When she woke up to the blaring alarm beside her, it hit her like a tidal wave the events of last night. In the past she had found that things never seemed as bad the next morning but in this case, it almost felt worse. She didn't want to go to work, she didn't want to face him, she would have given anything to just turn the alarm off and fall back to sleep. Unfortunately she didn't have that option and people's lives depended on her getting up.

The entire car ride was spent going over the speech in her head. The one she was going to march right in there and deliver to Cragen. No turning back, Elliot had made it quite clear things between them were irreversible. In a perfect world she would make it to work before Elliot and therefore wouldn't have to face him.

As she walked through the doors of the station she held her breath, she didn't even look to see who was in yet. She made a complete beeline to Cragen's office, she would push people over if they stood in her way.

She had made little to no effort today, her hair was pulled into a messy ponytail and her make up was minimal. She was dressed in jeans and a hoodie. A casual and careless outfit, she had more important things on her mind.

She had actually made it to Cragen's door without any hindrance, it was miracle. Just as she raised her hand to knock on the glass she heard him.

"Olivia wait." Elliot's voice, although nearly a whisper, echoed through the station.

He had to be kidding himself. He had come up behind her, ran even to get to her in time and her hand wavered in the air. He rounded to face her and she took in his appearance, he looked pale, drained and unshaven. A part of her took enjoyment in that, another part of her was just angry. She didn't answer him, or question his abrupt request for her to stop, she just waited leaving the ball in his court, mostly because she didn't have anything to say.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" he whispered.

"I think you said enough last night." Her voice was low.

He glanced around to see if anyone was paying attention to them, "Please, just two minutes."

"No." She said directly folding her arms.

"Olivia…" he tried.

"I have to speak to Cragen." She informed him.

"Just give me two minutes, then you can talk to Cragen all you like." His words were frank, yet his eyes were somewhat troubled.

She weakened, sighing, "Two minutes." She said through gritted teeth, hating herself for giving in. He nodded and led the way, taking her out past the lockers and towards the weight room. She had visions of it becoming their venting room, the place they go to unleash the tension they couldn't do so in public.

As he closed the door behind her she glanced over, noting the table he had backed her up against last time they were in here. She swallowed.

He cleared his throat and she looked over at him, she almost felt as if she were caught in the act, busy reminiscing when there were bigger fish to fry. Suddenly it was hot in here.

"Ok, look I'm sorry." He began and immediately she was taken aback, she wasn't expecting an apology.

"I was a prick last night, I was completely out of line and I'm sorry." He gave her earnestly.

She couldn't hide the surprise from her features. She went to say something but he continued.

"I didn't mean what I said," he began and she noticed he wasn't looking at her anymore, "you know my reasoning for…" his words trailed off and his eyes flicked back to hers, hoping that her expression would reflect she knew what he was talking about. He wasn't getting off that easy. She gave him a confused look. "I didn't kiss you to get back at Kathy." He summarized abruptly and it clicked. He looked as if he was about to continue so she stopped him.

"Elliot, look it's fine, I don't want to discuss this." She folded her arms, "Whatever happened, it doesn't matter."

"Ok but I just want to make it clear that-"

"Elliot I don't think we should be partners anymore." She cut him off mid sentence.

His features softened. "Liv," his was face etched with concern, "If this is about last night then-"

"No, it's not just last night. It's everything Elliot, I just think given the past week, if we keep going the way we are, we're going to rip each other to shreds." She swallowed, she couldn't believe what she was suggesting. It was one thing rehearsing it in on her way here, but it was another saying it out loud.

"Ok, I know things are… a mess between us, but it's been one week, you can't just give up." He was almost begging her.

"Elliot, we can't get through two minutes without fighting, we have a job to do and it's suffering."

"Ok so let's not let it, we can just put all this behind us and concentrate on work. We are partners for a reason, we make a good team, Cragen would have split us up already if he didn't think we could handle it." He pressed, "Eight years Olivia, don't throw it all away."

"You're acting like all this is my fault, I'm not the one throwing it away Elliot, you already did. I wasn't the one who through a failed marriage, took it out on you, treated you like shit and crossed a huge line when you…" She didn't even want to say it.

"Ok, I'm sorry, I'm responsible for it all, I've been going through hell at home and I shouldn't have brought it to work. I promise it ends here. I've already lost my house, my kids and my wife, don't take this away from me too."

She chewed on her lip, trying to figure out what he meant by that statement, don't take away the job, or her. It was strange seeing him grovel, she wasn't used to it and it was unnerving. She felt a lot more comfortable when he was strong and in control.

"One comment Elliot," she began folding her arms, "One off centre comment and we're through." She was weak, weak when it came to him.

"Ok." He said softly and suddenly it was awkward.

She nodded, looking away wondering if she had made the biggest mistake of her life. She was so determined to end this today and now she had almost signed her rights over to him. She turned to walk out and just as she reached for the door he grabbed her upper arm softly and pulled her around to face him.

"Thank you." He said softly and she didn't pull quickly from his grasp like she should have, she let him hold her under his grip until it loosened and finally fell away.

"Let's get back to work." She said changing the subject and he nodded, stepping forward and opening the door for her, drawing close enough for her to smell his aftershave, a smell she would recognize anywhere as his. The one thing he managed to apply this morning.

She swallowed, knowing that as much as Elliot promised to be on his best behavior, for her there was no go going back after this week. The fighting, the insults, the anger was one thing, but the weight room, the couch, that kiss was a lot harder to put aside.

He had stepped under a light and she saw for the first time the small slightly purple bruise that rimmed underneath his left eye. That stab of guilt resurrected as she studied it, squinting. She had an overwhelming feeling to reach out and smooth her finger over the bruise, but she refrained.

She opted for an apology instead, "I'm sorry for hitting you." She said quietly.

"I deserved it." He said his eyes still on her, his hand still holding the door for her.

She made no motion to leave, a part of her didn't want to. She knew once they left the confines of the weight room anything from the past would no longer up for discussion, they would start afresh. Her mouth made motions to say something but she stopped herself, realizing there was nothing left to say.

She cleared her throat and broke the eye contact and as she turned she felt him lightly touch her arm.

"Liv." She closed her eyes, she was trying to be strong here and he wasn't helping.

Moments from turning back to him Fin rounded the corner, taking in the two of them. Elliot's hand on her arm.

"Olivia," he called out to her as if he'd been looking for her. "Phone call for you." He told her, his gaze shifting to Elliot questionably. Elliot dropped his hand from her.

"Some guy from the Mickey Mouse club?" He gave her a confused look. She didn't even turn back then, she was following Fin back to her desk and in that moment she remembered her priority shouldn't be Elliot, it should be her job.

#####

"Great thank you, I appreciate it." She told the person on the other line as Elliot made his way back to their desks. She hung up and turned to her computer, Elliot's eyes were on her.

"Good news?" He asked wearily.

She nodded, chewing on her lip. "Yeah, I finally got them to release the membership list. The way they were acting it was like it was the deeds to the city." She shook her head.

He nodded.

She logged into her email and clicked on the attachment, the list popping up on her computer. She scrolled down. Her eyes narrowing at the sight.

"Great." She mumbled, clicking the print icon.

"What?" He questioned her sudden mood change.

"87 pages." She rubbed her eyes. "Who would have thought there would be that many members?"

Cragen had informed them that there was a disturbance at the Mickey Mouse Fan Club. Olivia had requested the membership department provide a list of all members over the age of 20 and it was now her task to run them through the violent crimes database.

#####

It was getting later in the afternoon and Olivia was bordering on exhausted. She'd barely slept last night and it was hitting her now. Elliot had gone out to get them some coffee and a late lunch when Olivia looked up at the blonde woman who had just entered the station.

Her stomach dropped, it was Kathy. She had walked straight up to her, carrying a stack of documents and a scowl.

"Where's Elliot?"

"Ah hi Kathy." Olivia greeted her somewhat awkwardly after her abrupt arrival. "He's just getting us a bite to eat."

Her features hardened and Olivia wished she had chosen her words more carefully. 'He is getting a bite to eat.'

She pulled a document from her grasp and tossed it onto Olivia's desk, causing papers to scatter about.

"See that he gets this would you." She said coldly. Then without another word, she was turning and walking straight out the door she had entered.

Olivia looked over to Munch who was giving her a concerned and surprised look. She returned his confusion and got up quickly, knowing she couldn't leave it like this.

Kathy was a fast woman, she wasted no time getting to her car, Olivia quickened the pace to a light jog and made it just in time.

"Kathy, wait." She called out on the street, before the blonde had the door open. She reluctantly turned to Olivia's call. "What's going on?" She asked naively, not knowing where to start.

She almost laughed, "Don't play innocent Olivia."

"Kathy, I don't know what's happening between you and Elliot, but believe me, I have no involvement whatsoever."

Kathy smiled, it wasn't a pleasant smile, she could see the anger behind her eyes.

"No involvement? Are you really going to stand there and lie to my face?" She said with a condescending glare.

"I'm not lying." She said with honestly and a little annoyance.

"Save it Olivia." She said pulling her car door open.

Olivia stepped forward, grabbing the door before she could get in.

"Do you want to fill in the blanks for me Kathy because I have no idea what you're talking about?"

"I don't have time for this, enjoy my husband." She said bitterly turning.

"You're being ridiculous, are you really accusing me of what I think you are?"

Kathy turned back, "I hope it was worth it."

Olivia frowned, "Kathy, there is nothing going on between Elliot and I!" She nearly yelled. "Do you have some sort of evidence that I'm not aware of?" Olivia yelled.

Kathy gave Olivia a victorious smile, like she had just asked the million dollar question.

"Enough Olivia, he already confessed so you can stop with this doe eyed naivety." Kathy looked away in anger.

"He what? What exactly did he confess?" Her awkwardness was replaced with anger.

"What do you think Olivia? That he's fucking you. So excuse me if I'm not buying your little innocent act, maybe you two should have gotten your stories straight."

"Kathy, I don't know why Elliot would say that, it's not true." Olivia almost pleaded.

"Don't patronize me Olivia, you've done enough." Her words were weaker and Olivia sucked in a breath, knowing there would be nothing she could say.

She watched as Kathy finally turned for good and slid into her car, slamming the car door shut and screeching off in a hurry.

Olivia could hardly breathe, she couldn't believe what Kathy had told her, she was furious at Elliot, confused, anxious but most of all livid.

She wandered slowly back to the station, she felt like she'd been hit by a bus. She had finally put all this behind her and focused solely on work and here she was again, with another can of opened worms. As she made her way back to her desk she saw him, pulling a coffee out of the tray and he looked over at her with a smile.

He'd handed her the cup but she didn't move, trying to decipher how exactly to play this. She could either blow up and confront him on it right now and cause a scene. She could drag him off the weight room again for a private confrontation or she could just ignore it and go on like nothing was a miss. Forget about it, as hard as that would be.

"Liv?" He questioned, gesturing the drink in his hand. She reached out and grabbed it, their fingers grazing. She held her breath.

"Chicken or Egg?" He asked her holding out the sandwiches.

She cleared her throat, "I don't care."

He handed her one of them and she took it, not even looking. She nodded her thanks and sat down at her desk, coming face-to-face with the divorce papers Kathy had strewn on her desk.

She was confused, awkward but most of all angry and she didn't know how long she could hide it. She could lie all she liked when it came to her job, she had the best poker face when it came to interrogation or undercover investigation, but when things struck below the belt she was as transparent as they came.

"You ok?" Elliot asked her a little concerned. She doubted he would believe her but she nodded. She picked up the papers, stood up and dropped them on his desk.

He watched her closely as she sipped at her coffee. He picked up the stack of papers and Olivia glanced over, catching his questioning gaze.

"Kathy dropped them off." She confirmed in a neutral tone. For a good moment Elliot held her eye contact, as if he was waiting for more information on this subject. She wouldn't give it to him. She turned then and began sorting through the papers on her desk.

Elliot took in the document in front of him, "Did she say anything?" He asked her and without looking up she shook her head.

"No." She spoke disinterested.

He tossed the papers to the side and began to open his sandwich, he took a bite and Olivia took another sip of coffee, the whole time he was watching her.

"So that's it, she just handed them to you and left? Without a word?" Elliot prodded with half a mouthful.

"She asked me to see that you received them." Olivia confirmed, giving him impartial look.

"Why didn't she just send them through the post, it's just a copy, they're already signed." Elliot asked her.

"I don't know Elliot, why don't you ask her yourself?" She cut him off irritably.

He dropped the subject then, and continued to bite into his sandwich.

"Are you going to eat your sandwich?" Elliot asked her and she didn't look up.

"I'm not hungry." She mumbled despite not having eaten all day. After her conversation with Kathy she just felt nauseous.

"15 minutes ago you were hungry, that's why I got us lunch." Elliot reminded her.

"Well now I'm not ok." She said annoyed.

He sighed and reached over, picking up her sandwich and pulling out a half. She looked over at him confused.

"I wanted the chicken." He informed her and she rolled her eyes.

'Well you should have taken the damn chicken'. She wanted to scream.

"You should eat you know, you can't just live on coffee." He told her.

"Elliot, would you get off my case, I'll eat when I'm hungry." She stood up then, she didn't want to sit there and deal with Elliot's second-rate conversation when she couldn't stop thinking about what he'd done. She made her way to the bathroom just to get away from it all, she knew if he followed her, he wouldn't be able to get to her in the ladies room.

She closed the stall door behind her and sat on the top of the toilet, staring blankly at the door. She couldn't believe it, she was so angry at Elliot, he'd managed to screw things up just when she thought it was safe, and what's worse was he had no idea. She didn't know how long she could keep this buried. She knew at some point she'd lose it, and there would be no turning back. She sucked in a breath and decided it wouldn't be today, she pulled open the stall door and made her way back to her desk, intent on distracting her life with her work, instead of the other way around.

#####

Days.

She had made it days without conflict and she was finally feeling somewhat settled. She was on good terms with Elliot and she had practically suppressed any thoughts of her conversation with Kathy and what she had learned. The only place she couldn't stifle such thoughts when she slept. She couldn't stop the dreams, and each time she had one she would wake up feeling less in control.

Elliot was angry at her in this one, he was pulling her from her desk and leading her back behind the lockers, towards the weight room. She let him, a wave of excitement flowing through her as he pulled her with determination. As they entered the weight room he pushed her firmly against the wall and kissed her hard. He moved his lower half into her, holding her against the wall whilst he ransack her mouth. She could feel his hardness through his jeans and almost moaned at the prospect.

She moved her hands up to bring his body closer but he seized them pushing them shoulder height against the wall so she wouldn't stop him. She would have never let Elliot man handle her like this, but at this point she would let him do anything to her. He was moaning into her mouth as he released one hand letting it snake down to the bottom of her dress. What she was doing in a dress was beyond her, but he was pulling at her underwear and she used her free hand to undo his belt.

He quickly swatted her hand away and began to do it himself. He released her momentarily and pulled her away from the wall, over to the bench press. He lifted her up and placed her on the edge of the bench, pulling her underwear clean off and tossing them on the floor. He pulled his pants and underwear slightly down and then pushed her backward, climbing on top of her. She relaxed as he slid inside her and they moaned simultaneously.

"Liv." He was moaning in her ear. The whole bench was rocking as he was thrusting into her, her fingernails were digging into his back as she held onto him. 'Oh Liv,' was he moaning, 'Liv,' he said again…

"LIV?" Elliot's voice almost boomed through the station as she snapped out of it. She cleared her throat caught off guard, recalling last nights brutal dream. She looked over to his concerned expression and she shook off her thoughts.

"Yeah?" She asked in a daze.

He stood up and walked over to her, "Are you sure you're ok?" He asked quietly.

He leant against her desk and she swallowed, his body only inches from hers.

"I'm fine." She said weekly, trying to inch back in her chair so she wouldn't be able to feel the body heat radiating from him.

"You don't seem fine." He concluded. She got a waft of his aftershave.

She stood up, intent on getting away from him, creating some distance but he reached out and lightly encircled her upper arm restricting her from moving. Her first instinct was to pull out of him immediately, but she wavered, letting the feel of his touch burn into her.

He watched her strangely as she didn't move from him, she in fact did the opposite. She stepped subtly closer until she was face to face with him. His backside was still perched on the desk and she moved in front of him almost so their bodies were touching.

He swallowed, a flicker of unease shot through his eyes. She told herself she was doing this to teach him a lesson, but deep down it was purely selfish, she needed to be this close if just for a second.

"I'm fine." She said slowly, "What about you?"

That's when his arm slipped down and she was no longer captive, she didn't step back or give him space, she stayed just where she was.

"I'm fine." He said softly and she nodded slowly. As she turned to walk away she purposefully grazed her thigh against his, smiling inwardly. She reclaimed her position in her chair and went back to the notes in front of her. He pushed himself off her desk and made his way back to his seat eyeing her the whole time.

#####

The day had dragged and Elliot was constantly conscious of her all day, giving her wary looks. She was beginning to regret her earlier behavior and realized she had only stirred the pot.

She barely said goodbye, she had to get out of there so as she noticed he was speaking to Munch she took that opportunity to leave. Grabbing her stuff she walked past both of them and quietly announced her departure. She could tell Elliot was less than impressed, but he didn't make a fuss in front of Munch. She smiled to herself as she heard Munch's incessant conspiracy talk as she walked out.

She got to her car in record time, a six sense telling her not to wander or he may catch up with her. As she pulled open her front door, he grabbed it and slammed it shut. She nearly jumped out of her skin.

She turned around out of breath, "Jesus Elliot, what the hell." She searched his face for an explanation.

"What was that?" He questioned her and she folded her arms and leant back on the car.

"What are you talking about?" She asked casually.

"Don't play innocent, your little performance earlier?" He gave her a questioning glare.

"Elliot, I don't know what you're talking about." She reached for the car door handle and he moved in, pushing it shut once more. He had sandwiched her against the car. His body was close.

"Why don't you try it again Liv, out here with no witnesses." He provoked her.

She swallowed but let him cage her, she was enjoying the heat of his body against hers.

"Or is that the way you like it, in a crowded station so you know I can't respond that way I'd like to."

"Oh yeah, and how would you like to?" She pushed him with a small hint of a smile.

He returned that smile and moments later he leaned in, moving his mouth towards hers. His body pressed against hers as his lips drew down and she prepared herself for that hot passionate mouth that she had dreamt about. Moments from colliding with hers they were stopped in their tracks at the sound of Elliot's cell phone.

He closed his eyes and moved off her, evidently pissed off.

"You've got to be kidding me." he muttered as he pulled the phone from his pocket and noted who was calling, he hesitated for a moment and then answered it. It must have been work Olivia concluded. Elliot watched her as he answered the call and she was half smiling at his annoyance at their interruption.

Then she heard the voice on the other end of the line. That voice. They were close enough and Kathy was loud enough that half the car park could have heard them. Immediately Olivia remembered their conversation, the lie, the whole nine yards. She knew she could never escape Kathy.

Her smile had faded and she was already reaching for her car door. Elliot had one handedly reached out for her trying to stop her from getting in. He was obviously too distracted by the phone call to actually stop her and she had turned the ignition on before he'd even attempted to open the door again. She quickly slammed the lock on her door down so he couldn't open it.

'Wait.' He mouthed to her through the window and she shook her head more at herself, putting the car into gear and pulling away.

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To be continued. If you liked it please leave a review.

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