only seen him have that reaction when Max the family dog was about. Or another spirit.

It seemed like minutes – but was only seconds – after, that I started to feel something tugging at the edge of my mind. Almost like a physical pull as though someone was trying to draw me to them. I listened intently picking up on the soft chanting voice of someone. They sounded young and tremulous. The words unclear to me. Like a soft whisper on a breeze - long ago spoken - but only just reaching me. I could see the edges of my vision start to blur, slowly making their way in to a red haze. My ears felt blocked, denying any sound other than the chant to reach me. My skin was staring to tingle with the awareness.

The chanting was becoming louder as though it was coming from my own mind. I couldn't make out what was being said and couldn't seem to keep my concentration. For the first time since Spike ran away did the fear start to take hold of me. I could feel it weighing down on me like a lead weight. The feeling of absolute loss of power and control cementing my terror and dread. I couldn't send out my senses like I could so easily do before. I tried furtively to go somewhere else. To take myself out of Susananh's room and away from the panic. To escape the voice and chanting. Part of me knew what was happening, but unwilling and unable to admit it. To face the cold truth and horror.

With that last thought and overbearing emotion I was gone from Susannah's room. Whisked away from my sanctuary, my haven. The red haze that had been clouding my vision was all around me now winding through my legs and creeping up my body and arms. Blocking my view and escape. The chanting was becoming more persistent. The person was putting such force behind the words enforcing them. My mind refused to accept what was slowly filtering through. I tried stubbornly to hold on to some kind of connection some lucid thought; but I was fighting a losing battle.

I could only look to the void and dark hole above me. The deep endless darkness waiting to pull me in. Eager to take me from my existence here on Earth. Away from all I have ever known and lived for. I was starting to feel lighter almost weightless. The words in the chant sealing my fate. I tried to refuse them. To deny what was happening to me. My will slipping more and more each time. Until finally with one last wave of sorrow and fear I was pulled away from this world and cast into unknown.


The last thing I remembered feeling was the dark creeping void pulling me into it's clutches. The cold iciness and the enveloping quiet. The oppressive feelings of loneliness making my skin crawl. The biting realization of what was happening and by who. Till absolute nothing. No sound, no voice and chanting. The hazy red smoke was no more. Just the bright calming thoughts and feelings trying to fill me. It was as though I had awoken from a nightmare and brought to the deepest most peaceful part of my mind.

When I had opened my eyes all I could see was bright light. Streams of pure contentment flowing all around, trying to seep into me. To fight away the grief and sorrow I so resolutely held on to. The emotions that were all I had left with me, unwilling to let them go just yet. Not until I was ready to accept this as my fate now. The realization of what had happened clear and precise in my mind. I knew I needed to pull myself out of my despair. To face where I was.

As my eyes became more focused and used to the brightness I became more aware of my surroundings. I was lying down, looking up at the bright blue sky so close but so far away. Seeing flashes of colour shooting across it every so often. I turned my head to the side hoping to see more, only to see nothing but fog swirling around my prone form. It wasn't cold like I expected it to be. Nor did it leave my clothes damp. It was just a calm mist swirling in and amongst itself. Creating patterns and art in its wake. I concentrated on the display before me, letting my mind slowly catch up to me. Finally becoming the most alert I had been since before my...leaving.

I didn't even know how much time had passed since I had been ripped away. How long the process has taken. It seemed to go on for so long, but I knew this wasn't the case. Somehow I knew time wasn't a concept here. Hours, days, weeks; they didn't exist. They all just flowed in to one smooth moment after the other. A tiny ripple on the surface of a lake. Content, peaceful and harmonious. All the emotions my heart and soul wanted to avoid and turn away from. To give me time to come to terms with my pain and hurt.

I sat up, hoping to rid myself of the grief and the ache hounding me. Looking around I hoped to see something familiar. Or a way out of this nightmare. I hoped and prayed this was just a dream and that I would wake to find everything back to normal. To be in Susannah's room, talking and laughing with her. Where I was happy, relaxed and content. Where I knew I belonged. Instead of being in this place of peace. Far from how I was feeling. I didn't want to be here. I wasn't ready to leave her.

Pursing my lips and squaring my shoulders against the taunting voice in my mind, I stood to my full height. The one smooth motion barely disrupting the mist around my ankles. I could see large thick pillars standing tall and imposing in different places around me. All spaciously parted, going on for as far as I could see. The light never diminishing on the horizon, just stretching on and on. A pure ethereal glow in all directions. There was no sign of anyone or anything. No voices or sounds around me. Just quiet.

Sighing I walked over to the pillar nearest to me hesitating slightly. I was expecting it to be made of nothing, just an apparition and to disappear on my gentle contact. But I pushed aside the thought and slowly and cautiously I reached my hand out, surprised to feel the cold texture of solid marble beneath my hand. I glided my palm over the surface, amazed at the cool touch. A small smile almost touching the edges of my lips. I could see the faint silver flaws riddling the stone. The significance of seeing something so naturally flawed in a place flowing with peace and calm was not lost on me.

Breaking away from the wonders and views around me, I couldn't suppress a large sigh. I was still alone with just the quiet and the curling mists. Dejected I dropped my hand to my side, turning to lean against the pillar. Using it as a support physically and emotionally. I caught the quick flash of pink out of the corner of my eye turning just in time to see it disappear in to the sky. To join the other array of colours.

There was no denying it was a beautiful place. The large pillars stationed around never casting any shadows or darkness. Just a tall striking strength. Infusing me with my own energy and might. The colours streaming across the large expanse of sky were bright and elegant. Most I have never seen before but for in my dreams. The amazing sight was casting streams of rainbows across the mist at my feet. Coiling in between the patterns and art, creating a backdrop of tranquility.

But still I couldn't accept it. I couldn't enjoy and relish in the serene views and air. I couldn't let in the calm and happiness I should be feeling for being in this heavenly place. I didn't know where I was. If this was a step along towards the next part. Or where I was finally supposed to be. Where every spirit is sent once they have moved on. Is this where I would have come, should I have moved on straight away.

I didn't wish to be here. To have moved on yet. I know I wasn't ready let go. But I wasn't given the choice. She hadn't given me the choice. She had taken the decision away from me. Stripping me of the option to stay by her side, or move on to what was waiting for me. What ever that may be. Taking my fate into her own hands. Leaving me behind with the hurt and the memory.

Question after question rushed through my mind, battling to be addressed and acknowledged. The only one I desperately want to know the answer too; why Susannah would do this to me? I can remember her tear stricken face that night that seems so long ago now. She told me her fears of me leaving her. I could see the sadness in her deep emerald eyes, glistening with un-shed tears. She had worried for me. She had looked at me with such vulnerability, I had taken her into my arms. I had seen fear in her eyes that night.

So why would she wish to do this to me, leaving us both hurt and in pain?

I shut my eyes away from the question. Determined to stamp down on the anguish and grief swelling in my chest I stood upright from my slouched position on the pillar. Refusing to let it take control. To be stronger. I banished the question from my mind knowing there was no way they would be answered now. No way for me to go back and discover the truth. To see her one last time, even to say goodbye. Opening my eyes again, I knew they would be cold and hard to look in to.

Swallowing down the rise of emotion swelling in my throat I took a anticipated look around me. Trying to decide whether or not to start walking around. To see if I could find anything to help me discover my new home or future. Somewhere with answers. I didn't know whether I should stay where I was. Or if I started walking would it be sealing my fate, or not. Would I be stuck her forever.

I never got the chance to find out. Before I had the opportunity to think through my options and decisions, I found myself standing somewhere completely different. All happening so quickly and swiftly and without my knowing, I had to wait for my mind to catch up again. When it finally did, I was shocked by the drastic change of scenery. Gone was the bright peaceful light and tall strong pillars. Gone were the flashes of colour shooting across the blue sky like stars. The air of peace and calm was swept away along with the glowing soft mist. The endless stretch of white, that seemed to go on forever.

Surprised, I found myself standing beneath the blackest night sky I had ever witnessed. The stars were so clear and so many they took my breath away. The sight was beautiful and stunning. I willingly let the smallest smile break through my defences. The first one I had dared wear since I was taken. Looking to my feet I saw the floor obscured by a mist thicker and darker than where I was before. Creating the same swirls around my ankles as before. The quiet was palpable, but not unnerving. Looking before me I could see a hallway stretching on endlessly filled with closed doors. They all looked the same. All made of the same thick hard ageless wood. No light or sound coming from behind them.

I had no idea why I was here, or where I was supposed to go. I knew I hadn't taken myself here though. I knew it was someone or something else that had brought me here. But the question was who? The doors to the sides of me were all clear with no signs attached. Turning on the spot I looked behind me hoping for a different option. I was relieved and grateful to see the hallway only seemed to stretch on one way. Leaving the other free to roam with no boundaries. I took my chances with this direction and avoiding the doors, not wishing to find out what laid beyond them for me.

Hesitantly and wary I took a cautious step forward. Slowly gaining a little courage with each step and progress, I picked my pace up a little. The feeling of anticipation was making my skin tingle and the hair raise on the back of my neck. The feeling grew with each passing second. But the quicker my steps became, the more it seemed I wasn't making any progress. Everything looked the same. The stars seemed to move and change with each glance. I could feel the frustration starting to creep to the edges of my consciousness.

I felt a faint tingle run through me suddenly. The same feeling and rush I got when I could sense a spirit about to appear before me. The hope that I would finally be able to see someone. To have my questions answered, to just be able to speak to someone at last, was instantly forgotten as soon as the person I could feel approaching, made themselves known to me.

I stopped my steps so quickly I nearly lost my balance. I blinked a few times, resisting the urge to reach up and rub my eyes to clear my vision and try again. My breathing hitched considerable. The shock and surprise that came over me, were more powerful than when I had first woke up. The fear swiftly following behind. I made no effort to clear or school my expression. Or to hide my emotions that I knew were on show. I could only to stand and look disbelievingly at who was standing before me.

"Oh," Susannah said, slightly sheepish. "Hi."

The most terrifying part of seeing Susannah standing before me, was the spectral glow she was giving off. The same glow I had only ever seen...on a ghost...


A/N 2: Thanks for reading, please review : )

Anonymous Reviews –

Hikari Reizumi – Wow...blushes thanks! It blew me away reading your review :D Lol, yea the kiss scene is going to be fun. Only one more chapter to go before we're there! Whoo...hehe. I'm glad I could help too. And thanks again for the review : ) Take care.

Meg – Thanks as always! I'm glad you enjoyed it. I can't believe we're nearing the end already...gasp But the next chapter, I am going to have so much fun writing :D Take care.

9 - Thank you for taking the time to review :D I really appreciate any and all feedback. The last chapter and this one have been really hard for me to write. And I wasn't completely happy with it either. So I'm sorry about that. And thank you for the advice, its always handy and really helps : ) I'm glad your enjoying the story so far and for reassuring me I've captured Jesse right. He has his moments, lol. I hope you continue to enjoy the rest of the series : ) Thanks again, take care.

Coming in Chapter 5:Jesse and Suze fight against the clock to save Suze's soul. And Jesse has a final chance to repay his killer...