Outcome

I feel light headed. I'm not sure what kind of wine Anatolius has gifted us, but I feel like it has had a much bigger impact on me than the stuff I'm used to. It was nice of him though, to provide us with food and drink just because I told him a story. Unnecessary, but nice. I love telling stories and he and his wife sure were a willing audience. That's exactly why I made such a show of enjoying the food. Granted, it was a lot better than the things we usually eat on the road, but it was mostly a sign of gratitude that we took our time to finish that plate. At least that's what I was doing. I'm sure Xena had her own reasons.

I could tell that she really did enjoy the free meal and the wine, but I also knew that underneath that casual display of enjoyment she was nervous. Thinking about the reasons for her nervousness made me very twitchy. I think I hid that reasonably well, but I did drink more than I should have.

Today has been the strangest, most wonderful day ever. Sure, it started out messy with my impromptu profession of love, and for a minute there I was convinced I'd made a huge mistake, but then she pushed her lips on mine and my day turned around. My world turned upside down and I still feel like I'm living a dream. It felt so surreal and at the same time too good to be anything but real. You can't dream that kind of happiness.

Every time I look at her lips now, I'm reminded of her taste, of how it feels to be that close to her and my heart does this weird, fluttery little dance inside my chest.

She kissed me, exactly like I've been wanting her to do. Boy did she kiss me. Her lips could have killed me, that's how good they felt, how delicious they tasted. I wanted more instantly and for a while I got the impression that I would get my wish right there and then. But she backed off before such a thing could happen, and hasn't kissed me again.

We haven't been alone since and I'm certain that's a conscious decision on her part. Xena obviously hasn't decided if she wants to act on her feelings. It's quite ironic if you think about it. She has a line of ex lovers that reaches from Amphipolis to Potidaea, and from what I've gathered, all those connections were pretty much completely meaningless, yet she wasted no time jumping into bed with any of them. I'm sure that if she hadn't been known as "the destroyer of nations" she may have been dubbed "the rider of warlords."

Not that I have a problem with that, everyone has a past and there is nothing wrong with having a healthy sexual appetite. It's just very striking that she needs to think about "what is right" when it comes to me.

In a way it makes sense, because we will have a big fat problem if it doesn't work out. It also doesn't add up that she gave herself so easily to people who didn't give two shits about her, and has to take a step back before giving herself to me. I love her. I'm not sure it's really about our friendship. Obviously, that's part of it, but I think it's mostly about something else. She is scared. I don't know if she's scared of getting hurt or of losing control. Perhaps both, or maybe she buried her sexual desires together with her dark side and is afraid that unleashing one will unleash the other.

Whichever is the case, I have no intention of letting her hide her feelings and desires. I'm too selfish to allow that. I know there is nothing to be afraid of. Nothing will turn my friend back into who she used to be, I won't ever let that happen. I don't even believe it's a real possibility, not any more. And about me hurting her, I will never do anything to hurt her. She'll just have to trust me.

She gets up off the chair she's been sitting in for what feels like hours, finally ready to go upstairs and I turn into a shaking ball of nerves. I follow her example and the wine hits me twice as hard as soon as I'm standing. The world starts spinning and my legs feel terribly unsteady. I wobble after her, which requires an awful lot of concentration. She somehow seems to be moving at the speed of light. She's gone before I even manage to reach the door to the hall that houses the stairs.

Suddenly a strong arm wraps itself around my waist and for a moment I think she's come to my rescue, but she hasn't. It's one of the other guests. A decent looking guy with a lot of facial hair who sat a couple of tables over the whole time we were eating.

"Let me help you," he offers but it's not really a question, it's a statement. He's already holding me and guiding me towards the door.

"I'm fine, really. Thank you, but I don't need your help," I say as I try to free myself.

"Where's your room?," he asks, ignoring my words.

"I'm perfectly capable of getting myself there, if only you'd let me…"

Before I can even finish that sentence the guy has picked me up and is carrying me up the stairs. I don't protest, although I really find it very annoying. I think he honestly means well and if he doesn't, well, what can I say? Having a warrior princess within earshot might come in handy. She's not just within earshot, I find out when we reach the top of the stairs. There she is, standing with her arms folded over her chest, this semi threatening expression on her face.

My uninvited knight in shining armour practically drops me when he sees her. He lets me go very abruptly and since I'm not exactly capable of dealing with sudden movements at this point. I stumble and basically deposit myself into her arms. There's the upside of not having that much control over your body.

"What's going on here?, " she asks.

I look over at the man behind me.

"This kind, youngish man was just helping me up the stairs," I answer, pointing at my saviour like she didn't just see him carrying me.

"Mhmm. The question is why?"

"Wine," I point at myself. "A lot, apparently."

"Aha." A faint smirk crawls over her face. "Thank you," she nods in the direction of my personal courier, puts her arm around my shoulder and navigates us to our room. Her arm stays in place even after she's closed the door behind us.

"I can't leave you alone for two minutes without you making new friends."

"I'm fine, thanks for your concern, just incredibly hot," I say, pulling myself free from her and dragging my rebellious body over to the bed. I plop down unceremoniously, hoist myself into a sitting position and start taking off my top.

"Yes you are," I hear her mumble.

I look at her to find her staring at me in a way she never has before. The look in her eyes makes me feel weak suddenly. It takes a while to get my top off, due to the wine and it doesn't help that she keeps her eyes on me the entire time. Once I succeed in freeing my upper body from clothes I struggle with my skirt and underwear, till I'm as nude as the day I was born, if you don't count the boots. I'm not really in the habit of sleeping naked but tonight it seems like an excellent idea.

I bend over and attempt to unlace my boots, which is even harder to do because it's so difficult to keep my balance.

"Sit up," she instructs, suddenly a lot closer than she was before. I sit back up and watch her face as she squats down and starts to undo the laces.

"How drunk are you exactly?"

"I was fine until I got to my feet. That wine is something else. But it's mostly physical."

"Are you sure?," she chuckles. "You were awfully quick to take your clothes off."

"That was part of the plan," I confess.

"Oh yeah? What plan is that?" She looks at me as she peels off my boots one by one. Then I'm completely nude, and she's still fully dressed. I get the feeling my plan didn't really work out the way I planned.

"For part two of my plan you need to lose this.. metal thing," I say touching the shoulder part of her breastplate.

She gets up and takes it off.

"Slightly better," I comment. "But I think you'd better take everything off."

"Are you absolutely sure that would be best?"

"It's imperative."

I don't expect her to listen but she does. I get to watch her strip off her clothes and this time I don't have to hide that I'm looking. I'm not exactly unfamiliar with her body, but it's like I've not seen it before. She's tall and lean, strong, very well proportioned, almost a perfect hourglass. My eyes linger on her bosoms, they're bigger than mine, just over a shapely handful. Her breasts might be my favourite part of her body. They're so beautifully round and full, decorated with light brown nipples that seem to be looking me right in the eye. Her skin is smooth and peach coloured all over, there are no scars that I can see. I wonder if that's a side effect of our resurrection. I continue staring long after she's finished undressing. I want to touch her, but I'm enjoying this feeling of anticipation.

"Now what?"

"Come here and kiss me," it's definitely the wine talking. I am not that brave. I can be, if I have an idea what I'm getting myself into. Right now, I'm bluffing. I only vaguely know the kind of things two women get up to in the sack. I've read some scrolls, but they weren't exactly instruction manuals. With all that flowery language it was hard to know what was exactly going on. Luckily I'm blessed with a vivid imagination. I know what I'd like to do, what I'd like to achieve, but it would help if I had either a clear plan, or full control over my body, preferably both.

She comes to me and I lose all coherent thought. Her body slides over mine as she pushes me down while kissing me. She's so soft, her lips so hot, her hair silky against my skin. I burrow my hands in that hair. I've been kissed before, but not like this. A simple meeting of the lips had never had such an astounding effect on every fibre of my body. All parts are connected, that much has never been more clear. I tremble all over. She's on top of me and every part of my skin that's connected to hers is catching fire.

Heat rises up inside of me, like she's pouring it into me. I feel somehow more alive, like I've been struck by lightning. It's an exquisite current that flows through me. Inescapable and all consuming. All she's doing is kissing me, imagine what could happen if she really applied herself.

She suddenly lets go of my mouth, I groan in protest.

Her eyes are all pupils when she looks at me.

"Gods, you're beautiful," I stammer.

"What's next?," she bites her lip.

"Aren't you the one with all the experience?"

"Maybe."

"Then how come I am the one telling you what to do?"

"I don't have any experience with you, besides I'm very, very rusty."

"Don't you have many skills?"

She nods with this cute sexy grin on her face.

"Then I suggest you start using those skills on me, warrior princess."

"Warrior princess?," she laughs. "Why do I get the impression you want something from me?"

"Maybe because I do?"

"Ah, yes of course."

Her hand moves over my body from my neck to my thighs. It's a gentle sweeping caress that leaves a trail of goosebumps in its wake. I quiver. Once she reaches my inner thigh, she starts moving her hand back up, just as painstakingly slow. Her fingers fan out, her nails occasionally scratching me. It feels absolutely delicious.

Her eyes bore into mine, observing my reaction to her thorough caresses. It's like she's touching more than just my skin. My breathing gets heavier as desire is slowly filling up my body. I don't think I've ever wanted her more.

I grumble when her hand leaves me.

"Don't stop now plea.." her mouth shuts me up. Her tongue slips between my lips. She rolls onto her side so she can run both her hands over my skin while she keeps kissing me. Her fingers caress, knead, pinch and tickle, paying attention to every place they can reach. The combination is mind- boggling. I feel like I'm losing myself in stronger and stronger waves of pure pleasure. She's only just begun and I'm already hooked on this feeling. Addicted to the way she's making use of my body.

Her lips move away from my mouth, trail kisses down my neck, nibble on my ear and then move down to my collarbone. She's all hot breath, warm tongue and gently grazing teeth. I'm loving every second.

I've fantasized about this a lot, but nothing beats this new reality.

Her hands become bolder, searching out places that I'm not used to being touched. I'm soon gasping for air. A wet, hot mouth travels down my torso, stopping as it finds some sensitive place to latch on to. My back arches, my heart beating faster and faster. I feel so hot I break out in a sweat, but it's all good. I'm amazed by my body's seemingly endless capacity to feel delight. It's all building up inside me until I'm practically overflowing.

She slowly moves down, my princess. Further and further until she reaches the epicentre of my desire. The place where all my pleasure seems to reside. At first just her fingers, all gentle and careful, but effective. Then she moves her head between my thighs and I can feel her breathing over me. That already feels so overwhelmingly good that I'm not sure I like that idea.

"What are you doing?," I ask when she's about to put her lips down there.

She looks up at me, and I can see my own desire reflected in her eyes. I'm not the only one who is on fire. My stomach squeezes, sending red hot jolts through my lower abdomen.

"Trust me, this is the best part."

She's not wrong of course. My mind is blown by what she does next. I transform beneath her mouth. I turn into a new version of me, an impudent pleasure seeking thing. I grab her hair and pull on it, guiding her to the right place and keeping her there. I've never experienced these physical reactions, never heard myself make such blatantly brazen noises.

I've only been with men before and you'd think that generally speaking, they would be better equipped to pleasure a woman, but, as I'm discovering, that is far from the truth. No man has ever had this effect on me.

She seems so hungry for my pleasure, for me and that is a big part of my enjoyment.

I start convulsing all over, the pleasure becoming so intense it's almost unbearable. I feel like I'm about to explode with desire, and that is exactly what happens.

She doesn't stop just because I feel like I reached my peak. She continues, like she can't get enough of me. I try asking her if it isn't my turn by now and she just tells me "no", before diving right back in. I am in no shape to protest. All I want is for her to go on.

Eventually she does stop, just before I think I'm gonna pass out. She wraps herself around me. Her skin just as heated and slippery as mine as it presses against me.

"This is the part where you tell me how good I am," she whispers with her lips against my skin.

"I'll admit that I'm starting to agree with the many skills part."

"That's all? Starting to agree?"

"Well, I wouldn't want you to get cocky."

"That good, huh?"

"I never knew you were so insecure."

"I'm not."

"Sure sounds like it."

"It's just common courtesy."

"How about I write up a report and grade your efforts first thing tomorrow?"

"Very funny."

"Is that a no?"

"Fine, be that way."

I burrow my face deeper into her chest and kiss her skin.

"Xena, listen to me. I've dreamt of this since before I even knew women could love other women. Since the very first moment I met you. I've fantasized about it countless times. However, reality was better than any fantasy. "

"That is amazing."

"It's probably because I'm so crazy about you, you know. I don't think you could have done it wrong. I just really, really love you."

"Alright, alright. Jeez, I love you too, but that's no reason to go all mushy on me. "

"You're terrible."

That's what I say but I feel great. It feels bloody fantastic to finally be able to tell her exactly how I feel. To lie in her arms like this, after all this secret longing and hoping, waiting for something to change. It finally has and the best part is that this is only the beginning.

"You're mine tomorrow," I announce.

"I can't wait."