AN – there seems to be a bit of bad language in this chapter … Ooops

Chapter Four

"You guys ok with the change in plans?" Jack asked,

"Sure,"

"Yes sir,"

"Of course O'Neill,"

Jack smiled proudly at his team and they basked in the praise – until Daniel rolled his eyes,

"Come on we better book our plane tickets,"

"Ah!" Jack said and Sam picked up on his thought immediately,

"Teal'C doesn't have a passport," she said,

"Oh," Daniel frowned. Teal'C didn't know what they were talking about – the alien barely left the SGC he certainly hadn't left the country.

"A passport is a little booklet with a portrait and a few personal details. Governments use them to control people coming into and going from a country." the archaeologist explained,

"They are not easy to get?"

"Err no it's a long process,"

"I will not be able to accompany you then," Teal'C said,

"I'm sorry Teal'C," Daniel said,

"Ok Sam you wanna see about getting us tickets?" Jack said,

"Yes sir,"

"We'll bring you back a souvenir,"

"What is a souvenir?"

"A present, which usually represents where a family or friend has been on holiday," Daniel explained,

"I see . . . I would like the DVD box set collation of Carry On movies," Sam and Daniel stopped what they were doing and stared at him in shock. Jack grinned and said,

"Good choice T,"

There was a moment of stillness as Teal'C stood proud to have surprised his Earth friends, Jack enjoyed his younger teammates shock and they played through the aliens' words again.

"No the whole point is that its something you can't get in this country and the gift is supposed to be a surprise," Daniel complained,

"Where did you hear about the Carry On movies?" Sam asked unable to let that pass,

"Major Annie Nolan-Smith suggested them for me," Teal'C said,

"The little quiet one from SG-8?" Jack asked raising a surprised eyebrow,

"Indeed,"

"You think you know a person," the colonel muttered trying to imagine the short, often sullen, woman watching the rude old comedies.

"Ok sir, there are three seats available on a direct flight leaving Denver in three hours arrives at London's Heathrow tomorrow lunchtime."

"Are we going to make that?" Daniel asked sceptically; the journey was an hour and forty normally but they were sure to hit traffic.

"That's the last flight today," Sam said urgently,

"Book …" Jack was interrupted by Daniels phone ringing,

"Heeelloooo," Jack said,

"Jack!" Daniel complained,

"Yes sir, really?" Jack waved an arm at Sam, who paused,

"I see, that's great, thank you sir," Jack hang up and smiled at his team,"

"General Hammond has got our journey – leaving in an hour from Fort Carson with the 10th specials."

"They're travelling to London?"

"I didn't think to ask …" Jack pouted thoughtfully and then shrugged,

"It's free and leaving tonight. We can make plans for our return while we're there."

"Does this mean Teal'C can come?" Daniel asked,

"…" Jack picked up Daniels phone again,

"General Sir, could we get a passport over there for Teal'C by Sunday?" Jack holds the phone away from his ear for a bit,

"Yes sir I realise that … yes sir … thank you sir," hanging up Jack smiled,

"Yea the General is going to organise a passport to be sent to the embassy for Monday – but we're needed back Wednesday at the latest, ready for our next mission Friday."

"Thank you O'Neill," Teal'C was excited at not only leaving the base but also travelling to a different part of the planet, not that anyone outside of SG-1 would see it.

The four gathered their bags – Daniel now that he wouldn't have as much free time decided against taking numerous books. Daniel closed his office door and they walked at a steady pace to the elevators and up to the outside world. General Hammond was waiting by the signing in/out station. He handed Jack a folder,

"Colonel Chris Flynn is taking forty of his men to train with British Special Forces this summer. He's agreed to let your team travel with them but don't expect a warm welcome."

"Yes sir,"

"The British will be expecting you but they're not happy about it. You'll be removed from their base fairly quickly I expect but I've arranged for a friend to meet you – all the information you need is in that folder. I took the liberty of telling him the situation …" Jack had looked like he was going to interrupt but George raised a hand stopping him,

"The world may or may not know about the Stargate programme but they definitely know we're not alone," he said mysteriously and then he hurried them along,

"Go on then,"

They got into the second elevator and rode in silence until Jack burst,

"What did he mean?"

"I think he meant they know about aliens' sir?" Sam answered a confused frown,

"That's what I thought," Jack shook his head.

Everyone was silent the rest of ride up and after they passed the numerous check desks they headed to Jacks car. Teal'C joined Jack in the front while Sam and Daniel squeezed in the back. The journey was only fifteen minutes but Jack made it in ten; hurtling round the empty but bendy Norad Road at great speeds and then slightly slower down the straight civilian roads; O'Connell Boulevard, Chiles Avenue and Prussman Avenue. Sam had directed him via the information from General Hammond to where four army trunks stood waiting in a line, filled with tall, broad-shouldered all male soldiers. Colonel Flynn was waiting by a van in front of them,

"Colonel O'Neill? Join the convey – we're flying from Peterson at exactly sixteen hundred hours," he said getting straight to business and as soon as he finished talking, got back into the van.

"Sir, Yes sir," Jack said to himself and more slowly got back into his car. He barely had a chance to shut his door before the convey set off. While following he checked his car clock – 15:36.

Twenty minutes later they arrived at the City of Colorado Springs Municipal Airport. They drove around to the north where the air force base was and parked. SG-1 grabbed their bags as Colonel Flynn marched his soldiers onto the C-40 Clipper military transport plane. Jack hurried his team on worried they'd be left behind. Colonel Flynn was standing in front as the soldiers put their bags away and sat down at the front of the upper 'troop' deck. The process was near silent and took five minutes.

SG-1 were sitting several rows back and feeling distinctly unwelcome. The soldiers started talking and joking amongst themselves and Colonel Flynn spoke to several off them on his way to talk to them,

"So General Hammond didn't tell me much; I don't know what you folks get up to over at Norad or what you're doing over in London and I don't wanna." The colonels' words were stern but his voice was mild,

"Ok," Jack said,

"I spoke to the Brits and they aren't pleased about your visit, not that they said as much, reserved bastards that they are,"

"Ok," Jack said again,

"I don't suppose George had time to give you much information about the flight?"

"No,"

"We're refuelling in North East Canada in about five hours and then it's another five hours onto England arriving at an undisclosed base local time at thirteen hundred hours Friday. George said a friend of his would meet you when we land?"

"Yes,"

"Well I don't know how he knows where to go but again I assume that's above my pay grade," Then the colonel actually smiled at them,

"I've told my men to try and sleep before we refuel we'll be adjusting to the local time as soon as we arrive. I'll ask you not to disturb them then but otherwise mingle or whatever – I'll be up front with the pilot for most of the journey, Major James Calvert will see to anything you need," the colonel indicated to the smiling freckled red-haired man standing next to him.

"Thank you colonel," Jack said as the man left,

"Colonel O'Neill it's a pleasure to have you on board," the man said with a strong southern accent and warm smile. Like most of the men on board he was almost the size of Teal'C.

"Thanks I was beginning to think we weren't welcome,"

"You weren't!" Major Calvert said with a massive grin luckily SG-1 laughed.

"So we land at one o'clock?" Daniel asked checking with Sam,

"No we land at thirteen hundred hours Danny," Jack corrected. Daniel just rolled his eyes.

After about an hour everyone was settled and resting and SG-1 did the same. If they had to leave on Tuesday they had little time to relax. Even if they found this Lytton guy and he told them everything they wanted to know that day or the next, they would surely still need a couple of days to . . . well plans would be completely reliant on what he told them. Jack, Sam and Daniel slept and dreamt of the possibilities. Teal'C went without Kel-no-reem deciding it was too alien to do in public and the sound of the plane was distracting.

As the plane landed in Canada the soldiers shared breakfast with them and then left them alone while the team went through the very short file General Hammond had given them.

"So we have a photo of Colonel Flynn, a printed copy of the magazine image and here a couple of pages on the Generals friend – Brigadier Timothy Hodges. He's seventy-six and retired ten years ago. Still keeps up with the General and other contacts around the world. General Hammond warns us he'll likely know all … all about who we really are and what we do!" Sam reported soundly shocked,

"Even the best of friends spy on each other," Jack said neutrally,

"But does this mean the Brits know about the SGC?" she asked,

"I wouldn't be surprised hell if China or Russia didn't know I'd find it amazing."

"Really sir?"

"Yes Carter. What else does it say?"

"Not much he's listed Brigadier Hodges medals there's over twenty here but no mention of what they're for or ... Sir! He's got an air force cross!"

"Damn I've been after one of those for years!" Jack said jokingly,

"You probably have several that you can't tell us about don't you?" Daniel teased,

"Daniel if I can't tell you I've got them how can I answer that question?" Jack asked innocently,

"It's a rare enough award for Americans to get let alone foreigners," Sam mused interrupting her friends' banter,

"Well we knew this guy must be good otherwise George wouldn't have asked him to help us," Jack said happy about the change in subject.

There was nothing else in the file so they made a brief plan of action – 'meet Brigadier Hodges, find Lytton Mercer, ask him about the photo and make him help them'. As Jack said it didn't have to be a good plan.

After that the team quickly started up a conversation about the recent Christmas blockbuster Shakespeare in Love. Soldiers, passing on the way to the toilet, joined in and called their friends over. They didn't ask about NORAD or what they were doing on their visit and in return SG-1 didn't ask about their training. Teal'C was mostly silent (even more than usual) listening intently to everything. The only people he had really talked to were members of the SGC who understood he was an alien and treated him with a remoteness they probably weren't aware of. He always felt alone and isolated at the SGC – even with his teammates though that was fading. The men on this plane (obviously) treated him like he was born on Earth and while a lot of the flight this left him confused it felt like he was finally fitting in.

Daniel was nervous and also quiet. He spent most of the long flight reading a giant book. His experience with military men was not great until after they found out how much he had contributed to the Stargate Programme (or Jack found out). After more than two years working at the SGC Daniel remained weary of new soldiers since they often tormented him. Today though his scholarly personality produced curious looks but no questions or teasing for which he was grateful.

Sam was never one for letting others make her feel isolated. Jack introduced her with her rank and she strove to remain professional – even when some of the men made crude jokes about London red light districts. Being around a group of young enthusiastic soldiers reminded her of her training; before she started working as a scientist and at the SGC. It was peace time and these soldiers had no fear of war or battles. Everybody at the SGC was on edge: always waiting for the next mission to go wrong, for colleagues to die or not come back.

Jack … well Jack was Jack he acted like a teenager and one of the lads. Many of the young men did a double take when they saw his rank. When they saluted him he waved them off and told a joke. All through acting relaxed and playful he was puzzling though the images, Lytton Mercer and what he was going to do when they landed. He considered General Hammonds words about the world knowing about aliens and George's retired friend; SG-1 wouldn't share any information with him Jack knew that but would the guy ask questions? That would be awkward. The old guy was a friend of George's and doing them a favour after all.

As they began to descend Colonel Flynn came out the cockpit and sat with them. He joked that the British base commander had nearly made them wear blindfolds so they couldn't see where they were. It was a non-subtle warning about how unwelcome they would be upon landing. He was right.

After a perfect touchdown the Tenth Special Forces Group gathered their bags and followed Major Calvert off the plane. Colonel Flynn and SG-1 followed moving slowly. They were met by three men – two of whom were holding rather large guns. The one in the middle stepped forward,

"I'm Major General David Whittaker. You must be Colonel Flynn and the stowaways." There was no sign of emotion in his voice at all,

"Major General Whittaker, sir, it's an honour to meet you. I apologise again for the short notice of our guests however they are amongst the most senior members of the US air force as I'm sure you found out when you tried to stop them from travelling," the Major General's lips twitched though whether in annoyance or amusement no one could tell,

"Lance Corporal Nat Thatcher and Private Nigel Lawson will escort you straight off the base as arranged. Your guard is waiting by the gate. When you leave you will be required to sign a form disavowing all knowledge of anything you may see here. Failure to sign will result in you being shot." The two men stepped forward and gestured (with their very large guns) to the right.

"Well it's just be dandy meeting you, what, what, goodbye," Jack said in a passable English accent. Daniel and Sam both winced but nobody else reacted (although Jack would always swear the Private grinned). Jack made sure to look around as much as possible (and very obviously) during the short trip from the plane to the gate; Daniel stared at the ground while Teal'C and Sam made no effort to change how they would normally walk. The only thing Jack noted of possible interest was two personnel dressed in all black with scarlet berets. He didn't recognise the uniform and they were too far away to make any further observations.

They signed their forms easily and Private Lawson walked them to a second gate and pointed over to where an elderly man sat waiting in his car. As they approached he slowly got out his car,

"Ah you must be …" he stared at them thoughtfully before correctly guessing;

"Major Sam Carter … Colonel Jack O'Neill … Teal'C and Doctor Daniel Jackson." If his gaze lingered longest of Teal'C no one was going to bring it up

"Brigadier Timothy Hodges any friend of General Hammond etc, etc," Jack chirped,

"George said you had an interesting way of communicating,"

"It's been a long flight but we're eager to get started. Your assistance is very much appreciated – do you know where we might find Lytton Mercer?" Daniel spoke rapidly … before Jack could,

"And he said you'd be the one to smooth any bite marks, yes Doctor Jackson I know where you might find Mr Mercer though why you want to speak to him I haven't been able to figure out." There was a hint of a question that SG-1 ignored as they loaded into the rather small car. Teal'C in particular found it difficult squashed between Daniel and Sam in the backseat as he was,

"I'm sorry you Americans are used to rather larger cars aren't you still it might have been easier if Mr Teal'C was sat in the front." When no one moved to change the old man sighed and set off.

Though hard to believe the Brigadier was actually a worse driver than Jack – twice as fast and nearly blind to boot.

"Now it's nearly a two hour drive you all ok?"

"We're fine sir," Sam replied her right arm tightly pressed against her body holding the door left arm gripping her trousers,

"Now Doctor Carter I'm no sir, not anymore, please call me Timmy,"

"Of course thank you Ti…Timmy,"

"Now then it's a rather long trip … are you sure you'll be alright … you don't want to change seats?" if there was a hint of pleading in his voice it might have been because Jack was rigidly gripping the door with his left hand and his seat with the other, very quietly humming the American national anthem.

"No we're good,"

"I'm fine,"

"Indeed,"

Sam, who never travelled with Jack unless absolutely necessary, was going white and kept squeezing her eyes shut. Daniel looked uncomfortable but was reading another book and grabbing onto Jack's seat when they swung round a corner. Teal'C was rigidly staring out the front window but occasionally something would catch his attention and he would swiftly turn his head to try and get a better look. Brigadier … Timmy spoke non-stop throughout the entire journey; he'd lose his train of thought and start over again, he would turn to stare at one of them taking his eyes off the road for a lot longer than was safe and he completely ignored other road users, road signs and speed limits.

In fact the entire hour and forty-five minutes spent in that car SG-1 decided was one of the most unpleasant experiences of their lives. When he parked at a train station they got out on shaky legs and vowed no matter what they would not be getting back in again,

"Thought we'd take the train from here – traffic in London is just atrocious!" Timmy smiled with a twinkle in his eyes. Jack had a suspicious feeling he had driven like a lunatic for a reason but couldn't fathom what that might be,

"Great,"

"Thank god,"

"Right this way," the world's worst driver strode with surprising speed into the station.

The sign said 'WEST DRAYTON STATION' and Daniel nodded in recognition from the back of the group,

"So where exactly in London is Lytton Mercer?" he asked Timmy as the pensioner handed tickets to each of them,

"Chiswick, don't lose these they last all week," after he answered he looked hard at the team as if they was something he wanted to add … something he though was interesting about that location … but in the end he waved them over towards the queue at the barriers.

"So we get into Paddington on this train and then get a on district line heading south?" he asked and pointed to a map he had picked up when his team turned to wonder how he knew,

"Actually we'll just get off the stop before Paddington and get on a south bound district line from there. Save us about half an hour!" Daniel poured over the map as they queued to get through the ticket barriers and nodded when he found the alternative route,

"The delayed fifteen-oh-nine train to London Paddington will arrive on Platform two in one minute calling at Hays & Harlington, Ealing Broadway and London Paddington a buffet service is available on this train," the loud speakers announced,

"Oh good a late train that actually benefits us come along quickly now," the spire old man sprinted up some stairs across and down with SG-1 following behind, Daniel falling further behind (as he was, as always, carrying the most). The train was pulling in as the archaeologist made it down the stairs and he quickly found himself shoved aside as people spewed out and pushed past him.

"Urgh I thought the English were well-mannered," he complained when he finally caught up with the others. Jack and Sam laughed and Timmy frowned,

"Yes sorry about that I'm afraid all the schools get out about now and it's only the old fuddy duddies like me who have that what you do you call it? Old fashioned quaintness?"

"I didn't mean to be rude," Daniel said blushing,

"No offence taken I assure you there have been many a time I've complained about today's' must-get-there-yesterday society," he was still musing about the good-old-days as the train pulled into Ealing Broadway.

"I took the liberty of booking you a couple of hotel rooms here so you could put your stuff away without too much hassle. Heathrow airport is just below us on the Piccadilly line your passes will get you there by tube or it's an easy taxi journey."

"Thank you,"

"You're welcome I thought you might want to freshen up,"

"Great,"

"It's just out the station and to the left – here I printed off your booking details," Timmy handed them over,

"I just have somewhere to be: meet you back here in an hour? That should be right around closing time."

"Ok great . . ." the retired brigadier had already wondered off. As they stood and watched him head back to the tube a crowd surged past them bumping into them and even Teal'C found himself swept along a step or two.

"Oh!" Daniel cried in frustration as he was sent flying,

"I really don't like travelling here!" he grumbled,

"Come on lets dump our bags that'll help and try moving with the flow," Jack said good naturedly.

An hour later they were back waiting in the same spot. Daniel stood with his back against the wall as unbelievably the station was even more crowded and the whole team were fed up of the announcer listing all the delayed trains. Timmy appeared with a folder held tightly in his arms though somehow the crowd seemed to avoid him,

"There we are then. Checking in went well I trust?" Jack recognised his own trade-mark smirk on the mans face,

"After we changed from two doubles to two twins, yeah it all went swell," he kept the annoyance out of his voice but Timmy reacted with an even better performance,

"Oh dear I'm so sorry they must have misheard me over the phone."

Back on the underground Daniel stayed as close to his teammates as he could without physically touching them. In the three minute journey the linguist gave directions to two different groups (in two different languages) and nearly missed getting off when a pretty German girl struck up a conversation.

Jack and Sam laughed as he squeezed out the closing doors.

"Guys!" he moaned.

Timmy walked them straight to the photo shop and then left them again,

"Got to take this folder somewhere: you know your way back to your hotel room I presume? Good. Call me if you need anything else," handing over a card with nothing on it but a mobile number, he disappeared in a crowd.

"Hi I'm Kenny how can I help?" a young guy with a ponytail asked in a bored tone as they walked through the glass door,

"We're looking for Lytton Mercer," Jack asked, Kenny pointed with both hands to a tall guy with thick glasses, long hair and a hard rock band t-shirt.

"He's with a customer right now. If I can't help maybe Artie can," Kenny pointed to another shop worker staring out the window chewing gum. When he heard his name he looked up and waved but made no attempt to move closer. Jack looked between the two stoned workers and blinked,

"We'll wait," he said. Kenny shrugged and wondered out behind the counter to fiddle with a camera. Artie was still by the window when Lytton finished with his customers,

"Sorry guys its five twenty we're closing now – you'll have to comeback tomorrow if you want pictures developed," Lytton said,

"We're here about a picture you've already developed," Jack said,

"Oy Kenny what've you done now?"

"Nothin' I swear!"

"Oh shit – Lytton that bitch is back," as he shouted Artie ran from the window to the staff room immediately followed by Kenny just as the door slammed open,

"I said I wanted matte not glossy and three copies of this film not this one where's that guy who served me before?" an angry woman barked as she marched across to stand between Jack and Lytton,

"Ma'am I'm sorry I'm the only one here right now and its near closing time could you come back tomorrow and I'll be able to help you out then?"

"I'll be back tomorrow but I'll expect everything to be correct look I've written down instructions on this bit of paper – think you can manage to follow them?"

"Yes ma'am I'll get this sorted for you right away," Lytton kept his voice meek and apologetic and the scary lady nodded and stormed out. Jack blinked and reached out to stop Lytton disappearing,

"Hey we were talking here!" he said feeling exasperated,

"Just a sec, Kenny you useless sack of shite!" the pony tailed man poked his head out and sighed when he realised she was gone,

"Woman scares me more'n her daughter," he said,

"Just get this right man!" Lytton passed the carrier bag over and Kenny disappeared again,

"Sorry about that. Did my worthless assistant Kenny screw up one of your pictures?" Before Jack could answer he continued,

"If that reprobate Artie took a picture of your daughter or pretty lady friend there I'm sorry, one more time and I said I'd call the cops . . ."

"It's about this picture!" Jack interrupted and Sam handed Lytton the print out of his picture in the magazine,

"What about it? I didn't steal it!" Jack stared at him,
"I swear must have been . . ." before the man could blame an employee Jack tapped his finger against Lytton's name printed by the side of the image,

"Alright you got me I stole that image but it's not like it was copyrighted or nothing and after the way that cow treated me I thought you know why the hell not . . ."

"What cow?"

"The one that was just here her and her daughter are always in here shouting about how rubbish we are – I know Kenny and Archie are a pair of imbeciles but I really try – I'm polite, I get everything right 'cept that time I got drunk but that was just once ok,"

"That lady that was just in here? It was her picture?" Jack shouted in surprise,

"Yeah I've had some right pictures off her recently, her daughter sends her phone pics well they must be manipulations really but she don't know how to print 'em off right so she just thrusts the whole phone at me then stands over me while I print 'em like I'm gonna thieve her phone or read her messages or som'int,"

"What's her name?"

"Mrs Noble … ironic right? Err … don't know her first name . . . I think her daughters' name is Diana or something. They got a sweet old guy, Wilfred he's come in a few times – calms her down when she's yelling . . ." half way through his sentence SG-1 left and look for the woman but she had gone.

AN – Sorry for bringing SG-1 to London: I hate it when authors take a British show abroad (it always feels like a weird sort of Mary-Sue) but come on this is Doctor Who: the centre of all of time and space . . .

WC – 4816