Nana Ana knows Best
Junkrat stood and tapped his foot as he waited by the door, "You could 'ave told me she was coming." he grumbled and looked at Pharah, "Just one sentence would have made me less angry."
"I did tell you, but you never ever listen." Pharah shook her head, "I told you last week that her house was being fumigated for pulp ants." she informed again and then heard the doorbell ring.
"I'll show you pulp ants you hrmhrmhrmhrm..." Junkrat grumbled and opened the door, only to see an old woman with tanned skin holding a briefcase, "Ah... Missus Ana!" he smiled and waved.
"Hello, Jamison." Ana responded and looked at Pharah, "Ah... Fareeha." she smiled and set her case down, then ran to hug her.
"Ummi." Pharah smiled, "Don't worry, I set up your room as best as I could!" she told her, "Do you need anything, I'm sure you're very tired from the trip here."
"I just need my dear Jamison here to get the bags from my car." Ana turned to Jamison, who was not very pleased, "I'm sure he would be able to help out his poor, weak, old mother-in law."
Junkrat huffed and rolled his eyes, "If you're so weak how did you load them in the first- Ow!" he was hit by Pharah, "I'm going." he grumbled and walked outside.
"Where is my little baby?" Ana asked as she looked around, "I brought her a little gift." she pulled out a little bag of cookies.
"She's taking a nap." Pharah responded, then turned to see Junkrat struggle with a pile of luggage.
"Hrmph... Gr..." Junkrat groaned as he tried to lift and balance all the thing.
"What are you, made of butter?" Ana said, both she and Pharah laughing.
"Laugh while you can..." Junkrat growled, "Crickey! What did you put in here? Bricks!?" he set the briefcases down by the television and opened one of them.
Inside was a lot of bags of clay.
"Oh! How wonderful..." Junkrat grumbled.
"Hey, it wasn't bricks." Ana shrugged her shoulders.
"It was almost bricks." Junkrat responded, "Just give them a few days to dry! Man..." he sighed and sat down, wiping his sweaty forehead soon after.
Pharah looked at her mother, "Are you sure you don't wan't anything? A drink, or something to eat?" she asked worriedly.
"I'm fine, Fareeha dear." Ana smiled and sat down, "Wow, such a nice couch." she felt the place she was sitting on.
"Just make sure not to get it dirty." Junkrat said as he turned on the TV, "I paid good money for this couch." he said and scrolled through the channels.
"Jamison, you know I'm the cleanest person ever." Ana mumbled, "Fareeha dear, sit down, I don't like you standing up like a soldier."
"Oh ummi." Pharah said, "Ok." she said and sat at the other end, sandwiching Junkrat in between her and Ana, "What do you want to watch, ummi?" she asked.
"What?" Junkrat turned to her, "Fareeha darlin', you know I was going to wa-"
"Jamison, you watch TV all day." Pharah told him, "Let my ummi watch it for once, it won't kill you." she said and grabbed the remote from his hands.
"Thank you, Fareeha dear." Ana chuckled, "Do you have the cooking channel? I want to see if that cake show is still on."
"Cake show?" Junkrat groaned and slumped, "Ugh..."
Suddenly, a quick patter of feet ran down the stairs.
"Oh!" Ana grinned as she saw the little girl run in, "My baby!" she opened her arms.
"Nana!" the girl ran to the woman and hugged her, "When did you come here?"
"Right now... and all for you my baby." Ana smiled and picked her up.
"Good, because daddy doesn't like it when you come over." the girl said, causing Ana to frown and slowly turn to Junkrat.
"You shouldn't lie like that, dearest." Junkrat said nervously, "Especially not to your grandmum... Lyin' ain't good." he turned to Ana, "Especially to your dear, wonderful grandmum."
"Hmm..." Ana scowled and then turned back to the girl, "Oh... I brought you something." she smiled and pulled out her cookies, "I made them just for you... peanut butter scones."
"Oh! Peanut butter scones!?" Junkrat said, "I love those-" he only received a hand to his chest.
"These are not for you!" Ana scolded, "These are for your young one. Now eat up, baby." she patted the girl's head, "You need all the food you can eat."
"Thanks, Nana." the girl grinned and opened the bag.
"Uh uh uh." Pharah shook her head, "Not until lunch." she extended her hand.
"Oh..." the girl groaned and placed the cookies in her mother's hand, "Booey."
"You mean she hasn't eaten lunch?" Ana gasped in horror, as if she just heard Pharah confess to murder, "Fareeha, it's 2 o'clock!" she yelled and looked at her watch, "When was the last time she ate?!"
"Uh... at 9." Pharah muttered, "Before I le-"
"9!?" Ana's eye shot open, "Oh no no no no!" she shook her head and nearly yanked the cookies out of her hands, "Fareeha, a young one has to eat every 3 hours! Here, my little baby." she said and patted the little girls head, "Oh I'm so sorry- Nana is going to cook you up a nice soup right now!" she snapped her fingers and walked to the kitchen.
"Ummi-" Pharah turned to her daughter, "You will not eat those, you hear me?" she said and turned to her own mother, "Ummi!"
"Awww..." the girl grumbled and looked at Junkrat, "Dad..."
Junkrat was in an internal struggle of his own.
Should he listen to his partner, or the intimidating authority of his in-law?
"Please, daddy?" the girl pleaded.
"Eat them, baby!" Ana called out from the kitchen.
"You can eat them." Junkrat told the girl, who smiled.
"No! Not until you eat lunch!" Pharah called out a few seconds after.
"Oh no you can't eat those!" Junkrat grabbed the cookies and saw his girl pout.
"Eat them while I make your soup, my little one!" Ana repeated.
"Oh yeah here you can eat them." Junkrat was about to hand them back.
"No no! I forbid you from eating sweets before lunch!" Pharah interrupted, causing the man to jerk his arm back.
"Not when she's probably starving!" Ana called out, "Eat, my child!"
Junkrat's arm jerked back and forth as the paradoxical commands sounded through the house, "AH CRICKEY! ENOUGH!" the man finally exploded in anger and walked to the kitched, "Feed your own darn kid!" he threw the bag of cookies on the table and walked off muttering angry curses to himself.
Ana looked at Pharah.
Pharah looked at Ana.
"See what you did, Ummi?" Pharah crossed her arms, "I don't want to spoil my child with sweets before real food!" she grunted.
"Are you calling my peanut butter scones fake food?" Ana gasped, taking it as a terrible insult.
"What!?" Junkrat yelled and stormed back in, "How... How dare... you?" he pointed at Pharah, "How dare you blaspheme the peanut butter scone?"
"I wish you were as respectful as Jamison." Ana growled, "You are a fine son-in-law indeed." she smiled at the man.
"Oh yeah?" Pharah retorted, "If Jamison is such a saint, why does he say "Gee, Fareeha, the only relation I see between your mom and King Tut is that they're probably the same age"." she informed.
Ana scowled at Jamison with a glare that could burn through steel.
"I did not say that!" Jamison yelled, "A-At least all the time!" he stammered, "It's not like you're a good too! How about that time you left our little darlin' in the car at the market during summertime?" he crossed his arms.
Ana was horrified.
"No-No! I was- I was in a hurry!" Pharah looked at her mother, "Honest- If only someone in this house would help me do all the work!" she looked back at Jamison, "Instead of just plopping down after his job!"
Ana looked at Jamison with a grimace.
"I do do things!" Jamison called back, "I do things, like not leaving the bathtub on with your 6 month child in it!" he yelled in anger.
"Ah!" Pharah gasped, "Oh you swore you'd never bring that up again!" she growled in rage and pointed at him, "You no good lying rat!"
"At least I'm not a careless eagle!" Junkrat shot back.
"THAT IS ENOUGH!" Ana yelled with a voice equal in power to a lightning bolt from Mount Olympus, causing the other two to fall silent.
"I have never been more ashamed to be in a household." the old woman shook her head, "Not only is there pent up hostility, but also irresponsibility." she walked to the little girl, "And you know who suffers because of this? She does." she looked down to their daughter.
Pharah and Junkrat were devastated.
"It's not you two, it's her." Ana continued, "And if you want to help your dearest grow up to be a great woman, well you two better give her the example she needs."
"You're... You're right..." Pharah sighed, "I am sorry, Ummi..."
"Yeah, Pharah's sorry-"
"Junkrat!" Ana scolded the man.
"I'm sorry too." Junkrat looked down, "So what do we do?"
Ana grinned.
"Just leave that to me."
00000000
"Huh... Huh..." Pharah panted as she heaved a large mound of bed linens up some stairs, bumping into her partner, who was carrying a bucket of paint and a brush.
"Hey... Darlin'..." Junkrat sighed and wiped his brow as he walked up to her, "How are you fairin'?"
"Ummi has me double dry our little girl's sheets." Pharah responded, "She says that is the only thing that kills all the mites on there."
"Oh.. well you got it easy." Junkrat said, "I had to repaint dearest's room because it may have had lead paint on the walls... And I have the kitchen next." he groaned.
"I have it easy?" Pharah grumbled, "Do you know how tiring it is to wash all the cloths in the house- twice?" she gnashed her teeth, "And drying them... twice?"
"Try moving up and down a ladder while heaving a heavy paint can..." Junkrat shot back, "Have you tried that!?"
"I HOPE YOU'RE NOT FIGHTING UP THERE!" Ana's commanding voice called up, causing the two to fall silent.
"Huh..." Pharah sighed, "I should have told her to stay with Reinhardt..."
"Should have." Junkrat chuckled, "Well... we all have our faults, darlin'." he grinned and walked up to her.
"Thank you for understanding, Jamie." Pharah smiled back and pecked his cheek.
Downstairs, Ana had her feet up on the coffee table and shared her peanut butter scones with her granddaughter.
"When are mom and daddy coming back?" asked the little girl.
"Oh.. they'll be back soon, Young one." Ana chuckled and rubbed her head, "And they'll be happier than before."