Author's note: Thanks for all the reviews. They are much appreciated. We're getting closer to the fun stuff, the angst, the drama. Enjoy the fluff while it lasts (*Cue Evil Grin*)
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Chapter 4
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Olivia and Amanda continue to share and talk about the future, each woman shyly discussing a potential future bright with new possibilities.
"How many kids do you want?" Amanda asks, crossing a foot over her bent knee, bouncing her leg against the floor as she traces her thumb across the back of Olivia's hand. "Theoretically, I mean." She doesn't want to think she's already planning children with her. That'd be more than a little creepy.
"I'm not sure," Olivia says, her eyes closed, head resting against Amanda's shoulder. "I always wanted a brother or sister when I was growing up. So at least two."
"Trust me, siblings are very overrated," Amanda responds dryly, rolling her eyes as her mind drifts to her sister Kim, serving time in upstate New York. "When I was growing up, I would have given anything to be an only child."
"So how many do you want?" Olivia asks, head rolling to the side as those soft brown eyes focus on the blonde.
Amanda grins wryly, her blue eyes twinkling. "Two, at least. Then you can play them off of each other."
Olivia smacks her lightly on the stomach, her laughter revealing a perfect row of teeth. "You're terrible."
Amanda giggles, rolling over and planting her knees on either side of Olivia's hips, leaning down and planting her hands on either side of the brunette's head, pecking her lightly on the mouth.
"Now Liv, Let's go to bed."
A year ago, Amanda could not have imagined herself sitting here discussing the possibility of a future with Olivia Benson. Now, as she takes the older woman with one hand and leads her back to her bedroom she can imagine nothing else.
A sleeping Frannie has been settled into her crate, and even though Amanda still has a mild headache from getting clocked in the head, she's determined to show Olivia just how appreciative she is.
"Amanda, I love you but are you sure...?" Amanda raises her index finger to press against Olivia's lips, silencing her.
"No more talk," she tugs on the hem of Olivia's t-shirt, peeling the cotton over her head. The brunette's eyes darken in arousal, the hardening peaks of her nipples visible through the lacy white bra that contrasts perfectly with Olivia's olive skin.
Olivia's lips hungrily search out Amanda's, kissing her with a desire that can't be verbalized, her tongue demanding entrance that the younger woman readily grants. Amanda's own hunger grows as Olivia's tongue plunders her mouth, greedily tracing over her teeth and tongue.
Amanda's hands eagerly cup Olivia's breasts through the thin fabric of her bra, her thumbs brushing across those tightened nipples and causing the brunette to simultaneously gasp and arch into her touch. Her arms slide around Olivia's ribcage and unhook the clasp, slipping the straps down one shoulder, then the other, letting it fall carelessly to the ground.
Olivia cries out softly, breaking the kiss as those same hands cup her bare mounds, Amanda's lips moving across her chin and latching onto her pulse point. Olivia tugs impatiently at her sweatshirt, and Amanda lifts her arms, letting the older woman peel off the offending garment, hissing sharply and falling to a sitting position at the edge of the bed.
Brown eyes track across her middle, noting a pair of large bluish-purple bruises that spread out across her lower right rib cage, wrapping onto her stomach in the front and rising to armpit in the back. They begin to tear, tracing the mottled skin, across the underside of her right breast, and Olivia's hands gently but firmly grab the blonde's wrists.
"I'm so sorry," Olivia chokes out, dropping to the bed beside Amanda, a sob shaking her shoulders as she rests her forehead against Amanda's right shoulder. "I'm sorry that you got hurt. I should have been there sooner."
"No!" Amanda calls out sharply, her voice firm, her head dipping down as she grabs Olivia's chin, determined to keep her from going down this road of self-recrimination.
"Liv, this is part of the job," she squeezes her chin tightly to make her point. "Sometimes we get hurt in the line of duty. It happens. You did not do this." She shakes her chin gently for good measure. "You saved me, Liv. You got to me in time. He is dead and because of you all of those women can sleep knowing he can't hurt them anymore." A pause. "You are a hero."
Olivia pulls her chin away, sniffing as she wipes her face. Her chin drops for a moment, studying the floor for a long moment before lifting her index finger to trace over the skin.
"It doesn't hurt," Amanda says softly, and at Olivia's doubtful expression she adds, "my bookie hit me harder the first year I was with the unit."
Olivia regards her dubiously.
"Please," Amanda rests her hands on her knees, her body literally thrumming with unspent need. She pleads, "Let me love you."
"Amanda..."
"We'll go slow," Amanda cuts her off. "And at the first sign of discomfort we'll stop."
Their eyes meet in a silent battle of wills. At work Olivia may run the show, but here, behind closed doors in the privacy of their homes, they are equals.
Olivia nods slowly.
Amanda breathes a quiet sigh of relief and slowly closes the distance, kissing the brunette once more, feeling her lips yield once more to her desires, to her passion.
Amanda pushes down her sweatpants, glad for the first time that the hospital didn't provide underwear and making a mental note to burn the offending garments at first opportunity. She slowly lowers herself to the ground, tugging at the older woman's grey pants and she fights the urge to drool when Olivia leans back, lifts her hips and allows Amanda to remove both the stretchy pants and the lacy underwear in one smooth motion.
Would she drop to her knees for Olivia Benson? You bet.
Inhaling sharply the heady scent of Olivia's arousal, Amanda inclines her head towards the top of the bed, and follows the brunette as she scoots up towards the pillows, crawling between her legs like a feline stalking its prey.
Olivia lays back, biting her lower lip in anticipation, and Amanda settles back on her heels, her eyes devouring every square inch of that beautiful skin.
Convincing Olivia that she was still beautiful, still desirable, post-Lewis had taken a fair amount of work on Amanda's part, complicated even more by the fact that their encounters were presumed to be solely sexual without any real feelings behind them. Amanda still harbors a fair amount of guilt and Olivia a fair amount of uncertainty around the whole ordeal, leading to the start of a ritual that the blonde follows like clockwork any time Olivia lets her take the lead.
"God, Liv, you are simply breathtaking," she murmurs reverently, blue eyes skimming over her chest and abdomen, taking in every square inch of skin, every scar, every square inch that animal tried to mar, every square inch she has taken back for her own.
Amanda lowers herself on top of Olivia, thanking whatever God in heaven allowed her to return to this woman unscathed, kissing her softly, gently, connecting on a plane that exceeds the mere physical or psychological. Olivia's touch is oh-so-soft as her hands trace up and down the younger woman's spine, their passion gradually beginning to build.
They kiss like that for what seems like an eternity before her lips find their way along the sleek, exotic contours of Olivia's neck, kissing with her lips, nipping gently with her teeth, soothing and licking with her tongue. Amanda feels the pulse jump as she sucks her way down Liv's left carotid, the older woman's moans a sweet symphony to her ears.
Bracing her weight onto her left forearm, reveling in the delicious feel of Olivia's nipples skimming across her own, Amanda nibbles across Olivia's collarbone, sucking at the hollow of her throat, and down the center of Olivia's breastbone.
On any other day, Amanda would spend more time in this area, her lips paying a silent homage to the gorgeous woman who shares her bed. But she can sense Olivia's growing arousal and her growing impatience, and today, being in a generous mood, she's inclined to oblige.
Amanda detours briefly, tracing around a darker hued nipple with her tongue, her lips latching onto her breast and suckling on that delectable skin, trapping it between her tongue and her teeth and tugging on the hardened flesh.
"Oh God Amanda," Olivia cries out sharply, her fingers entangling with those blonde locks until they are tightly wrapped around her knuckles, Amanda welcoming the slight pain that loss of composure brings.
She lives for this, these moments when she can make Olivia Benson lose all sense of self-control.
Releasing the nipple with a reluctant pop, she makes her way to the other side, repeating the gesture, ignoring the impatient bucking of the hips beneath her, the growing scent of Olivia's arousal.
"Please," Olivia pushes against her head, fingers losing their strict hold, trying to guide her to where she is most needed.
How can she possibly resist?
Trailing her lips over the slight swell of her stomach, Amanda eases herself between Olivia's legs, reaching her true destination.
She still remembers the day she first tasted Olivia.
Amanda rests her body between Olivia's bent knees, pressing a kiss to the tender skin of her right, then her left inner thigh. She inhales deeply the intoxicating scent of her arousal, before leaning in and pressing a kiss on those sensitive lower lips.
Olivia whimpers, her legs trembling slightly as her hips jerk towards the ceiling. Unable to resist, Amanda drags her tongue the entire length of her crease, listening as those whimpers turn into moans. She sucks on each of her lower lips before using her fingers to gently spread her apart, exposing the tiny bud of flesh that is her true destination.
When she wraps her lips around that pearl, Olivia's moans crescendo into louder cries, and as Amanda lathes that sensitive flesh she slips two of her fingers inside her core, a flood of moisture easing their passage.
Amanda establishes a steady rhythm, following primarily the brunette's cues as she takes Olivia closer to the ledge. The sweet taste of the brunette's arousal is absolutely mouthwatering, the heady scent of her arousal making Amanda's heart flutter, pushing her up and over as Olivia finds her release, her hips jerking spasmodically until the brunette is spent, collapsing onto the bed in a sweaty tangle of limbs.
The blonde slowly crawls up Olivia's body, the brunette drawing the younger woman tight against her side. Reluctantly Amanda pulls her fingers from inside Olivia, wrapping her lips around the digits, tasting every last bit of her lover's release.
"God, I love you," Olivia whispers, pressing a kiss to her forehead.
"That should be my line," Amanda teases, wanting to lighten the mood. "After all you are the one who bought me a puppy as a token of your affection."
Olivia laughs, squeezing her gently. "If it keeps you from hounding me to return to work every five minutes it will be worth it."
As if on cue, Frannie Mae starts to whine.
Amanda and Olivia glance at each other.
"No," Olivia's voice is low, firm, at the unspoken entreaty.
"But Olivia..." Amanda began.
"She has a perfectly good dog bed. Egyptian cotton. High thread count." Olivia shakes her head firmly.
Amanda pouts but is settles back against Olivia, silent, waiting.
After another five minutes, Olivia groans, rolling out of bed and padding naked to the kitchen. She can hear the older woman gently chiding Frannie, calming her with that soothing tone she so often uses with her victims, and Amanda can't help but grin. She listens as Frannie settles down, the sound of footsteps returning to the bedroom.
Amanda is a little disappointed when Olivia returns empty-handed, but decides that she can fight this battle again later.
A few minutes later the whining starts again.
"Oh for Chrissakes!" Olivia rolls out from her position under Amanda, much to the amusement of the younger woman, who giggles hysterically as Olivia tromps back into the kitchen.
Less than a day and Frannie already has Olivia wrapped around her paws. More singing.
And Olivia returns again empty handed.
"About time," Olivia mutters, after all is silent for a few minutes. "I thought I was going to have to go to my apartment."
"You wouldn't dare," Amanda smacks her stomach lightly, causing the brunette to grimace and rub where her skin was stinging.
"I guess not," Olivia grumbled, pressing a kiss against Amanda's forehead and wrapping her in a loose hug. "Maybe I should have gotten you a goldfish."
She jabs Olivia in the side, both women settling down.
The whining starts again.
"Oh for fucks sake," Olivia growls loudly, storming into the kitchen. Amanda sits up on her elbows, worried.
"She's just a baby!" Amanda calls out, wondering if Olivia is going to make good on her threat to return to her apartment.
All is silent for a few moments.
The door opens and Olivia enters again, depositing a squirming, twisting lump at the bottom of the bed. Frannie Mae begins turning around, settling in a little ball at the foot of the bed.
Amanda can't keep the grin off her face.
"Not one word," Olivia warns, crawling back under the covers, turning on her side and pulling the covers over her shoulder.
Amanda smirks, scooting close to Olivia and kissing her softly on her cheek.
"I love you," she whispers, curling against Olivia's body, sighing in contentment.
There is a pause, and after a minute a kiss brushes against her forehead.
"I love you too."