As the Outcast Hears
~Alyx POV
I turned back to the bed I had been in. I still didn't know for how long. At the foot of it lay the one dress I owned, a green cotton one that had been my mothers, and a letter, presumably from Erik.
Dear Mademoiselle Reyer,
I am sorry you must wake up under such circumstances, confusing as I'm sure they must be. I assure you that no harm will come to you here. Indeed I brought you here specifically to prevent such an occurrence.
I apologize for not being here when you awake, but this most likely means that I am either sleeping myself, or preparing something for this very eventuality. In any case, I hope you will not be afraid to be here. It is very nice to have some company.
I remain, good mademoiselle,
Your obedient servant,
O.G.
I smiled as I read the note. It was very sweet and very kind of him to do this for me. I folded it up and held it to my chest before putting it back down and changing into the dress.
After I was dressed I slipped the note into the bodice of my dress and went to the mirror that hung on the wall to pull my longer-than-usual hair back in its normal cord. When I saw how like the pictures of my mother when she was younger I looked I stopped though and decided to leave it down for once. I shook my hair out and decided to go find Erik.
When I found him he was sitting in front of a magnificent pipe organ. He looked like he was thinking so I moved quietly until I sat down next to him. "What are you thinking about?"
He jumped a little then turned and smiled at me. "A musical piece I've been working on for about a year now."
I smiled. "Really? Nothing like Don Juan?"
"No, not on such a large scale. Similar purpose though." He stopped and stood up. "You've been asleep for three days, you must be hungry." He led me to a small table set with some cold cuts of meat and a slice of bread. "I'm sorry, it's not much."
I shook my head. "No, it's fine. Thank you. This is very kind of you."
He smiled. "It's nothing."
I ate quickly, I was ravenous. When I finished I pushed away. "Why do all of this for me? Why bring me down here?"
He had sat down some time ago, but I hadn't noticed; as intent on the food as I was. "I...I've been watching you since you were refurbishing your room and I heard you singing. I...I thought now would be a good time to...intervene." He seemed embarrassed about watching me.
I smiled at him. "Thank you for intervening. If you hadn't I'd probably be dead." I reached out and lay my hand on his. "So you've been watching me all this time? I redid my room over a year ago. Fortunately it wasn't burned by the fire, but I couldn't live in it for years while they were rebuilding the place."
"Yes. I...I was wandering the old passage ways that riddle the Opera House and found my way to your mirror. I heard you sing for the first time then. It was...beautiful. I wondered how I could not have heard it before if you've been at the Opera House long."
I nodded. "Very long. At least it seems so sometimes. My parents died in an accident when I was about ten, that was seven years ago. I came here to live with my uncle, my mother's brother. I talked him in to letting me work in the stables. This was before M. Lachenel turned into a drunk of course." I stopped. "I'm sorry, I must be boring you terribly."
He shook his head. "No, not at all. I was merely wondering...would you mind singing with me, just this once?"
I smiled. "It would be an honor Erik. But you make it sound like I won't be coming back. Is this true?"
He looked started. "No, not if you want to. But I must ask you, when you do come back, to wait for me at your mirror, the passages can be...treacherous."
"Alright. I promise." He nodded and offered me his hand, gently leading me over to the pipe organ. He pulled one of the softer chairs over for me to sit in, which I was thankful for since I felt the bruise on my back very keenly after sitting for so long.
He begins to play the finale song from Don Juan and I smiled, I had always loved this song, and to be singing it now with him was wonderful beyond imagining.
"You have come here
in pursuit of
your deepest urge,
in pursuit of
that wish,
which till now
has been silent,
silent . . .
I have brought you,
that our passions
may fuse and merge -
in your mind
you've already
succumbed to me
dropped all defenses
completely succumbed to me -
now you are here with me:
no second thoughts,
you've decided,
decided . . .
Past the point
of no return -
no backward glances:
our games of make-believe
are at an end . . .
Past all thought
of "if" or "when" -
no use resisting:
abandon thought,
and let the dream
descend . . .
What raging fire
shall flood the soul?
What rich desire
unlocks its door?
What sweet seduction
lies before
us . . .?
Past the point
of no return,
the final threshold -
what warm,
unspoken secrets
will we learn?
Beyond the point
of no return . . ."
I took a deep breath, his voice was intoxicating. "You have brought me
to that moment
where words run dry,
to that moment
where speech
disappears
into silence,
silence . . .
I have come here,
hardly knowing
the reason why . . .
In my mind,
I've already
imagined our
bodies entwining
defenseless and silent -
and now I am
here with you:
no second thoughts,
I've decided,
decided . . .
Past the point
of no return -
no going back now:
our passion-play
has now, at last,
begun . . .
Past all thought
of right or wrong -
one final question:
how long should we
two wait, before
we're one . . .?
When will the blood
begin to race
the sleeping bud
burst into bloom?
When will the flames,
at last, consume
us . . .?"
We both turned to look at each other at exactly the same moment, our eyes locking for the final duet part. We sang in perfect unison, my voice not quite as high as Christine's perhaps, but still singing in perfect harmony with his. "Past the point
of no return
the final threshold -
the bridge
is crossed, so stand
and watch it burn . . .
We've passed the point
of no return . . ." I knew what came next and I moved to get up. He caught my hand gently in one of his though.
I heard him singing softly, under his breath.
"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime ...
Lead me, save me from my solitude ...
Say you want me with you, here beside you ...
Anywhere you go let me go too -"
I smiled and picked up the last line, the one he was hesitating to sing, replacing Christine's name with his.
"Erik, that's all I ask of you."
He let go of my hand and I was afraid that I had gone too far, let him know my feelings too soon. I stood and whispered to him, "I'm sorry." Without another word I went back to the room he had given me and lay down on it crying.
~Erik POV
I sat at the organ, waiting for Alyx to finish changing when she sat down next to me." What are you thinking about?" Her voice was soft, as if she was hesitant to disturb me.
To my shame I jumped slightly, startled." A musical piece I've been working on for about a year now."
She smiled gently. "Really? Nothing like Don Juan?"
"No, not on such a large scale. Similar purpose though." I stopped quickly, surely she knew that one of the main purposes of Don Juan was to show my love for Christine." You've been asleep for three days, you must be hungry." I got up and led her to my small kitchen, I had laid out some meat and bread for her while she dressed. "I'm sorry, it's not much."
She shook her head, seemingly amazed that I was doing this." No, it's fine. Thank you. This is very kind of you."
I smiled at her, she made it remarkably easy to smile. "It's nothing."
I sat down with her while she ate. She did so very quickly. When she was done she looked at me. "Why do all of this for me? Why bring me down here?"
I was a little embarrassed to admit this. I didn't necessarily have to but I felt like I owed her the truth. "I...I've been watching you since you were refurbishing your room and I heard you singing. I...I thought now would be a good time to...intervene."
She smiled kindly at me. I thought at the time that she smiled more at me than everyone I had ever known combined, even my mother. "Thank you for intervening. If you hadn't I'd probably be dead." She reached out and lay her hand on my hand that was on the table. "So you've been watching me all this time? I redid my room over a year ago. Fortunately it wasn't burned by the fire, but I couldn't live in it for years while they were rebuilding the place."
"Yes. I...I was wandering the old passage ways that riddle the Opera House and found my way to your mirror. I heard you sing for the first time then. It was...beautiful. I wondered how I could not have heard it before if you've been at the Opera House long." I knew why though. Before I had been infatuated with Christine. I would never have worked though, she thought I was a monster, like everyone else.
She nodded. "Very long. At least it seems so sometimes. My parents died in an accident when I was about ten, that was seven years ago. I came here to live with my uncle, my mother's brother. I talked him in to letting me work in the stables. This was before M. Lachenel turned into a drunk of course." She stopped. "I'm sorry, I must be boring you terribly."
I shook my head gently, I actually was enjoying getting to know her in a normal way. "No, not at all. I was merely wondering...would you mind singing with me, just this once?"
I smiled. "It would be an honor Erik. But you make it sound like I won't be coming back. Is this true?"
I was startled, and I know it showed. I was surprised that anyone, especially her, would want to come back down here. "No, not if you want to. But I must ask you, when you do come back, to wait for me at your mirror, the passages can be...treacherous."
"Alright. I promise."
I nodded and offered her my hand to lead her to the organ. I brought one of the softer chairs I had for her to sit in, knowing she would be feeling her bruises by now. I played Point of No Return from Don Juan. She knew the song by heart.
She got up to leave when she thought the song was over but I grabbed her hand gently, keeping her in her seat. I sang the next part under my breath, a little afraid of what she would do if she heard. "Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime ...
Lead me, save me from my solitude ...
Say you want me with you, here beside you ...
Anywhere you go let me go too -"
She smiled gently and sang the line I was hesitating on, but not quite as I had expected. "Erik, that's all I ask off you."
I was so surprised I let go of her hand. How could someone like her love someone like me? She mistook my surprise for rejection and stood. She whispered "I'm sorry" and left. I sat there for a moment, utterly unsure what to do.