I Don't Own FullMetal Alchemist, So Don't Think I Do. I Don't. Arakawa Hiromu Does. So Think She Does. Because She Does.

Thanks to the fabulous daaaarlings that reviewed!!
The Fabulous Daaaarlings Are:
Moonlight-Arashi
xxxReadySteadyGoxxx
Aqemy Von Stein
miyuki
xWeaselxWolfx
Rosoku
Element Girls

Yeah...I said it'd take a while, but...I love writing this story too much T-T Curse You Reviewing Readers.

The Sulfur Alchemist
Chapter Four:
Assessments and Snakes

"Did you hear? Edward Elric challenged Roy Mustang to a fight for his assessment." A woman says from behind me. I was currently scanning some papers for the General. But that got me to stop.

"Oh yes! I was so surprised. I mean, Roy Mustang is the Flame Alchemist after all." I rolled my eyes at the other woman's words. Obviously she's in love with Roy.

"Mhm, but Edward's a child prodigy! He is the FullMetal Alchemist. Think about, he might win." The other says, causing me to smirk.

"Good point. . ." The other girl says, before they both walk off, coffee in their hands.

Once I made sure the room was empty, I began jumping around in spot, while chanting, "Yes yes yes yes yes!!"

Recently I'd been looking for a "cover-up job" to tell Hannah. I hadn't even been given a job by Mustang yet, which was unusual. He liked to see me 5 minutes a week max, so he always had some kind of job for me as soon as I got to HQ. But not this time, which was odd.

And now, being handed to me on a silver platter, was something to do! I mean, Hannah had been curious since we haven't been getting any jobs in the past week since we got back to Central. I needed something, and here it was!

At the sound of someone clearing their throat, I stop jumping and spin to the door. Three guys were standing there, all staring at me like I was a lunatic. "Wh-what?" I ask defensively. They continue to stare, so I yell frustrated before stomping out of the room, embarrassed.

. . .

"So. . .Why are we here again?" I ask, looking up at Hannah who eyed the kittens dreamily, and the snakes suspiciously.

She turns to me and glares. I only shrugged, as she said, "To get a cat! I just told you, didn't I?"

I shook my head as I walked past the birds, and to the snakes, "Hey, if I remembered, I wouldn't of asked, now would I?" She glares at me playfully, and I look closer at a certain snake. It had several rings down it's body, starting black, then red, black again, and finally yellow.

I smiled slightly, humming the old rhyme I was taught a long time ago. "Let's get a snake." I say simply, causing Hannah to stiffen. I giggled as she began yelling at me.

"Very funny Riley! You know I hate snakes! No way do I wanna wake up on a train with a snake in my face!" She shouts with hands on her hips.

I look back at her and say, "Aw come on, it won't wake in your face. I'll keep it in a cage. . .And besides, this one isn't venomous, it can't hurt you."

She looks away, "humph"ing, before mumbling, "Venomous or not, I don't like snakes."

I pout as I stand, crossing my arms. "So either pick a pet or let's leave." I say bluntly, shrugging my shoulders. She sighs and walks toward the cats.

As we walked down the isle, I stuck my hands in my pockets. "Well, let's hurry then. I've got a job at the Military Headquarters to shoot, and it should be starting soon." I say, recalling the event that occurred with me trying to get info on the battle. . .

"What time does it start?" I ask darkly, behind the man, peaking at him over his shoulder. The man jumps, and spins around to me.

"Wh-what?!" He asks, freaked out.

I sigh and shake my head. With a roll of my eyes, I ask, "What time does the fight between Mustang and Elric start? What time man, what time?!"

He jumps again, and stumbles backwards, "I don't know! I'm not going to be here for it, I've got a mission in-"

Beginning to trudge away, I bend my head down as I mutter darkly, "Ah, you're useless, soldier!"

"Hey Major?" I ask cutely, smiling up at him with a wide grin. He doesn't look up at me from his book and meal, so I sigh. "Major Hughes. . .!" I whine like a spoiled little girl.

His head snapped up, and he looked around wildly with his hand at his forehead. "Funny. . .I thought I heard someone calling me! But of course, they weren't, they said Major, and I'm a Lieutenant Colonel!"

My brow twitches slightly as I glare at him. "Lt. Colonel Hughes." I say in monotone, and he looks at me instantly.

"Yeeeees?" He asks.

Shaking my head at him, I ask, "What time is the fight between Ed and Roy?"

He raises a brow to me, "Ed? You're calling him on a first name basis? Does that mean you know him?" I glare at him, with a look telling him to get to the answer, so he sighs, "Alright. . .It's in two hours."

Hannah looks back to me as she walked, "So your boss gave you a job?"

I paused, looking at the ceiling. ". . .You could say that!"

Honestly, Roy had no idea I'd be there. As far as he was concerned, I didn't even know about it! Hehe. . .Imagine his pleasant surprise when he sees moi standing there with a camera!

. . .Well, I'd like to think it'd be a pleasant surprise. And besides, in my own little world, it would be.

"What about this one?" She asks, looking at a black and white cat sitting in the top cage thing. It sat there staring at us with puppy-dog eyes. . .

Hey, if a cat can do puppy eyes, why do they call it puppy eyes?

Placing my hands on my hips, I shake my hand continuously. "No. Nuh-uh. As much as I love cats, they're too independent, especially for us. He'd run away the second we step off the train." I say, causing her to pout at me. "I said no Hannah. We can't. I love cats, I do, but. . ."

She sighs, nodding, "I understand. Let's go then." She began walking down the isle, so I followed.

"We could get a dog? They're always loyal!" I say, causing her to shake her head, "Nah. I'm not much a dog person."

. . .

I sigh as I stood in the crowd of several military personnel. "Um. . .Riley? What is your job exactly?" Hannah asks, looking around nervously.

Stiffening, I glance at her, "My job? What do you mean. . .I told you, a photographer!" She glares at me and I smile nervously, "Oh! You meant why we're here. . ." She nods like it's obvious, so I say, "The FullMetal Alchemist challenged The Flame Alchemist to a fight for his yearly assessment."

Hannah looks at me confused, "Yearly Assessment?"

I nod, "Yeah. In basic terms, it decides whether or not you're still worthy of your title. And a fight between you and another State Alchemist, like this, is one of the many ways."

She nods, but stops. Turning to me, she asks, "Wait, the FullMetal Alchemist? Isn't that Ed?!"

I mock realization, "Oh, my, gosh! It is, isn't it?!" Hannah rolls her eyes before glaring at me. "I cannot believe that it's Ed! Of all people-"

Interrupting me by covering my mouth with her hand, Hannah mutters, "Shut up. I didn't know, ok?" I nod stiffly, so she lets go.

Hearing footsteps behind us, and seeing several military personnel step aside, I glance behind us to see Mustang walking up. "Hannah! Go over there," I start as I point several feet away and off to our right, "and wait. I want to get a picture of the arena from this angle, and I'll come over."

She nods, and walks off, just as Mustang reaches me. "What are you doing here Ms. Mauler?" Roy asks, twitching slightly at the sight of me here.

I smirk and motion to the camera in my head, "Oh, just came to shoot some pics of the fight. I thought it'd be cool for Hannah and I to see Ed and Al again. . ." I smirk wider and say, "Plus I just really wanted to see you get your ass kicked by a 15 year old!"

He glares at me and I laugh as I walk toward Hannah. Standing next to her, I saw Hughes standing in front of a large wall.

"Ladies and gentlemen!" He shouts.

Hannah leans toward me and asks, "Who's that?"

"Majo- Lieutenant Colonel Maes Hughes." I say, before turning my attention back to Hughes.

"Take a look!" He shouts into the microphone before pulling a rope. A large cover falls off the wall behind him, and my brow twitches at the sight of a picture of who else? Elysia. "Oh my gosh, she's so cute!" Hannah says under her breath. I look at my probable mentally challenged friend as if she were crazy, before trying to ignore the fact that another Hughes may have just been born in this crowd. During this, we managed to miss the probably hilarious moment that the wall decided to attack poor Hughes.

"In the red corner, The Flame Alchemist, and hero of the Eastern Rebellion, Colonel Roy Mustang!! Give it up!"

And guess what happened?

Much to my delight, everyone began booing. "You just want another promotion!" One shouts, causing me to bite my lip to stop my laughs from escaping. But then, someone else shouted, "Give me back my girlfriend!" That was all I could take. I suddenly burst out laughing, almost doubling over from the pain in my stomach that hit me instantly. Roy looked over at me, and only looked deadpan as he turned away.

"In the blue corner, The FullMetal Alchemist and Living Legend of the People! Let's hear it for Edward Elric!"

People booed at this as well, which just. . .wasn't quite as funny. Hannah and I looked to them, and saw Al holding of all things, a kitten. Beside Al, was Ed, who stood there grumpily. I then found out why he was grumpy when I heard people shout things like, "Where?! I can't see him!" or "Grade school's more like it!"

But then. . .The statement of doom. . ."Good luck Bean-sprout!"

Ed flipped, shouting profanities at the crowd as Al easily held him back. Giggling, Hannah says, "Figures." I nod amusedly, as their friends leave the arena.

"Alchemists get set! Ready and fiiiiiggghhhttt!!" Hughes shouts, running away quickly.

The fight was an interesting, and amusing one. Ed had his stupid moves (exploding at the word 'small'), but he also had his smart moments. Roy was cocky. Surprise, huh? And Roy attacked the crowd (at that time, I began wondering about how the crowd got bandages on their burns so fast more then how the fight would end.) I had a good laugh at Ed's expense when he went flying (and screaming) into the air, in which earned a slap in the arm from Hannah.

But the end was what interested me the most. Roy had a perfect opportunity to finish the battle, but then he just. . .froze! And because of that, Ed was able to put his auto-mail blade to Roy's throat. My only question, was what happened to Roy at such a crucial time? It was then the Furher stepped in, clapping as he did. "Come on, fight's over. If we leave now and wait for the rest to leave, we can see Ed and Al." I say as I start to walk away. Hannah nods and we both begin slipping through people to get out of the crowd.

. . .

"Let's go. . .this way!" I exclaim, running down a certain hall. I knew exactly where I was, hell I knew the HQ like the back of my hand. But Hannah didn't know I knew!

"Are you sure. . .?" She asks suspiciously as she turns the corner after me.

Ignoring her, I point at the two brothers walking down the hall, "There! There's Al!" Both brothers stop at my voice and turn, but I decide to pick fun of Ed. "Now we just have to find Ed!" I exclaim, smiling stupidly at Hannah, who merely shook her head at me.

Ed twitched slightly, but that just wasn't enough. I turn to Al and begin waving my arms wildly, "Hey Al! You got a microscope I could use?"

"Alright, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!" Ed shouts, running after me. I laugh as a crazed maniac as I run away.

. . .

"So where are you going now?" Hannah asks looking to Ed and Al. We were walking down a road, and it was around midnight. Al was still carrying the cat around.

Ed shrugs, "Rush Valley. Mustang said that's where Dr. Marcoh is."

Hannah and I nod. "And why are looking for this guy?" I ask curiously.

The brothers pause, causing me to smirk knowingly. "We think he has the stone." Ed says. Hannah looks at me confused, but I shake my head briefly. She'd find out when they told her, not me.

We all stop and Ed makes a cradle out of a box, putting the kitten inside. Al sighs sadly, and Ed says, "Sorry Al. But we can't keep it, and we can't expect Mustang to take it, not after he told us about Marcoh. It was a fair trade."

Hannah looks to me cutely, saying, "Can't we take him?"

I scoff as I stick my hands in my pockets, looking away as I did. "Not unless you want a snake in your face when you wake up on the train." Her eyes widen, getting the picture, before stepping away from the cat.

"Thought so."

Did You Know? - All of the military personnel (except Bradley) was named after a military aircraft made in around the Mid-20th centry, in which some were used during World War II.

Alex Armstrong - Great Britain's Armstrong Whitley
Roy Mustang - America's P-51 Mustang
Fury - FJ-1 Fury
Havoc - Mi-28 Havoc
Hawkeye - E-2 Hawkeye
Hughes - P-73 Hughes
Black Hayate - Japan's Nakajima Ki-84 Hayate
Bradley - Though not named after an aircraft, he was named after something involving World Ward II. The man he was named after was the fourth officer ever to reach the rank of 5-star general in the Army, a promotion only possible during wartime.

And the OC Riley was named after a World War II aircraft as well.
Riley - Martin AM-1 Mauler

If you already knew all this, then...I knew it first!! XP

Review, It Makes Me Want To Update. But Be Responsible! Don't Flame And Drive!