Baby or beast ch 4
*Notice*
The introduction of the new character was a challenge in itself. Because of were the story was going, with the Beast alone, i didn't really know how to introduce Bella in the story. I used some beauty and the beast references and i think it turned out well, in spite of all of the difficulties that i experienced while writing the chapter. The reason why it took so long to upload it was because i wrote 2 different versions of this chapter , and i have to admit that i wasn't satisfied with either of them, so i decided to combine the material from both version of chapter 4 and create this one.... Some feedback would be really appreciated!
Now, on with the story...
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-A few hours after the rescue, Léon's home-
After a long walk in the woods with Bella safely cradled in his arms, Leon finally arrived at his destination. The journey home had not been difficult by any means, but it has been extremely stressful and frightening. He was worried that the girl he was holding so closely would wake up at the wrong time, while he held her in his arms. He didn't want to think about how terrified she would be when she would see him for the first time.
He was a tortured soul, anyone could see it. One look into his eyes and all the pain and sorrow that he felt everyday would be apparent. He could only hope that he would be brave enough to face what was coming.
With nothing left to do except watch the girl sleep, Leon began to wander off in his mind. He began to recall the things that happened the night before. He saved her, whoever she was from the wolves and he had brought her back to his home to look after her. He could not just leave her there. That would be unacceptable.
Now she was settled in his bed, she still hasn't woken up and he was clueless about what to do with her. He was beyond confused and for the first time since the rescue, he was terrified.
A Beast, that was scared of a girl.
Kind of stupid right?
Its not like he was scared of the girl, it was the situation that stressed him the most. He's never been alone with a girl before and he had no idea what could happen. He wished that his mother was here. She could have told him what to do, how to act and exactly what to say. But she wasn't here and he could already foresee the outcome of this. She would scream, she would run away and even if he tried to explain, she would leave. He didn't want to think about those things. He didn't want to face the reality of the situation he was in. There has to be another way.
A chance to make things right. To make it all better.
Was it too late to make a choice?
Would she believe him, that he saved her life?
He wanted to believe that she would but he knew better than that. He had been deceived so many times that he knew too well that it wouldn't happen.
Things would not work out the way he wanted them to.
Good things never happened to people like him.
Monsters, Freaks, Beasts...
He didn't even know it they were others like himself in the world.
She would never care about him, not in the same way that he seemed to care about her. He didn't know why he saved her; he just knew that he had to.
He kept imagining all sorts of different scenarios in his mind. All the possibilities, all the thing that could happen and all the things that he knew wouldn't. All the things that he had no control over, that was inevitable. Those visions that he had about the future of this situation woke up long forgotten feelings on his part.
He hated solitude.
He's been trying to ignore these feelings ever since he left his mother. He never admitted it, but he hated being alone.
He could never stand it. He needed someone with him, close to him. His clean state of mind depended on it.
He craved human contact like a drug, it was so unfair. She was there, so close to him, and yet so far away.
She was only a few feet away, looking so innocent. But he was so nervous.
What was he scared of?
He was terrified of himself, so much that he couldn't do anything. He couldn't breathe, he couldn't move and the worst part is that he couldn't think clearly. He had no idea what to do with himself. He wanted to touch her, to hold her in his arms, he wanted that so badly. That craving for comfort was overwhelming.
then, he started to feel it again. The numbing pain he's been living with for as far back as he could remember, he had such sadness inside of him. It was too much to bear, as he grew older, he only knew that it would get worse.
Things started badly for him. His existence started badly enough, and it would probably be like that for the rest of his life.
The very idea could keep him up at night.
With nothing better to do, he began to silently walk around the house. Still lost in thoughts, he wanted to make sure that everything was perfect. He started to clean up a few things, just to try and distract himself. Books, Drawings and Sketches were all over the kitchen table. He loved the Arts and he had always loved to read. It was his greatest passion. He had been reading and collecting books ever since he was a child. His mother had taught him how to read, and homeschooled him since he couldn't go to an average school like everyone else. He got his passion for literature from his father, he didn't remember him but his mother used to tell him stories about his old man. How they had met, what he liked to do, but she never spoke about their divorcé. Léon knew that he was the reason why they were no longer together. It was just another thing that he couldn't change. Another situation he was responsible for. And something else to feel guilty about. Sometimes, he felt like such a failure. He had ruined their lives, he was sure of it. His parents would have been better off if he had never been born. His mother would've had a wonderful life, and she would still be happily married to the man she once loved more than anything.
Léon never understood why she chose him over his father. She probably felt sorry for him. That had to be it. He had been born an animal, a monster. She pitied him because she knew that no one would ever give him a chance. No one else would have wanted to take him in, no one else would care for him and he couldn't blame them. Léon knew that if his mother would have made the choice to give him up, his life would have been very different, and much worse. He probably would have ended up in a cage. Locked up, the other vicious animals. Were people would have paid to see him. He would have turned into some kind of sideshow freak.
Thinking about these things would always bring tears to his eyes. He hated himself for being like this.
Weak ,and horribly monstrous.
He turned his attention back to his guest, or whatever she was. She wasn't his prisoner, which was certain.
She looked so peaceful, so calm.
He looked at her with intensity, wondering what would happen and what could never be.
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I would like to apologise for the amount of time that it took me to finish this chapter but from now on ill give myself a maximum of 2 weeks to write each new chapter of the story. Thank you for you're patience.
The new chapter will be a dream sequence from Bella's p.o.v
New update soon!
