The next day is a pool party before the big rose ceremony, where Brockton will say goodbye to two more girls. Pool parties obviously let both Brockton and the audience see the girls in bikinis, so the producers have already told Jane to prep for several more day-long pool escapades in the coming weeks.
Jane, in her ubiquitous black, is standing around the pool, sweating balls, as the girls trickle out of the house and cover themselves with tanning lotion. It's her job to be attuned to the comings and goings of the girls, but it's not professionalism that makes Jane aware of the moment that Maura emerges.
Unsurprisingly, her bathing suit, while still a bikini, is slightly less revealing and slightly more sexy than the other girls'. She looks fucking phenomenal. She heads over to a lounge chair and gently covers herself in SPF 50 before angling an umbrella over her head and settling down with yet another thick medical journal. It isn't two minutes before a producer hustles over and pulls the journal from her hands, replacing it with Vogue. As soon as his back is turned, Maura makes eye contact with Jane. Maura quirks an eyebrow and Jane rolls her eyes. Maura's smile crinkles the corners of her eyes, and she wrinkles her nose just a bit.
Jane feels a lot of feelings.
Maura opens the Vogue, and focuses on it just as intently as she does her journals, folding down several pages and at times bringing the magazine right up to her face to examine something.
It's endearing as shit.
A few hours later and Jane is absolutely sweltering. Summer in Boston isn't kind to begin with, and the combination of heat and humidity certainly isn't doing anything for Jane's hair, complexion, or attitude. All of the girls, including Maura, have taken several dips into the pool, and all of the girls, except for Maura, have gotten in splash flights with Brockton or tried to get on his shoulders. Maura tried to speak to him once, outside of the pool. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head at her body, but he didn't seem the least bit interested in what she had to say. Once he'd seen enough of her cleavage to tide him over, he promptly jumped in the water to flirt with someone else, splashing Maura in his haste to get away.
Brushing the droplets off her arms and stomach, she'd gone back to her chair and buried her nose in her magazine.
Jane knows that she'll be eliminated tonight. It's not really a question. Jane's conflicted about it. Maura is the only person she actually likes talking to, not to mention these weird extra feelings, so she'll be kind of devastated when the doctor leaves the mansion. But watching Maura be rejected by people who don't even deserve the right to be near her is more painful than Jane could have imagined. Maybe letting Maura get out of this toxic hellhole will be the best thing, and it's not like Jane can't call her, or hang out with her when this ridiculous assignment is over.
Never seeing Maura again honestly doesn't cross her mind as a possibility of how life could be.
Lost in thought about what it would be like to see Maura outside of this house, when she can be Detective Rizzoli again, Jane doesn't notice anything amiss until a girl screams.
"OH MY GOD! CHLOE!"
Jane's head snaps around, and it takes her only a second to process that one of the girls is floating face down in the pool, her arms and legs spread eagled in the water.
Instantly, several things happen.
More screams fill the air. The closest producer jumps into the water. He and one of the least hysterical girls flip Chloe over and pull her to the edge of the pool. She's not coughing or moving on her own.
Maura leaps out of her chair and is at the side of the pool in a second, helping them pull the limp body out of the water. She and another girl lay her out on her back and Maura kneels next to her, immediately getting to work.
"SHE'S DEAD, OH MY GOD, SHE'S DEAD." Maura ignores the hysterical screams and, for once, her calm façade seems to be helping. Everyone falls silent.
She pulls her own wet hair out of her way, and listens for a breath while she feels for a pulse. Sitting up on her knees, she begins compressing Chloe's chest, rhythmically compressing and compressing. She looks up, making eye contact with a cameraman and a producer. "You, call an ambulance, now. You, bring me the big med kit. Run."
After what feels like forever, Maura stops compressing her chest and quickly runs her hands down Chloe's neck before tilting her head back and beginning mouth-to-mouth.
The sound of techno dance remixes horribly permeates the air. No one has turned it off. Most of the girls are huddled in groups, holding each other and sobbing softly. Brockton and the girl he was having alone time with coming running up and he immediately takes three girls in his arms as he processes what's happening. The cameramen continue to film.
Jane is rooted to the ground.
Mid-way through the second round of chest compressions, something changes. Like a miracle, Chloe starts to cough.
Maura quickly rolls her onto her side, letting Chloe weakly cough out the water onto Maura's legs. With one hand, Maura holds her neck still, and with the other she rubs small circles into Chloe's back. Only now does she start to speak. "That's it, that's it. You're okay. You're okay, mchumba. You're okay. Just keep breathing, okay, Chloe? You're doing great."
As her coughing begins to slow, Maura, still muttering soft reassurances to her, starts intently feeling her neck and head. She looks up at the person closest to her, a girl named Kelly who seems to have kept her head. "I need an unopened bottle of water and two clean towels. Right now." Kelly runs.
The cameraman runs up with the big med kit, and Maura digs in it, pulling out a couple things, but clearly not finding what she wants. She orders him to bring her a magazine off a nearby lounge chair, and she quickly rolls it up to use as a stethoscope for a few seconds. "Okay, mchumba, you're doing great. I need you stay nice and still for me, okay?" Maura keeps speaking softly as she shines a penlight into each of her eyes. She asks Chloe her name and address as she softly manipulates arms and legs, checking for fractures. She has her recite the alphabet while wiggling her fingers and toes and seems satisfied with everything she finds. "Great job, Chloe. You're doing great, you're going to be just fine, mchumba."
Kelly comes back with the towels and water. Maura rolls one up and edges it under Chloe's neck to keep her head still before rolling her onto her back once again. Then she opens the water bottle, and Chloe clearly starts away from it. Maura places a calming hand on her head, and smiles down at her softly. "You're not going to drink it, mchumba. I just need to clean out this cut on your head. Don't worry, okay chu?"
At a soft nod, Maura carefully pours the water onto her forehead, tenderly keeping it out of her eyes. Patting the area dry with the other towel, Maura gently applies butterfly bandages as the paramedics finally run in.
Without even making eye contact, Maura asserts her dominance. Keeping her hands on Chloe, Maura merely says, "I'm Doctor Maura Isles. Concussion, no apparent skull fracturing, and near drowning. Hand me your stethoscope so I can finish my examination." She holds out her hand like a surgeon on TV, and, after the paramedic hesitantly places it in her palm, she quickly listens to Chloe's breathing. "Good job, chu." She smiles at Chloe and then turns to the paramedics, speaking quickly and technically about what she's found. She secures the neck brace on Chloe herself, and then, in a remarkable show of strength, helps them lift her onto the stretcher.
Chloe won't let go of her hand. Maura reaches down and brushes some of Chloe's hair out of her face. "They're just going to take you for some tests, Chloe. You're going to be perfectly fine. You'll be home tomorrow, okay, chu?"
"Thank you," Chloe whispers.
Maura smiles, squeezes her hand, and lets the paramedics wheel her away.
There is a moment of silence.
"Oh my god," a soft voice breaks through. "That was the scariest thing I've ever seen." Soft agreements ripple through the girls as they squeeze each other and wipe their eyes.
Suddenly, Maura looks small and tired, standing alone in the middle of an empty expanse of deck. Jane realizes that she's still in just her bathing suit, covered in regurgitated pool water and faint traces of blood. Jane grabs a robe and goes to bring it over, but a producer pulls it out of her hands. "Brockton. Bring this over to her."
Brockton does as he's told, and Jane tries to keep her feet rooted to the ground, even though every cell in her body is screaming for her to run over to Maura and gather her up and hold her for a couple hours.
Maura accepts the robe, and Brockton steers her over to seat for a private conversation. Jane wrenches her attention away from them and does her best to soothe the other girls and straighten up the deck. Sooner than she expects, she feels a small hand on her back. Straightening up and turning around, she sees Maura. "I'm going to take a shower," the doctor says softly.
Jane reaches up and gently tucks a piece of hair behind Maura's ear. "Do you need anything?"
Maura smiles and leans into the eye contact. "No, thank you." She reaches out and gently touches Jane's hip. "Thank you for the robe."
Jane's eyes widen in surprise, but before she can say anything else, Maura is already gone.
They decide to still have the rose ceremony tonight, which Jane finds insane but unsurprising. All the girls are reserved, but do their best to perform for the cameras and Brockton.
Maura gets the first rose, and she's the only one surprised by it. Brockton makes a big speech about how lucky they all are to have her, and she does her best to look demure and pleased. He video chats Chloe to offer her the second rose and, from her hospital room, she gleefully accepts. The producers nod happily to each other at how well that worked out.
After the roses are given out, and two heartbroken girls leave, the rest swarm around Maura, asking her rapid fire questions about Chloe.
"What actually happened to her?"
"Her injuries are consistent with what I might expect to find from someone who jumped into a pool, hit their head against the bottom or side, and, once unconscious, breathed in a great deal of water."
"Where did you learn to do that?"
"In medical school."
"Have you ever saved anyone before?"
"Yes."
"Was that the scariest thing you've ever seen?"
Maura looks over at Jane in a panic, and she immediately sweeps in, ushering the girls off to their dinner. Maura turns to follow them, but Jane reaches out and grabs her hand. "You okay?" She asks softly.
Maura nods, clearly trying to put her mask back on.
"Hey," Jane says softly, squeezing her hand. When Maura's eyes meet her own, she smiles down at her. "You're a badass, remember?"
Maura chuckles softly and squeezes back once before dropping Jane's hand, squaring her shoulders, and walking resolutely into the dining room.
Later that night, Jane is lying in bed, not quite asleep. The lights are off, but she doesn't need them to see the flashbacks of the day playing on a loop in her head. It's only when images of another body, wracked with pain and abuse, flickers over Chloe's that she rubs her hands over eyes, and it's only when the smell of smoke mixes with chlorine in her memory that she groans, flips on the light, and sits up, scratching her scalp and trying to will her brain to quiet down.
A soft knock at the door has her reaching for her gun before she comes to her senses and calls out, "Come in."
Maura stands hesitantly in the doorway, one hand up on the jamb and the other tucked behind her back. She's wearing a black tank top and gray sweatpants that fall to just below her knees. She's barefoot and looks about ten years younger than Jane has ever seen her.
"Hey." Jane's voice is huskier than usual in the darkness, and Maura shudders softly.
"I, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."
"You didn't."
"I was just…there are other people in our living room, and I, um…"
She's flustered and it's adorable. Jane doesn't miss that she's called it our living room. Ours. Her heart contracts happily while her stomach flips around like a tumbleweed in a windstorm.
"Hey." Softly. "Come in."
Maura gently slips inside and closes the door slowly behind her. She looks around, and Jane belatedly realizes that she's looking for somewhere to sit and has only just now noticed the distinct lack of chair. Jane pulls back the covers and pats the spot next to her.
"Oh, no, I couldn't—"
"It's the bed or the floor, Maur. Come on, don't be an idiot."
Maura eases into the bed, and leans against the wall, mirroring Jane. She plays with her hands. She doesn't make eye contact. She's all tender inside. She's used up every ounce of her courage knocking on the door, and now she's just here. In the bed.
Jane knows. "Big day, huh?"
Maura nods, still looking at her hands.
"First rose."
"Yes." Maura sighs. "First rose."
"You don't sound happy."
She still doesn't look up. "Should I be?"
Jane shrugs. "Most people here would be."
"Most people here wouldn't have gotten it because they adequately performed CPR."
Jane chuckles, stretching her arms over her head for a moment. "No, you're probably the only one in that particular situation. But you didn't just get it because of that."
"Don't. Don't do that." Her voice is sharper than Jane has ever heard it. "Don't lie to me. We both know why I got that rose tonight, and exactly what would have happened if Chloe hadn't hit her head. I'm not an idiot, Jane, and I don't appreciate being condescended or lied to."
Contrition immediately floods Jane. "Shit, Maur, I—you're right. I'm sorry."
Maura reaches over and gently entwines their fingers. "It's alright." Her touch soothes Jane, and they both fall silent, just feeling each other.
After a moment, "Can I tell you something?"
Jane squeezes gently. "Anything."
"I haven't worked on a live patient since I was in Africa."
"Was that why you were calling her, um, what was it?"
"Mchumba, yes. It's 'sweetheart' in Swahili. I'm unaccustomed to comforting injured people in English. It just came out."
"I don't think she minded."
"No, I don't think she did."
The silence is filled with unspoken words. Finally, she can't take it anymore. "What is it, Maur?"
A deep breath. "In Africa, there was a man." Jane's heart plummets. "There was a man, and we were…involved." A beat.
"You loved him."
"Oh, yes. I loved him. And I think he loved me. In a way."
"But not the same way?"
"No. Not the same way." Her voice is thick. Jane's blood rushes around in her body. "He wasn't—he was a wonderful doctor. He is a wonderful doctor. But, he never—well." A deep breath. "He had a lot of opportunities to pick me, to make what we had real, and he didn't."
"I'm so sorry."
"I thought I was over it, that my neurochemical reaction to him had abated. I haven't seen or spoken to him in nearly a year. But today…I don't know. I, um…you know what, never mind." She starts to leave, but Jane holds her hand firmly.
"Wait." Jane reaches over and snaps off the light before scrunching down to lay flat on her back. "Lay down."
"Why?"
"Because it's always easier to say these things laying down in the dark. It's a scientific fact."
"It most certainly is not." But they can both feel the other smiling in the dark.
"Use the scientific method, Maura. Test my hypothesis." But Maura is already sliding down between the sheets. She tucks her right hand under her head, her left easily finding Jane's again.
Staring up at the ceiling, she softly speaks. "When I was with him, when I saved someone I'd go to him and he'd tell me he was proud of me. And if I lost someone, he'd tell me that I'd done my best. He was there for me, each time. And today, when Brockton came over to me, after, for a second, just a split second, I thought it was him. I thought it was Ian. And it wasn't, obviously. And I shouldn't have been disappointed because I came here to forget Ian. And I left Africa because Ian wouldn't love me enough and so I shouldn't miss him or want him or think about him. But I've never…I've never saved someone and not had him to hold me and tell me he was proud of me. And then when Brockton told me that I was 'totally hot' and 'scary impressive,' his words, obviously, I just felt…letdown. Empty."
Jane is running her thumb up and down Maura's. She squeezes, hard. She waits a few moments, until she knows her voice will stay steady. "I don't know Ian, but I know that if he picked the job, or his freedom, or whatever bullshit he called it, over you, then he's an idiot. He's an idiot, Maura, because you're incredible. You're passionate, and sweet, and incredibly strong, and you're breathtaking, and you're—you're just this incredible person. And if he wasn't smart enough to see that, then he's an idiot. And a douchebag. And you can do so much better. I know you can, and I know you will. With Brockton or with…whoever.
"And what you did today was totally badass. If you hadn't been there, Chloe would have died, and I know that for a fact. You saved her life today, and I'm not going to tell you that I'm proud of you because that feels, I don't know, condescending, I guess. And I'm not going to call you scary impressive because I'm not afraid of you, but I will tell you that I'm absolutely in awe of what you did today. You were this unbelievable mix of professional badass and, like, soft caretaker, and I had no idea that was even possible. I'm in awe of you, Maura, and I just wish you knew how awesome you are."
Jane politely pretends not to notice Maura wiping her face or shaking the bed softly when her breath catches.
After some minutes in silence, Maura rolls onto her left side and gently tucks herself into Jane's space. Jane, without even thinking, matches her movement, putting them face to face with a few inches of air between them as she lays her arm over Maura's waist.
When she's about sixty percent asleep, Maura's small voice pulls her back.
"Jane?"
"Yeah?"
"That wasn't anywhere near the scariest thing I've ever seen."
The smell of scorched earth, the screams of a child, the feeling of her own blood pouring down her body. Jane shudders and pulls Maura in flush against her, banishing the memories and overloading her senses with softness.
"Me neither."
Maura sighs and relaxes, her body melting into Jane's. "Goodnight, Jane."
"Goodnight, mchumba." Jane feels Maura smile against her chest as she drops a kiss on her head. "Sleep well."
