I've returned home, at least for a while, and thought I should take the opportunity to update the website while I can, and post a new chapter of my Enduring Time series, amongst other things. Sorry for the inevitable delay while I was away dealing with some family issues. Hopefully, I will post more while I take a breather from real life, but my fantasy world could be interrupted abruptly again at any time:-)
On with the show…
Summary: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away… how exactly did Teal'c acquire Sam's precious necklace?
Category: Angst, romance, friendship, drama
Content Warnings: Major character death, mild language, sexual situations
Pairings: Jack/Sam, Sam/Teal'c, Daniel/Vala
Season: Future
Spoilers: Up to and including "Unending"
Author's notes: Thanks to Denise once again - the use of her inspiring plot bunny continues into this chapter. Also, many thanks are due to my patient beta reader, ImmerRDA, for her helpful thoughts and suggestions. All remaining errors are entirely down to me. I am also eternally grateful to those of you who are reading this series and who have sent me such wonderful feedback and words of encouragement.
Enduring Time: Chapter 4
Previously:
The frame had once held a picture of SG-1. O'Neill gave her the picture in the frame as a birthday present many years before when he was still their team leader. He suspected Samantha cherished it. She still had the team shot, and it took its rightful place elsewhere, but when they married she had loved the silver frame so much that she had replaced that photograph with the current one.
"I don't think he'd mind me giving it to you. I figure he'd appreciate it. Teal'c, you being here for the last few days has helped me so much. I'll always be grateful and I want to give you something tangible to… well… as thanks I guess. If what I give you has no value to me, it would be meaningless."
Those words provoked a memory for Teal'c as she had said something similar when insisting he take the necklace that had once belonged to her mother. He had tried to resist, but she had been determined. The Jaffa knew he would fight a losing battle again now, so did not deny her the pleasure she obviously took from giving. Accepting the valued gift gave him pleasure too.
Simultaneously, Sam realized that this was exactly why she had given him the necklace on the Odyssey. They must have been very close for her to do that. She wondered what he was thinking but, once again, did not feel inclined to raise the subject. That would wait for another day, another chance, and Sam knew she would make that chance a reality one of these days.
The story continues:
Flashback to the stranded Odyssey, many years before…
The end of their enduring time together approached rapidly as the five occupants of the Odyssey prepared to implement their plans. Plans that would leave four of them without any memories of the years spent on board the ship, but safely out of harm's way. As she added the finishing touches to the arrangements, Sam Carter was so preoccupied with ensuring she got it right and didn't inadvertently kill them all, that she had not spent much time with Teal'c lately.
Now, her mind drifted away from the work and to Teal'c. She felt guilty because they had little time left to be together, and because she genuinely loved the deeply devoted and affectionate Jaffa. Sam stretched her weary old bones and muscles, rose from her chair, and temporarily abandoned the project to seek out her lover.
Teal'c gave her a will to live when all hope faded with the passing years. He fought tooth and nail to keep her sane. In the absence of her husband, Sam genuinely believed she might have despaired and gone mad had it not been for Teal'c's steadfast support and love. Now, she feared how Teal'c would endure once they returned to Earth and she reunited with her greatest love, Jack O'Neill. Everyone except Teal'c would forget her long affair with the warrior.
The notion was disturbing; even though Teal'c claimed he was prepared and would have no regrets, apparently accepting that he would lose her to his friend O'Neill. He genuinely seemed to believe this was where she belonged. Sam agreed because she still loved her husband, despite also loving Teal'c, but she did not think for one minute it would be that easy. On the other hand, what other options were there? None, as far as she could see.
Sometimes, Sam pondered on Teal'c's relationship with Ishta. Before they left on this mission the pair had still been involved, but Teal'c and Sam never talked about it back then. He never referred to it now, although she had tried to encourage it every so often. Sam supposed the subject was difficult for him to discuss, especially with her, just as the subject of Jack had been between them since they had become lovers.
She did not know if Teal'c loved Ishta or not. Reluctantly, she admitted to feeling the odd twinge of jealousy about the relationship, although realized that was more than a little unfair, as well as hypocritical. However, she figured Teal'c was probably jealous of Jack. He never said anything but it seemed likely.
Sam fervently desired Teal'c happiness, wanting him to find lasting love with someone other than her. It so would not be fair for his life to be otherwise because Sam knew with certainty that she would be happy with Jack for the rest of her life. Teal'c loved her, and she understood those feelings ran deep and true. If she could love two men at once, then he could love two women, couldn't he? She hoped and believed it would make things a lot easier on Teal'c if he could return to that relationship with Ishta once they turned back time.
It was not until she moved away from her work bench that Sam realized how much she needed a break. She was tired, old age she guessed. At one time, she pulled all-nighters almost without batting an eye. These days, she was dead beat after a relatively short time.
Slowly making her way to the ship's communal space, she popped her head around the door to find Daniel and Vala alone. The couple prepared food, but Sam walked in on a loving moment between them that reminded her they would all lose something extraordinary once they returned. Except for Cam. Poor Cam. And Sam herself – she would lose but win at the same time. Jack for Teal'c.
Although sorrowful about the loss of Teal'c, she could not help but look forward to the day she would return to Jack. It was probably a good thing she would not remember these years. How hard would that be? Sam knew she was the lucky one in this respect. No memories, so no regrets or guilt.
She hoped that, despite his memories, Teal'c could accept his radical change of status and that the friendship they had once shared would continue. If it did not, she would always wonder why not and never know, but it would break her heart. The couple had discussed it of course, and Teal'c had pledged his continuing friendship, but what he said now and what reality might bring could be different.
Daniel and Vala broke each other's gaze, turning to look at her with a smile.
"Seen Teal'c?" asked Sam.
"I think he's doing something with Cam… somewhere or the other…" Vala replied, her hand waving vacantly into the air to indicate the rest of the ship.
"Everything okay, Sam?" Daniel asked, and she was not sure whether he meant her personally or her work, so decided a vague answer was required. Sam did not want to stand around chatting with Daniel and Vala. She wanted to spend every spare moment that she could with Teal'c. Besides, the pair needed time together too; time for goodbye to this past before they said hello to a different future.
"Peachy," she responded with a wink, and Daniel grinned. "I'll go find him." Before the couple could reply, she was gone.
Sam found Teal'c with Cam, playing chess. Once upon a time, she might have found them in the gym, sparring, but those days were long gone; leastwise for Mitchell, even if not for Teal'c.
Her lover glanced up as she entered, and smiled, his eyes lighting up at the sight of her. Usually that look never failed to cheer her heart. There had always been something soothing about it because Sam could plainly see how Teal'c felt about her and it made her happy to be loved so. Normally, it thrilled Sam that Teal'c continued to look her that way, despite that she was old and wizened and he still appeared relatively young. He made her feel good about herself.
Now, the look tore at her heart rather than cheering it because she knew once they returned home he would be obliged to hide all such feelings. It was a poignant moment.
Teal'c cocked his head, a questioning expression appearing on his face. "You need me, Samantha?" he asked, standing up with an apologetic bow toward Mitchell for interrupting their game.
She smiled, approaching and taking his strong, large hand into her frail, delicate one. "I didn't mean to butt in, I just…"
"I am certain that Cameron will not be offended by the interruption."
Cam waved a dismissive hand in the air. "You two go right ahead. We can finish this later."
His air was casual, but deep down he resented them, both of them, as well as Vala and Daniel. Cameron Mitchell was a lonely man, embittered by that solitude and regretting it even more than he regretted the loss of his real life, in addition to the interminably boring years spent stuck on board the ship. Going nowhere with nothing truly useful to do was not the way he had ever pictured his future.
Cam tried hard not to feel resentful, but it was difficult. The others seemed so happy and content, but he was not - never had been since the first day they were stranded on the Odyssey. He learned to live with it because he had no choice but, even after all these years, his anger and bitterness seethed inside. Normally, he chose not to show it to the others, taking it out on inanimate objects privately, but sometimes it slipped out. He would become irritable or downright argumentative and obnoxious, deliberately picking a fight just so he could shout at one of the others. Old age had amplified this propensity.
They did not blame him. Indeed, they thought it understandable and sympathized. They could all get on each other's nerves. That was human nature at the best of times, but enhanced for these five by their imprisonment in a confined space from which there was no chance of escape.
This small group of people had not seen a single day's sunlight for years, or breathed the refreshing palliative of real air or felt its breeze on their faces. This fact alone multiplied their predicament beyond what any human should be expected to bear. Isolation, repetitive monotony and a massive overdose of Seasonal Affective Disorder were a combustible combination.
In Cameron Mitchell's opinion, the two couples he was forced to live with could be overly smug. He knew they tried to make him fit, to put him at his ease, but he never truly felt either. How could he? Much of the time, Mitchell felt like the fifth wheel on a precariously balanced automobile. He imagined the famous cliff hanging scene at the end of that movie, "The Italian Job". Cam was the spare wheel whose weight would ensure they all toppled over the precipice.
The couples had each other while he had no one. Sure, he had them, but there was not anyone special. No one to love, no one to hold, no one to truly confide in, no one to make love with. Jeez, he hadn't had sex in what seemed like a hundred years.
What he would give for that; any of it, but particularly the sex. It wasn't simply about sex, a far better way to satisfy frustration than his current solitary methods. It was about intimacy too - the lack of a certain "something" that you could only share with the person who shares your life and bed.
On the other hand, a man has needs, doesn't he? Surely, God had not intended for men to live without sex for all those years. How the heck did priests remain celibate for life? He often wondered but figured it must be devotion to a cause, a belief, which kept them going. Stuck on this tub, Mitchell had no causes or beliefs to turn to in his long hours of need and frustration.
Cam was looking forward to getting home, and was impatient to return. First thing he would do when he got back was get a little drunk, or maybe a lot drunk, and pick up a hot and willing woman… but of course he would not remember that once they made it back. For Mitchell, this was probably a blessing.
Not necessarily so for the others, though, and he understood that. The four had mixed feelings about their undertaking, although no real doubts that it was the right thing to do. Save themselves, Landry, the ship, the Asgard technology – and perhaps humanity in the bargain. Who knew what might happen?
Mitchell sympathized with them, but figured everyone had to make sacrifices. Daniel and Vala, Sam and Teal'c would each sacrifice what they had gained together to get their old lives back. Cam thought he was the one who had been sacrificing for all these years, so it was their turn - and about freakin' time too.
Besides, when it came down to it, Teal'c would be the one to suffer most because he would be the only one to remember. For the rest of them, everything would revert to normal and they would never know any different. That was a comfort; to everyone except Teal'c, of course. Mitchell had to admit he felt for the big guy.
They had all been brooding about the implications of the role Teal'c would play in their plan by retaining his added years and remembering. Although he volunteered to do it himself, Cam was secretly pleased he did not have to make the sacrifice after all. Teal'c was right that he was the logical choice for the job, but it was going to be to be tough.
Sam would go back to O'Neill, rightly, but that did not make it any easier on their Jaffa comrade. Daniel and Vala would return to their usual state of acute but unresolved sexual tension, with sometimes hostile undertones. Did they think no one noticed? Didn't they notice? He figured there was a possibility that some day they might get their acts together in real time. The stoic Jaffa warrior, however… no hope - not while O'Neill was around.
Cam was not certain he could tolerate that any better than he endured this seemingly never-ending nothingness. But at least the nothingness was ending for him in one way or another. Sam would either kill them or save them. He preferred the latter, although the former would be fine by him if it meant getting off this stinking ship or ending this interminable imprisonment.
For Teal'c the memory of this endless time would last forever. If he genuinely loved Sam as it appeared - and Mitchell believed he was devoted to her - Teal'c's torment was only just beginning. So, although Mitchell was a little resentful of Sam's interruption when he was spending some quality time with a friend, he understood the need for them to be together in the short time remaining.
Sam acknowledged Cam's words with a nod, looking up at Teal'c and tugging on his hand to hint that he come with her. Teal'c bowed to Mitchell, obeying her desire because it meshed with his own need to spend precious time with Samantha when they had so little to spare.
On their way back to the cabin they called home, the pair said nothing. Teal'c was the first to speak when they entered and were alone at last.
"What is it, Samantha? Is something wrong?" he queried.
"No, I was thinking about you, is all. I wanted to see you."
"That suits me very well," he replied with a wisp of a smile, pulling her into his arms for a hug as he knew this was what she needed and wanted. He needed and wanted it too. There was so little time. The notion made him heartsick.
"Just what I wanted," she said with a sigh, relaxing into his expansive and powerful arms. Powerful those arms might have been, but Teal'c was as gentle as a kitten when it came to demonstrating affection, something that had surprised her at first, while also delighting her. These days she was used to it.
"Do you wish to lie down, Samantha?" he asked. Feeling her nod against his chest, Teal'c gently led Sam to the bed, and they lay side by side, cuddling.
"You must be tired," he commented, fingers combing softly through her long grey hair.
"I am. Back on Earth I'd have retired years ago and be sitting with my feet up playing bridge or something with all the other old girls and waiting for the nurse to come and change my diaper."
Teal'c chuckled lightly at her imagery, hardly able to conceive of Samantha doing any such thing. He had seen such scenes on TV and, as far as he was concerned, they did not depict any woman who was remotely akin to Samantha Carter. She was one of a kind - a very singular woman.
"That seems unlikely," he said, his thumb scraping over her scalp.
"What do you think I'd be doing back there at my age?" she asked, meeting his affectionate actions with similar ones of her own by smoothing her fingers over his back.
"I have no doubt you would be making waves of some kind."
"Making waves?" she queried looking up into his dark eyes, which twinkled humorously.
Sam recalled that, many years ago when she had first met Teal'c, he had appeared formidable - both humorless and dispassionate. She knew better than that now, of course. He had learned much of human behavior over his years at Stargate Command. Sometimes she had even begun to suspect he was more human than the rest of them. He simply hid it well because he had little option to do otherwise.
His humor had seemed so alien – go figure! But that had evolved just as he grew through his contact and friendship with the Tauri. Now, someone who did not know him might be puzzled by his demeanor, and miss that dry drollness he was given to using, believing he had no sense of humor. But wit was something that Teal'c did not lack in any way. His use of the English language to crack witticisms was subtle, yes, but very human.
"You are a person who will never cease to make waves, Samantha," he added with a smile.
Once, Teal'c had found smiling difficult, it seemed. His lips would form into a grimace as if he'd never had any practice at smiling. She could remember Jack jokingly telling him to practice because his attempts to smile had been unnatural. They made him appear forbidding and scary for those they wished to befriend on other worlds.
Since then he'd had lots of practice and his smile was natural. It lit his face in a way that made him friendly and welcoming. He still used those muscles of his face sparingly, however, even after all this time. Sam found that smile adorable and could not fail to return it in kind. So she grinned inanely at him for a short while before burying her face in his chest and snuggling up closer.
"I'm worried, Teal'c," she said after a lengthy pause.
"You are having difficulties with your solution to our situation?"
"I meant for you, about you," she replied, looking up and searching his face.
He had no wish for her to be concerned. Squeezing her gently, and then starting to caress her back with his hands, he well understood what was bothering her.
"You need not."
"Yes, I do. This is going to make you unhappy and I don't want to make you unhappy." Although he continued to caress her, Teal'c failed to respond. When she pulled away from him and sat up, he was surprised. Reaching around her neck, Sam unclasped the necklace she wore so frequently, and held it out to him.
"I want you to have this. A token of love, of remembrance," she said.
Teal'c appeared taken aback by her offer of such a token and propped himself up on an elbow, staring at her and shaking his head.
"I will never forget, Samantha. I have no wish to forget."
She smiled, but her hand reached out for his free one and tried to press the necklace into it. "Please take it."
He looked dismayed. "But this was your mother's necklace. It is precious to you. I cannot."
Samantha had spoken to him about her mother many times; how much she loved and missed her. She had revealed her past, her heartbreak and sorrow. He knew the necklace was one of the few truly tangible possessions that reminded her of that past and of her mother's love.
After her mother's death, Jacob Carter gave her the necklace, placing it around her neck and telling Samantha that her mother always intended her to have it when she came of age. To Teal'c, this appeared to be a solemn rite and Jaffa were very familiar with the sanctity of such rites. Rituals had ruled their lives for centuries, and continued to.
He considered that such a rite of passage should be respected and adhered to, remembered and cherished. So, although moved that she should wish to bequeath him this treasure, Teal'c was reluctant to breach the sanctity it represented. The necklace was a possession beyond value.
"If it wasn't precious to me, there would be no point in giving it to you. I love you. I want you to remember that always, even when it will seem that I don't," she persisted. Her words stirred Teal'c's heart and his hand reached up to her cheek, his thumb starting to stroke it gently.
"I do not need a token to remember that, Samantha. I cannot accept such a gift." He was perturbed to see that his refusal upset her.
"I really want you to have it. Please," she begged. "Maybe you will need it one day. I have to know that you can look at this and think well of me, and of us, these years - of our love, of mine."
"I anticipate nothing less than thinking well of you, or us," he insisted.
"Teal'c…" she started with a doleful expression.
Sitting up now, he grasped the hand that held the necklace, without taking the gift, and interrupted.
"You will remain in my heart forever," he said resolutely.
'I wish I could say the same,' she thought. Of course, Teal'c was in her heart and always would be, but as a friend and nothing more. Throughout her years on this ship, Sam's heart had belonged to two men, but she knew that once time rolled back, it would belong to only one - Jack O'Neill, her beloved husband.
If not for Jack, Sam realized that something more than friendship between her and Teal'c might have been possible in their real time; if they would ever have dared to venture there. In reality, it was not feasible. Unique and extraordinary circumstances had thrown them together and would pull them apart with equal velocity and ruthlessness.
"This is my heart, Teal'c," she said, extricating her hand from his and taking advantage of his open palm to press the necklace into it and close his fist around the gift. "This is the part of my heart and soul that loves you dearly and always will. Please take it."
Teal'c expected teary eyes filled with overwrought emotion to accompany her plea, but they did not. It was ironic that he might have been able to steel himself against tears to resist her gift, but could not when what her expression conveyed was love, not sorrow. He supposed that she realized that.
Kissing her brow, he eyed her necklace and rubbed it with his fingers. "I shall treasure it always, Samantha. I know it means much to you, and it will mean much to me. But you will not recall gifting it to me."
She nodded with a regretful air. "I know, but it doesn't matter. Its loss will remain a mystery that only you could resolve, although I doubt you ever will."
Teal'c remembered those moments with fondness. She had been right about the necklace, which steadied and comforted him in times of doubt and pain. He would hold and caress it in his fingers, looking upon it and recalling her love, that it had been real and true and deeply felt.
Many times in retrospect, Teal'c was pleased he had accepted the token of her love, that part of her heart and soul that had belonged to him for years. So too would he be content that he had accepted this new token of her friendship, the photograph of Jack and Sam in its frame filled with memories. It represented their enduring and deep friendship and that remained more precious to him than almost anything.
TBC
