A/N: I've been working on this one for a while but never really had the inspiration I needed to come up with a funny point to it. But then I watched the Texans game tonight and figured out what I was going to do! (I'm a big Houston Texans fan, so you'll notice a little mention to J.J. Watt in here. Because he's *AWSOME!*)

Superboy/Connor Kent

"Hey kid!" Connor ignored the man. Even though his super hearing made him perfectly able to know that the coach was talking to him, he just didn't feel like acknowledging him and hoped he'd go away. The coach didn't, and he put a hand on Connor's shoulder to get his attention.

"What?" The man was a little taken aback by his disrespect, but who cared?

"Your Connor Kent right?"

"Yeah, what of it?" He wasn't usually this rude to teachers, but he'd had a bad day and didn't get much sleep last night.

The coach took off his baseball cap and ran a hand through his thinning hairline.

"I wanted to talk to you about joining the football team." As if that was a shock, why else would a football coach be talking to a beefed up teenager. "I've seen you in gym class, I think you've got what it takes to be a great defensive lineman, maybe even the next J.J. Watt. What do you say? Will you come to tryouts?"

After a slight moment of thought Connor shook his head. "No thanks, I don't have time for sports." The coach scoffed in disbelief.

"C'mon kid, it's not like you've got a girlfriend to go out with."

Connor slammed his locker shut, the loud metal resounded painfully in his ears but no one stopped to see what was going on. "Actually I do, she's a cheerleader."

The Coach grinned and put a friendly arm around his shoulder, forcing Connor to hunch down. "All the more reason to join the team! A golden couple like that is sure to be in line for homecoming King and Queen, don't you want to make your girl proud?"

"Well… I-"

"Do you know how to push people over?"

"Of course, but-"

"Do you have a lot of friends?"

"No I guess-"

"Then it's settled!" The Coach announced buoyantly, letting go of Connor and already starting to head down the hall. "Be at the practice field as soon as you're out of class." Connor tried to argue with him but he was already gone and Connor had to get to history.

"I guess I'm trying out for the football team…"

He was used to sitting in the bleachers at this time of day to watch Megan's cheerleading practice, but being on the field was a totally different experience. He tried not to make a big deal about it, who cared if he was trying out for football?—even if it was against his will.

He'd told Megan about his conversation with the Coach during their history class—telepathically of course—and now she was standing on the sidelines with her cheer squad smiling at him so brightly he almost wanted to be on the team.

"Hut Hut!" called the quarterback. Connor's job was to break through the front linemen and tackle the quarterback. He still had no idea what those words meant but he knew he was supposed to tackle the guy with the ball. It was quick and easy work, much simpler than bringing down the bad guys he was usually fighting against. He pushed down two or three guys and was headed for the quarterback. As soon as the kid saw him is face went white and a few cuss words flew out his mouth. Connor started to lunge for him and just before his fingers could grab the guy's jersey another person tackled the quarterback from the side. That alone would have been fine and dandy, but just before the quarterback hit the ground, his foot collided with Connor's Kryptonian family jewels.

There was no breath to speak, no words to alleviate the undeniable pain, Connor dropped to his knees and clutched his sensitive area. The teenage boys all around him and in the bleachers let out a unanimous groan, followed by a few choked giggles from the cheerleaders.

Connor? Are you alright? That sweet voice inside his head only served to make his face more red. And for the love of Mars why was she laughing?!

Erm, Ya, just fine… He replied mentally, still on his knees but gradually getter better. Don't tell Wally. Now he really did hear M'Gann laugh.

I guess we know what your weakness is now.

He rolled his eyes, then took a deep breath when the coach offered him a hand to help him up.

"You alright kid?" The hint of a smirk dared to play across his lips.

"Fine." Connor growled.

"Good, because you're on the team. Practice starts Monday."

Connor opened his mouth to protest but the pain was too much and he doubled over and threw up his lunch.

"Dude, that's my shoes!" Someone complained.

"Haha! Serves you right for kicking him in the balls!" Someone else shouted.

Don't worry, Connor thought to the guy, I'll get payback at practice.

Let me know what you think! On a scale of 1-10 how is this? 1 being crap and 10 being fall-out-of-my-chair-epicness. (And GO TEXANS!)