About a month after the Black Prom, I was approached by Mrs. Ross about Tommy's memorial service. She asked me to speak about him at the service and I agreed. I didn't, however, mention the fact I was pregnant. I couldn't.

I showed up for the day of the service. There all of Tommy's family and few of the other survivors of that night. I hadn't seen them since graduation about a month ago.

"Sue!" Mrs. Ross called out. "Oh I'm so glad you could be here." She hugged me. She backed up noticing my small baby bump. "You're not…."

"Three months I said" touching my little girl. She looked stunned.

"why didn't we know about this" she said referring to her husband.

"I wasn't sure if you'd want to know-"

"of course we wanted to know! Honey, it's our grandchild! It is Tommy's right?" she asked

"yes of course it's Tommy's" he was the only guy I'd ever had slept with of course it was his.

With every person who spoke I become more and more unsable.

I don't think I am going to be able to get the words out. It's too painful to think about.

"Tommy was my best friend. We met after our 8th grade dance. It's weird thinking the kid with braces I met that night would soon be the man I fell in love with. It's hard summing up someone's impact on your life in word when they've made such a strong influence on you. I'm a better person because I knew Tommy. He taught me to make good decisions, he taught me how to love, how to make allowances for others. I never knew I could love someone so much till I met him. I miss Tommy everyday. I see him in everything I do."

I start crying, bawling, rather than just tearing up. And I see the faces staring back at me begin to cry as well. I set my hand on little baby bump. Only about three months it's not big but it's there.

"I'd give anything to hear his voice one more time. I'd give anything for just five last minutes with him. I'd give anything if he could meet his daughter" I rubbed where I felt her laying. "I know Tommy would've been there for me through this. No doubt in my mind he would be amazing father." This is a rough subject and tears will not stop flowing. "I'm sorry" I apologized for my inability to hold myself together. I wipe away tears. "there's no doubt in my mind that I would have married him" I looked up as tears fell. " love you so much tommy."

Those words in no way did how much I loved Tommy justice.

***after the service***

"sue, dear," it was Mrs. Ross again. I turned around a faked a small grin.

"sue, that was beautiful what you said. Tommy really loved you. You were so good for him, I can't imagine our lives these past few years without you in it," I mean Tommy and I were together for almost four years, there were plenty of family outings I had been on with his family getting to know all of them.

"sue we want to be there for you and the baby. We want to be a part of our first grandbaby's life" she slipped me a check.

"no, I cant" trying to give it back.

"I insist"

It was a check for $10,000.

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