He decides early on that his least favorite part of teaching is grading papers. He can deal with a bunch of rambunctious, potty mouthed 15 years olds , but the guilt that comes with having to write that big fat F on the corner of their papers never gets easier, even with the ones he doesn't like, which at this point is roughly half. It's been a solid month since he started at PS 42 and he's surprised that any of these kids have managed to grow on him, but Beiste assured him that they would after she finished chewing him out for the mug incident, which in his defense worked like a charm. She also assured him that every teacher had to dole out a bad grade every once in awhile and that he shouldn't beat himself up too much, but it's hard not to, Rachel is one of the best actors and singers he's ever met , and all he truly wants is to be the best at what he does too, if only he can get through to them somehow.
"I hope you realize how depressing it was for me to have to grade your papers," Finn says as he passes back essays.
"Need a Xanax loony?" Kitty says, coolly.
"Xanax is for anxiety, not depression," he says, unfazed. "Good job by the way," he continues, handing back her A- paper.
"Fucking cheater," Ryder says under his breath.
"The fuck I cheated, it's not my fault I learned to read in kindergarten like a normal person," Kitty shoots back. She's been giving him shit ever since Finn made him read aloud in class. The way he struggled to sound out the words made Finn feel instantly bad for him, but the other kids weren't exactly sympathetic, only Jake laid off even a little.
"Enough you guys," Finn says firmly. "Ryder, see me after class," he continues, handing Ryder his latest in a line of D+'s. He always reacts to a bad grade in the same way, he doesn't roll his eyes, or shrug it off like the others or insult him like he'd imagine Kitty would if she ever received a bad grade, he just wilts a little, his eyes growing sad, so few of these kids seem to give a shit about their grades, but Ryder clearly gives a shit, even if he didn't want anyone to know.
"Look you guys, I know that you're young and you don't think that anything you do right now is going to effect the rest of your lives, but trust me on this, you'll have it a lot easier if you make an effort now, read your books, try to pay just a little bit of attention when I talk, I didn't think this stuff was interesting when I was your age either but trust me it is.
"Here we go, another, when I was your age speech," Jake says, rolling his eyes. "Do you really think that cliché bullshit works?"
"Look, it wasn't that long ago alright," Finn says.
"Was it before or after the nuthouse?" Jake shoots back.
"You're calling me cliche?" Finn shoots back. "Why don't you come up with another insult, you're starting to bore me."
"Whatever," Jake says, sliding down in his seat a little.
"Okay, let's get down to business, what do you guys know about the American Revolution?"
"Are you kidding me?" Ryder scoffs.
"What, none of you have seen The Patriot?" Finn jokes.
"It was the war the Americans fought against the British over tea or some shit," Jake says under his breath.
"Okay," Finn says, nodding once, he had Jake figured out at that point, considering his B plus average so far the bad boy shtick was clearly an act. He noticed the way he always quickly stuffed his papers into his backpack to keep the other students from seeing them, it was a sad state of affairs when kids actually felt ashamed of being smart. "Not a bad start."
He went over today's lesson with Rachel, after nearly half his students either failed or scraped by with a D she suggested it was time to break out the big guns, the truth is he's hesitant to even glance at his guitar in front of these kids, god knows they give him enough shit about being crazy, they certainly didn't seem like a bunch that would respond to a dorky white guy with a guitar, and the last thing he wanted was to waste time, but he promised Rachel he would sing, so he took a deep breath and reached behind his desk for the guitar.
"Oh hell no," Phil says as Finn begins strumming, well more like whispers, the cornrowed boy is still pretty rattled about the mug incident, although not enough to try pulling more than an F plus on any of his papers.
"What's the matter Philly D?" Finn says, using the boy's nickname sarcastically. "You don't like country western."
"Do I look like I'm trying to listen to no fucking country western?" Phil scoffs.
"Well you're in luck because that stuffs lost on me after Johnny Cash, but how do you feel about some good old fashioned America themed Rock and Roll?"
"God could you be any lamer?" Jake interjects.
"Ignoring you," Finn shoots back. "Now feel free to follow along if you've heard this one," Finn continues as he riffs violently on his guitar, cursing himself for not going electric, but he figures the acoustic will do in a pinch, even for the rocked out arrangement of the song he, Rachel and Blaine worked on last night.
Now, the ride of Paul Revere
Set the nation on its ear,
And the shot at Lexington heard 'round the world,
When the British fired in the early dawn
The War of Independence had begun,
The die was cast, the rebel flag unfurled.
And on to Concord marched the foe
To seize the arsenal there you know,
Waking folks searching all around
Till our militia stopped them in their tracks,
At the old North Bridge we turned them back
And chased those Redcoats back to Boston town.
"This is fucking stupid," Jake interrupts.
"Looks like Puckerman wants to join in," Finn says to a few scattered chuckles. "How 'bout it Jake?"
The boy sinks down in his seat a little before he begins to mumble the next few words.
And the shot heard 'round the world
Was the start of the Revolution.
The Minute Men were ready, on the move.
Take your powder, and take your gun.
Report to General Washington.
Hurry men, there's not an hour to lose!
"You know there's actually a decent voice hidden under there," Finn says truthfully.
Now, at famous Bunker Hill,
Even though we lost, it was quite a thrill,
The rebel Colonel Prescott proved he was wise;
Outnumbered and low on ammunition
As the British stormed his position
He said, "Hold your fire till you see the whites of their eyes!"
He notices the class grow steadily quieter as he continues to sing, he thinks he even sees a few smiles, and as he finishes and sets the guitar stand back up, Kitty straightens up in her seat.
"Wow, usually listening to you makes me want to gouge my own eyes out but I have to say, that was suuuper hot," Kitty says.
"Inappropriate," Finn says. "But thank you."
"So, you sing?" Ryder says quietly.
"I sing, I play guitar and drums and I'm all about the American Revolution," Finn says. "Open up your books to page 109."
He thinks all and all it was a good lesson, he looks forward to telling Rachel after her play, it's opening night and on opening night of any performance she tends to avoid everybody, especially this performance, as nervous as she is about the prospect of Carmen Thibadeaux coming.
"You wanted to see me?" Ryder mumbles, reluctantly approaching Finn's desk.
"Yeah, sit down," Finn says, to which the boy obliges.
"Look, I know I fucked up that test, it's just—
"Dyslexia?" Finn guesses, cutting him off.
"What the hell is that?" Ryder says, knitting his brow in confusion.
"This orderly I knew from the hospital, Sam Evans, he had it," Finn explains. "It's why you read so slowly in class isn't it?"
"Are you making fun of me man?" Ryder says.
"Look, I didn't mean to embarrass you when I asked you to read out loud," Finn says. "It's a method we learned in teachers college, it helps the students feel involved."
"Well it made me feel like shit, I hope you're happy."
"I know what it's like okay, struggling with something I feel like I can't control, feeling like it's hopeless, but it's not."
"So you're comparing me to you now?" Ryder scoffs. "I'm not fucked in the head Mr. H."
"Stop being defensive I'm just trying to help."
"Well I didn't ask for your help," Ryder says, his voice breaking.
"Well you're going to get it. I set up an appointment for you with a learning disability specialist on Monday at 3," Ryder clearly wants to argue, but Finn cuts him off before he gets the chance. "And just in case you're thinking about not showing I already talked to your parents."
"Are you fucking serious, how could you do that?" Ryder says , panicked, shooting up from his seat
"Because I know how important it is for you to pass this class Ryder, I see it on your face every time I pass back one of your tests. You're not lazy, you're not stupid, chances are your brain just works a little differently than everyone else's."
"How do you know that I'm not stupid?" Ryder says, thawing a bit.
"Because I read your paper," he explains. "I think you know what you're trying to say Ryder, it's just that you can't quite figure out how to put it into words, that's where you need help, well I'm here, whether you like it or not. I'm not going to fuck you over I promise."
"Dude, did you just say fuck?" Ryder says, knitting his brow in confusion. "What the hell kind of teacher are you?"
"The kind that says fuck," Finn replies.
The younger boy shuffles his feet a little then, his hands shoved in his pockets. Finn can tell he wants to say something but isn't quite sure what.
"Who is that lady? In the picture?" He says, looking at the framed photo of Rachel on his desk.
"She's Rachel," Finn says with a smile on his voice.
"She your wife?"
"Girlfriend, going on eight years now."
"Why don't you marry her? She's hot, like really hot."
"That's not really something I can talk about with you Ryder. You guys already know a lot more about my personal life than I feel comfortable with."
"Is it against the rules? Because I'm pretty sure that swearing and throwing coffee mugs is too." Goddamn it, he knew this kid was smart.
"Marriage leads to children," Finn explains hesitantly.
"But you're a teacher, you must like kids."
"I do like kids," Finn says.
"But you don't want them to be crazy, is that it?"
Finn swallows hard at Ryder's accusation. "It's a little more complicated than that but I guess you can say that's part of it."
"Well, if it means anything you'd probably make a better dad than mine," Ryder says, probably the first nice thing any of these kids has ever said to him, aside from Kitty calling him hot that is. "That's not saying a whole lot but still. Anyway, see you Monday."
As Ryder leaves Finn smiles a bit to himself.
After going home, getting showered and dressed and getting started on Monday's lesson, he decides to walk to the WCTC playhouse, a bit of a spring in his step. He can't wait to tell Rachel about how class went, she knows he's been a bit disappointed in his class lately, and he really can't wait to see her show, he's a little surprised that he can still get so excited about seeing her onstage. He likes to think seeing her on an actual Broadway stage will be that much sweeter, even if she does have to relive the ghosts of her past to get there. He's been reassuring himself about it for the past month. It's about as tasteful a rape scene as they could probably manage, and she made it through practicing with him okay, so why was he still so worried? He supposes it doesn't help that Samantha Barks already landed the role of Eunice. He brushes the thoughts aside again. This is Rachel's night, she's going to be amazing and if Thibadeaux does come and offer her an audition for Mrs. Slattery then he would be happy for her.
She's was amazing, as usual, possibly even better than usual, watching her up on that stage he had to keep reminding himself that she was a real person, let alone his, and as she emerges from backstage he greets her with a kiss and a tulip in a beautifully decorated ceramic pot. The first time he gave her cut flowers she cried when they started to wilt, he knows that it wasn't really about the flowers, but he still doesn't like to risk it, even if it means their apartment and balcony is overrun with potted flowers that she's named individually at this point, Kurt does enjoy the smell.
"You were fantastic, Finn says, planting a firm kiss on her cheek.
"Thank you, so were you I'm sure," She squeals. "How did class go?"
"Amazing, I sang the song and they only groaned for like the first verse, a few of them actually smiled, it was unbelievable."
"I knew the guitar was a good idea," she says. "I told you, you and I are going to be Broadway's biggest power couple since Taye and Idina."
"I think to be a power couple I have to be famous too," Finn says.
"But you are famous, you're famous with the kids of PS 42."
"I wouldn't go that far, but thanks," he says kissing her again. "So, did you see her?" he continues hesitantly. "In the audience, did you see her?"
"You mean the her," Rachel says playfully.
"So she came, she actually came," Finn says, sounding a bit more surprised than he wanted to.
"Of course she came, and now I'm patiently waiting for her to come to me but she's certainly taking her precious time."
"You mean to tell me that she came and you're not practically attacking her right now?" Finn says in disbelief.
"Well, I don't want to come on too strong," She says. "I have to exude a certain confidence."
"Yeah, and how many times have you called her in the past month?"
"27, which means that actually approaching her right now would definitely be coming on too strong."
He knows he shouldn't advise her to go up to Carmen, whom by the way Rachel is staring at her right now and biting her lip is definitely the bespectacled, austere-looking black woman in the Turban and blazer, chatting up Rachel's director, whom according to Rachel is an old friend. He shouldn't tell her to go up to her, because if she does there's no way she's leaving without an audition, if her breathtaking performance wasn't enough, her tenacity would seal the deal, but looking at her face, looking at the hope behind her eyes, he simply can't not.
"Go," Finn says suddenly and simply.
"You think I should?"
"I think she's playing it cool right now, she wants to see if you can be that same amazing girl who's been harassing her for the past few weeks, that's the girl she wants to offer the audition. Go over there and take it."
"Okay," she says taking a deep breath and handing him the potted plant. "Hold Esmeralda."
He can't help but feel a little sad when she goes up to Carmen, he just watches them for a moment. Carmen's face is hard to read, but he has a feeling that's probably always the case. He feels like an eternity has passed when Rachel finally returns to him, her hand over her mouth, tears in her eyes and a beaming smile on her face, and all he can do is smile back.
"She said that my performance was hauntingly beautiful, can you believe that?" Rachel says swinging his hand back and forth as they walk back to the apartment taking.
"Of course I can believe it, I was there," Finn says. "I'm so proud of you Rachel."
"I audition for Cassandra on Saturday, since most of the cast has already been picked out I might even get to do a chemistry read on the same day, Cassandra July loves to throw curveballs like that. Can you imagine, what if I actually get to read with Samantha Barks? She played Eponine, you know."
"You're going to be great I know it," Finn says, his voice a bit faraway.
"What's wrong sweet baby?" Rachel says, stopping to look up at him. "You're not jealous that Brody Weston will be playing my husband are you? Because you're so much cuter, trust me on that."
"No, it's not that," Finn says sighing.
"Finn, for the last time, I'm going to be okay," she says, sensing what's wrong.
"I know, I know you are, it's my issue, not yours, you know I think you're brilliant and that you can handle any curveball Cassandra July or anyone else throws at you."
"Thank you," she says, standing on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "So what do you want to do? The night is young, I'm going to be famous and life is beautiful," she continues, swinging around a lamp post.
"I have an idea," Finn says slyly, and he takes her hand then and starts to pick up speed.
"Where are you taking me Finn Hudson!" she says, laughter filling her voice.
"It's a surprise just follow me."
It's a short run to their destination, but when they get there they're still a bit tired and winded, needing to catch their breath before Rachel can fully process the nature of Finn's surprise.
"Finn, this is the Rafferty, this place closed down a year ago," she says of the decrepit old theater. "Why are we here?"
"It was where we had our first New York date, it was A Chorus Line I think."
"Actually it was Anything Goes, we saw A Chorus Line at the Gershwin."
Whatever, we've seen a lot of plays," he says flippantly. "But do you remember what you said to me after the play?"
She smiles a weak smile. "That's going to be me up there one day," she says sadly. "I guess I'm still a little sad I never got a chance to."
"Says who?" Finn says with a devilish grin and with that he starts to paw through the bushes until he finds what he's looking for, the chain cutter he stole from the super this morning and hid there on his way to work. He cuts the rusted chain in one fell swoop and grabs her hand, leading her inside. He reaches into his pocket for a lighter and uses his cell phone to find the candles lining the back wall.
"Oh my god Finn," She says excitedly as the candles dimly light their way. "Look how beautiful, oh it's so much bigger than I remember."
He wouldn't necessarily call this place beautiful, with all of the cobwebs and dust covering everything, but the shine in her eyes at the sight of it all certainly is.
"Let's hope at least one of these stage lights still work," Finn says as they approach the stage. After helping her up onto it he ventures behind the curtain in search of the stage lights.
"Here we go, he says, pulling the big switch, amazed that one of the lights actually turns on, and even more amazed that it's the one right above Rachel, more evidence that she was meant for the spotlight.
"What do you say Rachel Berry?" Finn says, jumping down from the stage and taking a seat in the front row. "Ready for your Broadway debut?"
As always her smile can light up the darkest of rooms, and the one she's giving him now is no exception.
The Historic Rafferty theatre presents Sondheim's timeless classic Follies, starring the incomparable Rachel Berry.
As she begins to sing I'm still here there's even less doubt in his mind that she was meant for this, and he wants it for her so badly, maybe even as much as she wants it for herself. And he'll be there with her Saturday like he promised, he'll support her no matter what.
Good times and bum times, I've seen 'em all
And, my dear, I'm still here
Flush velvet sometimes
Sometimes just pretzels and beer, but I'm here
I've run the gamut, A to Z
Three cheers and dammit, C'est la vie
I got through all of last year, and I'm here
Lord knows, at least I was there, and I'm here
Look who's here, I'm still here!
The sound of his applause echoing off the walls penetrates the deafening silence following her song, and he continues to clap as he ascends the stage, stopping only to embrace her, letting her wrap her legs around his hips and her arms around his neck and kiss him hard.
"You're a star Rachel," he whispers into her ear after breaking the kiss. "No matter what happens, no matter what roles you get or don't get, whether you're singing on a Broadway stage or in our living room you'll always be the biggest star on earth, don't you ever forget that okay?"
"Okay, I promise," she says, smiling as she kisses him again. They should leave, sooner or later the cops will know that something is up, but he hopes it will be later as Rachel stares intensely into his eyes as she starts to pull off his tie. At that he walks carefully backstage, Rachel still in his arms, feeling for the stage light as he kisses her. And before they both know it they're on the floor, their clothes serving as blankets that they lie naked upon, kissing each other and exploring each other's bodies like they're both teenagers again. He wants this forever, he wants her forever, no matter what, no matter how hard things get sometimes, no matter how chaotic life is, the one thing that will never change is that he'll love her endlessly.
A/N: Well Finn and Rachel's careers are both going swimmingly, but this wouldn't be much of a story without conflict, expect this story to get a little depressing in the next few chapters, but no matter how bad things get, you can still look forward to a happy ending. I know I shouldn't tell you that, but I want you to keep reading. And also look forward to more Rachel in the next chapter, I know I've been focusing on Finn a lot, but that's just the way the story is progressing. And one more thing, I know that I said that I wouldn't use Brody because I don't think I've ever hated a character more, but I really can't think of anyone else to use in this particular situation, but I promise not to make him too much more awful than he has the potential to be on the actual show. Stay tuned folks!