Hey hey hey! Gotta keep this short cuz freshman year is wrapping up and I gotta embrace what's left of it before finals start next week! First of all, wow! I never expected such a positive reaction to this story, but now it has the most followers and second most favorites out of all of my stories! I haven't had this much success for a story since my first Treasure Planet story (which still holds the record at 84 favorites), but that was so long ago that I forgot what it felt like. And because y'all have given me the gift of self-confidence, I'd like to give y'all a little gift, too: VIRTUAL COOKIES FOR EVERYBODY!
Shortbread cookies for my new followers: tiggytickle, Batmanfood, Girl-of-1000-fandoms, Diana yapi112, Gabriel Nightingale, SleepAroundTheClock, Akatsuki Yukihara, heichou, mayaswaggztvdtwilight123, Georgiek61, everHermione, walisi, booksareforescaping, enchantress99, xoMyName, FieryCaptainSpiderSanta, patricia. bd. 35, Diditop, xMakaix, Gabbygirl317, charlielou1241, Doggygirl1, SkullKey4758
Sugar cookies for my new favoriters: SleepAroundTheClock, Akatsuki Yukihara, 1, heichou, mayaswaggztvdtwilight123, fall1ng4u, everHermione, walisi, Clemences-are-so-sexy, xoMyName, FieryCaptainSpiderSanta, patricia. bd. 35, KiddJonesTheQueen, 4eveaquite, Floatingsticks, charlielou1241, Doggygirl1
Snickerdoodles for my new reviewers: gothicpoet0615, Shadow Quil, SleepAroundTheClock (extra sprinkles on top for your sweet message about my personal life because that "pathetic mixed signals guy" may be a dang good kisser but he has led me on for the last time), FieryCaptainSpiderSanta, Brianna
Disclaimer: I've officially declared my major in communication studies - cue the applause - so now I'll have the education to communicate that I don't own "Now You See Me"
*Thursday, February 6, New York City, New York*
Merritt was sprawled out on the couch of the somewhat-improved apartment provided by The Eye. After a long day, that couch was calling to Merritt's psychic senses. He had just settled down for a nice afternoon nap when he heard the apartment door slam...along with a long string of Gaelic obscenities.
"So...how'd the meeting with Artie go?" Merritt asked casually.
Ember glared at the mentalist before she angrily flung her purse on the kitchen counter.
"I'll take that as a 'not so good'," Merritt guessed.
Ember stormed over; shoved Merritt's feet off the couch, letting them drop to the floor; and flopped down beside him. "If I have to listen to that man crack a joke about the Irish one more time..." Ember's fingers twitched like they were itching to wrap around the throat of the Horsemen's new benefactor.
"Um, didn't he notice you were Irish?" Merritt questioned suspiciously. "I mean, that's kinda the reason we sent you. You UKers gotta stick together, am I right?"
The blonde girl forced a grin. "Right...and if you actually picked up a history book or a newspaper once in a while, you'd know that the real Ireland is NOT part of the UK!"
"Since when?"
Ember slapped the balding man upside the head, knocking off his fedora and causing him to wince. "Since always!"
Merritt managed to catch his hat before it hit the floor. "And yet he's still funding our show so clearly you're doing something right."
Ember quickly stood up from the couch and tangled her hands in her hair as she began pacing furiously around the apartment. "Every time I talk to Tressler, I feel like I've sold my soul to the Brits!" Ember's brogue grew stronger as she launched into another tirade. "I can actually hear me Granda screaming from the grave! I might as well just paint me-self orange and join those traitors in Northern Ireland!"
"Aw!" Merritt cooed. "Sounds like somebody's kilt is on a wee bit too tight."
Ember growled.
"Well you better hurry up and loosen it," Merritt continued as he pushed himself off the couch and ruffled Ember's (now longer) hair playfully. "After all, Saint Patrick's day is next month and we wouldn't want to miss you doing your little leprechaun jig." Merritt held his hands behind his back and started jumping and shuffling like an Irish Step dancer...a really bad Irish Step dancer.
Surprisingly, Ember didn't explode like Merritt expected. Instead, she smirked impishly - just like a leprechaun - and snapped her fingers.
Merritt's fedora suddenly set on fire. He freaked out, flung his hat to the ground, and stomped out the flames. "Okay...I'll admit it...didn't see that one coming."
At that moment, the front door opened - much more quietly than last time - and Jack strolled inside.
"Whoa! Wh-What happened here?" Jack inquired as he noted the burnt crisp of a hat on the floor.
Ember chuckled and crossed her arms over her chest. "Merritt learned that I fight fire with fire."
Jack laughed along. "After over ten months, you'd think he'd know that already."
"Guess he's just a slow learner," Ember joked. "No wonder he's so much older than the rest of us."
"Ooh burn!" Jack exclaimed before the two young adults did their signature handshake.
"Har dee har har," Merritt replied humorlessly. "Enjoy your fun while it lasts. I have a feeling that pretty little smile's gonna drop in about three...two...one."
As if on cue, Jack's cell phone started ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket and grinned like a lovesick puppy dog when he saw the caller ID. Sure enough, the corners of Ember's mouth dropped from a smile into a scowl. Jack's dopey grin could only mean that the person on the other end of the line was...
"Veronica, h-hi!" Jack greeted eagerly. He mouthed the word 'sorry' to Ember before he went into the guys' bedroom to take the call.
Ember spun around to face the mentalist. "Why do you enjoy trying to make me miserable?!"
"Why do you enjoy trying to roast my head like a marshmallow?" the balding man countered.
"Touché."
Merritt returned to his napping position on the couch, picked up the remains of his fedora from the floor, and tilted it over his eyes. Meanwhile, Ember gazed in the direction of the guys' room and sighed softly.
"Ya know, the only you'll get your point across to Jackie is to dress up like Avril Lavigne and start singing 'Girlfriend'," Merritt commented without even opening his eyes.
Ember glared at the older man. "First of all, the fact that you even know that song is very disturbing. And second of all, I don't know what you're talking about."
"You can lie to yourself all you want, but you can't lie to a mentalist...or to anybody with eyes"
Ember scoffed. "Clearly that fire burned through to your brain because that's just a bunch of rubbish."
"Deny it all you want. All I'm saying is that I'm seeing some pretty..." Merritt smirked mischievously, "naughty thoughts in that precious little head of yours."
"Actually, those would be your thoughts from your head," Ember retorted. "My relationship with Jack is completely platonic."
"Mhmm," Merritt mumbled, not convinced at all.
"I'm serious!" the Irish girl insisted. "Jack and I are just friends. We tell each other everything."
Merritt lifted up the brim of his hat and arched his eyebrow skeptically. "Everything?" he challenged, referring to Ember's past employment.
Ember chewed her lip nervously. "Okay, maybe not everything...but we're still best friends."
Merritt dropped his fedora back over his eyes. "Then why do you act so jealous every time the Veronica-issue comes up?"
"Because Jack deserves so much better than that...that..." Ember's face pinched up like she was trying to find the right words to describe that she-devil.
"If you're gonna start ranting again, can you at least do it in English this time?" Merritt requested in a chipper voice. "Not that I don't enjoy listening to the language of drunk Irish sailors, but I don't feel like looking up a translation later."
Ember scowled. She certainly had a few choice words for Merritt...but Jack chose that moment to walk in, saving Ember from having to wash her mouth out with soap later.
"Sorry about that, guys," Jack apologized as he slid his phone back into his pocket. "So, what'd I miss?"
"Merritt was just being a perv," Ember chirped.
Merritt shoved his hat aside and gave the blonde girl an expression that said, 'Hey! Why're you throwing me under the bus?!'
"Then again, what else is new?" Ember added with a side glare.
At that, Merritt shrugged in surrender and returned to his nap, knowing he couldn't exactly protest that one.
"Anyway," Jack spoke up, eager to change subjects, "Ember, I-I was won-wondering if, uh, you had any plans this afternoon?"
"Nope, free as a bird."
"Great!" Jack replied with a smile. "Me and Veronica's anniversary is coming up next week and I wanna get her something really special, and since you're a girl, I figured you would know what I should look for."
Ember's eyes lost their sparkle. "Um, next week?"
"Yep!"
Ember glanced over at Merritt, who had sat up from the couch. The two of them shared a sympathetic look.
"As in the week of Valentine's Day?" Ember questioned.
"Uh huh!"
"As in the same week we're going to be in Paris?"
Jack's face darkened in realization. "I'm dead."
"Considering you're tarot card was Death, seems appropriate, doesn't it?" Merritt teased from the couch.
Ember hissed at the balding man.
But Jack continued like he hadn't even heard Merritt. "What am I gonna do?! I've already neglected Veronica so much this year! She's gonna kill me!"
"And that is why I don't have a girlfriend," Merritt spoke up.
Ember raised an eyebrow, just like Merritt had done earlier, and looked down at the man on the couch. "Yeah," she drawled sarcastically, "that's why."
"Guys, be serious! How am I supposed to tell Veronica that I won't even be in the country for our anniversary?!" Jack panicked
"Like this," Merritt proposed as he stood up from the couch and approached Jack. "Wait until you're on the plane, about to take off, and then text her and say 'Hey babe. Gotta jet to Paris. Happy anniversary. Love, Jack'. That way you have to turn your phone off before she can call you back to scream at you and you'll be a whole ocean away from the scorned woman."
Both Jack and Ember's jaws dropped to the floor. How could Merritt be twice their age yet twice as oblivious when it came to relationships?
"No, you see, this is why you don't have a girlfriend," Ember emphasized.
Merritt replied with his troublemaking smirk. "You're absolutely right! Jack, this is a conversation that you need to have in person. I want you to go over to Victoria's-"
"Veronica," Jack corrected.
"-Veronica's place right now and tell her the bad news, but soften the blow by offering to celebrate your anniversary early!" Merritt finished as he flung Jack's leather jacket over the young man's shoulders and pushed him toward the front door.
"Wow," Ember responded. "I never thought I'd say this, but great plan, Merritt."
Merritt looked back to Ember and his silver eyes glinted mischievously. "And it gets even better...because you're going to go with him!"
"WHAT?!" Ember cried out.
"If you're there, then Valerie-"
"Veronica!"
"-Veronica will know that Jackie boy has a legitimate excuse for abandoning her."
"Then why don't you just go with him?" Ember questioned pointedly.
"I got plans," Merritt answered nonchalantly.
Before Ember could even begin to touch that pile of malarkey, Jack swooped in to rescue Merritt.
"Come on, Em," the brunette boy pleaded. "Y-You've already saved me once with Veronica with your quick-thinking. If I'm with you, she'll know I'm not going off to spend Valentine's Day with another girl."
Ember felt like she had just been punched in the stomach.
"Ouch!" Merritt muttered under his breath.
Jack suddenly realized what had come out of his mouth. "W-Wait, Em, you know that's not what I meant!" Jack babbled when he saw the crestfallen look on Ember's face. He took the blonde girl's hands in his own and squeezed them tightly as he stared into her eyes. "Please, Ember, won't you do this for me?"
Looking into those hazel eyes, Ember could feel her resolve cracking. "Fine."
Jack threw his arms around Ember, lifted her up off the floor, and spun her around. "Ember, you're a lifesaver!" He gave her a brotherly peck on the cheek before racing to the closet to grab her coat.
Meanwhile, Ember slowly pivoted around to face her bald associate. "I'll get you for this," she threatened, venom dripping from her every word as Jack walked up with Ember's coat.
"Have fun," Merritt chirped innocently. "Tell Vivian I say hi."
"It's Veronica!" Jack and Ember yelled back.
As the two youngest Horsemen headed out, Ember noticed the sound of Merritt making kissy noises behind her. The blonde girl snapped her fingers and the last thing she and Jack heard as they closed the door was the middle-aged magician squealing like a little girl because, once again, his fedora had burst into flames.
*{0}*
After what felt like an eternal subway ride, Jack and Ember arrived in Queens. As Jack led the Irish girl through the foreign streets, Ember couldn't help but feel like she had teleported back to Vegas with all the women in skimpy clothes throwing themselves at men in sporty cars. Finally, after passing over a dozen apartment buildings just as bad as the one the Horsemen lived in, Jack stopped in front of one of the more ostentatious buildings.
"Should've known that gold-digger would live here," Ember mumbled under her breath.
"You say something?" Jack asked as he opened the door for the blonde girl.
"Nothing," Ember immediately denied. "I was just thinking about how in the time since we've gotten off the subway, we've passed enough crimes to keep the police in my hometown busy for a fortnight."
"Vegas?" Jack questioned in confusion.
Ember chuckled. "My real hometown, Killarga...County Leitrim...the place where I got this accent."
Jack laughed along with her before realizing that this was the first time in the almost eleven months they had known each other that Ember actually named the place where she grew up...and judging by the way her skin paled, Ember had just realized that, too. The two of them stopped in front of the elevator and Jack gently pressed the up button.
"So what's it like there?" Jack inquired.
"Where?" Ember countered as she stared up above the elevator door, hoping he would forget.
"Killarga," Jack replied in a flawless Irish brogue.
Ember's eyebrows shot all the way up to her hairline as she gawked at the Brooklyn native. She knew Jack was a good mimic, but she didn't know he was that good. Jack tried to stifle his amusement, but the look on Ember's face was too much and he burst into laughter just as the elevator door opened up to reveal three little old ladies. They fell to the ground and panted heavily as they began to berate the reckless youngsters.
"Young man, why are you-"
"-trying to scare people to death?!"
"Disgraceful! Do you enjoy trying to give heart attacks to your elders?!"
"Trying?! Speak for yourself, Sylvia!"
"In our day, young people knew to respect their elders!"
"Your parents should be ashamed of you!"
Once the older women finished their tongue-lashing, they shuffled out the front door, still muttering about the incivility of today's youth as they dusted off their pastel wool coats and straightened their curls.
"You certainly have a way with women, Yank," Ember teased with a smirk as she strolled into the elevator.
"And you have a way with avoiding my questions," Jack quipped before tapping the button for the eighth floor.
"Fine," Ember sighed exasperatedly, "but only because you pronounced Killarga correctly."
"I learned from listening to the best," Jack replied with a smile.
Ember giggled as the doors opened up and the two magicians strolled down the hallway. Jack knocked on the door of room 8G. They heard an exasperated squeal from the other side.
"It's about time, Cam! My shower's still broken!"
The door flung open to reveal a girl in a fluffy pink bathrobe with matching slippers, hair tied up in curlers, and a green face-mask.
"You were supposed to be here-" Veronica froze the second she saw that her guest was not her landlord, but her boyfriend.
"Um, hey Veronica?" Jack greeted awkwardly.
"Jackie?!" Veronica squeaked before slamming the door in their faces. "What're ya doin' here?! You're s'posed to call me first if you wanna drop by unexpectedly so I can look perfect when ya surprise me!"
Ember furrowed her brow in confusion. "She does realize how dense she sounds, right?"
"Stay outta this, lepreb*tch!" Veronica screeched from the other side of the door.
"Lepreb*tch?!" Ember spat out. "Oh that is it! Move aside, Yank! I don't care if she's your girlfriend, I'm going to toss this prime example of New York's trashiest right where she belongs: on the curb!"
"WHAT?! Close your eyes, Jackie-poo! I don't want ya to see me like this when I rip that tramp's bleach-blonde hair out by its dark roots!"
"Did I say the curb?" Ember questioned innocently. "I meant the incinerator!"
"Girls, girls, stop!" Jack insisted. "Em, c-can you just give me a second?"
Ember was obviously still steaming, but she let out a deep breath and took a few steps down the hallway.
Jack turned back to the apartment. "Veronica, sweetheart, can you please just let me in? I don't care what you look like right now. There's something we need to talk about."
*{0}*
And so, while the two lovebirds had their little chat, Ember stood out in the hallway, leaning up against the wall while pretending to text somebody important so creepers on the floor wouldn't stop to hit on her. Suddenly, her phone began to ring for real.
"Yeah?" Ember greeted.
"How's it going over there?" Merritt asked innocently.
"Well, it's been about ten minutes and Veronica finally stopped screaming."
"That's good."
"But now she's moved on to smashing things and ignoring all the complaints from the neighbors," Ember added.
"...Sounds like she's taking the news pretty well, then."
"Definitely better than I expected," Ember chirped.
The sound of a slamming door echoed through the halls.
"Gotta go!" Ember quickly hung up the call and resumed her chillaxing position.
Jack dragged his feet behind him as he shuffled down the hallway. His clothes were torn and he had a soon-to-be black eye, a split lip, and a bloody nose.
"So...how'd it go?" Ember casually inquired without looking up from her phone.
"Sh-She dumped me."
*{0}*
Four things I would like to say:
1) apparently "chillaxing" is a real word according to autocorrect
2) Killarga is actually the town where my great-grandfather came from before immigrating to America and marrying my Irish immigrant great-grandmother and so on and so forth (like I'd actually tell you my full family tree)
3) I planned to take this chapter all the way up to the Vegas show, but considering it was this long before they even got to France, I figured I'd give you this part now and the rest after my exams...and hopefully before I start my summer job
4) I love y'all so much and - unlike the guy who invited me to be his date to his sailing club formal - I promise not to ignore you...so if you have any feedback or compliments in the form of reviews, I'm all ears