This fic is different from the rest of mine. Definitely darkerand full of angst. Usually I love to write the dark and angst fics but I always throw in the fluff and smut as well. Lol. This fic, I'm not sure if it will ever get fluffy. I feel like Season 6 was very dark and Jax and Tara both had alot of darkness in them. I know they loved eachother deeply but they both had so many issues between them and their relationship. Especially with themselves. There was so many things that were clouded over or brought up but never explored and I feel like I need to hash all that out.

I really hope you all are enjoying this fic. Again I feel like it could be polished more, but for what I'm trying to go for, I think it's perfect the way it is. I hope you all feel the same way as I do.

This one is a little longer then the last few lol, but probably not as long as you'll all hope for. I'm sorry. At least I am writing, right?

Jesus Christ, Tara!" Jax yelled wincing at the pain shooting through his arm. "After everything we have been through, the way I feel about you... you think I'd kill you? Is that really what you think of me. Pulling his right hand towards his body, his eyes stared at his hurt, bloodied hand, before looking towards Tara. Her head was turned but Jax noticed the blood trickling down her mouth...the bruise that was starting to form around her cheek bone and he swallowed, "I – I didn't mean to do that. Oh my god Tara. I didn't mean to hit you." He scrambled to unlock the cuffs and his hand reached for her face and his fingers brushed lightly against her left cheek.

She pushed his hand away and shoved him hard. Her head turning towards Jax. Her green eyes darkened. "You didn't mean to shoot a needle of crank in Wendy's arm either, did you?" She snarled, moving closer to him and suckered punching him hard - sending him flying backwards.

Jax paused, a shock look crossing his features. "What? Ho – How did you know that?"

Tara's hand touched her bleeding lip, her face didn't hurt as much as Jax thought it did. He really hadn't meant to hit her, he had grazed her face when his fist collided with the tree."I know what you did Jax. She came to me the day after, told me everything. I also know about what you did to Ima. You a woman beater now too?" Tara spat at at Jax, he winced at her hurtful words and her green eyes softened. "What happened to you? What have you become?"

Jax swallowed, he pulled away, stepping backwards onto the blanket and sat down. His head lowered and he brought his good hand up to his head and ran his fingers into his long, greasy hair.

" I – I was trying to protect my family...I was trying to protect you. "

Tara laughed, " Protect me? You were trying to protect me from a girl? You weren't protecting me, you were protecting your club. The one thing I always loved about you was that no matter what, I knew you would never hurt a helpless woman. I guess I was wrong. " She sighed heavily and moved towards him. "I am not a fan of either of those woman Jax, I am the first to admit that they deserve whatever they have coming to them. But, I never in my wildest dreams thought that you were that big of a monster. So, I'm sorry if I am wary of you and what you might do to me. Hell, part of me thinks that this shit you pulled tonight, was you trying to connect with me, the other part of me thinks that you drug me out here in the middle of the forest to kill me and let the club despense of me. After everything you've done lately, the shit I've seen you do. I wouldn't be surprised in the least. Wouldn't put it past you."

"Since we are being so honest with eachother. I'll let you know exactly why I never let you come see me while I was sitting in jail - for your club. Gemma found our right before I was arrested that we had talked and that I was going to take the boys to providence. She seen some flowers from them in my office. She threatened me, telling me if I left, she would make sure I never got to leave, that I would be taken to jail for Pamela Torric's death and guess what happened that night? I get arrested for being accessory."

"Babe - my mom can be a bitch, but she would never turn you in..She...

"Shut up Jax, shut the fuck up. "She screamed. "Since day one you have been sticking up for your mother. Everything awful thing she has said or done - you have protected her. She got what she wanted when I left for Chicago and when I came back she did whatever she could to tear us apart. Getting Wendy out of rehab, giving her the key to your house...when you chose me at Donna's funeral. I thought maybe we could try and get along. We became close I thought she loved me but i realized early on that she only stood by me because I helped her when she was raped, kept her secret from you, from Clay. Gemma only ever really used me when It was convenient for her or for the club. She was so pissed off that you were allowing me to take the boys out of town that she had somehow set it up so I was be beaten in jail. BUT, I kicked that black bitches ass that came at me that day - almost killed her - and, after that, no one tried anything with me. Why would your mother do that you ask? " Tara paused, pulling her bandaged arm up and pointing it towards Jax. "To keep her precious boy and grandkids by her side...but, that didn't scare me or waiver my decision."

Tara laughed, brushing her short, brown hair with her bandaged hand, " The day Wendy overdosed in the hospital right after Abel was born. Who do you think smuggled in that needle that day? Who would go to any length to keep her family together. Is this getting through your head Jax... should I continue? Should I tell you what else your mother has done behind your back? Because believe me, that is just the tip of the iceberg."

"Tara, I'm sorry for what my mother has done to you , but with all the shit with Clay, I'm not surprised. Look what he turned her into."

Tara laughed harshly, " You are seriously still saying Gemma is the victim. That Clay was the one to turn her into what she is? I always thought you were smarter than that Jax. Maybe I have to be a little more clear than for you. Clay was nothing compared to your mother. When you came back from Ireland and I found those letters. John talked alot about your mother an her secret relationship with Clay - he also talked about how he believed Gemma wants him dead, how Gemma was planning to sabatoge his bike," She glanced at Jax who was staring at her intensely, " Your mother wanted him dead Jax. Clay was just the one to do it for her because he loved her. Kind of sounds like you and I and Kohn, right? When Gemma found out I had the letters, she went into my office and took out the ones implicating her and destroyed them. She didn't ask Clay to try and kill me, that was all on his own, but when she found out about it, she never did anything about it, because he knew that if he said anything that you would find out exactly why. She knew without proof, you would never believe it. I really don't care if you believe that she was involved in your father's death or not. Because it really doesn't matter anymore, you killed the only man that would ever prove it. Which even if you did ask, Clay loved her too much, he would never rat on her.

Jax raised his head and Tara seen the tears falling down his face. She smiled, her lips curving into almost a evil grin, even though part of her felt bad for making him hurt, she hated seeing him so upset, especially him crying, but tonight - seeing him cry, comforted her. It let her know that he still had feelings deep down. That, he hadn't turned full monster on her. She knew she was breaking him. Maybe this is what she needed to do to bring her Jax back - the Jax she fell in love with.

"Two days ago she came to our house. OUR house and threatened me. Telling me either 'Mommy moves away or passes away.' She implied you or the club would kill me and if that didn't happen then she would be the one to do it. So my only option is to protect my boys from her and from you and if that means me running - I will. But, if you want to save our marriage, save our boys. You will deal with your murderous mother. The decision is yours Jax... what's it gonna be?" She whispered, she turned away from him, leaning down and picking up the fallen flashlight. Without looking back she headed back, the small flashlight leading her through the large opening.

TBC. What do you think?