Author's Note: Just a short little chapter that I made, because I had to inclued a character I've always liked in Fallout 3 for some reason: Wadsworth! Why? I don't know, he just makes me laugh. The joke that is said by Wadsworth was one I made up (if you don't get it and you really want it explained, let me know). It is the end result of being bored out of my freakin' mind in physics class (which is the bane of my existence!).


Chapter 4 - Wadsworth

The sounds of buzzing and whirling woke Thomas from his deep sleep. His head scraped itself from his pillow as he peered out of his bedroom doorway, the commotion continuing. The sounds of an electric voice could be heard humming. It sounded like it was coming from sort of radio.

"What the hell...?" Thomas groaned. His eyes felt crusted after just waking up. He slumped his arm over to look at his Pip-Boy's clock."Eight fifty-three?" he said, somewhat happy with how long he was able to rest. After yesterday, all he wanted to do was sleep, but the noise downstairs would ruin such an idea. In the end, he was happy with the hours he got.

Filled with reluctance, he roared a great yawn and dragged himself off of his bed and down the steps. The sun's rays sang through the holes and gaps of his walls. Thomas watched his feet slink down the stairs, eyes pried halfway open; the Sandman's sand was still buried deep within his vision.

What stood before him caught him by complete surprise. His morning eyes captured a silver ball with many metallic arms floating around and still humming in its static voice. Its main feature that hooked Thomas was the razor-sharp circular saw on one of its arms. The shiny silver monster had not yet noticed him and Thomas gasped at the thoughts of what was and what if it was sent to kill him from an unknown source.

Catlike, Thomas exploded out of his morning daze and raced for the locker containing his gun. As his footsteps clanked on the metal floor, the intruder spun around just before Thomas flung open the locker.

It slowly drifted towards Thomas. "Ah, young sir, I am honored to meet you!" it spoke in a happy and cheery radio voice, failing to see that Thomas viewed it as hostile.

By now Thomas had his weapon aimed right at what he felt was a yellow bullseye painted on the steel, floating octopus' body. Utter confusion slapped Thomas right across the cheek. "Who or what the hell are you and where are you from?!" he shouted, tightening his grip.

"Oh, please forgive me, young master. I haven't been given the chance to introduce myself. I am Wadsworth, your personal robotic butler. It is a pleasure to be able to serve you!"

"'Wadsworth'? You... you're not sent here to kill me?" Thomas interrogated. He could not avert his eyes from the gleaming saw.

"Kill you? Heavens, no! Sherriff Simms sent me here. Oh, that reminds me! I have a message from him to you."

"A message?" Thomas slowly lowered his weapon, eyes still locked on his reflection on Wadsworth.

"Yes, good sir," Wadsworth said.

The happy English accent disappeared as Wadsworth began to speak in a low and familiar voice. It was Lucas. "Hey, kid. I just wanted to say thanks again for helping us with that bomb! I can't begin to tell you how much easier I can breathe knowing that thing is truly dead. I know I already gave ya some money and a house, but I figured I'd give one last thing of payment. From the Megaton armory, this is 'Wadsworth'. He is here to help you around your new home and to serve you with anything. Take good care of him, and thanks once again!" There was a zipping sound as the message ended.

"Is there anything I can help you with right now, young sir?"

Thomas looked at him and thought about the possibilities. He had the hook, he just needed to catch a fish from the pool of ideas. "Hmm... Can you get me a bottle of wat-"

The quick and swift sound of gears and water drops cut him off. Before Thomas even realized what happened, Wadsworth was holding water encased in a plastic bottle. "Certainly, sir! Here you are!"

Stunned, Thomas was dumbstruck by the speed of his request. "H-how did you do that?"

"Condensation collectors, my good sir. Need anything else?" Wadsworth had nothing but willingness to work.

Thomas was impressed, but still wanted to test him further. He set down the water and questioned, "what is... seven-hundred eighty nine point five divied by the square root of seventeen point three?"

Without a second in between, Wadsworth responded, "One-hundred eighty nine point eight one four three six seven eight...my good sir!"

"Okay..." Thomas playfully nodded, a grin coming along. He was confident that his next challenge would stump the bot. "Tell me a joke!"

There was a slight chuckle from Wadsworth, but he played along. "Two bowling balls are rolling down a hill, and one looks back to find a lonely baseball, sitting at the top of the hill. The bowling looks at the other one and says, 'hey, do you think that baseball could catch up with us?' The other turns to see the baseball and answers, 'maybe. He has potential!' "

As dumb as it was, the pun managed to make a few laughs punch their way through Thomas' mouth. "Heh. Not bad... not bad at all!"

"Need anything else?" Wadsworth asked.

Thomas was out of ideas that would actually have a chance at testing the robot. Alright, he is legit. Thomas smiled, "no thank you. I'm quite alright. Well, Wadsworth! It's a pleasure to have you serving me." He held out his hand, but a thought shot through his head after his hand was already out. Please don't shake with the razor hand! Please don't shake with the razor hand! For the love of God, don't shake with the razor hand!

"But of course!" Wadsworth slightly tilted forward, bowing. "It's what I'm programed to do, afterall, Mr. Allen."

Thomas pulled his hand back. He smiled inside at the thought that there is now something that actually takes orders from him. Thomas had survived the childhood struggle and frustration of doing what others told him to do. Now he felt it was his turn to be the boss. This was great for Thomas now that a window of opportunities exploded open for him.

"Please, call me Thomas." He headed for the door and turned back to Wadsworth. "I want to go walk around Megaton for a bit. just stay here and do whatever. I'll be back in a few hours."

"Of course, young sir! Don't let me keep you! I'll tidy up the place while you are out and about. Farewell!" the butler yelled, waving his arm with the razor circular saw.

Thomas waved back, shutting the door. The sun was now blazing above him, and its warming rays felt good on Thomas' skin. Megaton's rusted houses and buildings greeted their new hero. The smile on his face soon morphed into a look of confusion. "Tidy up?" he muttered, glancing back to the door. But I just moved in... there's nothing to tidy up!

Stumbled on the thought, Thomas decided to just shrug it off and walk down the ramp.