MIST

"Could you tell Luke? Is that who you could tell?"

"I -" She turned away, barely holding back the tears. There it was again. It was always about Luke for him lately, always thinking her friendship with him was more than it was. Well, it turned out it was, but not in the way Han thought. She kept having to remind herself that Han had missed the last six months, he hadn't been around to see how her relationship with Luke had developed after Cloud City. He hadn't seen Luke broken and lost, nor how long it had taken him to put himself back together, nor how much he had needed her support, as she had needed his. How much closer they had grown.

She heard him walk away, but didn't call him back. Then he stopped, turned, and approached her again. "I'm sorry," he said softly.

She dived into his arms. "Hold me," she begged.

He held her, but she could feel that his heart wasn't in it. He patted her shoulder gently, unsure, then rested his head on top of hers. She closed her eyes. She wanted to tell him, more than anything, but she knew she couldn't. If only he trusted her … but she didn't know how to make him do that. It was too much to explain, what she and Luke shared. Especially now.

"Where did he go?" Han asked finally. "Can you tell me that?"

"Vader's on this moon," she whispered. "He's gone to talk to him."

"He - what?" He held her away from him so he could look at her. "What the hell is he thinking? And you let him go?"

Leia shook her head. "I had to," she said, feeling the tears rising again. "I couldn't stop him doing what he feels he needs to do. I wish I could … But you know they have a connection."

Han sighed. "Vader killed the kid's dad, right?"

She made a noncommittal sound.

"Vader's not going to just sit and chat with him, you know that, don't you? If he doesn't kill him on the spot, he'll take him prisoner …"

"And probably take him to the Death Star, I know. Han, I tried to talk him out of it …"

He drew her close again, kissed her forehead. "I know, sweetheart. I'm sorry …"

Leia hid her face in his shoulder again. Somehow, she felt alone. When Luke had told her they were all connected, through the Force, and that they all had a part to play in this coming battle, she had taken comfort from that, thinking they would all be together: her, Han, Luke, Chewie, even the droids … like it had been in the beginning. They would face their fate together. But now Luke was gone. He had taken a different path, one that she couldn't follow him on, and she was afraid for him.

Han sensed it. He could tell that her thoughts were with Luke, not with him, not with their mission. She was in his arms, but she wasn't with him. He had known things had changed while he was frozen, but he still didn't understand what exactly had gone on, was still going on, and he hadn't had time to find out. He hadn't pushed it, thinking there would be time after the mission was over, and if the mission ended badly, then, well, none of it would matter any more anyway. But now it seemed it was already too late. Luke had gone, and Leia's heart had gone with him.

"I'm sorry," he said again.

She shook her head. "Don't. It's not your fault. It's … this mission, and … everything. Don't go."

"I'm not …"

Her head pushed against his chest, like she was trying to hide from something. She was a real mess. He'd never seen her like this, except that one time when she'd spoken to him about the destruction of Alderaan.

"I'm not going anywhere, sweetheart," he whispered. "Not as long as you want me around." Even if he had lost her, he knew that much: he wouldn't leave her while she needed him.