Chapter 4

I held the mic button for at least a full minute trying to think what the first words should be in over six months.

"Maya?" was all I could manage. She looked up, stunned at the sight of me, her lips parted slightly, and she stared. I tried to search her eyes but wasn't quite sure what was going on in that beautiful mind of hers. With me finger still on the mic button I said "Could we talk maybe? Please?" She continued to just look at me, her expression never shifting. After a long while she, I assume, gathered her thoughts, licked her full lips, and sat her bass in its stand. She got up from the stool and walked toward the door that lead her into the studio. There goes my heart thudding in my ear again. I was ready for anything, she emerged from the booth and stood maybe about a foot from where I sat. I noticed a very large lion tattoo going down the side of her upper left thigh, it was new and incredibly sexy. She leaned against the mixing board and folded her arms across her chest. Not a good sign.

"Talk? About?" Her voice was music to my ears, at least she was willing to talk.

"I'm guessing Jeff told you about our conversation?" I inquired already knowing the answer. "What did he tell you exactly?"

"Is that what you came here to talk about? Does Ashley know you're here?" That question stung a bit. I shifted uneasily in the chair.

"Ashley, isn't she your girlfriend? Or do you have someone new?" how could she not know that she was the only girl for me? I guess that was my fault.

"I don't have a girlfriend Maya and I haven't spoken to Ashley in quite some time now." I let her know in a calm tone.

"Oh, well, what is it you would like to discuss?" I looked at her beautiful face that was glowing in the dimly lit studio, and wondered where we could go from here.

"Maya I'm in love with you." I didn't know what else to say so I just told the truth. All of the emotions I was feeling rushed to my eyes. "I've spent more than six months knowing I could never love anyone but you, not like this, not this deeply and passionately." I rose from the chair and two tears escaped my eye, I walked over to her and we stood maybe five inches apart. Her arms we still folded but she lifted her head to look into my eyes and listened as i went on. "I made a mistake, the biggest mistake I've ever made, and I'd like the chance to make it up to you. How about for the rest of our lives? I'm sure my future is bright but only with you in it. I don't want anyone else, being with someone else would be an even bigger mistake because they wouldn't be you. I've tried to respect you and give you time to, uhh, get pass this terrible mistake I made, but i think I've given you long enough. I just can't go on any longer without us trying to move past this, move forward." By now my face was soaked with tears. "I can't live without you anymore baby, I'm human, I made a mistake. Is there anyway, anyway at all, that you can find it in your heart to forgive me? Please Maya, I am completely and totally in love with you. Please."

Maya made the same exact face her brother makes when in deep thought. She looked away from me as a few tears rolled down her cheek. She unfolded her arms to wipe her face and began to rub her chin.

"So what do you expect me to say?" I heard a hint of anger in her voice. "You expecting me to jump in your arms, say all is well and pick up where we left off?'

"No Maya of course not. I know i have a lot of work to do before you can trust me again and I'm willing to do whatever that takes. We can go as slow as you want, you have all the power here."

Coming over here was a bold move, her reaction could have ranged from being forgiving to being irate and throwing me out. So in the spirit of being bold I grabbed her and held her tight to my chest as i began to sob. She didn't hug back at first and her body was tense. I almost thought she was about to shove me off her when she lifted her arms to wrap them around me. Her touch sent chills throughout my entire body. Unable to control my crying I fell to my knees while keeping a tight grasp of her. With me being eight inches taller than her petite frame, my head rested just below her full breast. She shocked me again when she began to rub my hair and hold me tightly.

"I can't live without you, you're my heart, a person can't live without their heart." I rationed between sobs. "Please forgive me Maya, please." I looked up at her face searching for an answer when she didn't respond. "Please." I begged, i was already on my knees. Barely whispering i said "I need you, you're the one Maya. You're my soul mate. Baby please don't make me continue without you. I'm so sorry Maya, I'm so very sorry." I began to cry even harder. She didn't say anything, she just held me and laid her head on top of mine. That was good enough, at least it wasn't a "no".