I Probably Wouldn't Be This Way By: blondenhot

The next morning, Jude got up, took a shower, did her make up and headed straight to G-Major. Sadie was already there, seated at the receptionist desk.
Kwest was sitting in Studio A waiting for me to start another day of work. Ugh.
I opened the doorwith a small smile (but a smile none-the-less) on my face.
Tommy was gone last night had proved it. Amber. His daughter. Portia. Bits and pieces of our conversation replayed over and over in my head. He's not comin back...he's gone. "Kwest...I have a song...and I also have a song I need to write down. Do u wanna start recording now or later?" I asked him with a chuckle. Kwest staring there at me, obviously amazed that I had wrote a song. Had it really been so long since I had written a good one?
Uh duh Jude. Three months.
"Uh, yeah. We can record now Jude. Whats it called?" he asked me. His eyes were still wide with shock.
"It's called Everytime I Hear Your Name, Kwest. Tell me what you think, ok"
I told him sitting down on the couch opposite of him.
I strummed the chords and halfway through the song the tears came. My voice was rough, more raw and in my opinion it made the song oh so real. It displayed the emotions I was feeling. I knew everytime I sang this song I would cry. It was becoming close to my heart. I played the last verse, laid the guitar down, cradled my head in my hands and cried.
"Oh, Jude." Kwest said, scooting closer to me. He slowly wrapped his arms around me, as if I might bite him. I'm not that vicous. Yet. I cried into his shoulder.
"He called me, Kwest! He has a freakin daughter. A little girl. Amber. I don't even know where he is! He didnt say. Kwest...he's not coming back.He's my rock.
And I...I love him so much!" I sobbed into his neck. I gripped his shirt as if I was scared that he might drift awy any second.
"Jude, I, um, I knew about his daughter. We all did." He said. I shot away from like he was on fire. He had known!
" Who is we?" I asked him. The fire was now burning in my eyes.
"Sadie, Darius, Liam, and...me." I flew out of that studio, across the room, and into the office before I knew what I was doing. I pushed open the door and threw my self into the neatly decorted room.
"You knew! YOu knew about Tommy's little girl the whole time. I bet you even know where he is! I bet you all do. I've been wandering around here with a broken heart blaming myself for his leaving for months and this whole time you knew why he really left. Hell, you knew where he had gone! How could you!" I told him slamming my fists down on his desk. I was furious and I felt so betrayed.
"Jude get real. How would you have taken it if we told you everything we knew?
You didn't have a clue about Amber and if we would have told you that he had gone to Montana-" Darius stopped when he looked at Kwest. Behind me, Kwest was making stupid stop motions with his hands and face.
"Montana? He lives in Montana?" I asked them amazed. He wasn't even in Canada anymore. This was becoming worse than I thought. Sadie moved to where she was standing next to the door. She knew me to well. She knew about Tommy! Who is she?
" I, um, I gotta go.Now." I said making my way to the door. Right as I stepped out of the doorway Sadi grabbed my right arm. I looked down at where her hand touched my arm.
It was the softest of touches but I looked t it as if it burned. I yanked my arm away from her touch.
" Dont touch me again." I said, giving her an hurt stare. This was the worst kind of betrayal. I couldn't believe she had known. She stumbled backwards, caught off guard by my sharp tone.
I turned, grabbed my guitar, and fled the Studio. I drove myself home and locked myself in my room with a bootle of water and some crackers. It was gonna be a long night. I sat down with my guitar. I had a song.

"Got an date a week from Friday With the preacher's son Everybody says he's crazy I'll have to see I finally moved to Jackson When the summer came I won't have to pay that boy To rake my leaves I'm probably going on and on It seems I'm doing more of that these days

chorus I probably wouldn't be this way I probably wouldn't hurt so bad I never pictured every minute without you in it Oh, you left so fast Sometimes I see you standing there Sometimes it's like I'm losing touch Sometimes i feel that i'm so lucky To have had the the chance to love this much God, give me a moments grace Cause if i'd never seen your face I probably wouldn't be this way

Mama says, that i just shouldn't speak to you Sadie says, that i should just move on You oughtta see the way these people look at me When they see me round here talking to this guitar Everybody thinks I've lost my mind But I just take it day by day

chorus I probably wouldn't be this way I probably wouldn't hurt so bad I'd never pictured every minute without you in it Oh, you left so fast Sometimes I see you standing there Sometimes I feel an angels touch Sometimes I feel that I'm so lucky To have had the chance to love this much God, give me a moment's grace Cause if I'd never seen your face I probably wouldn't be this way I probably wouldn't be this way

Got a date a week from Friday With the preacher's son Everybody says i'm crazy Guess I'll have to see. "

I sat my guitar down and finished writing the lyrics in my notebook. Amother hit. I crawled into my bed and turned off the light. Sleep...sounds so sweet to my broken heart. Exactly the medicine I need.

Hey ya'll! Ok here's chapter 4! Tell me what you think! Thanks again to Tanya50801 and angel422 and to criminal insanity! Ya'll are awesome! Thanks to everyone whos reading this story to...it means so much to me!