Me: Hello!
Iggy: We're bored again so we're doing a new chapter.
Me: Gazzy's not here though.
Iggy: He's asleep.
Me: Resting after a long day of flirting with my friends.
Iggy: You gotta admit the dude's got game.
Me: He didn't even get their numbers.
Iggy: Yeah he did.
Me: Off my cell.
Iggy: He told me they gave them to him!
Me: Ah, poor, clueless Iggy. Did you not hear Gazzy trying to flirt? It was painful.
Iggy: I did. But they all seemed to like it.
Me: I'm gonna put this in the nicest way possible. My friends don't get many boys trying to or succeeding to flirt with them. I mean Helen, Rebecca, Abbie and I have never had a boyfriend. Emma's only had one.
Iggy: Victoria says she's had twenty-two.
Me: Twenty-three. But me, and a load of other people are convinced she's lying. Half of them are called Carl, Alex and Jack.
Iggy: I agree with you. She's only just turned 13. There is no way that she could have had that many boyfriends. But, hasn't Abbie had a boyfriend?
Me: I dunno. Emma said she has but Abbie doesn't even know who he is so I don't know if they're lying , joking or totally mental. I think it's the last one to be honest.
Iggy: Same. Anyway, hows about we do The News?
Me: OK.
Iggy: -News reader voice- The News today: Flashie's cup has a ginger cat on it. Gazzy: Flirt or Blurt and Flashie or Jaay, which name do you prefer?
Me: Flirt or blurt?
Iggy: -Ignores- Now, many of you may know that Flashie isn't entirely normal, but is a ginger cat cup going too far? We sent Justin to find out more. Over to you Justin.
Justin: Well Iggy, I'm here at the scene where a ginger cat cup is causing problems with Flashie's mental health.
Me: -Background- What!?!
Justin: -Ignores- The ginger cat appears to have a butterfly on it's tail. This reporter thinks it's gone too far.
Me: That is completely insane! –Walks up to Justin- -Whacks- -Walks back to Iggy- Move onto the Gazzy story!
Iggy: In a minute. We need to get more information on that particular story so we'll come back to that one in a minute. Right now we're going to see what people think about changing your name. -News reader voice- Now, Flashie's Main character Jaay is completely modeled on Flashie and then made so much cooler and hotter. No 'ffence, Flashie. So, me and Gazzy were thinking, what if Flashie changed her name to Jaay? I mean I, personally, like the name Jaay and I think it suits Flashie. It's also a better name than Flashie. Not that I don't like the name Flashie, I just like Jaay a lot more.
Me: Ok, we got enough info' on the Gazzy story yet?
Iggy: Well, when you ask your friends what type of flirting they like and don't like we will.
Me: Well, seeing as it's twenty-five past one I think that story'll have to wait until the next chapter.
Iggy:
Me: -lol-
Iggy: Shut up and do the weather.
Me: Fine. Dark.
Iggy: What?
Me: The weather, it's dark.
Iggy: … I still don't get it…
Me: It's half past one in the morning and the moon is behind a cloud so it's dark, meaning the weather's dark.
Iggy: You really gotta stop finding out the weather by looking out of the window.
Me: Well I'm not going to go outside am I?
Iggy: Why not?
Me: I don't go outside. It's to sunny. I'll get sunburn and then Annabelle and Megan will have more reason to use me as a color chart.
Iggy: Ok, one, didn't you say yesterday that we don't get sun in England? And two, Color chart?
Me: No, Iggy. You did.
Iggy: No I didn't.
Me: Yes you did.
Iggy: N-
Me: And by color chart I mean sticking their leg next to mine so they look more tanned if they forget to put fan tan on or to make me look like I've just climbed out of a vat of Tipex.
Iggy: Oh. I wondered what they were doing when they did that.
Me: Wha- Have you been looking into the girls changing rooms!?!
Iggy: -Defensive- There might be some hot bodies under all that make-up!
Me: And who do you think is the best looking?
Iggy: Erm… Well, Annabelle, Antonia, Megan, Helen, Helen and Rebecca are fat an-
Me: You do not call Helen or Rebecca fat! They just have more to love.
Iggy: Ok. And Emma's weirdly thin.
Me: Emma's awesomely thin.
Iggy: Victoria's gonna turn into an anorexic soon.
Me: Not anorexic, just really thin.
Iggy: She won't go over 7 ½ stone.
Me: Point.
Iggy: Abbie and Amber are short. Charlie's annoying. Olivia's to close with Charlie. Ellie's to high maintenance.
Me: Uh-oh.
Iggy: Who else is left?
Me: Me.
Iggy: Crap. –Panics- And, erm, you're, um, to tall! Yep, to tall. That's it.
Me: -Grins- I'm shorter than you.
Iggy: Oh, are you? Well, you're also, um, taken?
Me: Nope. Single.
Iggy: You have a crush on Philip?
Me: Yeah, but he's got a girlfriend.
Iggy: Erm, I don't like your hair.
Me: Ok.
Iggy: Phew.
Me: -Turns off camcorder-
Iggy: You recorded that?
Me: Yeah. I don't know why. It was totally pointless.
Iggy: It wasn't pointless.
Me: Really. –Turns on camcorder behind back-
Iggy: Yeah, it has me, sorta, saying how much I like you. –Claps hand over mouth-
Me: -Burst out laughing- -Falls off chair-
Iggy: Shut up.
Me: -Is still in hysterics-
Iggy: Shut up!
Me: I … Can't… Believe… You… Fell… For… It –Bursts out laughing again-
Iggy: SHUT UP!
Me:
-
Iggy: SHUT THE F&^% UP!!!!!!
Me: …
Iggy:
Me: Crazy.
Iggy: -Glares-
Me: Well, I still have this tape. –Waves tape in Iggy's face-
Iggy: -
Me: Shaddup.
Iggy: -Shuts up-
Me: Well, I'm gonna make a new YouTube video.
Iggy: Ok- NO! Gimme that tape!!!
Me: Nope. –Dances off-
Iggy: -Runs after-
-Flashie & Iggy.
Sign: -Pops up in corner of your screen- R&R?