Did you know Jet Pack Guy's super paranoid about everything? He's got a really fancy security system set up in his igloo for when he goes to sleep. Motion detectors, security cameras, the whole shebang. He's even got the whole system rigged to contact the EPF if it isn't turned off quickly enough.
I found all this out the hard way.
I don't know why, but with all the cool powers I have, I can't turn intangible. The closest I can do is turn into dense, green gas, and apparently that was enough to set off alarms.
So it was about three in the morning, and I set off these BLARING alarms and some bright red, rotating cop lights because I accidentally passed through a motion laser or something. My first reaction was to move under Jet's bed as fast as I could; not the coolest thing I could've done, but it was better than nothing.
As soon as I was under the bed, I heard a groan and then bed springs creaking. Jet got up from his bed and waddled over his work desk (he's got a work desk in his igloo, just to show how much of a ~party animal~ he is). Something clicked, and the blaring alarms and red lights turned off. He hesitated. I think he was looking around for what could've caused a disturbance? I dunno.
He started waddling (I hate using that word. Damn penguins.) back to his bed. I started fearing the worst and I crammed myself to the top of the bed's underside. Sure enough, Jet checks under the bed just to make sure. I guess the light was too dim for him to see me.
"Hm." Jet stood back up and gave his jet pack, which sat in its own puffle bed, a reassuring pat. "Stupid lasers," he mumbled. This grown man leads what is basically a kid-friendly military. I love kiddie dimensions.
After Jet got back into bed, I decided to wait until he started snoring. Sure enough, after a good half hour of me burning dust bunnies out of boredom, he's snoring like a lawnmower.
Possessing people while they're asleep is usually really easy. No resistance, usually no sensing me, and best of all, I get to dig around in their head without any weird reactions.
It's kind of hard to explain. The problem is, let's say I decide to possess Rookie while he's talking to JPG. Even if he doesn't sense me, if I try to find info on whatever weaknesses the Director has, Rookie would probably be freaked out because he's suddenly thinking about the Director instead of whatever he was thinking about while he was talking to JPG. Basically, I'm hijacking my host's train of thought.
Anyways, if I possess someone in their sleep, the only thing I'm hijacking is dreams, and dreams are already weird and fragmenty. And unless Jet keeps a dream journal, I doubt he's gonna start noticing how realistic and dull his dreams are gonna become. Dunno why, but apparently that's another effect of my sleep-possession.
I cleared my metaphorical throat. "EPF weaponry."
Minds are like Googles, lemme tell ya. Immediately, there's a bunch of blurry pictures and thoughts connected to what Jet knows about EPF weaponry.
Snowball and fish cannons. Stronger than they sound. Based on futuristic tech from 4014. The 1000 prototype ended up being too strong and fractured one of ribs. Some units of the 1k prototype are still kept around for emergencies. Current versions can still cause moderate to heavy bruising, numbness, and/or dizzyness.
That's not enough. I wanna push the E for Everyone rating here, dolt.
Robotic combat penguins. G's work. Still experimental, in the 2750 versions, more or less. Mostly used for trainees. One of the independent projects Director allowed post-Blackout. Most are connected to the control panel in the combat headquarters training room. Not useful fo-
Waitwaitwait. Combat headquarters training room? Interesting.
"Combat headquarters ."
-3rd floor. Most agents cannot access it until given clearance. Clearance is only given to agents with at least 50% coding. Players n-
Okay, I don't care for coding. The EPF has negative floors?
"EPF size."
Eight floors, counting top and bottom floors. Various hidden bases scattered throughout the island. Only Director knows where all bases are located. Seen four. Rookie and Dot've said there's at least-
Slow down. Geez, I bet this guy just loves taking orders from people when he's awake. Most hosts aren't as responsive to this stuff.
This is getting boring. "Lethal weaponry."
Illegal. No known laser on Club Penguin can fully penetrate bone, much less muscle. Irresponsible use of blades highly discouraged and punishable by ban. All possibly lethal weapons from local villains have been either destroyed, repurposed, or on ICE.
What the hell? Is that an acronym?
"Weapons on ICE."
Puffle brain boxes. Used to mind control puffles. Power crystals. They give holders unusual powers. Remains of Herbert's inventions. Relatively useless, unless a gadgeteer like Herbert can get them. Classified crates from Director. Not sure what's in them. No one knows and there are only rumors.
Boy oh boy! What a great selection! I am just beaming because of all the possibilities here! Not. Gee whiz, are all kiddie dimensions this limited?
"Director crate rumors."
Have been said to hold Virus. Accidental fusion of computer and biological virus from early biological experimentation for party transformations. Intensely volatile. Known to take over hosts and spread very quickly. Incurable. Only option for infection is to delete host or contain them for more elaborate cleansing process.
Yikes. Okay, nevermind what I said about kiddie dimensions being limited. As cool as "Virus" or whatever sounds, I don't exactly want people getting "deleted." I can't feed off dead people if they don't get scared. Wait, Jet's still going.
...have been said to hold Gary's "independent" machines after Blackout. No evidence that he's gotten more violent since Blackout. Only more absentminded, shorter temper but still performs just as badly in combat training. No longer allowed to follow through independent projects without Director's permission and supervision. Rookie assigned to help G and supervise him "undercover." G gets antsy when asked about crates.
Whoa. Wait, wait wait waaaaait. This is getting really interesting now.
