Title: To Live As People

Chapter II: I'll Take Your Word, Part I

Chapter Summary: Gareth and Emma have a strange relationship & she's still reluctant to believe much else.

Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead, I especially do not own it's rightful (and lovely) characters/locations. I do own my own original characters however, as well as the written plot.

Notes: We've now ventured into chapter II! I hope that the ride so far has been enjoyable. I'm very excited to continue producing chapters, though I'm afraid I might lose some enthusiasm soon - as I tend to do, unfortunately - so I'm trying to write as many chapters as I can. This is a story that I really want to complete, as I've already got the ending sorted - one which I'm sure will be quite controversial. So far I've written up to chapter 10, though I'm waiting for more people to read before I roll them all out. Please remember to review, as they really do keep me writing, as well as keep the chapters coming. I've not had many reviews, so there very wanted when it comes to keeping the updates going.

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The fever lasted three days.

Gareth heated up one moment, and the next he was down in a chilled state of sickness. Emma stayed with him through a lot of it, via his request.

When he first asked her to sit with him, she'd been dazed and tired, all too easy to comply. Mary had been out with Alex checking the perimeter, and Gareth had been fever ridden and confused. She'd stayed with him because Mary asked her to, but it was him who wanted her company - any company.

She hadn't slept in almost two days and she was feeling more than a little fatigued. Her food rations were down as well. They were running low on food, Emma guessed that they'd have none in only three days, tops. Even with the vender food - which wasn't all too much - they were still too low. Water was even lower.

Alex had asked her about going on a run, but she'd been hesitant and that scared him away slightly. He liked her, she thought. He was anything but her type, so she steered mostly clear of being alone with him, in fear that he might ask something that she couldn't give and ruin the neutrality of their relationship. In all honesty she was waiting for Gareth to get better, to go with him.

Sometimes Gareth reminded her of Victor. Not overly, but there was something there in the way he spoke that triggered it. He wasn't a complete prick like Victor had been, but sometimes when he spoke to her she could hear him in his voice. When Vic was soft and they'd first met each other, before she knew any better of him. It still worried her, slightly.

He was sleeping now, curled up tightly in three blankets. Alex and her had - rather loudly and unpleasantly - taken the lounge down from upstairs and placed it in the main room. They'd done the same with three others from the opposite blocks; one for each of them.

She didn't like doing things with Alex. She didn't mind him, in fact she liked him, but when they had to work together she always got annoyed. He wasn't half as competent as Gareth and he pursued her guidance far too often. He wasn't stupid, but he just wasn't a leader.

The lounges were uncomfortable for Emma, not because they actually were confining but because they were too soft and cushioned. She'd become accustomed to the disagreeable lifestyle of sleeping on floors and huddling in small places.

One night a couple of days ago Mary had confessed to feeling uncomfortable with Emma's sleeping habits - or lack of. She hardly slept, and when she did it was in short bursts and upright positions, with a knife tucked into her hand. Mary said it worried her that she didn't trust them. Emma said it wasn't because of them, but refused to change her habits and get rid of the knife.

It was hard to be around people again, to realize that other people have their own motives and desires away from yours. It had been stone cold survival for so long, even before the outbreak Emma was always trying to get by on her own. Now she had become we. It had become harder to look out for herself, now that she felt strings forming to others. It reminded her of something.

When Emma was twenty-three she had gotten the news of a baby. She cried about it for weeks, and when Vic found out he'd yelled at her.

She'd lost her - Abby, she was going to name her - months later. The doctors had told her that she wouldn't be able to have children and that Abby was her little miracle. Vic told her that she was anything but, and made clear he wasn't sticking around to see her.

When the time came and she rushed herself to hospital, she didn't desire Vic in her life anyway. It was a fresh start, away from the drugs and the thrifting lifestyle. It was her and her daughter, and nothing else mattered.

When they'd permitted her to go home after it all happened; she'd screamed and cried. Her landlords kicked her out of her apartment after she trashed everything, throwing things and kicking them against windows and walls in anger and sadness; confusion.

But it was something she'd never forget; that feeling of protectiveness. Learning that there was something - someone - that was completely under her care. She'd learnt how to worry for another, how to nurture something besides herself.

Over the last three days she felt something similar. She felt as though she was some form of glue, keeping them all safe while Gareth couldn't. Protecting them.

It felt like some form of duty that she watched over them. The days had worn on and no matter how many times she denied it or argued with herself over it, it was getting too hard to disagree with the fact that she was starting to get attached.

The idea of them was something she needed. A thing to protect, to live for. She couldn't say why, and she didn't really want to think about it.

"Emma," Gareth's sleep stained voice startled her from her thoughts. She looked up towards him and noticed he'd propped himself up onto his elbows. "Where are they?"

"Checking the fences," she replied, standing up and making her way to him. "They're safe."

He nodded and coughed once, chest heaving with the movement. Emma strode past him and plucked up her bag, dropping it onto the table. She rummaged through for a moment before her hand grasped a bottled water, and she pulled it out.

"Here," Emma made her way back to him, handing it over. He took it without protest, too tired to argue over rationing.

He was better now, but sweat still beaded around his forehead and his body temperature seemed a bit lower than normal. Alex had been the same, until a few days ago when he was able to move around more. She supposed it was a waiting game now.

"Thanks," he said, handing it back.

"Keep it there, you might need it again and I'm not going to be serving you all day."

Gareth laughed, the small and worn out kind. "Sure."

The door creaked open, Mary and Alex stepping inside together. Gareth made a sound that reminded Emma of something disapproving and laid back down.

"All safe," Alex exclaimed, making way to the sofa and plopping down.

"No creepers?" Emma asked. Alex chuckled and she stared towards him. "Something funny?"

"Creepers," he repeated, smiling. "Why creepers? Roamers sounds better. No, wait- cold bodies sound better."

Emma rolled her eyes. "Call them whatever, I don't care."

Alex raised his eyebrows and held up his hands defensively. Emma saw him start to turn red and wondered if he thought she was offended.

She ignored it. "We need food."

It was Gareth who replied. "We can go out tomorrow. Head East and scout the area out, see what's there. I'll go with Emma."

"No," Emma said automatically, sighing with frustration. "I'll go with Alex."

"What?" Gareth snorted. "No."

"I don't wanna hear it," she wasn't suggesting. "You wanna die or something?"

"I'm fine now, alright?"

"The bloody hell is wrong with you? You've been sick and asleep all day."

Alex quickly cut in, sitting upright, then standing. "Hey, I'll go with Emma. What's the big deal, Gareth?"

He looked both antagonized and tired. "The big deal is you can't, alright? Alex, you can barely do anything half the time," his tone was unintentionally hurtful. "Besides, someone has to look after Mary and keep this place safe."

The room was silent. "Screw you, Gareth," Alex finally said, then moved towards the door, looking provoked.

"Look, I didn't mean it like that," Gareth called after him. "Alex!"

The door shut behind him assertively, leaving Gareth trying to get up. Mary moved over to him and tried to push him back down. He swatted away her pleading hands and tried to move past her lightly.

Emma walked over to the two and sighed heavily. "I'll get him."

"I can," Gareth said, his voice was half way between annoyed and indifferent. "He's being an idiot."

She'd already began walking to the door. "If I'm not back in five minutes, then come out."

Before either could reply, she was already closing the heavy wood into it's frame and climbing down the few short stairs. She could see Alex in the distance, sitting on D block's steps.

"I don't wanna talk," Alex said, when she was close enough.

"Don't have to," she replied casually, sitting beside him. "But it'll make for an awkward time, yeah?"

"Look I just - I get tired of Gareth's bullshit. He always does this. All that macho leader bullcrap. I know that I'm not like him, I can't survive like he can. I can survive though, I'm not useless."

"Sure," Emma responded, picking at the peeling paint of the step. "I know."

Alex scoffed. "Do you?"

"If you were useless you'd be dead."

A moment of silence went by before he spoke again. "But this really isn't living, is it?"

Emma wasn't sure what to say to that. In fact, she wasn't even sure what she thought of it. Living was breathing, right? Or was there some more deep psychological freedom needed to confirm life? She wasn't sure.

"Well shit, I don't know."

Alex scoffed out a laugh and breathed in. "Me neither."

"Let's go inside, yeah? I'm freezing."

"Gareth is probably pissed," he sighed, standing up.

"Isn't he always?"

"Not always," he paused a moment, as if considering his next words carefully. "Not with you."

Emma scoffed. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

She wondered why he was saying this, besides working outside Gareth and her hadn't spent that much time together, excluding when he was sick. She and Gareth had spent a lot of time together then, but he was fever ridden and she was too tired to function properly anyway. "I'll take your word for it."

He didn't reply until they were both standing to leave. "There was this girl a couple years ago. Gareth really liked her. She was from his work. He'd never admit it, but he gave her looks and joked around with her more than anyone. It was like he was... better with her, kinda, than with anyone else."

Emma didn't catch his meaning, she didn't think Gareth was like that with her. "So?"

"So he likes you," Alex seemed annoyed at having to say it; jealous.

Unable to come back with something to say, she stuffed her hands in her pockets and looked down. Gareth doesn't care about me like that, that's bullcrap. Besides, he barely knows me. I barely know him.

The thought then occurred to her unwelcome; I sat with him for three days.

Emma tried to recall a single time that Gareth - besides through his illness - had shown any sign of interest in her. They'd known each other only a short while, but in a world where you could die any second of any day, it seemed like a lifetime.

There wasn't much there, regardless. Emma associated Mary with her closest companion in the group, though her and Gareth did do things together occasionally, she supposed. It was often them that got stuck clearing spaces or doing any heavy lifting. They worked well together, so it'd been in everyone's interest.

Their touches weren't prolonged or heart felt, there certainly wasn't any spark when she held onto his shoulder or arm. Their conversations weren't extremely grand either. In fact, they mostly spoke about survival, or the occasional joke.

He joked around with her more than anyone.

Was there something there? She knew that Gareth was more serious with his family, but that's the price of being a leader, being their leader. He wasn't her leader, she didn't need him in the ways they did.

Or did she need him? Didn't she need them all? Wasn't her idea of personal detachments fading? This was a group now and she was one of them. Groups needed each other.

Her thoughts fell short on the matter, so she pushed them away.

The short walk back was made in silence after Alex's comment, but when they got back to the door he finally spoke. "Don't tell Gareth I said anything, okay?"

There was nothing to tell as far as she was concerned. "Yeah, sure."

Before either could open the door, the knob jiggled and it broke free. Gareth stood on the other side, one hand clutching his ribs. "Five minutes."

"My hero," Emma replied, pushing her way into the door. She was careful not to knock Gareth, or make any contact that might upset his sick body. "Where's Mary?"

"Upstairs."

Alex moved in after her, and for a moment she wondered if he was waiting for something from her. As soon as it occurred to her, he was moving away and down the hall.

"Alex," she called, hoping this wasn't going to be another walk off.

"I'm just seeing Mary. Don't worry."

"Right," she muttered, running a hand through her hair. It was out today, since her elastic snapped last night and she couldn't find anything else to hold it up with.

Turning back around, she noticed that Gareth was still standing with the door open. She raised an eyebrow quizzically at him and he shut it.

"Is he alright?" Gareth asked, though he seemed oddly unfazed.

"Yeah, he's alright," she replied. "Are you?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

Emma walked over to one of the lounges and plopped onto it, crossing her arms over her chest. "Just being polite."

"When did you start doing that?" he joked.

Joked.

She felt suddenly defensive. Vulnerable. "Yeah well, can't be total assholes all the time, right?"

Gareth sat down and stared at her. In that moment she couldn't read him. "What did Alex say?"

"Nothing."

"Don't lie," he replied. He seemed curious, but also a little irritated.

Emma shuffled in her seat. "Nothing important, alright? Just drop it, yeah?"

Gareth shook his head. "So me, then-"

"Look, Alex just said he thinks -" she paused, searching out the correct words. "that you're a bit off with him."

He was quiet for a moment, the silence deafening. Emma wished that Alex would return and end it, or Mary. No one did, so she decided to say something. "Brothers fight, no big deal."

Gareth rolled his eyes. "Alex-"

Before he could finish the sentence, Alex and Mary stalked back into the room. Mary was sympathetic looking and Alex's face was slightly more red than before.

"We should eat," Mary said, feeling the tension in the room and trying to defuse it.

Emma didn't say anything but nodded, standing up and walking towards their bag of supplies. She pulled a few packets of chocolate - chocolate was one of the only foods they had left - and tossed one to Gareth and Alex, then passed the other beside her to Mary.

Everyone ate in silence, so Emma opted to excuse herself from the awkward glances and go for a walk around the perimeter to eat. No one said anything, or seemed to mind so she let herself out.

The air was cold and there was a strong wind, but she didn't notice it much. Her thoughts couldn't help but stray back to the conversation with Alex, everything else blocked out.

Just a special thank you section to all reviewers:

Leyshla Gisel: It truly does, our only hope now of seeing him before is fanfiction. Thanks for another review, you spoil me so!