Author: Baliansword
Chapter: 4, "End of 339 BC"A/N: Thanks for the reviews and the continued reading from everyone out there. Hope that everyone is enjoying life out there. I just found out next school year I'll be a senior, instead of a junior. Skipping a year, and I have a 4 year scholarship! Sorry, that's off subject, but I feel so happy! Hope everyone else out there is doing well, hope your day is rocking like mine is.
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It was too warm in the room. He glanced around, wondering what the others nearest him were thinking. Soon he recanted the statement because he truly did not wish to know. He only wanted to know what was going through Hephaestion's mind. For so long it seemed they'd been sitting there and all this time Hephaestion had been staring at anything but him. Currently he let his hair fall across his cheek and he continued to stare at his hands. After a moment he glanced up, in the direction of Philip and Cleitus, but he soon was back to imagining he was not in the room at all. There were so many places he would rather be, compared to here, where war was being planned. The last thing he wanted was to fight.
This was part of who he was, and this was part of the reason that Alexander felt he loved him so. They were opposite when it came to thinking of war and this was why he wanted to know everything that Hephaestion was thinking. The Thebans and the Illyrians, not to mention the Athenians, were all threats in their minds. However, when Hephaestion thought of what to do, fighting was the last thing on his mind. Alexander believed that they needed to have their power taken from them and defeating their military was what needed to be done. Despite knowing that these tribes were a threat Hephaestion would always disagree. He would always claim that words would solve everything.
"Alexander," the king continued, speaking to the council. All were on glass, waiting to hear what he had to say. Even Alexander glanced with a slight smile over at his father and away from Hephaestion. "You will lead forces against the Thebans, and the Illyrians. They are united now, so sources say. Set up your militia as you will for I leave it up to you. You'll ride out in a week's time."
"Yes father," Alexander said. The meeting was dismissed shortly after this. As Alexander stood he hoped that Hephaestion would stop to speak with him. However, Hephaestion had left the room as soon as others had begun to rise. At the moment he wanted nothing to do with Alexander, and nothing to do with his wars.
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The tepid water was still as he lay there, head tipped back against the side of the tub. He stared up at the ceiling. For some time now he believed that it had been spinning. His hand hung over the edge of the tub and every few seconds a small drop of water would slide down his middle finger where it would pool at the tip. Then it would plunge to the ground, and he could hear the water hit the marble floor. It was so quiet he could hear this shattering of water. Everything in him was calm at the moment except for his mind, which continued thinking, moving faster and faster every moment.
After some time he let his hand fall back into the water. He arched his back a little and slid further into the tub. The water now rose to the top of his neck, leaving only his head out of the water. He did not want to move further though. He wished to remain here where things were not so complicated. Slowly his eyes closed and he exhaled. A good hour passed as he lay there, not sleeping, but the closest thing to it, before he heard footsteps in his room. He failed to open his eyes, for he knew those steps, knew each footfall as if he himself made it. The door opened and the other entered.
"Phae?"
Hephaestion still did not open his eyes. Instead he remained as he was. He worried for Alexander but knew not how to tell him in a way that he would understand. In a week he would ride behind him, smiling all the while, pretending that there was nothing in the world that he feared. Yet he was not Alexander. Fear came naturally to him. It was not the Thebans or Illyrians that he feared though. Instead, it was true that he feared Alexander, but only because he feared loosing him. As he thought this Alexander sat down on the edge of the tub and reached out to him. Hephaestion felt his hand touch his cheek and only then did he let his lips part.
"I am here," he said quietly, unsure of what else to say. He wanted to tell him to stay but it was too late for that. Even if Alexander would have an option, he would never tell him to stay in Macedonia. It would kill him slowly if he were unable to leave. He was born to conquer. He was born to be the one that would try to claim the world. Not even Philip truly wanted to claim the world, just what was closest to him, and people gave him credit. Hephaestion knew that someday Alexander would surpass not only his father, but also all those that had come before him, even the great Achilles. The only thing that brought pusillanimity to his mind was the fact that in order to rule the world, he'd have to leave other things behind. Ruling the world would someday mean a death for never would one man be given such powers by the gods.
"Hephaestion," Alexander said, pain lingering in his voice, just behind that was excitement. "I did not mean for this to happen. You know that I love you and I would never wish to hurt you. I'm not like you Hephaestion. I do not understand words the way that you do. I fear that too little do. You are an individual that knows more of this world, more perhaps than you should, for words are your weapon. Yet you cannot fight with a weapon that others do not even know to be afraid of."
"I am not mad at you," he whispered as he slowly opened his eyes. Slowly he lifted himself out of the water until his torso was merely slick with water. He swiftly put a hand behind Alexander's neck and lowered him to him, so that he could meet his lips with his. When the kiss ended, Hephaestion held Alexander to him with his eyes. "I am never mad at you."
"I can't go alone," admitted Alexander. Tears were forming in his eyes and he did not try to keep them back. He instead wrapped his arms around Hephaestion and held him. As he held him Hephaestion kissed his chest as he slowly moved the fabric away from his body.
"Come with me," Alexander pleaded. "You don't have to fight them. You don't even have to ride out onto the field. Just come with me, ride to Chaeronea with me. You can turn back as soon as we arrive. When I return you don't even have to be waiting for me. But I cannot go without you."
"I will come. Besides," he said with a laugh, "who would lead the left legions without me?"
Alexander leaned closer and kissed Hephaestion again. This time Hephaestion wrapped and arm around Alexander's waist and pulled him into the tub. Alexander landed in the water, causing a great deal to slosh out, but he was laughing all the while. He caught his laughs though and brought his lips to Hephaestion as he leaned over him.
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"Do you ever think," Alexander said that night, as he lay sprawled across the bed next to Hephaestion, "that things would be different if you were to be king?"
"What do you mean," Hephaestion asked as he kissed Alexander's shoulder once more. As Alexander spoke he covered inch by inch of Alexander's soft skin, kissing each piece of him, wishing he could just lie beside him like this for the rest of his life. While he kissed him, Alexander let his hand trail up and down Hephaestion's spine, and in between touches he'd wind his fingers in his soft hair.
"Do you think that if you would have spoken up in the meeting there would still be war with the Illyrians?"
"Yes," he replied after considering such for a moment. He then stopped his kisses. Instead he put his cheek against Alexander's torso and gazed up at him. He put both hands on Alexander's chest, one on his upper torso, the other on his lower abdomen. "I believe that there will never be peace in this world until there is union."
"I want to unite them," Alexander said quietly. Hephaestion pressed a soft kiss against Alexander's chest, assuring him that he was allowed to continue. "Think of what it would be like Hephaestion to free all the slaves in the world. We could give them their freedom. We could give everyone their freedom. We could educate those that can't write. In uniting the world there would be no wars, no hatred, just a benefit for the common good."
"It would be a wonderful thing."
"Tell me," he whispered quietly as he played with Hephaestion's hair, "that you believe it could happen. Tell me that you believe in me Hephaestion."
"I always have, and always shall."
"Why am I afraid then that after Chaeronea, things will never be the same?"
Hephaestion did not immediately answer. Instead he kissed Alexander's chest a few more times. Each kiss was different, each more meaningful, each more assuring of his love. He lifted himself up with an elbow and continued to gaze into Alexander's eyes. He reached up and pushed a lock of Alexander's blond hair behind his ear. Then, softly smiling, he pressed a kiss to his cheek.
"Everything will change," he agreed. "You're going to become a leader Alexander. There no longer will be just Alexander the prince. Soon, you will be the one that we look to in times of need. Things will change between you and I. I will no longer be allowed to be just your friend. You won't be able to favor me with your other generals. And you won't be allowed to love me outside of our rooms. There will be two of us. There shall be Alexander the Great, and Hephaestion the general. Yet beneath that there will be Alexander, just Alexander, the one that I love now. Do not fear what is to come, for no matter what, I promise to always love you and be yours."
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Alexander sat looking at those around him. Hephaestion and Cassander had not stopped glaring at one another from across the table. Ptolemy, Craterus, and a few others were also present. He'd selected them all for different reasons. Hephaestion would always be at his side for he was the only one he could truly trust. Not to mention, he liked the fact that Hephaestion humbled himself, and would make very careful decisions, planning each moment to make sure that the smallest amount of damage would be done. Yet at the same time he had chosen Cassander for the very opposite reason.
Cassander would never make a decision through a detailed plan. He didn't care whose feet he had to trample on to get to the top. He would win battles not because he planned, but because he did. In a fight he was not like any of the others. He was violent, he would kill ruthlessly, but above all he would do this as if it was the last thing he would do. Ptolemy and Craterus were both wise and would be good leaders. They knew how to take instructions as well. Each of them would help win this campaign. As he sat there he looked at all of those that surrounded him. Each one he was proud to call one of his Companions.
"Next week," he told them, "we will be in Chaeronea to fight the Theban and Illyrian forces."
"And we'll beat the dogs down," Cassander boldly said. Alexander decided to ignore him. On the other hand Hephaestion threw a glare in the other's direction. At that moment Alexander made a mental note to never sit them next to or across from one another again.
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A/N: Hey everyone. Thanks for reading and if you're feeling good today, leave me a review. Have a great day!