Disclaimer: Don't own Criminal Minds; no infringement of any type is intended; and no profit is being made. Just borrowing Derek and Penelope to give them a treat.

A/N: This group has done wonders for motivating my muse. The prompt was Cleaning and this is what came out. Hope you enjoy.

Gonna Clean That Man Right Outta My Life

By: Harlie

Penelope Garcia had a goal: to clean all traces of Kevin Lynch out of her life. She had a rule, when she broke up with a guy she wanted all traces of him out of her apartment within a week. However, due to back-to-back cases, it had been nearly five weeks and she had yet to free her home of the last vestiges of Kevin.

Granted, their break up was not a nasty one, so the desire to never see him again didn't factor into her desire to get the deed done. More than anything, it was simply so she'd feel ready to move on - once she was done cleaning, that is. To add insult to the whole cleaning endeavour, it was her first weekend off in weeks. While all the rest of her BAU family had plans to hang out and relax, she was alone with the memories of a three-year relationship now down the drain.

Needing to keep her spirits up as she got started on her bedroom, Penelope cranked her surround sound stereo system to as close to max as she dared and upped the bass. She could just feel a steady pulse under her feet and was thankful for an end unit so there was no one on the side closest to the main speakers to complain.

Penelope had just finished doing the "Conga" along with Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine, when she realized her top was completely plastered to her. A moment of contemplation as Technotronic began to "Pump Up the Jam" had her shedding her top and sweatpants. Flinging the garments in the direction of her bed, she lifted the box containing Kevin's meager assortment of belongings and headed for the bathroom.

By the time she was done scouring the shower walls and bathtub and cleaning the toilet, even her bra and panties were too soaked to feel comfortable.

"Why the hell not," she thought, and stripped those off as well, dumping them in the hamper before she grabbed the box and headed for the kitchen. She was dancing to "Footloose" with Kenny Loggins by the time she had balanced the box on a stool at the breakfast counter and had started in on the fridge.

Penelope cranked "Naughty Girls Need Love Too" and was singing her heart out with Samantha Fox, sweat streaming down her back, as she scrubbed at the fan over her range. As a result, she didn't hear a key in the lock to her door nor did she immediately pinpoint the source of the sudden rush of cool air as it hit her skin, immediately pebbling her nipples. She did, however, nearly fall off the counter when the music abruptly shut off and she looked over her shoulder to see none other than Derek Morgan, standing in her living room, staring at her like he'd never seen her before, but would gladly devour her as a meal.

"Oh, shit," Penelope whispered, as she lowered herself to the floor and searched for something to cover herself at the same time. "D, do you mind turning around so I can go put something on?"

Derek didn't speak. He remained staring at her instead as he moved closer to the breakfast bar separating the living room and kitchen areas.

"Derek please, I just need a few seconds –"

"No!" The forcefulness in his tone shocked her.

"What do you mean, no?" Penelope gave up and walked toward the opening into the kitchen, being mirrored the whole way by Derek on the living room side.

"No, Baby Girl. I know I don't say it to you often, but I'm saying it now."

"Derek, this is ridiculous. I clearly wasn't expecting you or anyone else for that matter or I would have been dressed." She'd reached the entryway, but so had Derek, and he wasn't budging.

"If the music weren't so loud, you'd have gotten my text saying I was coming over to help."

"Oh. But, Hot Stuff-"

"No, buts. I'm glad you didn't know," Derek said, as he grabbed the back of his Henley™ and yanked it over his head, and then tossed it away back into the living room.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Derek arched a brow then said, "I came to help you clean. Apparently you do that naked so…"

"D, please-" Penelope couldn't finish what she'd been about to say as her gaze locked with his. The expression currently on Derek's face she'd seen glimpses of in the years they'd known one another, but it held a whole new significance with her naked and Derek well on his way to being in the same state of undress.

"Please what, P," Derek asked, as he unbuckled his belt, popped the button on his jeans and shoved them down his legs, boxer briefs and all.

That was when Penelope realized that Derek was aroused. In fact, if they'd been in the military, she'd have to say Derek was showing her the utmost respect right now with his salute.

"Is that why you came here, Derek, in hopes of a booty call? That's new," Penelope knew her tone was caustic, but they had always been close, and as much as she loved and secretly wanted him, she wasn't going to sleep with him simply because he'd seen her naked and had gotten horny as a result.

Oddly, Derek smiled in response before he replied, "You know me far better than that, Baby Girl. Are you really surprised the sight of you, all naked and sweaty, took my mind off of being a good best friend helping you clean, and moved it firmly into thank God Lynch is history, now's our time instead?"

"Our time? You and me?"

"I love you, silly girl. So yes, it's our time! You, me and done for good."

"Oh, shit," Penelope whispered again, but this time as Derek closed the remaining distance between them, she wasn't concentrating on covering herself with anything other than him.

"I love you, too, D."

Penelope couldn't say who kissed whom. The last thing she remembered clearly was wrapping her arms around Derek's neck and the next they were kissing deeply as their tongues explored and memorized the contours of one another's mouths. The feel of his skin against her own felt like heaven. When Derek lifted Penelope and moved back into the kitchen to perch her on the edge of the counter, she had one last thought: she'd never have to worry about cleaning Derek out of her life.

The End.