"I can't believe we just wasted four hours getting lost in the Temple. The day's almost over for Pete's sake!"

Obi-wan watched, half amused and half exhausted, as his padawan kept muttering to himself on his way to the kitchen. It had taken them a good two and a half hours to get out of that blasted room and another hour or so to find their way back. Not to mention they hadn't even gone to the gardens.

He followed Anakin into the kitchen and leaned against the counter as his friend dug through the fridge for something to eat. "First we had to force down French toast made out of durasteel, then he trashes my droid, then he leads me on a wild bantha chase through the Temple, then he doesn't have the access code to get out of that stupid room, and now he has nothing edible to eat. How did I get stuck with such an incompetent master? Wow, I just used a pretty big word… incompetent. Sounded right…" Anakin trailed off and straightened up, holding something in his hand.

He turned to Obi-wan, who was now wearing a rather irritated look, and held it up. "What is this?"

Obi-wan blinked, coolly staring at the youth for a few moments longer, and then waved his hand dismissively. "I strongly suggest you don't eat that, Anakin, but knowing you, I honestly don't see any point in giving you a warning. Feel free to dig in." He walked away and dropped into the couch with a heavy sigh.

Anakin followed, still examining the wrapped up piece of… something… that closely resembled a moldy brownie. He sniffed it. "It smells chocolaty."

His master's eyes were shut, but he answered anyway. "That's because it is, Anakin. Remember that batch of brownies you attempted to make a few weeks ago?"

"That's what this is?" Anakin tossed it into the trash. "Yuck! Why did you even keep that?"

"Anakin, could you do me a favor?"

"What?"

"I know this is asking a lot of you, but could you shut up and let me rest?"

Anakin frowned and stalked off towards his room. He was stopped by a high-pitched beeping, no, screeching noise. He turned around and winced. "Is that your com, master?"

Obi-wan groaned and sat up, reaching for his belt. "I've been meaning to replace it…" he muttered. Pressing a button, he raised it to his mouth. "Kenobi."

"Obi-wan? Yoda, this is. Pressing matters to attend to, I have, and able to get to my next class, I am not. I was wondering if willing to teach, you would be."

"Of course, Master. Anakin and I are always willing to help out," Obi-wan said, struggling to hold in a groan. He hung up and turned to look at Anakin. "The class doesn't start for another two hours, so would you mind keeping it down while I take a short nap?"

Anakin was staring at him with a mixture of irritation and shock. "I can't believe you just agreed to do that."

Obi-wan sighed and shut his eyes, relaxing into the couch. "It's only an hour-long class, Anakin, and initiates are hardly intimidating."

"It's not that!" Anakin groaned and sat down on the floor. "The class is on diplomatic resolutions. Sure, you're good at that kind of stuff, but I can't stand anything that has to do with diplomacy."

"Anakin… just shut up and let me rest."

"But –"

"Anakin…"

Anakin huffed and lay down. "Fine." And then it was dead silent, the only sounds being his and Obi-wan's breathing. He stared at the ceiling with mild interest, noting that, yet again, something in their apartment was brown. Unbelievable.

That was it. After the class was over, he was going to get the largest can of blue paint he could find and do something about this incredibly boring…

"Master?"

"Hm?" Obi-wan mumbled, barely awake.

"There's a weird-looking bug on our ceiling."

"That's nice, Anakin," Obi-wan muttered. Maybe Anakin would take the hint and leave it at that.

But no. He was lucky, but he wasn't that lucky.

"No, seriously. This thing is pretty much the ugliest bug I have ever seen, and it looks like it could snap a finger off with those pincers…" Anakin trailed off at the sound of an exaggerated sigh from the couch. He frowned and glared at Obi-wan from his spot on the floor. "You could show some interest."

His master groaned and sat up. The glare he received in return almost made him regret those words. Almost. The other half of him was oddly pleased that he'd managed to get under Obi-wan's skin. "Anakin, honestly. Is this really so important that you keep me awake because of it? Because I hardly think that a bug deserves the amount of attention you are giving it."

Anakin gestured at the ceiling where the insect was now moving slowly towards the wall behind the couch. "Have you seen this bug?"

Obi-wan's gaze rose to the ceiling as he began to reply. "I don't really care what the thing looks like – oh Force!" He managed to roll off the couch right as the thing dropped onto it, landing and sticking without a sound. Obi-wan sat up and stared at it. "What is that?"

Anakin smirked. "See, I told you it was weird. And now it's attacking you. Maybe you insulted it."

Obi-wan gave him a disgusted look, but kept one eye on the bug that had started to make a low, buzzing sound. "Oh yes, I'm sure that's why it tried to drop on me. I insulted it. I don't suppose an apology would make it stop."

"You don't have to get all snappy," Anakin protested. He watched the insect take off and fly back to the ceiling where it landed and was still again. "See, everything's fine now."

"Hmm…" Obi-wan stood up and moved to seat himself in the armchair in the corner of the room, a safe distance from the rather large dot on the ceiling. "Feel free to take the couch if you want it."

He shut his eyes once more, hoping both Anakin and the bug would leave him alone.

That lasted all of a minute.

"Master, it's following me."

Unbelievable...

Then he wondered why he was so surprised that they had found themselves, once again, in yet another preposterous situation. Being attacked by a bug. A bug. Obi-wan barely held in another groan and cracked an eye open. "Are you expecting me to do something about that?"

Anakin was backing away from the bug in a circular path that took him around their small living room. Obi-wan might have smirked if not for the fact that he was already well-passed the point of being annoyed.

Keeping one eye on the rather large, and impossibly ugly insect, Anakin managed to give his former master a pained look. "Master, it has pincers... and they're HUGE!"

The bug made itself heard once more in its low, buzz-like dialect.

Obi-wan attempted to show some interest and sat up. "They do appear to be quite sharp as well," he commented before smirking. "I'm afraid you're on your own, Anakin. Whether or not this bug wants to eat you is no concern of mine."

The one piece of vegetation in their apartment wobbled a little as Anakin bumped into it. He jumped slightly. "Ouch! Why do we still have that blasted piece of -" The bug jumped forward a little in response and Anakin instantly froze. "Master, I'm cornered. It's going to - oh kriff!" A much louder buzz sounded as Anakin ignited his lightsaber in one smooth motion, swinging at the bug as it flew towards him. He ducked and turned around.

The top half of their cactus lay on the floor close to Obi-wan's foot.

Said master was only staring at him, one eyebrow cocked. "It appears that you missed."

Anakin didn't look at him. He was staring, shocked, at the bug that now sat on the cauterized end of the rest of their spindly plant. It buzzed at him.

"Master, this thing is seriously... I mean... what the heck is it?"

Obi-wan rolled his eyes and leaned back once more. "Just let it have the cactus. Maybe it'll make it happy."

"Absolutely not," Anakin declared with a sudden boost of confidence. "This thing is not winning any sort of victory. It's an intruder and must be dealt with!"

What? What?

Now Obi-wan was appalled, and slightly mystified. It was an insect, for crying out loud! He sat up once more, distantly reflecting that he hadn't done this many sit-ups in quite a long time. "Anakin, it's hardly worth the attention, and why can't it have the cactus? You just killed the poor plant and now you want to stake some sort of a claim to it?"

Anakin wasn't even paying attention. "Look at it!" He gestured with one hand. "It's mocking me! It just sits there making it's stupid little buzzing noise and rubbing its stupid little... erm... large pincers together while glaring at me through its two-dozen, beady little eyes . This will not be tolerated!"

Tolerated? He sounds like ME... Obi-wan blinked. That just sounded wrong coming out of Anakin's mouth.

Unfortunately, he wasn't able to call his former padawan off for it, because the bug chose that moment to launch itself directly at Anakin's head.

"Oh kriffitsattacknmastrahhhargh!" Anakin blindly swung with his still-ignited weapon.

Another piece of cactus flew off in a weird direction. Obi-wan deemed it unimportant and started to stand up until the chunk of spiny debris landed on his foot and stuck there. There was a brief pause in which everything came to a sudden and rather panicked pause.

Anakin stared at his former master, wide-eyed, the bug plastered on his forehead.

The pause broke with a thundering cry.

"OUCH!" Obi-wan shrieked. His body's reaction was to jerk itself backwards, propelling the typically dignified master back into the armchair with all of the gracefulness of a woozy gundark. He landed with a grunt and glared at the offending object. A jerk of his victimized foot sent the chunk of cactus speeding towards the ceiling where it struck, backed by an irritated force-push.

It stuck there and didn't move.

Meanwhile Anakin was having a much more difficult time of things. He had discarded his lightsaber, as it was seemingly useless against a determined projectile the size of an oversized pebble. Instead, he was desperately running his hands through his Force-forsakenly thick hair. He knew the bug had bit him on the forehead; he could feel it swelling up. But he'd rather it didn't bite him again and cause his whole head to swell up in the process.

"Master, help me!" he shouted.

He needn't have bothered to ask, as Obi-wan was stalking towards him... well... limping towards him with the stormiest look he had ever seen. At that point, all thoughts of finding the bug vanished to be replaced with a plan for redirecting the focus of those dreadful eyes. "Master, I didn't mean to; it was an accident and I had no idea it would land on your foot..." he trailed off when Obi-wan stopped in front of him and unclipped his lightsaber.

How many Jedi had died because they had speared their former master's foot with a cactus?

The blue blade came to life and hung menacingly in Obi-wan's right hand, clenched in a white-knuckled grip. The vein on his former master's forehead was about ready to burst. "Master..."

"Where. Is. It?"

And praise the Force, his fingers found a hard shell. He gripped it without thinking and instantly felt another piercing sting. He threw it out of his hair and stepped back.

Obi-wan's blade flew in a blur, much more precise than Anakin's own attempts had been earlier. There was a sizzling sound as the lightsaber met the hard shell of the insect's back.

The bug ricocheted off and thunked into a wall, stunned for a moment.

Both Jedi stared, shocked.

"No way..."

Obi-wan's response was much less restrained.

"IMPOSSIBLE!" he all but roared. He wasted no time in following up his first attack with an all-out pummeling of downward stabs. The bug bounced and slid around the living room with each hit, but it would not break.

"How -"

The bug flew sideways and bounced off the couch.

"- is-"

It didn't even hit the ground before the lightsaber hit it again.

"-it-"

It flew towards the ceiling.

"-still-"

It bounced off the ceiling and rebounded back towards the floor where Obi-wan was waiting.

"-ALIVE?" He swung his lightsaber with two hands and the bug became a dark blur as it whistled through the air towards the kitchen. Anakin suspected it had landed in the sink judging from the deafening crash that followed.

Apparently, the dishes were piling up.

Obi-wan started to walk towards it, but Anakin decided it was time to intervene. "Um, master... it bit me."

Obi-wan stopped and looked at him, the anger fading into concern. "What?" Then he noticed the large welt on his friend's forehead and his eyes grew large. "It's swelling awfully fast, Anakin. Maybe we should get it checked out."

A buzz sounded from the kitchen and both Jedi froze, their eyes darting towards the sink.

"I think you made it mad... again," Anakin observed.

The older Jedi's face darkened once more. "Good. Maybe this time, it won't survive..." His face fell when the bug rose out from the pile of dishes. "That is not the same bug that I tried to kill twenty times."

Anakin coughed.

Twice as many legs, and two additional pincers made the bug almost double in size. Anakin wondered for a second it the thing was related to Grievous.

And then there was no time to wonder at all, as the monster was speeding back at them with a loud whine.

"I think we should rethink our strategy," Obi-wan muttered before making a beeline for the door. Seeing his normally calm and rational former master flee in such a way caused Anakin to drop all thoughts of defending himself. He threw himself sideways, barely escaping yet another strike to his already swollen forehead.

Obi-wan grunted as Anakin smacked into his back.

"You don't have the door open yet?"

Obi-wan fumbled with the keypad and let out an irritated huff when the code didn't work. "You picked a rather convenient time to change the code again, Anakin," he muttered, voice dripping with every last bit of sarcasm he possessed, which was far more than any sentient being should be allowed.

Upon seeing the insect veer around and head towards them once more, Anakin grabbed Obi-wan by the shoulders and shoved him out of the way, not caring what sort of lecture he would receive later. "Here, I've got it. It'll just take a minute..." His fingers flew over the keypad as he started to put in the new code.

"If only we actually had a minute!" Obi-wan snapped, igniting his lightsaber once more. The bug's first attempt to reach them came to a sudden halt as it rebounded off of the azure blade.

"Just shut up and cover my back!"

"This is embarrassing," Anakin heard him grumble.

"Less talk, please!"

"It's coming back..."

Another sizzle, but this time Anakin could hear it whistling again as it flew backwards. It was getting angrier, which was making it faster.

"I've almost got it..."

"DUCK!"

When Obi-wan said duck, Anakin ducked. Lesson learned a long, long time ago. He did so without hesitation and heard the bug smack into the door. It fell down in front of him and he shrieked in protest as it squirmed around in a daze.

Obi-wan's foot made contact and the bug flew sideways and skittered under the couch. He turned his blue-gray eyes on Anakin. "Come on, Anakin, MOVE!"

Anakin's palm smacked into the largest button on the keypad and the door swooshed open. Both Jedi dove through the opening and Anakin shut it as he flew by.

Several Jedi in the hallway stopped and stared, but most just kept walking. It was, after all, completely normal for incidents like this to happen at this particular apartment.

"Well," Obi-wan began from his place on the floor. "That was interesting."

Anakin glanced at him. "Nice of you to sound so indifferent."

"Your head looks like it's going to pop."

Anakin glared.

Obi-wan smirked and stood up. "I say first we go to the healers to have that thing treated and then we head to the Archives."

"The Archives?"

"To defeat one's enemy, one must know his enemy."

Anakin grinned and stuck out his hand. "Nice to have you on my side now."

Obi-wan shook the offered hand and then walked off. "Healers."

Anakin nodded. "Right."

I know it was a long time in coming, but hopefully it was worth the wait! :) Part 2 of "Annoying Buzzing Insect" will be up hopefully soon!

Please review if you have a moment. I love getting feedback of any kind! Thanks once again for reading! :)

"Every blessed one of you feels better for that burst of laughter." ~ Ivor Novello