Chapter 4

When she wakes up and sees his face resting next to her on the pillow she feels warmth spread through her entire body, stretching to each limb and fingertip. For a second she wants to look for handcuffs, and almost giggles at the thought. She sees the clock on the bedside table over his shoulder and notices the alarm isn't going to go off for a few minutes. She looks at the man her arms have found their way around during the night, and is so thankful he's there with her.

She was surprised that he already knew her secret, but in reflection she realizes she should have put that together sooner. She should have known he wouldn't have been acting so out of character towards her if there hadn't been a good reason. It makes her heart clench that he assumed the worst of her, assumed she'd never love him in return.

Thank god Lanie had been at her house last night, thank god Lanie had given her the strength to tell Castle the truth. Hopefully last night was a step towards mending that friendship as well, Dr. Burke would be proud.

As she sees the clock tick closer to 8am, she realizes she couldn't have been asleep for even a total four hours, and yet she feels quite rested. The security of having Castle with her and knowing she has him in her life finally allowed her to get some sleep. The look on his face is so pure and innocent, almost childlike in a way, when compared to the distress he was portraying last night. She almost doesn't want to wake him up, and wishes she could just let him be at ease, here in her arms.

But she knows this man. She knows Castle and she knows he is the best father she has ever seen, so she knows how important it is that he goes home to talk to his daughter.

The alarm starts to beep, and she hastily leans over Castle's sleeping form to turn the retched thing off. It is only when she has found the snooze button that she looks down and sees his eyes wide open, and his face smiling up at her.

"Good morning," he says and she can see that somewhere in that grin is a statement about how much he likes waking up to her on top of him.

"Sorry, the clock is on this side," she tries to explain her location, and can't get through it without blushing.

"You never have to apologize for being on top of me Kate," he grins widely at her and cups her cheek with his hand, "except maybe when trying to escape a tiger, handcuffed together."

She giggles at his joke and leans down, pressing her lips gently against his. It seems this isn't enough for him this morning and she feels him roll her onto her back. She likes the feeling of him on top of her, likes the strength his embrace exudes as his lips press against hers and his tongue makes its way into her mouth. She can't help the breathy moan that escapes her body at the feel of him surrounding her and invading her this way.

God it's been a long time. It's been forever since she has been embraced by a man, and way too long since she has felt Castle's lips on hers. The soft, but sure pressure and control he displays with his lips and tongue makes her think about other places he could touch, other places he could kiss, and lick, and suddenly the feeling in her stomach turns from butterflies to lust.

At that thought she tenses, and he pulls away, hovering over her. There's a question in his gaze, and she knows he felt her body tense. She's having a hard time with words; the pressure of their upper bodies resting against each other and the passion in his eyes is far too distracting.

When she recovers enough of her self control, she grimaces, "Rick I want this, I want you, but I really don't think we have time right now," she says it quickly, hoping her tone conveys her reluctance to stop, because she would love to rip off her clothes, rid him of his boxers and spend the entire bed reacquainting herself with sex and learning the topography of his body, his very distracting, deliciously muscled body.

Recognition comes through his gaze, and she hates herself a little bit for having to put reality back into his life. He leans down and rests his forehead against her shoulder, "Can you believe I nearly forgot? Waking up with you is very distracting." He whispers this in her ear and she hates that she has to dial back her desire for him, even though it's for the greater good.

"I know Castle," she breaths deeply, "trust me, I want to stay in bed right now as much as you do, but we both know that Alexis needs to come first." She lets her hands trace his bare back, shoulders and arms. He leans onto an elbow so they can make eye contact and she sees not just lust in his gaze, but love, and she knows no man has ever looked at her that way.

"This is why I love you Kate," he smiles and she knows her face is stretched into a large grin, "one of the many reasons anyway. I certainly don't have time to get into that right now."

She feels her cheeks heat up at his implication, and can only say a few important words in return, "I love you too Rick."

His smile went from gentle to extreme at her words, and his eyes bounced with joy.

At that moment the alarm buzzed again, stupid five-minute snooze button, bringing them both back to reality.

"Okay. We have to get up, I need to call Espo, and we need to go to your house," she says this with enough conviction that he sits up and moves toward the edge of the bed to stand. She does the same on her side, and goes immediately to finding clothes for the day. Once gathered, she heads to the bathroom, leaving Rick in her room to change. Before she closes the door, she can't help herself and has to turn and tell him.

"For the record Castle, waking up with you is something I really want to get used to," she smiles almost nervously when she says it, but she's rewarded with his body moving towards her. Their height difference requires her to look up at him when he stands in front of her, and as he rubs his hands up and down her arms, he simply says, "me too Kate." With a quick kiss, he turns back to her room to put on his clothes and she heads into the bathroom to change.

When she looks at herself in the mirror she notices how much more alive her eyes look than they did yesterday. She smiles at her own reflection, and sets about quickly getting ready for the day. After re-doing her braid, brushing her teeth, putting on a light layer of makeup and changing into casual clothes, she reaches underneath the sink to grab a fresh toothbrush.

As she reenters her bedroom she takes a second to observe Castle, who is sitting on the edge of her bed much like he was before bed last night. He looks deep in thought, and she is hesitant to interrupt him. He glances up when he hears her rest against the doorframe, and she makes her way towards him. She sits next to him on her bed, resting her head against his shoulder and taking his hand.

"Do you want to talk about it before we go?" she asks, knowing he must have a million thoughts right now.

"Thanks, but I think I just need to get some answers," he pauses and his voice is shaky as he breathes out, "hopefully some good answers." She doesn't need him to say what he means; she knows completely what he means. No father hopes for his teenage daughter to be pregnant, let alone having sex. There is a certain level of "don't ask don't tell" when it comes to discussing sex lives between fathers and daughters, she knows that much from her own experience.

"Okay," she squeezes his hand gently and lifts her head from his shoulder. "I put a new toothbrush on the sink for you, if you want to clean up a bit."

She can see in his eyes that he wants to make a joke about this, but he stays silent and makes his way over to her bathroom. She calls after him, "I'm just going to go call Esposito. Meet you in the living room." He responds with a quiet "okay" and she grabs her phone off her nightstand.

Taking a personal day isn't something she does often, but that doesn't seem relevant right now. She has plenty of time off accumulated and she knows Ryan and Esposito can manage without her for a day. She quickly presses speed dial number 5 and is thankful that Esposito picks up immediately.

"Hey Espo, I just wanted to let you know I won't be in today. I'm taking a personal day," she says it quickly, wanting to hurry the phone call along so she can get her attention back to Castle.

"Everything okay Boss? I know this week has been…" he trails off and she can picture the look on his face, quiet, hesitant, protective, and it warms her.

"I'm okay, I just have a personal situation I need to tend to. I promise. If you guys need anything just call me, and if not I'll be in tomorrow," she assures him and is happy when his only response is, "you got it Beckett." She says her goodbye quickly and looks up just as Castle walks back into the room.

"Hey," Castle nods towards her phone, "you get it all sorted out?"

She smiles and nods, "Yeah, and with minimal inquisition too. Espo must be losing his touch." Her phone rings in her hand and she sees the caller ID indicate Lanie is calling, "Or maybe he's just getting someone else to do his dirty work," she says with a wink in his direction.

She answers the phone as he walks towards her and wraps her in an embrace. "Hello?" it comes out a bit muffled because her face is buried in his shoulder, but she'd have it no other way.

"Girl you okay? I know Castle was there last night and Javi just told me that you called and said you took a personal day. I swear if that boy went up there and hurt you I will kill him. I told him he better not be-" She cuts Lanie off before a full on rant can start, and the gentle caress of Castle's hands on her back tell her he heard every word.

"Lanie everything with me is okay. I'm fine, I promise. I'm better than fine actually. I'm standing here in the arms of the man I love and I have finally told him the truth," Beckett leans back and looks into Castle's eyes as she says this, watching as his eyes light up. There's a loud squeal that comes through the phone that draws her attention back to the device in her hand.

"So are you two taking a personal day to get rid of some of that unresolved sexual tension? Cause I gotta tell you girlfriend I don't know how you've held out this long. I can't even imagine not having sex in-" Blushing, Kate quickly cuts her friend off again, noting the intrigue in Rick's gaze and choosing for the moment to ignore it, "Lanie can you please remember that I'm standing close enough to Rick that he can hear every word you're saying?"

They both hear a laugh come through the phone, and Beckett decides to have her own fun, "And by the way, how did you find out I'm taking a personal day? Is there anything you'd like to tell me about a certain ex-boyfriend being at your house this early in the day?"

That quiets Lanie's laughter, and Beckett isn't surprised when Lanie responds, "He phoned me Kate, he isn't here."

Castle rolls his eyes, smiling, and she can tell he's enjoying watching her interact with her best girlfriend, "Sure, sure," she pauses to let her disbelief be clear, then adds, "Lanie I know we have a lot to talk about but I really do have to go. I did take a personal day for a reason, just not the one you've suggested."

Castle squeezes her hips and she smiles at him, "Can I call you later Lanie?"

"Girlfriend you better call me later. Now go and get some lovin' from writer boy. Let me know if we need to upgrade his status to man," Kate laughs out loud at that, and Castle grabs the phone out of her hand.

"I assure you Lanie my status is man," Kate smiles at this and kisses his cheek, low, near his mouth, "But we have to go. Kate will call you later." Kate leans into the mouthpiece and says her own goodbye, and Castle clicks the phone off. Dropping his hands to wrap them both around her waist.

She stands in his embrace for a few seconds, just staring up into his warm face. "Okay, we should go. And we should definitely grab coffee on the way," she says reluctantly, and sees his hesitation as well.

"Thank you Kate," she shakes her head, knowing he doesn't need to thank her, "I know you don't usually take days off work, but I really need you today."

She smiles at his admission, "Always Castle. Always."

His face brightens, and he can't help but think back to the night before when he actually considered that the six letters she just uttered meant nothing to her, and feel foolish. He kisses her gently, and leads her towards the door. Once they're both in their coats and shoes, he pauses before opening the door and turns back to her, "This really happened right?"

Kate can't help but smile at his words, butterflies warming her stomach as she nods, "It really happened."

With that they leave her apartment, hands entwined, ready to take on the next battle.