She groaned as her eyes fluttered open, a bunch of confused and amused faces looking out at her. She jumped a little, their staring was startling. Her head was aching, her body numb. She barely had time to take in her surroundings. "Morning!" her friend, Emily exclaimed with a wide grin. Janine rolled to her side, muttering a swear word. Was it all a dream? Did she get drunk last night or something? What... What happened?
Somehow the events were all blurry. Janine tried to backtrack the event.
She remembered walking in on Danny. He cheated on her! But after that.. Nothing. Maybe she cried herself to sleep. She figured this was possible. But something that was tugging at the back of her mind told her it wasn't. Told her it wasn't right at all. Something else happened. Something she couldn't put her finger on. She shuddered the thoughts away, not in the mood to deal with it.
Janine forced herself into a sitting position. She was surprised to find a bunch of her friends in her room still staring down at her. "Am I having a party?" she asked tiredly, rubbing her eyes. She looked down and noticed she was wearing the same dress from last night.
Emily laughed with others and shrugged.
"We just wanted to check up on you." She said gently.
Janine smiled to herself, it was nice to have supportive friends. She wasn't exactly close to many of them, apart from Emily. But they were pretty good friends. They were all dhampirs. The girls shared a similar short, petite body like hers. But their curves were a little different. The boys were all musclier, many with 6 packs they had gained through enduring years of training. Somehow, she got along with Dhampir more then Moroi. There was no tension between dhampirs and they were all pretty easy going. Most of all, they were like her, they understand what it was like.
"I'm good. Now get your asses out of here so I can take a shower."
Some of the guys whistled and one made a sexual comment about wanting to stay and watch. She slapped him lightly on the shoulder and promised to meet them all for breakfast.
She showered quickly and got dressed, her head still throbbing in pain. Seriously, what did she do last night? Slam bricks into her head?
She wondered off to one of the hidden cafes in the court were she had promised to meet the her friends for breakfast. One of the many benefits of her dating a royal - well, dated - was to get to enjoy all the cool hidden places at the court. In turn, she showed them to her dhampir friends. She could never get too close to the moroi. Funny, she was around them most of the time, whole of her life. Yet she didn't feel as comfortable with them like she did with dhampirs. Despite the fact she is always flirting and joking with said moroi.
She forced herself to face the rest of the day - even though her head never stopped hurting. The newly trained guardians were expected to just lounge around court for the next couple of days while they await to get their assignments. There wasn't much to do that was open to dhampirs like her. But they managed to have a couple of good nights.
There was something she couldn't get off her mind what was happened that night. She tried to push it off her head, with no such luck. She attempted to recall the events once more. She saw Danny again... Then... Then what? What did she do?
She remembered Abe of all the sudden... Did she see him again? She must have. She remembers his express, once flirty and fun and the other dark and angry. But nothing in between that. She shook her head quickly. She had to find him.
"Hey Janine - I heard you talked to Ibrahim Mazur last night?" Emily sort of asked her at breakfast. Janine hesitated. She didn't' t ell anyone about that.
"Yeah... I did." she said, hesitating a little with her answer. At least Janine thought it was last night.
"I also heard he wanted you for a guardian!" someone else chipped in. She wondered how they knew that, too. She wasn't allowed to say anything about it. But things have a way of getting out. They all wanted to know the details of what happened between them. They were all going to be assigned and go all over the word. Janine knew she had what they didn't. A choice. Of choosing weather she wanted to guard him or not. Despite her marks, it wasn't guaranteed she was going to get a royal. Many from other schools got higher marks then she did. If she was going to guard some random, it may as well be Abe. Because from what she remembers he was alright.
Or was he? Why was her stomach twisting at the mention of his name? Janine dodged the questions from her friends and after breakfast She culched her stomach as she limped down the hall in the court to were someone directed her to Abe's room. Janine knew if she wanted answers he'll be the one to give it to her. She knocked on the door with no such luck.
She spend the rest of the day describing him to people and asking if they have seem him and knocking on random doors. She continued on with her search, looking and looking. She searched pratically everywhere.
Finally she was exhausted, she plopped down on a bench outside some of the building. At least searching was distracting her from the horrible ache in her stomach and head. She made a mental note to ask one of the royals she has hooked up with and knows that he loves to party if he can give her some aspirin.
Janine gets up, determined to look again and this time to find him. She makes her way into the court hallway that is filled with rooms once more. Suddenly, the headache attacks her again. Stronger then it felt before. A yap escaped her lips. She sighs and leans against the wall to catch her breath.
Janine places a hand on her forehead, massaging it. Then she looks down, deep in thought.
"That's it." she tells herself. She gives up. She was tired - oh so tired. All she wanted to do was go back to sleep from the moment she has woken up. There was no sign of Abe anywhere. She kicked the air in frustration.
"Jay?"
Her busy with other things has given her a break from grieving over Danny. She barely thought of him today. Janine bits her lip hard at the voice that spoke, and then slowly brings her head up to face him. He had gorgeous pale blue eyes that ran through his family tree. It was the first thing her eyes came into contact with when she looked up.
She straightened herself up, pulling on her guardian mask and removing herself from the wall.
"Hi." She said weakly, she felt tempted to add his last name to the mix, but didn't. Although Janine would've loved to see his flinch at her choice of words.
He leaned against the wall she was on a second ago and crossed his arms over his chest. They stand in silence for awhile. A bunch of whispering guys and giggling girls stopped to watch, but when Janine glances their way they quickly turn away and pretending to be doing something important or be deep in a conversation with someone. People whom had heard about their breakup pass by and stare too. She hated it. Hated the way people did this to her when they should just mind their own damn business. Danny, on the other hand, didn't seem to mind all that much.
Finally, Danny cleared his throat and turned to her. They stood only inches apart. They were so used to standing this close together it didn't even seem odd to her anymore. "Jay..." he breathed, looking at her face and then quickly down at her body before meeting her eyes again.
"I'm really sorry."
"You should be." she snapped.
Emotions she held back hit her again. Waves of mixed feelings practically knocking her over. She knew she had to let it go eventually. But because she knew that he wasn't hers anymore she wanted to hold onto him, tighter then before.
She was hurt, her pride was hurt. But she still longed him, the same way he did to her. Janine still liked him and was attracted to him. Even though he cheated on her... He was a good person. He was nice. She knew he was. Although she hated to admit it.
"I know. And I am... I just.."He ran a hand through his thick locks, unable to put his thoughts into words. "I was drunk. I didn't know what came over me." He paused to briefly to look at her again. "You know that I would never really do that to you, Jay." he whispers. They were close, oh, so close. If she moved every so slightly their bodies would press together and lips would touch.
"I'm so sorry." he said again, softly.
They were hugging all of the sudden, arms around each other in a tight embrace. She doesn't even know how that happened, whether she hugged him first or he hugged her. But it didn't matter at that moment. She rested her head against his shoulder and his grip on her tightened. Danny's lips nuzzled her ear. "It'll never happen again." He whispered.
She was a lile confused, did he want her back? She was a little proud to take him back but she wanted to be with him all of the sudden. She felt empty all day as if something was missing. She needed someone to make her whole again. To complete her.
She pulls away.
"It'll be different this time." He promises her, grabbing a hold of her hand.
Tears threaten to come out. Will it? She wanted to ask. Will it really be different this time around?
She shifted her weight, shifted her options. Finally she gave in. She knew Danny, he was sweet. It'll be different this time.
She made the first move in acceptance, lowering her lips to his.
His arms wrap around her waist and she wrapped hers around his neck. They didn't care they were in a hallway. They just kept kissing and kissing and kissing. Hungry for more each time.
He eventually pulls away, panting and smiles at her. She blinks at him, feeling all of the sudden uneasy and uncertain at what just happened.
"You wanna..." He starts, trailing off.
She raised one eyebrow at him.
"You wanna go back to my room?" He suggests, moving closer once more. His lips pressed against her neck. She felt his fangs, not biting her but just pressing softly against her. She smiles in daze. She had given blood once. It was a wonderful feeling. Yet she hesitates. It was dirty. worse then dirty. Even if it's giving blood when your not having sex. If anyone ever found out.. She felt so disgusted with herself for ever enjoying it. For wanting more.
Pain still shot through her. He still hurt her, she was still hurt and it wasn't only her pride anymore. Plus, there was no way she was lowering herself to be a blood whore. The thought sent a shiver down her spine. That one time... She was drunk. She didn't know what she was doing and the moroi guy had taken advantage of her. She was only a teenager, after all. Thankfully he didn't tell anyone. But she still remembers the high buzz feeling from the feeding. The wonderful bliss that she got from it.
"C'mon, Jay." He whispers into her ear. "You know you want it."
It'll be different this time.
"I-"
From behind Danny, another per of eyes catch hers and hold her gaze. They were a dark colour, one she couldn't make out from the distance. They were either dark brown or black. The figure walked towards her, something about the way he moved seemed oddly familiar. She trembles. Where has she seen this person before?
Their eyes met again, he was standing much closer now. A coal black color piercing into her brown eyes stirs something inside of her.
She gasps in realization, stumbling back.
A/N OMG GUYS JUST 4 MORE DAYS LEFT UNTIL LAST SACRIFICE! I dunno about you guys but I'm bursting with happiness. I cannot wait for last book to come out already. Aww though I'm really sad It's ending. Excuse my obession. And BTW sorry for not updating in ages I was busy with my exams last month and was nanowrimo (over 60,000 words!)
Review? :D