Nori: YAY! Here we go with chapter four I think it is…
Tama: You aren't even sure what chapter you're on?
Nori: Nope! (smiles)
Tama: (shakes head) Who should do the disclaimer today?
Nori: I don't know…you choose!
Tama: I choose you….PIKACHU!
Pikachu: Pika?
Nori: But all he says is Pika…Pi…or Pikachu…
Tama: (smiles) I know this.
Nori: Fine, I'll do it. Ok, I do not own YYH, Naruto or any of the characters,,,besides me…and well Tama owns herself. I also don't own the whole Saw concept of this chapter! SO READ IT BITCHESSSS!
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-In A Dark Room-
Kakashi: (opens his eyes and sees darkness, jumps up) OH MY GOD! I'VE GONE BLIND!
Voice in room: No, no you haven't.
Kakashi: W-who's there?
VIR: It's meeeee.
Kakashi: Conscience? Is that you?
VIR: No, you mask wearing homo, it's me!
Kakashi: Who the hell is in here!?!?!?!
VIR: (flips on light switch) Me! Karasu! Don't you remember? Gym class in high school? The locker room?
Kakashi: O.O I thought I got rid of you in therapy!
Karasu: (chooses to ignore statement) So, how do you propose we escape from here?
Kakashi: (confused look, then looks down at ankle where he sees its chained to the wall. Looks around room to see that it looks like a very white, dirty bathroom, notices Karasu is chained to wall across the room, in middle of the room a dead body lays face down in a pool of blood) No! This is just like the locker room incident! What the eff!
Karasu: (smirks) Oh, I think the locker room was waaaay more fun than this!
Kakashi: (looks around frantically for a way to get out) How do we get out? What do we do? (pulls chain on ankle, doesn't come off) No! We're stuck!
Karasu: And you've just realized this?
Kakashi: (sees that dead body in the middle of the room is holding a tape recorder) Maybe we need to get that. (points to recorder)
Karasu: You're closer, so get it.
Kakashi: Eww, no, you get it!
Karasu: No, I'm not getting near that shit, you get it!
Kakashi: But, it's grosssss!
Karasu: You've been around blood before! Plus, I don't want to ruin my hair, I just shampooed it a few hours ago!
Kakashi: (sighs) Fine, fine. (looks around and spots a very conveniently placed child's toy that is a small plastic pole with a crocodile at the end, where when you squeeze the lever the mouth opens and closes….reaches out toy and grabs tape recorder)
Karasu: Wow, that was easy.
Kakashi: (looks at tape recorder) Too easy…
Karasu: Press play! Press play!
Kakashi: (presses play)
Voice on Recorder: (a horrible imitation of a male's suspenseful voice) Hello, Karasu. I would like to play a game.
Karasu: YAY GAMES! Can we blow things up in these games?
VOR: And no, we cannot blow anything up.
Karasu: (looks down in defeat) Aww…
VOR: As you can see, you are chained to a wall. The answer to your problem lies in your pants.
Kakashi: (looks up from tape recorder with a strange and terrified look on face…well the part you can see)
Karasu: (smiles big)
VOR: Live or die. The choice is (coughs) yours. (click)
Karasu: So, I have to get this off my foot…with my happy stick?
Kakashi: (still holding tape recorder) I gue-…
New VOR: (regular female voice) Nori! Nori! You forgot about the saws! Tell them about the saws!
VOR: (which is also now a regular female voice) Damn! Death to all things cute and cuddly! (recorder clicks again, back to horrible male impression) Oh, yes, one more thing! There are two saws hidden somewhere in the room. Find them to free yourselves! Let the game begin! (click, back to female voice) Ha, finally got that over with! How many times did it take me?
Other Voice: Like ten times…at least.
VOR: Yea, but at least we got it now!
OV: True, true. Ugh, I have a strange craving for chocolate.
VOR: CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!! Why do you want some?
OV: I'm on my period.
VOR: Aw, that sucks. I'm sorry.
Kakashi and Karasu: (just look at each other)
OV: It's ok, it should be done soon. Then I can go back to doing Kurama!
VOR: YAY! Go you guys!
Karasu: Nooo! I've always wanted Kurama as my own!!!!
Kakashi: (look of fear)
OV: Nori! You forgot to turn off the recorder!
VOR: Oh shit! Not again! (recorder clicks off)
Karasu: (frantic) No, no, no! (starts to cry) This isn't happening! First I lose Kurama! Now I'm going to die!
Kakashi: Don't worry…we aren't in any real danger.
Karasu: How do you know! Did you hear what they said? Live or DIE! DIE was in that sentence meaning we are going to DIE!
Kakashi: Knowing those two they probably planned something really stupid.
Karasu: Wait? You know them? Weird, they sounded so evil and sinister!
Kakashi: Yea…they're anything but that.
Karasu: So…about the answer to all our problems being in my pants…uh when we get out of here…wanna…
Kakashi: NO! NO! NEVER! I'M NOT GAY! I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! I LOVE HER VERY MUCH!
Karasu: Oh yea. I remember now. You guys reaaaallly do love each other. (winks)
Kakashi: What's that supposed to mean?
Karasu: Ohhh nothingggg…just that I've (talks really fast) seenyouguyshavingsexallthetime!
Kakashi: (jaw drops) How do you know where I live?
Karasu: (sighs) I guess I should tell you. Ever since we've graduated high school I've stalked you.
Kakashi: I'm…so…disturbed…right…now…
Karasu: So, about getting out of here. (unzips pants)
Kakashi: NO! NOT AGAIN! (covers eyes…well eye)
Karasu: (pulls a long saw out of pants) Wow, how did that get in there?
Kakashi: (slowly uncovers eye, sees saw) A saw! We can use that to cut through the chains!
Karasu: Oh, I thought we'd us it for-
Kakashi: Please…just don't finish that sentence.
Karasu: I was just gonna say-
Kakashi: No, just don't. Saw through your chain, I'll saw through mine, then we will get the hell out of here, in that time I will be getting a new address, and I will never have to see you…again!
Karasu: First I lost Kurama, then Koenma…now you…I've lost them all! (cries)
Kakashi: Koenma? Who the hell is Koenma?
Karasu: (immediately stops crying) The really sexy Prince of the Spirit World.
Kakashi: What? Do you like the letter 'K' or something?
Karasu: (looks down) Um, I, uh, have a bit of a fetish with the letter 'K'…
Kakashi: (to the side) I should warn Kisame…he's not safe…(looks up) Wait? Why should I care? He's the Akatsuki.
Karasu: What?
Kakashi: Nothing, just saw through the chain.
Karasu: Can I just blow it up?
Kakashi: No, that would kill both of us! Use. Saw. NOW!
Karasu: Ok, ok, jeez, don't get your panties in a bunch! (begins to saw through chains, saw breaks in half) Uh…oops…
Kakashi: (wide eyes…eye) O.O NO! NO NO NO! Please tell me that did not just break!
Karasu: That did not just break.
Kakashi: YES IT DID! IT BROKE! DAMN IT! (buries head in hands) No, this isn't happening. No…I need to get out of here! I'm going to go insane!
Karasu: I still could just blow it up, you know…
Kakashi: NO! DON'T BLOW SHIT UP!
Karasu: Jeesh, it was just a suggestion. So, what do we do?
Kakashi: (takes deep breath) Ok, Kakashi, just calm down. Think reasonably and you will get yourself out of this mess. Don't worry, its just Nori and Tama messing with you, nothing bad will happen.
Karasu: (weird look) Uh, dude, you're talking to yourself…
Kakashi: IT'S CALLED THINKING OUT LOUD! Ok…wait, maybe there is another tape around here to tell us another clue!
Karasu: Where though?
Kakashi: (thinks and sees the toilet next to him) Maybe it's in there…
Karasu: (scrunches face) Why would it be in there?
Kakashi: We're talking about Nori and Tama here…they think in strange ways…
Karasu: Maybe there's one in your pants too!
Kakashi: I'm not unzipping my pants near you, plus it probably is in the toilet. (crawls over to toilet and opens lid, gags at horrible smell then sticks hand in the disgusting water, searching for another tape)
Karasu: (tries and sees if he has anything) Did you find it?
Kakashi: (pulls out hand and looks at it in disgust) No. Nothing…
Karasu: Just check your pants!
Kakashi: It won't be there! It's too obvious and they aren't smart enough to think of that!
Karasu: (shrugs and lays on back, relaxing) Whaaatever. You keep looking. Just tell me if you need anything blown up.
Kakashi: (continues to search around where he can reach for another tape)
One Hour LaterKakashi: GAH! I still can't find that friggin' tape!
Karasu: (is asleep)
Kakashi: (sees that Karasu is asleep, looks down at pants) Well, I guess it wouldn't hurt to check…(unzips pants, tape falls out, face fault) They are IDIOTS!
Karasu: (suddenly wakes up) No, daddy, you shouldn't touch me like that!
Kakashi: (just stares at Karasu)
Karasu: (remembers where he is) Uh…I plead the fifth.
Kakashi: I'm just going to ignore that. (holds up tape) Let's listen to it. (puts it in tape recorder)
VOR: (still a very horrible impression of a man's voice) Kakashi Hatake. A skilled jonin at the village of Kono-Konohag-Konohagagur…Konohagakure! Killing to save the lives of others. But, you have one large secret that you keep from the world.
Kakashi: I don't have any secrets…(shifty eyes)
VOR: The secret that you hold from everyone around you is that your sheets have been soaking for the first twenty-five years of your life. I mean, who wouldn't want to kill someone who does that?
Kakashi and Karasu: What the hell?
VOR: To live you must betray the one closest to you. If you don't, you will die…let the game begin. (click)
Kakashi: I have to betray the one closest to me? I don't get it.
Karasu: Don't ask me. (lays back down and snickers) You still wet the bed?
Kakashi: (groans) No! I don't know where they got that from! So…to get out I need to betray the one closest to me? The one closest to me is Kurenai…I would never betray her!
Karasu: Great, we're stuck in here then!
Kakashi: (ignores Karasu) How could I even betray Kurenai while I'm in here? She probably doesn't even know where I am!
Karasu: I just think we should blow the living shit out of this place…that would solve everything!
Kakashi: SHUT UP! (sighs) We aren't blowing anything up. Ok, I think we need another tape for another hint.
Karasu: Why do you always think the answers to our problems are always on a tape? That's not how life is you know!
Kakashi: It's worked out for us so far.
Karasu: No it hasn't…
Kakashi: Yea, it has…
Karasu: We're still stuck here, so it really hasn't! (grins triumphantly)
Kakashi: Touché…
Karasu: Thank you. (looks over at a mirror that is dusty, in the dust is written "Don't Look In The Bathtub") Hey, Kakashi, maybe we should look in the bathtub.
Kakashi: Why would we do-
Karasu: (points to mirror)
Kakashi: (face faults) Oh… (crawls over the bathtub near him, peeks over and sees a pirate staring at him)
Pirate: Arg matey! Fer that ye walk the plank!
Kakashi: (looks at Karasu) A pirate…?
Karasu: A PIRATE! I know how to speak pirate!
Kakashi: No, you don't…
Karasu: Yea, yea! I really do!
Kakashi: (ignores Karasu…again) Uh, pirate…do you know how to get out of here?
Pirate: (confused look)
Karasu: Scurvy, tuberculosis, booty!
Pirate: (pops up and smiles) Mutiny!
Karasu: Doubloons, treasure, Davey Jones?
Pirate: Parlé, ship, Jack Sparrow!
Karasu: Ah, ah, Captain Jack Sparrow.
Pirate: Ayy, cannon balls!
Kakashi: What is going on?
Karasu: (in a surprisingly chipper tone) The pirate told me that we need to saw through our legs, not the chains, to get out of here!
Kakashi: What!? Why? Plus we don't have another saw…yours broke…
Pirate: (smiles and holds up saw)
Kakashi: (hits himself in head) I just HAD to say that…
Karasu: Oh yea, one more thing, about the whole you having to betray the one closest to you, they didn't mean the one you cared about the most, they literally meant the one closest to you!
Kakashi: (is suddenly happy) So, you?
Karasu: (shakes head and points at the pirate)
Kakashi: (frowns) How do you kill a pirate?
Karasu: That's easy! All you have to do is cut off their wooden leg! Without that they're powerless!
Kakashi: Um…ok..(begins to saw off pirate's wooden leg)
Pirate: (just lays there) AH NO!!! SHIVER ME TIMBERS! (leg snaps off…dies)
Kakashi: (holds wooden leg) Wow, that was easy. Now what?
Karasu: I don't know, its not like I speak pirate or anything!
Kakashi: (face fault) There's nothing in the pirate leg…
Karasu: (shrugs) Why don't we just blow something up…
Kakashi: No!
Karasu: (holds up a ticking bomb) Aww, but I got this ready…
Kakashi: AH! YOU'RE GOING TO KILL US!
Bomb: (giggles and goes boom)
The room explodes and Kakashi and Karasu are both left with ash around and on them…but are still chained up.
Karasu: YAY! EXPLOSIONS!
Kakashi: THAT DIDN'T HELP ANYTHING WE'RE STILL CHAINED!
Karasu: Aw…
Then, Nori and Tama come riding up on a tyrannosaurus rex.
Tama: Hey guys!
Nori: HIYA! (sees pirate) OH NO! THE PIRATE HE'S BACK! (hides under dinosaur)
Kakashi: I'M GOING TO KILL YOU BOTH!
Karasu: Hi dudettes!
Tama: Why what happened?
Kakashi: You guys got us put into this thing! Now, GET US OUT!
Nori: (from under dinosaur) No we didn't. Why would we put you guys here?
Kakashi: You could easily tell who was talking on the tapes!
Tama: Uh, what are you on, dude?
Nori: Yea…uh…can you please get rid of that pirate…
Kakashi: First get us out of here.
Nori: I don't know how! Did you try a password?
Karasu: A password?
Nori: Yea, like huevos rancheros, or something!
Chains: (open and free Kakashi and Karasu)
Kakashi: (faints)
Karasu: YAY! This is just like the locker room!
Tama: What?
Karasu: Nothing.
Nori: Well, we should get him and leave.
Karasu: (picks up Kakashi and gets on t-rex along with Nori and Tama)
Then the four all ride off into the sunset back to Konoha.
END.
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Nori: YAY DONE!
Tama: Holy shit…and since when do YYH people live in Konoha?
Nori: Oh, they don't.
Tama: Will you please go to therapy like everyone has suggested before?
Nori: I WILL NOT BE SILENCED! Read and review please!
Tama: No flames….