Author's note:

Hey, I just wanted to say that I'm really glad people are reading this. It's a great feeling. And now that that's out of the way I want to apologize, I'm having a little trouble getting Chapter 5 started. On my profile I said that I'd try to get my work out as soon as I could, but I've hit a slight creative dry spell. Don't worry, I have no intention of abandoning Private Cain, but it may take longer than the usual, chapter per week, rate I've been going at.

Sorry…

Cain was sitting over to the side, watching as Freelancer Tex started using the rookie as target practice. Not a single bullet so much as scratched the regulation blue armor, not an easy thing to do with an assault rifle. He's good. Yeah. There's something about him though. What? I can't quite put my finger on it, but he seems… familiar I guess.

Tucker was explaining what had happened. After a while, and a few hundred rounds, Tex seemed to get the idea. He turned and charged off.

"Where are you going?" Tucker shouted after him.

"Red base. Kill everybody. Get the flag back." Man of few words. I have an odd feeling we should be glad he doesn't talk more.

"Uh… Okay! We'll just stay here and guard the trans… porter…" Caboose shouts back, trailing off at the end.

"(Pssst rookie!)" Cain quietly called. Caboose turned and Cain gestured to the sniper rifle on the crate beside him. It took a few different gestures but the rookie finally got the picture and picked up the rifle to keep an eye on Tex's progress. I know we never let Tucker get it but why aren't we just using it ourselves? My right arm is broken, that's why. … Oh right.

Thankfully it didn't take long for Tex to get started. The rookie wasn't a very good commentator but thankfully the canyon carried sound pretty well. They could here the explosion and resulting panic from where they sat. Church will be pissed. If we ever see him again. Now why would you say that? Why do you care?

"Man… he is really kicking their asses." Caboose finally said. We gathered that. Don't change the subject.

"How come I never get the fucking sniper rifle?" Cause it's fucking hilarious Tucker. Sometimes I hate you.

"I'm really glad Tex is on our team and not theirs." Caboose said as he lowered the sights.

"Sure makes things a lot easier on us." Tucker agreed. Not that you ever did much in the first place.

"Yeah. I think switching Tex for Church was a good trade." Caboose added. What? It makes sense. Cain zoned out as Caboose and Tucker continued. Why do you say that? For starters, Tex is a much better fighter than Church. Well yeah- And as a ghost Church might be more useful, if he can stick around for longer periods of time, he could do recon without us risking a live trooper. Well yeah- Hell he could walk right into red base without concern; we could even use him for psychological warfare. Alright, alright I see your point.

"BLUE TEAM, FLAG RETURNED." The blues jumped at the voice, Tucker and Caboose whipping around. Cain snapped a pistol up to fire, only to find a white transparent figure. Here we go. I vote we sit back and watch them squirm. Motion carried.

"What the…" Tucker exclaimed, "Who said that?"

Church cleared his throat. "Sorry, that was me. I uh, I guess I had something stuck in my throat." Can that happen to a ghost? Yeah how would that even work? "Your flag is back, by the way."

"Hey… it's Church."

"Yeah, it's me. Hey Caboose." Church confirmed, exasperated.

"Hey Church, what're you up to?" Caboose asked with no less enthusiasm.

"Caboose, ah-huh-huh, I'm not really here to make small-talk, okay? How'd you guys manage to get your flag back?" And the show begins.

"Wh, what? Oh, th, that flag?" Tucker stuttered, "We've always had that." Tucker takes a shot in the dark.

"Tucker," Church replied, "who do you think you're trying to fool?" Too bad he fails to connect. "Hey wait a second… Where's Tex?" And Church drops a huge bomb.

"I'm not really sure," Can Tucker turn this around? "He said he was gonna go to the store, something about uh, Elbow Grease." Answer: no, no he can't.

"Oh great. This is so typical!" And Church goes in for the kill. "What was the one thing I told you guys the last time I appeared?"

"That Sidewinder is cold!?" The rookie takes a wide swing from nowhere. And misses spectacularly.

Church let out an annoyed sigh, "What was the other one thing?"

"Not to let him get involved?" Tucker is on the ropes. Could this be it?

"Right. And what did you do?" Church presses his advantage.

"We let him get involved." Tucker concedes, Tucker concedes.

"And not just a little involved, how involved?" Church turns the attack towards the rookie.

"Very, very involved."And it's over. That's all she wrote. Good night.

"Exactly," Church continues. "You know I expected better from you Cain." What? Excuse me!?

"And how the hell was I supposed to stop him, Mr. Marley?" Cain shot back. "I got blown half to hell trying to save your life!" Still don't remember it happening but… "Caboose, what's going on over there?" The rookie gave a start and turned to get a look at red base through his scope. After a few seconds he spoke.

"Yep, he's definitely captured… or dead… captured or dead." Then he gasped, "Or captured and dead."

"Oh, well that's just perfect!" Church practically shouted.

"What? What is your problem?" Tucker demanded. "Why do you even care if he's captured, I thought you hated that guy anyway, for stealing your girlfriend?"

"I never said I hated Tex. I just said that she was the reason why we never got married."

"She?" Caboose wondered.

"… What?" Cain laughed out. Usually he was the epitome of professionalism, on the outside at least, but now he couldn't stop himself from chuckling.

Tucker didn't seem to see the humor. "Let me get this straight... you're telling me that the guy that showed up here, scared the living shit out of us, shot at Caboose and beat the hell out of the reds wasn't a guy at all? That he was a chick? And on top of that, she was your ex-girlfriend?"

"In a nutshell, yes." Church acknowledged, "That's an excellent summary." This caused Cain to get a bit louder.

"I should have known." Caboose morosely commented, "She didn't like me… Girls, never, like me."

"Caboose, I don't think anybody likes you." Tucker remarked.

"I like me." Caboose murmured.

"I don't think I've seen a girl that mean before. Are you sure she's a chick? And not a guy? Or like, part guy part shark?" Tucker suggested.

"I'm pretty sure I'd know if Tex was a guy." Cain was full on laughing now, so Church stopped to glare at him for a moment before continuing, "And I'm definitely sure I would know if she was part shark."

Cain didn't hear much of the rest of the conversation. He was laughing to hard. Why was he laughing so much, you ask? Tex struck him as a very, very dominant personality; just the thought of Church having willingly been a relationship with someone like that was hilarious. Eventually though he had to stop, for fear of breaking one of his cracked ribs. The last thing he needed was an extended recovery time. When he clued back in, Tucker was summarizing again.

"So, the military put this program in her head, and that program made her a killer. But underneath it all she's really just a sweet, down-home girl?"

"Oh hell no." Church corrected, "She's always been a rotten bitch, it's just now she's a rotten bitch with cybernetic enhancements."

"Wow." Tucker responded, his voice laced with sarcasm. "Sounds like you really won the lottery with that one. Good catch there buddy, she's a keeper."

"So how're you doing, Caboose?" Church said, "Are you following any of this whatsoever?"

"I think so… That guy Tex is really a robot, and you're his boyfriend. So that makes you… a gay robot." Oh well, maybe I can do without the ribs.

*scene break*

When Cain finally got control of himself again, the guys seemed to have moved on quite a bit.

"Well don't worry," Church said, "because I have a great plan for how we're gonna rescue Tex."

"A plan? Oh, man, I hate plans." Tucker whined. And he wonders why I don't like him. 'I don't think anyone likes him'. HA! "That means we're gonna have to do stuff. Can't we just have a strategy, or …mission statement?"

"I just need you guys to run a distraction, while I spring Tex." Church explained.

"Distraction?" Caboose queried, "Heh. That sounds a lot like 'decoy'." I think that's exactly the idea.

"The way I see it," Church continued, "the reds have absolutely no idea how many freelancers we have out here. So all I need from the two of you, is to run around in the middle of the canyon, wearing black armor, while I sneak in the back of the base." I've never been so glad to be the only one who was injured. I'd like to know how exactly Church plans to 'spring Tex'.

"Sounds good." Tucker acknowledged, nodding, "But Church, where the hell are we gonna get two suits of black armor?" Oh oh, I know. Heheheh.

Church looked to his right, Tucker followed his gaze to find himself looking at the teleporter.

"Hey Caboose!" Cain called, as Tucker muttered out a curse. "I need you to do something for me."

With some direction, Caboose maneuvered two crates into the position Cain required: one near the edge of the base one the side of the open field and the other few feet behind it. Tucker and Church stood of to the side, neither of them had ever been able to lift even one of the large boxes without help, and Caboose had one under each arm. They were muttering to each other, Cain could only make out Church saying something about God compensating. But once the rookie was done, Church announced that he'd be waiting for Tucker and Caboose at the teleporter's receiver pad. After they all left, Cain pulled the spare sniper rifle, which Tucker did not know about, out of its locker. Caboose had taken the other one with him. Grunting through the pain, he managed to get the long gun set up on the crate closer to the edge of the roof, with the bipod resting on a stack of empty med packs. Now he could keep an eye on what was going on. He would have told them to keep their radios on, but he'd had enough of their babbling for a while.

Sure he enjoyed messing with them, but moments like this… this was why he joined the army. The dead calm as the troops moved out, right before all hell broke loose, was the closest to peace he'd ever been; and ever wanted to be.

Caboose nearly screwed up the whole thing. Luckily, Red Team seemed more committed to their teammates than Blue Team was. Not sure why that orange guy thought CPR was the way to treat a head wound. Wouldn't that just make him bleed out faster? Oddly enough it worked. Well I'll be damned.