AHHHH! Ok ok ok so I just realized I have been forgetting something. The disclaimer! I totally forgot to put that so….
Disclaimer: I do not own Sebastian, Ciel, or any of the Black Butler crew :P but you know, Yami and Ember are sort of mine. By 'sort of' I mean I own the shit out of these characters.
Also the way fanfiction has been uploading my story is weird. I don't like the lay out and how it doesn't keep my indentions in the paragraphs. RAGE! Lol anywhore, lets all hope my story doesn't get taken down because of the lack of disclaimers. As always thank you all for reading my story. And here is yet another chapter of 'How did we get here?'
Enjoy!
As Ember stormed out of the room the tears pooled over and ran down her face. She went to turn down the hall towards her room and ran smack into a shocked looking Ciel. She looked up at him, surprised. How long had he been there? How much had he heard? Fear that she had ruined any type of friendship brought upon even more tears as she looked up at his face.
Ciel grabbed her wrist and started dragging her down the hall. She followed behind tripping and wide eyed, confused as to what was happening. Had he heard? Was he now so angry and repulsed that he was going to make her leave? He slung a door open and pulled her in. She saw that they were in his room. But the tears continued to fall. She felt betrayed, hurt, angry, confused, and heartbroken. Her eyes went to the floor in embarrassment. She just wanted to go home. Then she felt arms around her. Her face was flush against Ciels chest. His arms wrapped protectively around her. She stood in shock for moment before she lifted her arms and hugged him back letting out a sob. They stood there for a few minutes as she cried into his shirt.
Ciel hugged the breaking girl in his arms. He wasn't sure why he felt the need to comfort her, but every time he saw her cry his stomach felt like it had rocks in it. He was annoyed at himself for feeling this way about her. She was merely some strange girl who had shown up on his doorstep one day. Well not technically his doorstep, actually his shower. He fussed about it in his head as he listened to the muffled cries in his shirt. He noticed them coming less often and her body seemed to relax slightly.
Once she calmed down Ciel pulled back but kept his hands on her arms. Ember looked down, not wanting to let him see her red puffy face. But he removed one hand and tilted her chin up, so he could look into her eyes. He looked into dark brown eyes, almost black in the dimly lit room. He saw the hurt and confusion in them, but so many other emotions as well. He took his hand and laid it on the side of her face, wiping away her tears with his thumb. Ciels face looked troubled. His eyebrows furrowed together and a frown set on his lips. He hated seeing her cry. And when he heard that she had feelings for him his heart flipped in his chest. He knew he couldn't be with her, so why was he letting himself do this. Letting these feelings take over his movements. Maybe if she would stop looking so sad he could compose himself.
"Don't cry, it's not very becoming of you." He told her. She sniffed and nodded slightly. "I don't think she meant it." he told her. "She was probably just caught up in emotions." He said awkwardly trying to comfort her. She slowly let a small smile grace her lips as she looked up at him. Once again Ciels heart stuttered in his chest. The sides of his mouth turning up in a smile.
"So you fancy someone who is already taken?" he questioned. Although he knew she was referring to himself, he wanted to hear her say it. Embers face turned 3 shades of red before she looked away again. Ciel chuckled and led them to sit on the bed.
"I'm sorry." Ember mumbled to her hands in her lap. He looked at her confused.
"Why are you apologizing?" confusion clear in his voice.
"Because you have Elizabeth, and you probably think I'm silly for thinking I have a chance with you." She sighed. She started biting at her lip, a terrible nervous habit of hers.
Ciel sat for a minute trying to decide what would be the right thing to say. He didn't want her to be any more upset, but everything she had said was true. He was betrothed to Elizabeth. He cared for Lizzy yes, but when he thought about doing romantic things with her, it was not the way most men would. He thought of it like a chore, something that needed to be done. He was not a normal man who just falls for a girl. He had to much on the line, he was to different. He did not want to emotionally attach himself to anyone. With the life he lead, and the company he kept, he could loose them at any moment. Plus he would end up out living them considering he, being a demon, could not die. But if he was being honest with himself, he knew what falling for someone would be like. He had seen multiple couples falling in love. He had read enough books in his spare time to understand what the tell tale signs of it would be.
And every feeling and reaction towards Ember, was screaming that he was falling for her. He looked over to her and saw her bottom lip trapped between her teeth. Gnawing at it nervously. He reached a hand over slowly turned her face towards his. Her teeth clamped down on her lip as she stared wide-eyed over at him. He took his thumb and slowly slid it over her lip. She released it from her teeth's grasp and left her lips slightly apart. He swiped his thumb back across her thumb where small teeth indentions were left on the pink skin. He stared at her lip entranced. He hadn't even known he was leaning in until he heard an intake of breath come from those lips. His eye shot up and looked at her shocked ones. He started leaning away but Ember put one hand behind his head and pulled him in, crashing her lips to his.
Ciel froze in shock momentarily and then got angry. He started to push her away when she wrapped her other arm around him and kissed him more roughly. He smirked into the kiss at her boldness. No one had ever had the audacity to just kiss him like that. He kissed her backand put his hands on her waist. She ran her hand through his hair. It was like silk between her fingers as she held onto it. He grabbed her plump lower lip with his own teeth and tugged at it slightly. Then licked over it soothingly with his tongue. She opened her mouth a bit and let her own tongue come out to meet his and he jerked back. She sat shocked staring at a startled looking Ciel. What was he doing? Kissing this girl, knowing she liked him.
"Sorry." Ember said half heartedly.
"No you're not." Ciel said. He knew she liked him, and he could tell that in that kiss, there was no regret. Even if she couldn't be with him, she wasn't going to let her possibly one chance to kiss him slip by. "I can not be in a real relationship Ember." He told her. He really did not want to hurt her. He wanted her to understand that she was not the problem, he was. He was the one that couldn't be in a true relationship. "Me and Elizabeth's marriage is merely for show as far as I am concerned. Her business and mine joining together to work." He explained.
"How could you do that?" she asked. Ciel looked over to see sadness in her eyes. Not for herself though, but for him. "How could you marry someone you don't love?"
"Like I said, business."
"That's not what marriage should be. Your business could work together without you two being forced to marry. But, I don't think Elizabeth thinks of your marriage that way though." She thought back to the way Elizabeth looked at Ciel and how possessive she was of him.
"I know how she feels. She has told me. You are correct; she is in love with me. But the feeling is not especially mutual. I care for her but not in that way." He said.
"Then why marry her!?" Ember screamed exasperated throwing her hands in the air.
"That is none of your business." He said sternly.
"Oh hell, you just freaking kissed me. I feel like you can tell me why you want to marry a girl you don't even love."
Ciel glared at her. "Because it is what my parents wanted. Since they are gone this is their last wish, and I plan on fulfilling it." he said loudly and in an annoyed tone. Who was this girl to ask so many questions about his personal life?
Ember frowned. "Did your parents love each other?" she asked suddenly. The random seeming question threw him off guard.
"What?" he asked.
"Did your parents truly love each other?" she repeated her question.
"Yes." He answered still slightly confused. Ember got up from the bed and walked over to him. She placed a hand lightly on his arm and looked up at him.
"Then would they not want the same for you?" she asked. Her simple question startled him. He knew his parents had loved him, and he knew they had always wanted him to be happy. But that was their last request of him. They had wanted him to marry Elizabeth. He shook off her hand and turned to the door.
"You do not know what they would have wanted." He said vehemently.
"Maybe not, but I know what you deserve." She said walk up behind him. "To be happy." She said. He turned around and saw her smiling softly. His heart once again tripped over itself and then started beating faster to make up for it. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair.
"You make things so complicated, do you know that?" he said in an aggravated tone.
She just chuckled and smiled brighter. "So I have been told."
His gaze softened as he looked at her. Why must she do this to him? He thought back to what he had over heard her say during her argument and he frowned.
"What's the matter?" she asked noticing his change in mood.
"Do you really want to leave?" the thought of her leaving automatically made him get a longing in his chest. In the short amount of time that she had been there, he had grown accustomed to her company.
Ember shrugged slightly "Sort of. But Yami's right. I don't know how, so I guess it doesn't really matter. At the same time, I could wake up tomorrow back in my time. I really don't know." That fact made Ciels heart drop. That was true; she could disappear as quickly as she had magically appeared. What would he do then? He guessed then that he would have to suppress those feelings. He wouldn't be able to anything about them then anyways. He didn't like not having a choice. She couldn't just leave like that. The though of her not being there made his stomach twist.
"You can not leave yet." He ordered.
"I don't get a say so in that." She said weakly against his stare. Then, in a rash moment of fear he grabbed her face with both of his hands and looked her dead in the eyes. He leaned forward and quickly pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was very possessive and demanding, but Ember didn't care. She kissed back, trying to keep the dizziness at bay.
He pulled back startled at himself. What just happened? Did I really just kiss her again? He asked himself. He knew he didn't want to lose her but he didn't plan kissing her again. Especially not with him initiating it. What the bloody hell are you doing Ciel? He asked himself.
Ciel pulled his hands away and firmly clasped them behind his back. "I have to go, I am probably already late for a meeting." He said with a voice of disgust, aggravated with his own apparent lack of control. "I will see you at supper." He opened the door to leave but stopped in the doorway and turned back to her. "You and Yami will work it out." And with that he left.
Yami continued to sit in the chair for a while wishing she could cry. She felt so bad and wasn't quite sure what to do to fix it. She got up and walked out, not sure where she was going. As she walked she decided to go find Sebastian, maybe if he had time he could listen to what happened and help.
She made her way through several rooms and found him finally in the library perched atop a ladder. She ventured in slowly watching him. She remained quiet and watched him for a minute smiling. He made everything he did look elegant. Whether it was his graceful movement as he swept the duster over the tops of the shelves, or his sleek black tailored coat.
Sebastian felt a presence in the room and he looked down at her, his ruby eyes meeting hers. Sebastian knew how he felt towards her. But he was still kind of confused; he had never felt this way towards a mere human before. It wasn't like he tried not to or anything, there just had never been a human interesting enough to capture his attention like she did. No person was as beautiful to him as she was.
He had been attracted to human before yes, in either a lustful or hungry way. Whether it was their body he wanted, or their soul he wished to devour. But how he felt towards her was different from those. Something about this girl captured him. He never wanted to walk away from her. He didn't even want to look away from her. The thought of leaving her alone made him feel lonely. He wondered how she felt when she was alone? Did she feel lonely? Did she miss him whenever he was not there? He was not quite sure when this happened, but now whenever he was away from her, he missed her. He longed for her company. And now here she was. He smiled another one of his rare, not so rare anymore, true smiles. The smile he saved just for her.
He hopped off the ladder gracefully and pulled off his gloves since they had become dirty from cleaning. He made his way over to her and immediately noticed something was wrong. Even though she was smiling, her eyes were troubled. He could feel that her soul was in pain. His eyebrows pulled together and stopped in front of her.
"What troubles you my lady?" he asked concerned. She dropped her smile and her face became grave again.
"I royally screwed up." She told him. He raised his eyebrows at this strange statement. She always said the strangest things. "Me and Ember got into a fight." She said and Sebastian raised an eyebrow. Yami gasped in a lung full of air "You see Ember said she wanted to go home and I told her it was impossible. So we argued about that, and then it escalated to me saying a rude comment about her and Ciel." Yami said in a rush. Sebastian looked at her quizzically.
"What about her and Ciel." He asked.
You sighed in aggravation "Well it's obvious she likes Ciel, I know you've noticed. And I basically told her she had no chance with him."
"Why would tell her that?" he asked.
"Well it's true, he's marrying Elizabeth." Yami said, frustrated that nobody seemed to get that. "But she got really upset… I'm not to good with reading peoples emotion sometimes. I realized I screwed up to late and now she's really mad at me." She looked down ashamed in her self for doing that to her best friend.
"Simply apologize. Only time will heal what has happened, that along with your apology should clear the air between you two." He placed a hand on her shoulder and bent down to look into her eyes. "You two are very close, I know. I doubt she will hold a grudge for to long." He smiled comfortingly at her.
"Yeah." She agreed solemnly. Sebastian reached into his coat pocket pulling out his pocket watch. He would be running a bit behind schedule…. But
"How about I fix you a snack my lady." He offered hoping to lift her spirits slightly. She smiled slightly and nodded. He started to leave but Yami didn't follow, lost in her own thoughts. He sighed and walked up to her, but she didn't even notice him. He reached down and grabbed her hand. As soon as their skin made contact, there was that electricity flowing between them. She turned quickly to him and wrapped her arms around his torso. Sebastian stood there for a moment stunned, then slowly wrapped his arms around her comfortingly. No words were said, and none were needed. Eventually she pulled away smiling, her eyes less troubled.
"Come my lady." He said tugging her gently along. She followed silently, her eyes on their hands. Her heart was going 90 to nothing in her chest.
Sebastian had always said 'my lady' to any women. For example with Madam Red and Lady Elizabeth. But whenever he said it to Yami, he always put a hidden emphasis to 'my'. He hadn't told her yet, but he wanted to claim her as his. His lady. And so, he did it secretively, behind his words.
They went to the kitchen where Bardroy was attempting to cook something with his blowtorch.
"Bardroy, what on earth are you doing!" Sebastian scolded. He yelled at him about correct cooking utensils and kicked him out of the kitchen sighing.
"You may have a seat if you would like." Sebastian said as he pulled out a stool for her. Yami sat down and watched Sebastian move gracefully around the kitchen. All while he was cooking he would glance up at her and smirk. After a few minutes he set a plate on the counter beside her.
"I have prepared a currant and berry summer pudding with keemun tea." He announced placing a teacup beside the plate and pouring a very light brown liquid into the cup. Although he said pudding, the snack looked more like a small pink cake. It had raspberries, blueberries and blackberries on top and around it, with a strawberry cut into fours placed decoratively atop it.
Yami took her fork and took an experimental bite. It was cool and delicious. It was like having a bite of all the different berries all held together by the mysterious crust. Her eyes lit up and she took another bite. It made her smile and as Sebastian had hoped, lifted her spirits a bit.
"Thank you Sebastian." Yami said sincerely grateful.
"My pleasure." He said bowing slightly. He lifted his head and became eye level with hers. His face was very close and Yami's breath hitched. Sebastian smirked and lifted his hand to her face. Yami held her breath and stared into his eyes in anticipation. He placed his thumb on the corner of her mouth and slid his thumb across pulling it back, a bit of red berry juice on it. He slowly licked it of his finger, never breaking eye contact with Yami. She sat there frozen, her stomach flipping and her heart rate going up. She started to lean forward unconsciously, drawn to him like a moth to the light. Her eyes flittered shut, but as soon as she went to close those last few centimeters Sebastian stood up.
Sebastian smirked at her with a teasing glint in his eye "Now, if you could pardon me mam, I must attend to my chores." He said bowing and walking away. Leaving a dazed Yami, looking at the door he had exited from.
Dinner that evening was tense. No one spoke for the whole first part. Yami looked down at her plate while Ember sent her brief glares from across the table. Sometimes Ember would look over to her left to Ciel at the head of the table, but when they made eye contact both looked down quickly. Sebastian came in with dessert and noticed the awkwardness.
"My lord, next Monday is the opening of Earnest Carters aquarium. The one the Funtom Company is endorsing." Sebastian reminded Ciel.
"Ah yes, right. I suppose this means I must attend." He said. He rested his cheek on his fist and glanced at Ember from a sideways glance.
"Yes my lord, your presence is required. Would you like me to telephone Lady Elizabeth and request for her to accompany you?" Sebastian offered.
"No, she will be accompanying her parents at some meeting on that day." He told him waving his hand. He looked over at Ember again then looked at his food. "Ember, would you mind accompany me?" he asked not looking at her. Her eyebrows rose and a smile spread across her face.
"It would be an honor." She said happily.
"What about Miss Yami?" Sebastian inquired looking over at her. He smiled at her then turned his attention to back to his master.
"I suppose she could attend as well if she pleases." He said looking at Yami. She nodded and smiled to Sebastian. Ember stood abruptly making a few dishes clatter on the table. She gave a death glare to Yami and walked away from the table. Everyone looked at her confused. Yami got up and ran after her calling her name. Ember got to her room and slammed the door in Yami's face.
"Ember! C'mon!" Yami pounded on the door and tried to open it, but it was locked. "Ember please let me in. Can I just talk to you?" Silence answered her.
"What are you mad about now? I know your upset about earlier but what about just now? What did I do?" Yami asked. The door flew open.
"Why do you have to go too!?" Ember yelled.
"What?"
"That was suppose to be time for me to get close to Ciel and now your going to intrude on it!"
"He invited me! What was I suppose to say?" she countered
"I don't know, that you don't like fish or something." Ember said angrily.
"What!?" Yami asked exasperated. Ember gritted her teeth then slammed the door again.
"What the hell Ember!" Yami yelled and tried to open the door to find it locked again. Ember stood with her back against the door fighting back tears. She was so angry she didn't even want to hear Yami's voice. She figured if she kept quiet, Yami would go away.
"Fine, I guess you can hear me out here." Yami breathed in a deep breath then let it out, calming herself. "I'm sorry. Look, I know I could have handled the situation differently and I really didn't mean what I said earlier. I mean it is sort of true, but I was kind of harsh about it." she still got no response. Her heart dropped, could she have really screwed up for good this time. "I don't want to loose my best friend." She heard her voice crack but swallowed the lump in her throat and continued. "Ember, I need you, especially now, in this world. I don't really have anyone that I can fully trust besides you. So, I am really sorry. Can you forgive me." she said her voice almost a whisper as she finished. The door slowly opened and Ember stood there in the doorway, still looking angry. Slowly her eyes softened and she let a small smile appear. Ember threw her arms around Yami in a hug.
"I suppose." Ember said. Yami hugged her back relieved. "Sorry, for getting so mad and stuff."
Yami chuckled "So we're good?" Yami asked pulling back.
"Yeah."
"Ok good. But you seriously have to stop all that complaining, and get your shit together." Yami joked laughing
Ember laughed and shook her head. "Yeah, yeah, I know." Yami laughed with her and then turned to walk away.
"Ciel challenged me to a game of chess earlier, wanna come watch?" Yami asked.
"Sure, but you're going to get you ass kicked. You know that right?" Ember smiled and followed after her.
They arrived back in the dining room, both with smiles on their faces and standing close to each other. Ciel furrowed his brow in confusion and Sebastian smiled.
"So are you two done fighting like children?" Ciel asked annoyed by how troublesome the two had been since their fight. They both glared at him, Ember the first to crack a smile.
"Yeah we're friends again." Ember said.
"Wait, we stopped being friends during this?" Yami asked looking over at her 'renewed' best friend.
"I don't know if you noticed or not, but I sort of hated you for a bit. I mean I guess we were friends, but I didn't feel like acknowledging it." Ember said.
"Wow, thanks. Nice to know." Yami scoffed. "Anyways. Ciel!" She shouted. He looked up from his tea to her. "Me. You. Chess." She said challenging him.
He smirked at her and rolled his eyes. "Oh please, you seriously want to attempt to beat me in a game of chess?" he laughed as if it was the most absurd thing he had ever heard.
"Yeah. What? You scared you might actually get beat?" she teased. He just scoffed at her.
"As if. Sebastian, ready the chess bored in my office." He ordered.
"Yes my lord." Sebastian smirked.
So yeah, Ember is a bit ballsy and Yami is a bit dense when it comes to others emotions. But hey! Who wouldn't take the chance to kiss Ciel if they had it? Anyways I wanted to do a special little shout out to those who commented on my story. I giant thanks to Toboe's Soulmate, Venipa, , JadeUnknown, broweiss27, Rose, and orangeporqupine! Your comments really mean so much to me and is what gives me the motivation to write! That and my bestfriend/editor, Yami, breathing down my neck to write my damn story… I procrastinate a lot, what can I say? So thank you all and please comment to tell me what you think